D-Bag-O-Meter: Tori and Douche McDermott

Dear Dean,Oh. Oh no. Oh no you didn't. First the see-through, black mesh, swing cardi. And then the summer weight man scarf, AKA marf. It's no coincidence marf sounds like barf.
Shame on you. You're a role model! I mean, look at your poor Liam. He doesn't stand a chance against the D-Bag-O-Meter of tomorrow. He might as well be wearing a bow tie. And, for the record, Gap Kids has way cuter clothes than what I'm assuming are designer pieces. While we debate spending $20 on a t-shirt, we're assuming Tori and Dean don't have that same dilemma.
BTW, Tori, we know you're knocked up. You can go ahead and lose the standard celeb belly-cup. We get it, you're gestating not on a carb binge.
Honestly, we're a little suspicious that you two are procreating for promotional purposes and that just reeks of eau de douche. I mean, these are children NOT accessories.


So, until you ditch the marf and the red carpet and take your over-styled children to a freaking playground, we're putting you at a Stage-12 Douche.

The D-Bag-O-Meter has spoken.

Yours judgementally,
LiLa