Hi my name is Cameron and I want my boyfriend to start spanking me but he says he is to scared that he will end up really hurting me because I am much smaller than him and he has much more muscle than I do, how do I convince him to give me what I want?

Hi Cameron! We’ll talk about your question in an upcoming podcast, but here’s my initial thoughts.

See if your boyfriend is willing to watch a video of a guy being spanked with you, if you haven’t already tried this. If possible, pick a video with a spanking that represents the experience that you’d like to have.

The goal here is for your boyfriend to see that the guy in the video isn’t being “really hurt,” though the spanking does cause pain. It is very hard to actually “really hurt” somebody through the process of hand spanking as long as they stay focused on the butt and don’t start smacking the lower back or spine (and even if they do, it’s not like a stray hand swat here and there is likely to cause harm).

If he’s still resistant, he may be trying to find a way to mask his own psychological discomfort in giving a spanking or the fact that the idea doesn’t turn him on the way that it turns you on. In this case, you really need to talk to him about what his concerns are and you need to reassure him that you’ll be okay if he spanks you and that you’d like him to at least give it a try once.