Not-So-Light in August

This is the first August in 11 years where I’ve wanted to press the fast-forward button straight to September. Because how exactly do you mark the August birthday of your late husband AND your wedding anniversary…when you’re very much in love with someone else? 

Experience (and research for my Modern Loss columns) points me toward carving out griefspace on milestone days. This year that meant dinner with Alberto’s sister the day after his actual birthday and spending this afternoon—my wedding anniversary—with a girlfriend after wrapping a client project this morning. 

Over the seven years since Alberto died, my August rituals seem to shift annually: sometimes there’s an emphasis on re-living memories…sometimes it’s about creating new ones. Until I’m actually in the moment, I never know which direction nostalgia will take me. So here’s to feeling the feels and going with the emotional flow. (And to the friends and relatives who raise their glasses to mine on these days.)