Lainey’s List Chapter Thirty-Nine

 

Lainey

“Lainey’s a family friend,” Nick says and tries to close the door.

Chip blocks it with his foot and then sidles inside. “This is a nice room. You don’t like what the team reserved for you?” Hands on his hips, he swivels around. “I mean, granted, our rooms don’t come with girls.”

I’m so done here. I push past Chip to get to the door but Nick’s cold voice stops me. “What is it you want from us?”

Hand on the door; I wait for Chip’s response. It’s as disgusting and chilling as I expect.

“I don’t know yet. What are you offering?”

I spin around before Nick can say a word. I don’t want him bargaining with the devil. “Why should he offer you squat? He’s the starting quarterback. You’re just a coach. You’re replaceable.”

As a look of menace passes over his face, I realize of all the stupid things I could’ve said, that was probably the worst. I struck deep at the core of his own insecurities and raised them in front of Nick. It’s unforgivable.

Nick strides over to join me at the door, ripping it open. “Get out. You can tell Coach whatever you want. We both know nothing’s going to happen to me.”

Chip’s lip curls up. “Only while you’re winning.”

“Then I’ll just have to avoid losing.”

“Good luck with that,” Chip sneers.

“When the season is over, I’ll see your ass out the door.”

Chip’s lost this round. He glares at me as he exits, hissing out a low warning. “This doesn’t end here.”

“Yeah, it does.” Nick grabs Chip’s collar and pushes him out the door, slamming it shut. He turns and gives me a look filled with simmering anger. “Want to tell me what that was all about?”

There’s no point in continuing to hide my past. Chip’s going to tell me later. I stick my chin out. “I slept with Chip a few years ago, and he thinks I’m a skank.”

A look of disgust passes behind his eyes. The elevator bell dings, signaling Chip’s departure; and mine as well. “I have a flight to catch,” I say.

For once, there’s no argument. No request for me to stay and watch the game tomorrow. Nick slowly releases the door. “I’ll call you.”

“Sure.”

I let the door close behind me. The long hallway stretches out endlessly, silent, narrow and empty. I fumble for my phone and call Charlie. I don’t know when Chip plans to spill the beans, but I have to tell my friends as much of the truth as I can.

“I left Dallas because Chip blackmailed me,” I say the minute she answers.

Charlie gasps. “Chip, the quarterback coach?”

“Yes.” I press the down button. While I’m waiting for the elevator, I proceed to tell her everything. “When I was fifteen, I made this friend online. It’s stupid but I fell for him. He was sweet, funny, and didn’t care that I was a girl playing a boy’s game. We usually only communicated via text, but as time went on, we started talking to each other over the headset. But then something bad happened to his family, and he started changing. He was barely ever online, and when he was, he was angry and sad. I tried to be there for him.”

“And this was Chip?” she asks.

“No.” The elevator car arrives and the doors slide open. I step inside and press the lobby button. “It was someone I loved, but whatever happened in his life changed this boy. One day he comes home and the console gets turned on. I think we’re starting up a new game, but he’s not playing. I hear voices in the background.”

“Oh no. You heard him with a girl?” she guesses correctly.

“Yeah. They must’ve rolled over a remote or hit the right button during their…shenanigans.” The memory of the sickness that churned in my stomach is still acute. The deed took nearly thirty minutes, and I swear he made her come at least three times. “But it wasn’t listening to him make love to this other girl that killed me. It was what he’d said after.”

“Which was?” she asks softly. I hear a rustling on the other end and imagine her settling into the corner of the sofa. It’s a comforting sound.

“Which was her asking him about the game he was playing. It must’ve been on the screen, and they just noticed. He said it was nothing, just a way to pass the time until she was around. And then he turned the game off.”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah, but really, what did I expect? We weren’t anything but bits and bytes on a computer drive.” I dig a knuckle into my eye. “Anyway, it’s not about that guy. It’s that I felt vulnerable and lonely and wanted someone special.”

“And you thought Chip was that someone?”

The elevator comes to a halt, and I step out into cool air of the lobby. Outside, the valet calls for a cab. I wait for the cabbie to arrive before I continue. “I was sixteen when I met Chip. When I slept with him for the first time. When he started giving me drugs.”

“Oh my God, Lainey.”

“I…I know it was stupid, but whatever he asked me to do, I did.” I lean my head against the window and stare unseeingly at the passing landscape as the taxi motors toward the airport.

“You were so young.”

“And stupid. Don’t forget stupid.”

“Chip took advantage of you,” she says firmly.

“No, I wanted it. Or at least I wanted the intimacy. The feeling that I was someone special to him.” Like that other girl had been to that boy. Like I thought I had been to that boy.

Charlie grows silent and I can almost hear her brain putting two and two together. “So Chip…he’s the father?”

“Yes.” It’s easier to admit that I thought it’d be.

Charlie clicks her tongue against the roof of her mouth. “He’s such an asshole. Does he have any contact with Cassidy? I’ve never seen him near her.”

“No, I don’t want him near her,” I say fiercely. “He’s poison, Charlie. He’d fill her head with the most hateful lies, and he certainly doesn’t love her.”

“But you have full custody right?”

“Not legally. We’ve never been to court.”

She sucks in a sharp breath. “And he’s threatening you, isn’t he?”

“Yes. He has pictures. Evidence of terrible things I’ve done.”

“Things you did when you were underage,” she shoots back. “He’s just as culpable.”

“He didn’t know. I never told him. I pretended to be eighteen.”

Charlie curses. “He knew, though. He knew.”

“Maybe he did.” I sort of agreed with Charlie. Chip liked to prey on young girls—ones who idolized him and were too scared to do anything but scuttle away passively when he was done using them. “But it doesn’t matter because I don’t have pictures of him. I don’t have any proof.”

“Except for his DNA.”

“And I took money in exchange for not putting him on the birth certificate. For not challenging him. Just telling you about it probably violates at least five different clauses in the agreement.” The one he had me sign in that cold lawyer’s office while Cassie was still in my tummy.

“Shit, honey. So what now? Do you want me to hire a lawyer so we can take Chip to court? Because I’d love that. It’d probably be the best money I’ve ever spent.”

“No. I’m telling you, though, because I’m done. I’m done being afraid of him. If he comes after me, then maybe I’ll take you up on the offer.”

“But you think he won’t,” she concludes.

“I’m hoping.” Because I don’t want that public fight. But I guess I’ll do it if it means I don’t have to live under a Chip sized cloud for the rest of my life.

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