Baked Scribe Flashback : Ad Spaced

 

“Look, I misread your ad all right? Can we just stop dwelling on it?” Angel’s patience was officially spent.

“It was in the singles section! How could you have misread it?”

“You had so many God dammed abbreviations in there, I couldn’t—”

“Do you have any idea how expensive those ads are?”

“No.”

“Well they’re expensive. I had to use all those abbreviations, because otherwise I couldn’t have afforded it. Besides, there’s a guide at the bottom of the page explaining them all.”

“Well I didn’t see that either.”

“You don’t see much do you?”

“I can see enough to see that you need to bite my—”

“Look, as charming as I’m sure the end of that sentence was going to be, how about we just call the whole thing off? Cut our losses. Sound good?”

“Fine. Bye.”

Angel watched her storm off across the parking lot. He had used this tactic of “misreading” personal ads, pretending to set up a date in order to fish for new victims for over a year now. Normally at this point, he would feel the tiniest twinge of guilt, but now he felt proud to have lifted her wallet. She hadn’t felt a thing and he deserved the cash for his time and for putting up with her attitude. He was at the Grand Canyon after all. At least he could get a souvenir and maybe a sandwich out of the deal, on her dime.

He stopped, mid-thought and mid-stride, as two things happened in rapid succession. The first was when he opened her wallet and found it to be empty, save for the fake paper credit cards that sometimes came with new wallets.

The second was when he looked to check the time and discovered that she had stolen his watch.