Brief Excerpt of Lost Soul
I don't usually post this snippet of the book. I have decided to post this once for personal reasons. This excerpt includes a spoiler. Read at your own risk or delight.
Sometime later I awoke and stared around the darkened room in confusion. I could have sworn I heard a child crying. Sitting up, I listened intently. I heard deep and even breathing from beside me. I glanced to my left and saw Samuel sleeping soundly next to me. It was only now that I realized the crying I thought I heard had been part of a dream. My daughter was dead. There were no children in this house.
I stared at the far wall as I was overwhelmed by the grief I had tried so hard not to feel. I drew up my knees and wrapped my arms around them tightly. Sobs racked me, the hard silent ones that nearly make one double over in anguish, but don’t make a verbal sound. There were barely any tears that fell; it seemed as if the pain was too deep for them to come. I began to rock with my eyes tightly clenched shut, silently trapped in my own private world of agony.
“Julia?” Samuel whispered. My rocking must have woken him; I had yet to make a verbal sound. I couldn’t answer him and he spoke again. “Julia, is that you? Are you all right?”
I rocked faster and opened my mouth to answer him, but my throat seemed to be closed off. I heard him sit up and I turned my head towards him and opened my eyes. My vision suddenly blurred with the tears that had refused to come until now.
“Oh, Julia . . . .” Samuel murmured, reaching out to touch my shoulder. At his touch, I unraveled from my awkward position and practically flung myself at him.
“My baby . . . gone forever,” I whispered as I burst into tears. I had landed against his chest and I felt his arms wrap around me, holding me close. He said nothing else but stroked my hair as he held me, until I fell into an exhausted sleep.
* * *
Sometime later I awoke and stared around the darkened room in confusion. I could have sworn I heard a child crying. Sitting up, I listened intently. I heard deep and even breathing from beside me. I glanced to my left and saw Samuel sleeping soundly next to me. It was only now that I realized the crying I thought I heard had been part of a dream. My daughter was dead. There were no children in this house.
I stared at the far wall as I was overwhelmed by the grief I had tried so hard not to feel. I drew up my knees and wrapped my arms around them tightly. Sobs racked me, the hard silent ones that nearly make one double over in anguish, but don’t make a verbal sound. There were barely any tears that fell; it seemed as if the pain was too deep for them to come. I began to rock with my eyes tightly clenched shut, silently trapped in my own private world of agony.
“Julia?” Samuel whispered. My rocking must have woken him; I had yet to make a verbal sound. I couldn’t answer him and he spoke again. “Julia, is that you? Are you all right?”
I rocked faster and opened my mouth to answer him, but my throat seemed to be closed off. I heard him sit up and I turned my head towards him and opened my eyes. My vision suddenly blurred with the tears that had refused to come until now.
“Oh, Julia . . . .” Samuel murmured, reaching out to touch my shoulder. At his touch, I unraveled from my awkward position and practically flung myself at him.
“My baby . . . gone forever,” I whispered as I burst into tears. I had landed against his chest and I felt his arms wrap around me, holding me close. He said nothing else but stroked my hair as he held me, until I fell into an exhausted sleep.
* * *
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