I’ve discovered the secret to publishing success!
I’m going to share with you the most important tool any writer can have. Seriously, you can’t be a writer without it. Wanna finish that novel? Become a bestseller? Get that big-ass publishing contract? DO YOU? Then you need this. It’s absolutely essential.
Now, you’ll get a lot of writers saying advice is trash, that you should never go in for quick schemes, that there’s no easy way. Well I say: WRONG! They’re all wrong! Every one of them. If you’re a writer, then you should pay attention. Or maybe you’re not a writer. Maybe you’re a POSER. Maybe you’re a limp-wristed, namby-pamby quitter. If so, then turn around and walk your ass on out of here! If not, stick around. I’m about to break down the secret to publishing success…
A really good pair of shoes.
These are mine.
They are a pair of Air Jordan Deluxe basketball sneakers. Leather trim, high-top, mesh tongue, webbed lace loops and, according to Nike, an Air Max Cushioning Unit in the heel. They are comfortable and commodious and the secret to success. I couldn’t write without them, and I thank every little starving sweatshop kid who made the damn things. Top job, you little scamps.
Now, you don’t have to have a pair of Air Jordans. Your shoes could be any shoes, as long as they’re comfortable. But you gotta have them. I don’t care how much of a barefoot-tree-huggin’-peace-lovin’-beatnik-hippy you are. Get your ass to a Foot Locker.
The reason you need them is to lubricate your mind. Too often, I find myself staring at a blank page, the cursor blinking, daring me to start and knowing I won’t. Even more often, I’ll find that I’ve written two characters into a corner: they need to be at point B, but they’re at point A, and they only have thirty minutes to make the trip, and one of them has no legs, and also there’s a nuclear war being fought by velociraptors and ninjas. To fix that problem – the characters, not the nuclear war, I like nuclear war, it’s good for the plot – I put on my shoes, and go walking.
You would not believe just how effective this is. The act of standing up, going outside and pounding the pavement is like squirting mental WD40 into the sticky hinges of my brain. Sometimes, I’ll have a solution before I’ve even reached the elevator in my building. But I go for a walk anyway, because I like it.
I do my writing in the morning, usually starting before the coffee has really kicked in, and so there are very few days when I don’t get my ass outdoors. It’s a comfortable, reassuring way to start work. And to do it effectively, you can’t be worrying about bunions. Sore ankles? Ingrown toenails? Kill that noise. Your shoes are more important than your computer, your notebooks, your coffee budget, your pens, your hipster jeans, your pricey script-writing program. They are everything. You think Hemingway had bad shoes? Ha! Hemingway had bad-ass hiking boots made from the skin of yetis and whales*, and he walked them motherfuckers FLAT.
*This may not have actually happened
I use the shoes for other things of course. Not just for playing basketball badly, but for working at my standing desk. Don’t worry, I’m not going to bore you with the whole SITTING IS KILLING US ALL schpiel, but I’m a convert. I stand for an hour or two every day at my desk, and believe me, a comfortable pair of kicks is pretty essential.
Key to publishing success, bruh. Believe me. Next time you’re stuck writing something, go outside. You’ll never look back.
(Actually, remember to look back now and then, especially if you hear someone coming up behind you).
OK. Time for some news bits!
TRACER turns 1!
So there’s this thing called a book birthday. I didn’t know it was actually a thing, but there you go. When your book has been out for a year, you’re supposed to celebrate with 10 Things I’ve Learned blog posts and Tweets of you holding a birthday card and a slice of cake and…look, I can’t be arsed, OK? TRACER is one year old, it’s fucking awesome, it got great reviews and sold well and I’m super happy with it. Plus:
ZERO-G is out in under two weeks!
Holy yak balls, Batman. ZERO-G (the paperback) is finally coming to North American bookstores. I am out-of-my-mind excited. To celebrate, check out the story about the time we actually sent a copy into space.
LA visit
I’m doing a quick Los Angeles visit this weekend. There is a chance I MAY be heading over to The Last Bookstore to sign some stock. If I do, I’ll tweet about it. Come say hi!
Nineworlds
The UK’s foremost geeky convention is happening in London, 12-14 August, and you best believe your boy’s gonna be there. I haven’t got my panel assignments yet, but you can see the kind of thing I’ll be blathering about right here. Plus, I’ll be signing books, doing readings, falling over after one too many beers, and hanging out with the other great authors and creators at the con. Come say hi!
#ImpactDay
I still can’t quite believe we’ve reached the end.
The journey we started with TRACER is finally coming to its explosive, nailbiting conclusion. In the third book of the Outer Earth trilogy – pictured left in all its burnt-orange glory – Riley Hale has crash-landed on Earth, hundreds of miles from her friends, alone in a hostile wilderness. But she isn’t going to let that stop her from finding Prakesh and Carver…and reaching a reckoning with her old nemesis, Janice Okwembu.
I’m so excited for this. You’re going to love this book. You can preorder it here – and by the way, if you’re on Twitter or Facebook, the hashtag for this one is #ImpactDay.
