The Fiver | Counting the diamonds around sinks in other people’s homes

In today’s Fiver: the Euro 2016 quarter-finals! Plus Sisqo and swimming

The Fiver is a big idiot. This much you know. But here’s some breaking news, beloved reader: you’re a big idiot too! Every time the draw is made for a major tournament, and despite decades of evidence to the contrary, we and you and everyone we know assume that it will pan out roughly in accordance with the seedings. Had that occurred at Euro 2016, the quarter-finals would start tonight with Spain v Switzerland, followed by England losing on penalties to Portugal, then Germany v Italy and France v Russia. Half of those sides are already at home, counting the diamonds around sinks in other people’s homes. And the quarter-finals of this memorably soulful tournament start with Poland and Portugal, who – primarily because of Spain finishing second in their group – may never again have a better chance of reaching the finals, never mind the semis. The winners will play Wales or Belgium in the last four. You would, wouldn’t you?

Related: How Poland players overcame adversity to shake up Euro 2016 | Nick Ames

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