Kept from You: The Missing Belly Whoosh

As some of you know, I've been in my writing cave this last week with Killian and Savvy (Kept from You) and I’ve neglected family, friends, social media, emails and poor Gimli.

I thought it important I step back a minute and let everyone know what’s happening because I will be here a while longer.

Last week "Kept from You" was almost done. I had reached 86,000 words.
At this point in my writing, I usually have my content editor start reading/editing. And I go back and read what I've written before I work on the ending and epilogue.
Then my editor and I discuss issues and possible changes.

It's my process as I don't map out books, I feel them and write what comes to me, so I expect changes. There are always changes. I let the characters tell me where the story goes, this way when I sit down to write, it’s fresh. I’m excited to see what happens too.

But Killian and Savvy's story (Kept from You) has been a struggle from the beginning. I wrote five beginnings of twenty to thirty thousand words each. All of them i tossed.
They weren't right. The passion wasn't there. Something was missing.
But like most jobs, I have deadlines to meet.

I finally decided on a beginning and stuck with it. I fell in love with Killian and Savvy, but the story was still difficult to write. I struggled with scenes and direction. The characters weren’t telling me the story.

I pushed on and months later, 86,000 words written, I handed it to my content editor.
She saw what I didn’t. She knew what was wrong.

I hadn’t been able to see it, but I FELT it while writing. When you spend so much time in a book, you can’t always see clearly. You’re too close to it.

The story was missing the belly whoosh. The deep inner need to get to the next scene because you have to know more.

After much discussion with my editor, heart ache and fear... I scrapped the book and started over. Some scenes get to stay (because their sex is hot), but a lot is gone.

I cried. Broke down and cursed.
With my deadline looming, I considered for about one second to finish the book as is. It’s good. Killian and Savvy I love and the issues can be fixed.

But I couldn't. It’s not me. It’s not why I write.

Every book I've released, my heart and soul are on the pages. I realize not everyone will like them and that's okay. But i have to love them.
I have to love the characters, the story, the words.
I need to feel that belly whoosh with every scene. Live the tears, punches, heartbreak. Because if I don't, how can I expect a reader to.

I love writing more than anything. It lives and breathes inside me and I cherish that feeling.
I wake up every morning thankful I get to do this.
I’m honored that people read my books. I’m amazed and humbled by the kind messages, comments, and all the support I receive every day.

Starting over hasn’t been easy. But it’s worth it.
Kept from You has new life. I'm only 33,000 words in, but the words are flowing freely and when that happens I know it's right.

Those 86,000 words aren’t wasted because I learned so much more about my characters.
I hope to make my deadlines, but I will be locked in my cave from sunup to sundown. Which is okay, because I love being here.

Thank you to my friend and brilliant editor Kristin who has offered me endless support and direction. She has been with me since the beginning and is truly amazing.

I will get to messages soon and I apologize for the delay in my response to many. Thank you to everyone for all your support and love.

Hugs,

Nash xoxo

I will be at the signing in Scotland in July! My computer loves to travel.