I'm right, You're wrong

The clash of ideologies we see in America is astounding. How is it that we as human beings can be so divided on issues? Take a look at guns, abortions, capitalism, welfare, war, immigration or any other hot topic. You will find American’s opinions split down the middle. People are not only split but take a very strong stance in support of their view and seem to have no tolerance for the other.
It also seems that in most cases if you side with a group (Conservative or Liberal) on one topic, you tend to agree on all. If there is one or two topics you stray from your group on, it is usually a topic you don’t talk about. Could it be that our brains are designed to think one way or the other, or could it be something else that is causing us to take sides? I do believe the split is politically driven, but in a way that utilizes the internal weaknesses we have as humans. I believe we are driven by our need to be "Right".
This topic became very interesting after I witnessed a conversation about abortion. The woman who was “for abortion” got so irate that she was belittling the woman who was against it. The woman who was against abortion  believed that it was “wrong” to do. Their definition of wrongwas obviously different, and that distinction could have been part of the problem. But the real interesting (and scary) part was the fact that the woman supporting abortion could be so destructive and demeaning in supporting her view. It literally came down to name calling and personal insults. <Disclaimer: This article is not about abortion. You can insert any topic you'd like.>
This got me thinking, “What would it mean to some people if they were to admit their views or beliefs were inconsistent or without merit or if they were able to see the other's point of view?” What would it mean about them as a person? What would it mean about someone if they were “wrong”?

We are generally insecure in many ways. We need reassurance often. For example, let's say you just bought a boat-load of stock in a company called Wizbang and the day after you bought it the news announced that they made a merger with another company causing the stock to almost double. You'd feel pretty secure about your position. But let's say as soon as you bought your Wizbang stock everyone you know told you that the company will tank and you made a horrible decision. You'd probably feel insecure or at least question your choice. The feeling of insecurity can apply to a wide range of things--from not knowing why your car is making a grinding noise, to going into public with a bad haircut. The truth is, we feel better about ourselves when more people agree with us.

What does it mean about me (as a person) if others disagree with me?

Why does it matter what other people think?

Why do we care if people agree with our views?

I'll tell you. Validation. "The more people that agree with me, the more valid my argument is." At least that's what we think. This is so important to some people that they will argue their point to the extent that it turns into personal bashing, name calling, ridiculing and sometimes even physical confrontation. That's how important it is to some people to be "right" about something.

So what causes this need to be right and why is it that some people don't care who agrees with them? It comes down to confidence and self-esteem. Those who are confident, don't need validation from anyone and have no need to rally people to their side of the argument. Those who are unsure of themselves will argue to the death because one more person on their side validates their claim a little bit more and helps them feel more secure in their own beliefs.

When someone is all alone on a topic, it's inevitable that they stop and wonder why. Some will fear the thought because they think the rest of the world might know something they don't and some might wonder why everyone else hasn't seen reality yet. Again, this comes from the level of confidence that person has with respect to the topic. Standing alone with your beliefs amidst contradiction and even confrontation is a great measure of confidence and strength in your personal ethics and beliefs.....or is it ignorance and delusion?

To your Success,
Dan Wos