Mark Maddenisms

You knew I'd get around to him eventually. From his column in the Torch this morning. It's short, but there's so much to mock:

Punk and Cena will still wrestle in Chicago, except now OHMYGOD PUNK MIGHT SHOOT WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN?!?!?!

Mark Madden: lifelong ten year old.

Honestly, I'm not sure exactly what the purpose of Punk's promo was.

Mark Madden: lifelong point-misser.

But the majority of the audience had little idea what Punk was talking about. Let Impact book for the IWC. WWE has prospered by booking for the casual fan. This was a rare departure from that. Let's see how effective it is.

Mark Madden: Completely unaware of WWE's narrative of convenience.

If Punk's promo was a shoot, his mic would have been cut RIGHT AWAY.

Mark Madden: Unaware that Vince McMahon loves controversy.

Paul Heyman, Brock Lesnar…why invoke guys who aren't there? THEY CAN'T DRAW MONEY.

Mark Madden: So invested in drawing money he was the voice of WCW in 2000.

There's a chance that the quality of the promo and Punk's charisma will push the promo's effectiveness past its content. But when Punk talks about being oppressed by the boss – about working for an idiot and a doofus – isn't that a babyface promo? Isn't Cena the babyface, albeit a babyface with tenuous fan appeal right now? Is Punk turning? Given Cena's unintentional slow flip, isn't that counterproductive?

Mark Madden: Unaware of the definition of baby face promos, tenuous fan appeal, and unintentional.