On a mission from God

Missionaries came to my door on Sunday for the first time ever, smiling folks from a church elsewhere in the city. We had a pleasant chat. (Them: One hundred and forty-four thousand people will go to heaven! Me: Is there a limit? Them: The Book of Matthew is not in your Bible? Are you Hindu?) The problem was, it was too pleasant. They never made the ask. At some point, when I could no longer bear to hear them nattering on about the Israelites of the Bible I am supposedly the incarnation of, I said I had to play with my kids (true!) and went inside. They let me go inside without switching teams. If I go to Hell, it's on them.