The stupidest metaphor in the whole wide world

Without question, the stupidest metaphor in the history of metaphors is drunk as a skunk. 

It is a metaphor not based upon meaning but simply upon rhyme. 

Skunks have absolutely nothing to do with alcohol consumption or inebriation.

Skunk and drunk rhyme.  That is the extent of the metaphor.

That makes it incredibly stupid.

As stupid as:

Big as a twig

As sad as glad

As nice as an improvised explosive device

Except these aren't universally utilized metaphors. 

Drunk as a skunk is.

Please help me put an end to it.