Jokes: Children Are Quick

My school superintendent (Head of School) at Maharishi School just sent the teachers a fun and supportive end-of-year email. He closed with a series of jokes that had been emailed to him from a friend.

He said to share them with others, so here they are!


Children Are Quick _______________________________ 
TEACHER:    Maria, go to the map and find North America  . MARIA:         Here it  is. TEACHER:   Correct.  Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS:         Maria. ____________________________________   
TEACHER:   John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN:          You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ 
TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' GLENN:      K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER:  No, that's wrong GLENN:       Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it..   
(I  Love this child) ____________________________________________ 
TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD:     H I J K L M N O. TEACHER:   What are you talking about? DONALD:    Yesterday you said it's H to O.   __________________________________ 
TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE:       Me! __________________________________________   
TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty? GLEN:          Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.   _______________________________________ 
TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.' MILLIE:         I  is...TEACHER:     No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.' MILLIE:         All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'     ________________________________ 
TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.  Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? LOUIS:           Because George still had the axe in his hand....     ______________________________________   
TEACHER:    Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SIMON:         No, sir, I don't have to; my mom is a good cook.   ______________________________ 
TEACHER:        Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's... Did you copy his? CLYDE  :         No, sir. It's the same dog.    
(I want to adopt this kid!!!) 
___________________________________ 
TEACHER:    Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? HAROLD:     A teacher 
And as a closing remark, for that last joke, I have to say "Ouch!"