Arnold Must Die
Arnold Must Die
by Nancy Martin
A few years back, a writer acquaintance of mine was revealed to have plaguarized her books. Actually, her secretary--whom the writer had hired to write the books so that she could go around promoting all the time--took large chunks of novels written by very famous authors with huuuuge fan followings and inserted passages into her boss's outlines. It was the fans who pointed out the plaguarism, and my acquaintance was humiliiated. So humiliated, in fact, that she did the only thing she really good could in this situation.
She died.
Lately, we here at the offices of TLC have not bothered to blog about one of the big stories in the news these days--Arnold and his impregnation of a household staffer and subsequent support of the resulting child without his wife getting wind of it. (When I last checked, Maria had hired a PI to investigate further, and there are rumors of at least one more illegitimate child floating around, but because many of us are mothers with kids to protect we won't go there today.) Normally when an event like this explodes across the media, and the Tarts are all over it. But the reason we haven't blogged about this subject is because--well, the only conclusion we can really draw is this:
He's an asshole. Case closed.
That's a short subject, so what's the point in blogging about it? (If you think you can defend Arnold's behavior, pleasepleaseplease do so in our comments section. I would love to see our backbloggers take you down.)
But what's been noodling around in my head lately is the possibility that Arnold is going to re-invent himself after this asshole-ish behavior. After treating his wife so cheaply. After behaving like a Neanderthal in his own home. There's a good chance he's going to come out of this mess smelling like a--well, okay, maybe not smelling wonderful, but certainly with his income stream preserved. There were a few weeks when even Bill Clinton's most diehard supporters surely figured that cigar + stained blue dress + end of career. But no, Bill has bounced back. Flourished, even. While leading the charge to impeach the provocative president, Newt Gingrinch was cheating on his wife with a woman on his staff. And now Newt's running for president himself. Eliot Spitzer has his own TV show. And, gee, a certain person accused of misbehavior might still be on the Supreme Court. You can flesh out my list pretty easily, because there are so many examples of powerful men who feel they can do whatever they want just because.
My friend the humiliated romance writer did not feel she could do much of anything after her character was called into question, but that's a certain kind of woman for you, right? There are certainly babes running around making idiots of themselves with no guilt whatsoever.
Will Arnold go back to playing robots in the movies? (Insert soulless joke here.) Or maybe run the International Monetary Fund? I hear there's an opening.
I'm finishing my book today---yes, TODAY is my deadline--but I'll check back. Meanwhile, here's a quote:
"Why a man, because he has millions, should assume that they confer omniscience in all branches of knowledge is something which may be left to the psychologist to answer, but most people thrown much in contact with millionaires will agree that an attitude of infallibity is typical of a fair majority."
Emily Post, From Etiquette, 1945, Funk & Wagnalls Company.
And, okay, just for fun because it's Wednesday and neither one of these character is married, so just enjoy. A girl on deadline needs her Clooney fix:
