Summer of Discovery: Risk & Change
Hello everyone and thanks to Maria for having me in for a visit!
I've been thinking a lot about discovery lately and one of the things that's really hit home is that while the word carries this wonderful connotation of fresh encounters, wonder, joy and excitement, it also can have negative connotations–fear and worry primary among them.
Discovery implies change and I think that change itself can be both frightening and wonderful. But once you discover something, once you know it, you can't unknow it. As humans, I think we're inclined to want to discover. To expand and to enrich ourselves and even though we know that pain can come with that, we are willing to put ourselves out there because the joyous possibilities outweigh the more frightening ones. Or so we tell ourselves anyway, and I think we are mostly right.
I'm working to create a change in my life and it means there's going to be a whole lot of discovery to come. I'm terrified. And exhilarated. I've got to have faith that it will all come out in the end—faith in me, faith in my family, and faith in the world.
Which brings me to risk. Discovery also implies risk along with change. Because you are taking a chance that whatever you discover won't be a good thing. We have to rely on ourselves to carry us through and sometimes I think we doubt our strength. We fear our fragility to handle what comes. It's hard to believe in our own untested strengths, and I think we push ourselves to find out what we are capable of.
Writing is a journey of discovery that can be terrifying. Not like there's a serial killer stalking you sort of terrifying, but more in the chance we'll discover we are fragile, or we aren't capable, or we aren't good writers. That fear is tied so tightly to our sense of personal value that it can become debilitating. You've heard the advice, I'm sure, that if you have any choice about becoming a writer, if you can choose anything else, do it. That's because writing is so hard on levels that many people don't understand.
It's just words. If they don't turn out, write more. Sounds simple. But then you have to wonder if the bad words signal a discovery you need to make—that you can't write. That you are a hack. That you should never have left that fast food job. The doubt worms into your soul and is impossible to fight.
But then there are moments of discovery where the story just grabs you and the words flow and pour out and they are so right. You can hardly keep up with them, your fingers flying over the keyboard. At the end of the day, you just want to hug yourself and chortle madly and then jump up and dance.
Those days don't come often enough, but they are the days of discovery for writers. When we find new worlds, new friends, new enemies, new joy. When the worms of doubt incinerate inside us and we're whole again.
It's scary and it's dangerous. It makes it all worth it. But it's the reason I keep writing.
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Thanks, Diana! Risk and change – yep, that's pretty much the standard writer mantra, right? We create worlds, even if firmly ensconced in the "real world", create people, make stories that we hope others will want to read. Eek! Why do we do this again? Oh yeah, because it's cool!
How about you readers? What risks or changes have you discovered in your lives, whether writing or just in something you love to do? Would you give up the risk or avoid the change? What kinds of benefits have you encountered?
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Her website
Mad Libs, her blog
