Things You Just Can't Argue With

Melinda: You smell...unusual.
Me: It's probably mulch. (Note: had spent much of the afternoon purchasing, schlepping, opening, laying down and spreading large amounts of cypress mulch to cover over last year's thoroughly eroded cypress mulch. I don't spend a helluva lot of time on the lawn, but I have enough pride to cover up the worst spots. Barely.)
Melinda: OK, that makes sense. You don't normally smell like swamp trees.
Me: I have absolutely nothing to say to that.