The Trouble With Language Acquisition

So despite having a fair number of 'bad words' in my books (98% of my male characters are warriors, and I just couldn't make myself realistically imagine their speech patters as squeaky-clean) I don't use swear words myself. Really not ever. Not that I mean this as a holier-than-thou kind of statement, because it's not that I'm especially offended if other people swear. I mean, there are obviously MANY worse things people can do than use curse words, right? It's just . . . not me. My four year old will drop something and yell "Oh BOTHER!" because that's about the worst word she's ever heard me use. I mention this only because it makes Vivi's (age 20 mos.) recent language development all the more ironic.

One of Vivi's favorite words to say is "sit". She can now climb up and "sit" on the couch all by herself and is VERY proud of herself, and she wants you to come and read to her or play with her, she'll pat the ground or couch next to herself and say, "Sit! Sit!" Which is great. Except that she has a slight lisp, whereby an 's' sound becomes 'sh'. Which means that the word 'sit' when she says it sounds like, um, another word entirely. Our conversations tend to go something like this:

Vivi, patting the couch cushion next to her: "Mama sh**!"

Me: "Mama sit. Say 'sit', sweetie."

Vivi: "SH**! SH**! SH**!"

Me: "How about we just go with, Mama read?"

As if this isn't enough, one of Vivi's other favorite words is 'frog'. She has this little frog toy, you've probably seen the kind, with the suction cup in the base, so you push it down and then the frog 'hops' when the suction cup releases? She LOVES it. Also great. Except that in Vivi-speak the word 'frog' sounds like another word that also starts with 'f' but rhymes with 'truck'. I kid you not. The other night I was talking to Nathan and she was BELLOWING it, trying to get my attention so that I would come and play with the frog with her. Nathan, who had never heard this particular word of hers before did kind of a double take then gave me raised eyebrows, mouth twitching as he struggled not to burst out laughing, "What is she saying now?"

Ahhhh, what can I do? Just remember, if you happen to see my child in public and hear her version of 'sit' or 'frog', she's not saying what it sounds like. I swear. Um, I mean, I promise.