New Beginnings
When I was a little girl, I had four dolls. They had names, of course, and after school I would play ‘house’, pretending to be their mother. I wanted nothing more than to read, write stories and have four kids. Oh, and be married to Ken. You know, as in Barbie and Ken. Some things never change. Well, the Ken part changed, but you get the point.
Yes, some things never change.
Some things do.
Riversong is five years old. In the time between then and now, a lot has changed for me, both professionally and personally. It’s staggering, when I think of it. Divorce. Loss of close friendships. The rise and fall of my publisher. (A few weeks ago they announced they were closing at the end of May, thus leaving me thirty days to figure out what to do with my catalogue). This coming Monday, my baby, Emerson, turns ten. (She was eight months old when I started working on the first draft of Riversong.) I’m closer to fifty than forty. I have a teenaged daughter that, most days, is unrecognizable from the little girl she was five years ago.
A lot of changes.
Change can be hard, but in my case, at this juncture, after some hard times, good times have come again. Last year I met and fell in love with a man who seems custom-made just for me. Not perfect, but perfect for me. A widower, with some hard times of his own, although not my story to tell, we connected almost immediately. Not only did he make me laugh within two minutes of meeting, we quickly discovered we had shared values, similar interests, and although we’d both experienced great loss and disappointment, were brave enough to be out there, trying again. He’s a great father, believes in my writing, is a steady influence in every area of my life, including this difficult book business, and he has more cats than me! Yes, you read that right. Smart in ways I’m not, he’s thoughtful, gentle and makes my stomach do those crazy dips and dives whenever he walks into a room. We’re so in love and happy together, like one of the couples in my books, that I sometimes wonder if he’s a figment of my writer’s imagination and I really have gone crazy. Honestly, I didn’t think this kind of love was possible, for me, at least. But it was. It is.
Oh, and he’s way better than Ken. Although, he does have incredibly thick hair that hardly moves, just like Ken. Hmmm…but I digress.
We’re getting married in August. With this union, I gain two sons. My bonus sons come in the almost grown, but absolutely awesome variety. To have the opportunity to be their mother, no matter how or when they came to me, is a blessing. My books have been rescued by a new publisher who is willing to actually partner with me in an engaged and thoughtful way. I feel excited and hopeful about actually selling books for the first time in a long time. We’re putting new covers on all eight of my book babies, and adding a little bonus piece at the end of each. I cannot wait to share them with you. I’m busy working on them as we speak. (Think deleted scenes, short stories of minor characters, Christmas stories – that kind of thing).
I’ll be announcing next week the details of my new publisher, but suffice it to say, I’m very excited.
So onward, and hopefully upward, I go. For all of you who’ve hung in here through the good and bad, both as readers and friends, thank you. I have a good feeling about this year.
It does give me pause, however, to remember how low I was at certain points in the last five years, and how impossible these kind of happy events seemed at the time. I didn’t think I could ever be this happy or feel this hopeful ever again. Yet, here I am. So, wherever you are in your journey personally and professionally, please hold onto hope. Circumstances will change. It’s never too late for a second chance. The people you’ve lost, or need to lose, will be replaced by healthy and fulfilling relationships. Working hard is never in vain. Never lose hope. Never give up.
I’m off to make Emerson’s birthday cake. Who am I kidding? I’m making Ella do it, so that it doesn’t have that big earthquake-like crater in the middle. Tonight we celebrate her birthday as a new, changed, but happy family. Cheers to all. #4kids5cats 
