Lainey’s List Chapter Twenty-Nine

 

Lainey

“Gosh, it’s good to see you.” Charlie gives me a hug at the door before I back away and let her in. It doesn’t take long for her to take in my house. It’s not much more than a sneeze of a place. Kitchen, living room, two bedrooms in the back, and one tiny bathroom with a stand-up shower.

It’s clean, though, so there’s that.

Charlie pretends like it’s not a huge step-down from the cozy duplex I rented in Dallas.

I feel compelled to tell her, “There’s a park down the street.”

She rushes to reassure me. “This place is lovely.”

“It’s a shit-hole, Charlie.”

“It’s not. It’s nice. Is this why you’ve been putting me off? Because you think I care where you live? Is that really what you think of me?” Charlie’s hurt.

“No, of course not.” Although, yes, that’s part of it. When you grow up poor and then are around people with a lot more money, you always feel the need to apologize. Sorry that everything I have isn’t shinier, newer, prettier. “You thirsty? I’ve got sweet tea or lemonade…nothing harder.”

“Sweet tea would be great. Your mom?”

“Napping. She doesn’t have a lot of energy these days. How was the drive?”

“Good. Easy once I got past I-35.”

“I don’t miss the traffic.” We share a laugh but it’s stilted. It’s not like when I was living in Dallas and we were seeing each other every day—when our lives were filled with each other. I’m torn between wanting her gone and missing her terribly.

“I thought the stuff with your mom was an excuse to get away from us.”

I look down at the table to hide my eyes from Charlie because when I moved away, it was an excuse. I came home, tail between my legs, and found my mom sick. She hadn’t told me, pride putting her in a dire position.

“How’s business?” I ask after an uncomfortable silence.

“It’s picking up. Nick,” she starts to say before clamping her mouth shut.

“You can say his name. I don’t care.” Another lie. I care a lot about hearing his name. Hearing his name from Charlie, who sees him daily, who sleeps down the hall from him, who goes to his games, who many in the online chat rooms think is his girlfriend—yeah, I’m on those. Sue me. Hearing his name from Charlie is as close as I’m going to get to hearing Nick himself. But I’m not telling her that. I don’t want her feeling more sorry for me. I don’t want Charlie’s pity.

She toys with the glass, rubbing a pattern in the condensation. “He’s having success and so other guys are thinking that I can help them. Take away all the distractions so all he has to do is focus on the game.”

“And it’s working!” I chirp with false cheeriness. It’s not that I’m not happy Nick is killing it for the Mustangs, racking up record yards both passing and running.  Or that they’re a win away from clinching a divisional title for the first time in eight years. It’s that I want to be there with him but he doesn’t want me there.

“Yeah, it’s working so well that now I’m swamped with work. I don’t have enough time in the day to do all the research I need. I can spend a week calling up schools, interviewing neighborhoods to find the exact right fit for my clients, the best dry cleaner, the best dog walkers, and then I have to fly there to visit. If I had a more established business, then it would be easier, but…”

“But you’re starting out and building your business from scratch.”

“Exactly.” Charlie reaches into her huge purse and pulls out planner after planner, all in different colors with a thousand post-it note flags sticking out of the edges.

“I’ve got all these planners and notes but feel more disorganized than ever. I want to do this so bad, Lainey.”

There’s a note of desperation in her voice. Charlie comes from a family with a lot of money. I don’t know how much but it’s substantial. Her mother is apparently a big money woman who manages huge sums of investments for some of the wealthiest people up north along with Nick’s dad. Charlie’s dad owned a construction company before he sold it to spend more time with Charlie and her mom.

So Charlie feels like she has to live up to something. Nick, too. I suppose that’s his brother’s issue. They all want to please their parents, show them what they’re worth. And for Charlie, who never went to college because of some slight brain damage when she was a kid, this is even harder.

“You can do it,” I tell her, reaching for the planners. “Talk to me. What do you need the most help with?”

“I’ve got the opportunity to move three players—two to the east coast and one on the west. I can make the travel work, but the research—I need someone I can trust. Who knows what my business is all about. All that person needs is a phone and an Internet connection, really.”

I give her a sharp look. “Did you come to visit me or offer me a job?”

“Both. Can’t it be both?” She reaches across the table and grabs my hands. “I miss you guys every day. I wish you were back in Dallas, just a drive away, but you’re not. You’re needed here and I understand and respect that but I thought you could do this here. It’d be perfect. You could work at home, be with your mom, and you wouldn’t have to spend as much money on home care.”

“You’ve given this a lot of thought.”

“You have no idea.”

“I don’t have an answer.”

“You don’t need to give one. Not today at least.”

“Good. Let me take a look at all of this. When do you need an answer by, if not today?”

“Tomorrow?” She’s only half joking. “Okay, we’re done talking about this. When does Cassidy come home?”

“Thirty minutes.”

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