Guest Blogger: Nicci Wall

Hi, my name is Nicci Wall. I am an Aussie from Geelong, Victoria (http://visitgeelongbellarine.com), a bayside regional city. I was diagnosed with Bipolar in November 2001 after 21 years of symptoms, predominately depression.

It wasn't until I progressed into agitated, rapid cycling mixed states that I was diagnosed. My family was scared of me, hell, I was scared of me and I hated the way I was, but didn't know what was causing the internal rage or why. I demanded to see a psychiatrist and on doing so my Mum finally disclosed there was Manic Depression in my maternal Grandmother's family.

It took 5 ½ years to find a medication combination that worked for me and side effects I could live with. OMG some of the side effects I experienced were worse than the illness!

When diagnosed I wasn't provided any information on Bipolar, where to find information or where to find support, so I set about educating myself through books and an online Australian Bipolar Support Group called Fyreniyce (http://members.iinet.net.au/~fractal1/). I learnt more from the real life experiences of other sufferers than I did from any book. I completed mood charts, identified triggers and implemented coping strategies obtained through reading, Julie's work, support group participants and others.

I later set up a Depression & Bipolar Support Group in my local area and started compiling the living manuscript Glimpses – A compilation of uncensored real life experiences with Mental Illness and Minds Unleashed – A collection of poetry by people with a Mental Illness. Both of which are available in pdf format for free by emailing me at forwalls@xi.com.au. I distribute these quarterly to Consumers, Carers, Dr's, Clinicians, Universities and TAFE's (it is used as a course resource), nationally and internationally.

Now 10 years down the track I am relatively stable, but continue to have breakthrough episodes, although rarely. What I do experience regularly is a pressured head, low grade headache combined with light and sound sensitivity, which in turn affects my cognitive abilities. As I am a Bookkeeper/Admin Manager, this can be extremely frustrating and disrupt my work, but I am luckier than most as I have a boss who accepts this and allows a lot of flexibility in my hours.

I have achieved a lot over the past 10 years as a Mental Health Advocate, but the most important thing I did was take responsibility for managing my illness.

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