April 31, 2011: The L.A. Breakdown: Returning on the Red Eye! A Ben & Jerry's Bonanza! Skirting the Picket Line! Dinner at Craft Restaurant!

Boy, if there was a fight on which I could have developed deep vein thrombosis, last night's red-eye from Los Angeles to Toronto was it.  I napped in about fifty five minute installments over the course of those four and a half hours, drifting off and starting awake, fingers numb, legs aching, back and neck sore.  You know what's hard?  Learning to play guitar!  You know what's even harder?  Trying to sleep sitting up!  By the time we got in at a little before 6:00 a.m. this morning, I was ready for bed.  A real bed.

But our dismebarkation would have to wait.     We taxied, rolled up to the gate, and then sat there, waiting.  One of the air hostesses informed us to remain seated with our seat belts on while an onboard issue was dealt with.  I automatically assumed it was either a medical emergency or someone was going to be arrested.  And, as our wait stretched from five, then ten, then fifteen, then twenty minutes, it became pretty obvious that it wasn't a medical emergency.  Sure enough, the door finally opened and two police officers stepped aboard.  One of the air hostesses pointed to a guy (mid-thirties, well-dressed) sitting in business class and the passenger was informed the officers were there to arrest him.  He seemed surprised, and quite flustered, as he struggled to remember where he'd secured his overhead bag and then was escorted off the flight.  By the time we hit the terminal, one of the officer had his pen and pad out, cheerily filing a report with one of the air hostesses.

I wondered what the guy had done wrong.  Smoked in the bathroom?  Argued with the cabin crew?  Swiped somebody's kosher meal?  Alas, with the heightened state of security surrounding air travel, there is zero tolerance for tomfoolery.  Also, fun.  Gone are the days when you could get super drunk, then surf the drink trolley, pantless, down the passenger aisle.  Let this be a reminder to all.

Anyway, it was a quick in and out, but much was accomplished (aka "eaten").  Here was my trip in pictures:

Sunshine is ready to go!

We flew in late Thursday night.  The next day, we went for an early morning stroll.  While Alexander opted for a mundane smoothie breakfast, I went off-book and picked up a garden burger, fries, and some Ben & Jerry's red velvet ice cream.

Alas, in the future, I think I'll stick with Cookie Dough or Haagen-Dazs Pralines and Cream. While I liked the cake bits, I wasn't a fan of the cream cheese/ice cream combo.

Look at the selection of ice cream! Ben & Jerry's alone! THIS is reason enough for me to move south! Oh, and, uh, hey there, Alex.

A car picked us up at the hotel.  The driver, apparently a huge film fan, kicked things off by asking whether we'd ever seen Once Upon A Time in the West.  Of course!  We started talking movies and he explained he was a huge fan of Hitchcock.  In fact, he was a fan of older films.  According to him, they just don't make them like they used to.  Back in the day, the emphasis was on story but, nowadays, it's nothing but mindless action.  And then, without missing a beat: "You know what movie looks good?  Fast Five!".  I stopped listening to him after that.

Eventually, we arrived at our destination and were immediately greeted the chants of what I assumed was an in progress military drill but actually turned out to be this -

Picket line!

I was relieved to learn they weren't picketing the network but the building manager that was using non-union drywall workers.  I expressed appropriate sympathy, whether it would be okay to cross the picket line.  Out of respect for the union worker of course.  And a desire to avoid being bonked on the head with an "Unfair Carpenters' Local 1506″ sign.  We go the all-clear and headed inside.

Alexander, in showrunner mode.

And there, we spent most of the day taking in the performances.

We wrapped early and, with three hours to kill, headed over a pre-dinner snack of chocolate fudge and smoothies.

Robert Cooper, relaxed.

Alexander M. Ruemelin, REALLY relaxed.

Check out this little porker. If Lulu likes short, squat beefy guys, then this little fella would be perfect.

I had my heart set on checking out Animal Restaurant – and the pig tails and pork belly sandwiches in particular – but it was booked so, on Martin Gero's recommendation, Rob booked a table for us at Craft, Top Chef Head Judge's Tom Colicchio's place.  A great call by Marty G.  Dinner was terrific:

Fisherman Carl turns his nose up at the thought of skate but on the rare occasions I spot it on a menu, I'll always order it. My sister makes a delicious caper butter version. The Craft version is equally great - buttery crisp exterior, tender meat interior, topped with a scattering of chive blossoms.

Alex raved about his flat-iron steak.

A magnificent side of sweet onions...

And sneaky-spicy shisito peppers!

The only misstep was the deep-fried headcheese which sounded great (Alex would no doubt dispute this) but ended up leaving me a queasy.

Since Rob and Alex passed on dessert, I had to pick up the slack…

Homemade chocolate chip cookies. Good, but I was missing the soft chewiness characteristic of freshly homebaked cookies.

Rich and intensely flavored homemade ice creams. From left to right: Mexican Vanilla, Pistachio, and Peanut Brittle.

While we were eating, a host of hot young actors filed past on their way to the private party being held at the back of the restaurant.  Tyler Lautner and a host of blond, spiky-haired boys everyone seemed to recognize but me.  Clearly, I need to watch more teen vampire movies.

Or, maybe Rob and Alex need to watch a whole lot less.

Tagged: Craft Restaurant