Relax

He wanted Mark physically as he had never wanted anything before, but he was convinced that Mark's chance of happiness lay in the other direction.
-Nial Kent
"The Divided Path"

Twenty-five years ago today

April 19, 1986
Saturday

Amy Platt telephoned at 9:20AM to tell me she and Karen were off to the San Leandro Marina to work on Ed's boat.
Amy added, "We're off to dinner and dancing tonight…so if you're interested."
"Okay, I'll go," I replied even though I wasn't so thrilled with the idea.
I felt like I was being too nice and didn't know how to say 'no'. That's my nature. Then again…maybe the nicer thing to do is to be honest and lay it on the line. The 'animal magnetism' just isn't there for me where she is concerned.

I am writing now at Gomes Tire Service. They're going to give me new tires and an oil filter and lube job. It's 10AM. I plan to bicycle today…

I just received the bad news. My tires are going to cost me about one-hundred dollars for each tire. That's some four-hundred odd dollars. Yuck! Oh well…it is a necessity.

During my bike ride I'm going to search out Helen and Geneva who will supposedly be clam picking at Shoreline Park on Bay Farm Island today at approximately one or two o'clock.

I plan on calling Mark Landreth, too. I hope we can get-together again tonight to do something. I'd rather go out with Mark and scope new scenery than 'tread water' with Karen, Ed and Amy. I know that sounds awful but I want Mark to be my new buddy. Then again I do have such fun with Karen, Ed and Amy. Karen is one key to a good time actually. She's so effervescent, carefree, raring to be adventurous, outspoken and ready to explore. I love all of that. And she is most of all: "unpredictable".

Amy asked, "What did you do last night?"
I replied, "Don't ask—I just went out for pizza and beer."
I didn't choose to elaborate.
Amy said, "Ed and I were dying to go out. I got ready and everything and I ended up not going out at all."
"Oh, well I feel guilty now."
Amy replied, "You should!"
I secretly felt that I did have such a good time with Mark last night though. He's so cool. One sunny Sunday we may well go to the Great America Amusement Park in Santa Clara and get drunk, go on rides, flirt around and just plain relax. Last night I explained to Mark how "RELAX" was my favorite word. Mark is now beginning to learn some of my acronyms that I've made up, too. I like Mark a lot. I want him in a special kind of way that I'm scared to admit.

Ironically, I kind of want Joyce (the gal at my gym), too. I am slowly giving up on her though.

I hope I have a good chance for this Marketing Management spot in Derek's department.

It's 11:30AM and I am still having my tires changed. They had to order them from Hayward, so it'll be a while. What a drag! My afternoon will still be available at least. I was going to procrastinate on my tire repairs. I'm glad I didn't.

I hope Mark will want to go out tonight—or at least come over to my place. When I see him I am "tempted". I have fun scouting around for the "right" chick when I am with him. That's fun. If Mark asked me to be his roommate I'd be tempted. Then again…my current surroundings are one deal that I cannot pass over. It's too good, so I don't know.
Mark had said, "I may have a small party at my house as soon as I get it all settled."
That ought to be fun. I'll admit it: I like it when just 'he and I' go out. It's just a couple of the guys out for a good time.
That was funny last night when I spoke to Mark out-of-the-blue and said, "That girl in the white half-top—with the healthy chest---her nipples are getting hard!"
Mark looked straight at her breasts but I was only joshing him. Ha-ha.

While speaking to Amy I said, "You know—my friend, Mark, could pass as your brother."
Now that I dwell on it he probably could. They're both blonds. They're both 'together' people. It's true. We meet the best people later in life. Who is next?

I got my new tires. Hurrah! They gave me new brakes (in the rear) and an oil filter and lube job as well.


I went to mom's house for a quick late breakfast and then off I went on my bicycle. I happened to run into Rick and we shared a vanilla milkshake.
Rick said, "Chad's been calling me rather frequently."
"I wonder why."
"Well, I'm helping him move tomorrow back to his mom and dad's house."
I laughed to myself. Ha-ha. I could never move back to mom and pops.
I mentioned to Rick, "Mark and I went to FANNY's last night."
I am sure Rick will mention it to Chad.


I telephoned Mark and we confirmed that we are going out to FANNY ANN's again tonight.


Suzy Miller and her brother, Mike, came over to my place. Mike Miller answered my phone and pretended to be 'me' (as I suggested). He proceeded to tell Karen and Amy that I didn't want to go out, etc.
I telephoned Karen and left a detailed message that it wasn't me they spoke to. Amy was burning with anger, thinking that was "IT".
Amy barked, "I don't need this."
I straightened it out; however, I explained that I was going out with Mark tonight and Amy got all uptight again. I know she wants to see me.
So to keep things happy I said, "Why don't you go to FAT FANNY's and meet us?"
Amy settled down and quietly said, "Okay, we may meet you there at ten-thirty or so."
I really didn't want her to go. I wanted Mark and I to have the ability to 'scope the scene', relax and have a good time. I wanted it to be 'just us guys'. So now I guess we'll see how it goes. I want Mark to be my new good buddy. He already is---in a way, I guess. I trust tonight will be daring and adventurous.


I met Mark and we went to FANNY ANN's. Amy showed up and she was actually looking very good. Amy and I danced and I had a few too many Long-Island Iced-Teas. I saw a beautiful tan girl that turned me on. Cindy Vettes was also there. She was scooping on Mike Ryan (an old Alameda High School mate that I recognized). Pebbles, the blond girl, was there also.
Mark and I have plans to go out again as Westerners at the West 40 Club and as nerds, preppies, Miami Vice dudes and punk-rockers on other nights. That ought to be fun.
I joked to Mark, "We'll probably have our best luck on dork night!"


I was kissing and mooching on Amy a lot. Mark met Cathy Knowles. She was kind of petite—but cute. We left the club at closing. Mark drove me home. I vomited in my bathroom toilet. I recalled Mark driving me to my house.
I recalled my intoxicated feeling and actually saying to Mark, "You know—you're my good buddy!"
I know I touched his leg as he was driving. I'm embarrassed about that. He was cool about it and not very reactive.
I wasn't too drunk enough to remember that I said, "Mark, you can spend the night--if you want."
He didn't spend the night though.  He left.  I slept.  It was still a fun night.

Michael found that infinite time and patience were required now in order to give his lover release, and that ordinary techniques were of no avail.  They ALL had to be discarded and new ones invented and adhered to; but once the proper formula was discovered and followed, it was joy such as he had never known...
-Nial Kent
"The Divided Path"