I do not understand teenagers who fail to rebel

My wife is right. 

I cannot understand why all teenagers and young adults don't rebel against their parents.

One example:

She tells me that a former student, now in college, is engaged to get married.

I raise my eyebrows, surprised at the age in which she has decided to tie the knot.

My wife explains that her former student is from a very devout family and takes religion quite seriously, and these people tend to marry early.

And right there she has lost me, because she's right.  I cannot understand how a young person becomes as devout about their religion as their parents, because I cannot understand why all teenagers and young adults don't rebel against their parents.

Especially in matters like religion, where time constraints and heavy-handed rules are arbitrarily imposed upon a person.

Time constraints and rules.  These seem like two of the best reasons for a teenager to rebel, and while many do, it's not all, and I just don't get it.   

You've had a couple kids and suddenly decide to take religion more seriously for the sake of your children?

I get it.  I wouldn't do it, but I get it.

You've lived a life of debauchery and hope that strict adherence to religion might save you?

I get it.  It's not for me, but I get it.

You're getting older and are worried about your potential afterlife, so you decide to convince God that you are deserving a place in Heaven by attending church regularly and becoming more devout?

I get again.  Again, I wouldn't do it, but I at least understand the motivation.

But for a sixteen year old boy or a twenty year old girl to fall in lock-step with their parents on such conservative ideals as religion?

I don't get it.

I know this a blind spot for me.  I know that many, many people embrace their parent's religious beliefs with enthusiasm and sincerity., but I can not imagine spending my teenage years embracing any of my parents conservative ideals, and I did not know a single person from that time in my life who did.

I just don't get it.  There is too much opportunity and appeal in choosing for oneself and striking out on one's own for me to ever understand why one's parents beliefs would ever become your own. 

My wife attempted to claim that she did not rebel against her parents when she was young, but less than a minute later, after I had fired off an lengthy list of acts of rebellion from her youth, even she admitted that she was probably not in lock-step with her parents as she had once imagined.

And I love this about her. 

In fact, it's one of the things I love the most about her.   

That and her acceptance of me in every way, blind spot and all. 

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Published on April 15, 2011 02:02
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