How a writer deals with rejection?
All of us face it, not just writers, but everyone. Rejection is a part of life. I'm yet to meet someone who has never met with rejection.
Yet for writers, whose work is lonely, it does zap your creative conscience. When a single acceptance can make your career, or add more pep to your next piece of work, rejection does weigh you down. Coming off the heels of three rejections this week, for both long and short works, I had a heavy dose. Enough to put a stop to my usual submission process and just sulk- which inspired me with this post.
In his book On Writing Well Stephen King mentions, he stuck all his rejection slips on a nail, until it weighed down. I was surprised to read that he didn't stop, just continued writing. So a few things to help you.
1. Sulk if you must
I don't know Stephen King, but I know myself. I'm a girlie. When I see that declined status( on submittable), I cry. Yeah you can bring out the wine and have a good, cleansing cry. I'm not sure what the guys do (let me know), but I'll cry and mope for a few hours. Give yourself some space to grieve, its only natural.
2. Shelve the project
Whatever you do, don't touch the story or piece, right now. You're too close to it, too emotional to handle it and probably the changes you make will be worse than the original. Put it away. Let it ferment.
3. Evaluate the rejection
After a day or two, read your rejection. What kind is it? Is it a form rejection, 'not for us', 'does not fit' kind? If yes, that's not so bad, they didn't like your work enough to go gaga about it. And believe me you really want them to love your work. There's a new high when an editor says, 'we loved this.' So form rejections with minor tweaking, can be resubmitted elsewhere. No harm done.
The editor that gives you specific feedback, maybe an R & R, now those are good rejections, because you know what needs to be done to make it better. Don't argue that the editor is wrong and why your perspective is right. Revising is up to you. But if they took the time to make suggestions, its likely they want your story. I remember for 'Where is Ally?' they wanted me to cut down. I had too much backstory in the beginning. The mystery was loose, there were too many characters and the story was long. I took nine months to edit the story. Yes, that long, to perfect and change it. Some people may laugh at that. But I'm not a prolific writer and I like for the draft to simmer after I've made an edit.
I don't see any 'please never send your work to me,' rejections. Editors these days are nicer people, who don't get sadistic pleasure in rejecting your work. They have to be able to justify paying you from their meager resources, for a mere 1800 words. They just want a good story.
4. Use your pain to keep writing
Not every one of us has cancer, or is going through a divorce or has a dead pet or has survived a natural calamity. Some of us are really boring people, with uninteresting lives and the pain of rejection is not frequent. So use the pain, to craft a scene or a story or paragraph, prose, post, whatever. When I get rejected, I find myself noticing the cerulean sky, the swish of the leaves and birdsong of bulbuls- alliterations I would never use on payday. So use your pain to write, trust me, the words will flow.
5. Don't fall off the wagon
If you have set a daily word count or a deadline, you're aiming for, keep at it. There's no need to completely stop writing. Keep going, if its any consolation, the piling rejections, are only evidence that you're out there, creating, drafting, submitting and revising. And if you've watched a game of football, the attacking side, that pounds the opposition over and over and over, that has shot after shot on goal, finally finds the back of the net. That's when my dad says, 'the goal is coming.'
And I couldn't agree more, rejections can mean, that the goal is coming. If you're keeping at your craft and working on it, your goal of publishing is coming. Don't give up.
6. Its not the end of the world
While rejections are painful, its not the end of the world. Its not like you've lost a kidney, or are a Syrian refugee. There are worse problems in the world. So put on some music, dance a little and get back to writing. Remember it takes only one yes, to make it.
Song on my playlist: Magic in the Air by Ahmed Chawki
Yet for writers, whose work is lonely, it does zap your creative conscience. When a single acceptance can make your career, or add more pep to your next piece of work, rejection does weigh you down. Coming off the heels of three rejections this week, for both long and short works, I had a heavy dose. Enough to put a stop to my usual submission process and just sulk- which inspired me with this post.
In his book On Writing Well Stephen King mentions, he stuck all his rejection slips on a nail, until it weighed down. I was surprised to read that he didn't stop, just continued writing. So a few things to help you.
1. Sulk if you must
I don't know Stephen King, but I know myself. I'm a girlie. When I see that declined status( on submittable), I cry. Yeah you can bring out the wine and have a good, cleansing cry. I'm not sure what the guys do (let me know), but I'll cry and mope for a few hours. Give yourself some space to grieve, its only natural.
2. Shelve the project
Whatever you do, don't touch the story or piece, right now. You're too close to it, too emotional to handle it and probably the changes you make will be worse than the original. Put it away. Let it ferment.
3. Evaluate the rejection
After a day or two, read your rejection. What kind is it? Is it a form rejection, 'not for us', 'does not fit' kind? If yes, that's not so bad, they didn't like your work enough to go gaga about it. And believe me you really want them to love your work. There's a new high when an editor says, 'we loved this.' So form rejections with minor tweaking, can be resubmitted elsewhere. No harm done.
The editor that gives you specific feedback, maybe an R & R, now those are good rejections, because you know what needs to be done to make it better. Don't argue that the editor is wrong and why your perspective is right. Revising is up to you. But if they took the time to make suggestions, its likely they want your story. I remember for 'Where is Ally?' they wanted me to cut down. I had too much backstory in the beginning. The mystery was loose, there were too many characters and the story was long. I took nine months to edit the story. Yes, that long, to perfect and change it. Some people may laugh at that. But I'm not a prolific writer and I like for the draft to simmer after I've made an edit.
I don't see any 'please never send your work to me,' rejections. Editors these days are nicer people, who don't get sadistic pleasure in rejecting your work. They have to be able to justify paying you from their meager resources, for a mere 1800 words. They just want a good story.
4. Use your pain to keep writing
Not every one of us has cancer, or is going through a divorce or has a dead pet or has survived a natural calamity. Some of us are really boring people, with uninteresting lives and the pain of rejection is not frequent. So use the pain, to craft a scene or a story or paragraph, prose, post, whatever. When I get rejected, I find myself noticing the cerulean sky, the swish of the leaves and birdsong of bulbuls- alliterations I would never use on payday. So use your pain to write, trust me, the words will flow.
5. Don't fall off the wagon
If you have set a daily word count or a deadline, you're aiming for, keep at it. There's no need to completely stop writing. Keep going, if its any consolation, the piling rejections, are only evidence that you're out there, creating, drafting, submitting and revising. And if you've watched a game of football, the attacking side, that pounds the opposition over and over and over, that has shot after shot on goal, finally finds the back of the net. That's when my dad says, 'the goal is coming.'
And I couldn't agree more, rejections can mean, that the goal is coming. If you're keeping at your craft and working on it, your goal of publishing is coming. Don't give up.
6. Its not the end of the world
While rejections are painful, its not the end of the world. Its not like you've lost a kidney, or are a Syrian refugee. There are worse problems in the world. So put on some music, dance a little and get back to writing. Remember it takes only one yes, to make it.
Song on my playlist: Magic in the Air by Ahmed Chawki
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