War

Wars are funny

when you think about it –

 

I mean,

you’re basically just

stabbing your neighbour in the face

with a bayonet,

because some guy you never met

decided his gods were better

than your gods.

 

Listen,

I understand World War II

because the Germans killed the Jews

in their tiny rooms,

and as a citizen of the world,

you can’t ignore this persecution.

 

World War I

had something to do with inflation

and the assassination

of some archduke,

or maybe a pop group.

 

World War III

will be fraught

with danger;

World War IV

will be fought

with sticks

and stones.

 

World War V

will be fine

‘cause there’ll be no-one alive

to fight it.