The Man Who Studied 1,000 Deaths to Learn How to Live
“The small things ain’t so small.” – BJ Miller
At the end of our lives, what do we most wish for? And how can knowing this help you live better lives now?
BJ Miller (@zenhospice), MD, knows.
BJ is a palliative care physician at Zen Hospice Project in San Francisco, where he thinks deeply about how to create a dignified, graceful end of life for his patients.
He is an expert in death, but he’s also learned how we can dramatically improve our own lives, often with very small changes. When you consider that he has guided or been involved with ~1,000 deaths, it’s not surprising that he’s spotted patterns we can all learn from.
BJ is also a triple amputee, and his 2015 TED Talk, “Not Whether But How,” is a moving reflection on his vision to make empathic end-of-life care available to all, ranked among the top-15 most viewed TED talks of the year.
If you want to know what being around death can teach you about living, you’ll want to listen to this.
I LOVED this conversation, and I hope you do as well. Enjoy!
Listen to it on iTunes.
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Want to hear another podcast that challenges conventional medical doctrine? — Listen to my conversation with Adam Gazzaley. In this episode, we discuss building a video game to rewire the brain, the crossroads of hallucinogens, neuroscience and more (stream below or right-click here to download):
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QUESTION(S) OF THE DAY: What are some of the “small changes” you can make that will have a big impact on your life? Please let me know in the comments.
Scroll below for links and show notes…
Selected Links from the Episode
Princeton Alumni Weekly on the work of BJ Miller
Listen to my conversation with Adam Gazzaley
Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach
Learn more about BJ’s close friend, Justin Burke
Read The New Yorker article The Trip Treatment by Michael Pollan
Learn more about the RiverstyxFoundation
Learn more about the Heffter Research Institute, which is researching entheogen compounds
Learn more about compasspathways.org, which is researching mental health
Learn more about Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies (MAPS)
Read Vonnegut’s letter describing why he goes out to purchase envelopes
Waiting for Guffman directed by Christopher Guest
Kentucky Fried Movie directed by John Landis
Grizzly Man by Werner Herzog
In San Francisco? Visit Scuderia
Learn more about Joseph Swan Winery
Learn more about Symptom Management Service at the UCSF Cancer Management Center and Michael Rabow
Learn more about the Hospice Action Network
Connect with BJ Miller and Zen Hospice:
ZenHospice.org | Facebook | Twitter
Show Notes
How do you answer the questions, “What do you do?” [7:43]
What does the first meeting look like for a new patient at the Zen Hospice Project? [9:22]
Defining palliative care [11:14]
What happens when a patient dies in Zen Hospice compared to a regular hospital? [15:24]
How many deaths have you experienced? [20:07]
What has observing hundreds of deaths taught you about living? [20:42]
On keeping a mindfulness or meditation practice [28:51]
About the Dinky (a terrifying story of electrocution) [31:06]
The Snowball Story [41:49]
BJ Miller’s experience as an undergraduate student at Princeton [45:27]
On the idea of art [46:33]
How BJ Miller would support someone who suffered injuries similar to his own [53:29]
What helps people most in hospice care [56:30]
Why cookies matter [1:01:11]
Thoughts on the use of psychoactive compounds in end-of-life care and treating existential suffering [1:04:48]
BJ Miller’s secret habit that might surprise most people [1:14:40]
Suggested material for an introverted hospice patient [1:19:48]
What do you think of when you think of the word “successful?” [1:26:55]
Daily practices for seeing good in people [1:30:43]
How to ride a motorcycle when missing three limbs [1:33:39]
What purchase of $100 or less has most positively affected your life? [1:38:10]
If you could have one billboard anywhere, what would it say and why? [1:40:06]
Advice to your thirty-year-old-self [1:41:42]
What have you changed your mind about in the last few years? [1:43:37]
BJ Miller’s requests/asks/suggestions of the audience [1:45:23]
People Mentioned
Adam Gazzaley
Mark Rothko
Jackson Pollock
Kurt Vonnegut
Ludwig van Beethoven
Oprah Winfrey
Deepak Chopra
Mert Lawwill
