The friend who assumes you've read every one of their tweets or Facebook status updates.

The Internet has introduced lots of new people we need to be kind to. Although "love your neighbor," didn't specifically mention people you follow on Twitter or friend on Facebook, I have to assume that command was inclusive of "digital neighbors" as well.


One of the people I have the hardest time with is the "Friend who assumes you've read every one of their tweets or Facebook status updates."


I have a hard time with this person because I'm usually the one who does this to my friends. Here's what our conversations look like:


Me: I did end up seeing that movie.


Friend: What are you talking about?


Me: Remember, that movie I tweeted about? I ended up renting it. Did you agree with how I felt it ended?


Friend: I'm still not sure what you're talking about.


Me: Seriously? A week ago I tweeted: "I thought Social Network was good. Great dialogue. It felt like it didn't finish though, it just ended but that's challenge of a live story." Are you pulling my leg right now, or do you really not remember my tweet?


Friend: I've been really busy. With life. And the living of it. And not writing down each of your tweets or status updates in my diary. Plus, you tweeted 24 times during the Grammy's. You're tweets do not complete me, they completely overwhelm me.


Me: I bet Scott Baio's friends don't treat him this way.


Friend: What does that even mean?


Me: No big deal. Fine. Whatever. I guess I just thought we were friends. I thought like they say at church that we were "doing life together."


Friend: Oh stop. Don't be so dramatic.


Me: I'll get over it. I'll write something sarcastic about this whole situation in the last place you'll think to find it. Twitter or Facebook.


Friend: You know who reads all your tweets? Jesus.


Me: Did you just Jesus Juke me?


Isn't that exhausting? I think so and I'm the one who usually has these conversations if not out loud then definitely in my head when a friend reveals they haven't been keeping tracking of my life via Facebook or Twitter.


Do you have any friends like that? Who assume you follow their life like it's a live news feed or incredibly pertinent information?


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Published on March 01, 2011 06:15
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