Regarding Tumblr’s Message/Chat Function Thingy

I’ve received a handful of messages from tumblr users I don’t know that say “hi.” Nothing more, nothing less. And literally, all of them say this, not a variation of it, but just that one word. It happens frequently.

I’ve reached out to a few of these people to see why they took the time to message me and offer that one greeting with no other signified purpose or goal. Invariably, the conversation goes one of two ways:

Further coy purposeless statements (like, “What’s up?” or “Nothing, just saying hi.”)
Flirting

Both of these cause me to jettison the exchange faster than a #BlackLivesMatter protester getting ejected from a Trump rally.

Now, I’m all for the freedom to randomly tell an e-stranger “hi.” It could lead to a cool conversation or a friendship or whatever. But, if you’re the one initiating the conversation, don’t expect me to do the heavy-lifting.

You reached out to me. Wanna talk? Let’s talk. Tell me what you want to discuss and why. Get to the point. I’m a parent, I’ve got shit to do. 

Oh, and the second most frequent type of message I get from strangers is some version of “promote my blog,” to which I almost universally reply “LOL, nope.” Don’t ask me to promote your site, show me why I should. Make good content, have a voice, and most importantly…

This has been a message from an angry old man who’s been on tumblr almost since day one. Disagree? Feel free to tell me to fuck off. At least that’ll be different than “hi.”