Feedback Friday :: Focus

editors pitched :: 4

commissions :: 2

hours of training :: 30

ongoing commissions/projects :: 4

English lessons taught :: 4

new students gained :: 1

weight to shed :: 11 pounds

physical exercise :: 2 runs around the common

metaphysical exercise :: 2 very short spells of meditation, but it’s a start

week 8/52 overall rating :: 7.5/10

…

It’s been a busy week. I’ve been getting up at 6 every day and going to bed around 10. Some primitive, ignorant part of my brain tells me I’m missing out on something by going to bed so early, but I know that I’m not. On the contrary, I’ve got much more done this week than I have for a very long time. I admit, I kind of want to go on a two-day bender now and drown myself in booze and drugs and illicit flesh. But instead I shall go for a run, eat lots of salad and learn to touch-type.

A couple of months of hard work and focus is not a lot to ask. I’m trying to turn my life around. I’m trying to get responsible. Get off my back. Monkey.

I’ve also decided (I think) to move to Amsterdam in June. I say ‘I think’ because it’s difficult to know when an idea turns from a vague desire to a nagging desire to a confirmed decision. I know that I’ve wanted to live in Amsterdam since I first went there around 20 years ago.

So far, I’ve been to Amsterdam three times. One with a paranoid schizophrenic (my diagnosis), once with a girlfriend in the first flush of infatuation, and once by myself on a day trip from Antwerp during the ill-fated festival project. And I know that every time I go, I think how much I would like to live there.

Now that it’s come into my head again, I can think of absolutely no reason not to try and make it happen.

It’s also something else to focus on. And focus is good. Focus is what I need.

So.

On I get.

Good weekend to you.

Filed under: FEEDBACK, REAL LIFE Tagged: Amsterdam, focus