8 Things You Should NEVER Let Your Human Do

I recently saw a post on PetMD called “8 Things You Should NEVER Do to Your Cat,” and I realized that we kitties could use some instruction too. It’s not like caring for humans is something we cats do instinctively. Well, it is, but there is always room for improvement. So here you go! I have 8 things too.

Never allow your human to…

Oversleep! Humans do best when they are on a regular schedule, and that includes getting up at a certain time every day. They are not always great judges at determining that time, so it is up to us kitties to let them know when it is. What a funny coincidence that this happens to coincide with our preferred breakfast time!
Leave the house without some sort of feline ID on her clothing. It is important that other cats know that your human belongs to you, and that they should keep their paws off. So always make sure there is some cat hair on your human’s outfit when she goes to work, goes shopping, and especially when she is volunteering at a cat rescue. If for some reason, this is difficult to do (for example, if she owns several dozen lint rollers), then at least rub all over her to make sure that every inch of her smells like you.
Make food in the kitchen unsupervised. Cooking is hard, and even putting together a sandwich can be complicated, so your human will probably need some help in order to do it right. Always stay close to them while they are preparing food of any sort. Besides, sometimes they are clumsy and you may wind up with a surprise treat!
Bring anything into your home without thoroughly inspecting it. For many humans, shopping is an enjoyable pastime, and sometimes they forget themselves and bring home something that’s frivolous at best or ridiculous at worst. So it is up to us kitties to examine any new purchases and decide whether they should stay, or go in the trash.
Eat alone. It is not healthy for humans to eat by themselves. In fact, it could make them depressed. So give them some kitty company to keep their spirits up! If you are part of a human family that eats together, it is still important to be part of mealtime — after all, as a family member, it would be rude of you to not be there.
Watch TV by themselves. You don’t want your human to become a hermit, do you? That’s just plain not healthy emotionally for a human, so you had better sit on the couch next to her while she watches her favorite shows — especially if she is snacking while she is watching. Then you can make sure she isn’t overeating by taking some of the food yourself.
Pack for a trip guilt free. If your human is going away and you have to stay at home, that is totally not fair and she needs to reminded of that. So climb into the suitcase, look sad and, if all else fails, run around the house and cause trouble (the latter is Binga’s favorite tactic). If you work hard enough at making her feel bad, maybe she will come home early!
Ever forget that kitties know best… because we do!

* * *

My 2016 calendars are here!