Molly Davis's Blog, page 22
February 27, 2020
End Of Story
For your Friday reflection…
What is one old story no longer worth telling?
Photo: Nita on Pexels.com
February 26, 2020
The Fill-In-The-Blank Calendar
Every year I purchase the same big wall calendar, not because I have a good use for it, but because I love how it looks. Simple craft paper pages with big squares, it looks great on my wall, and, up until now, has essentially been useless. This year, all of that changed.
Over morning coffee recently, Tom and I were talking about not only the year ahead, but the years ahead, and how to be good stewards of our time, and, of our relationship. Because we have a lot of people that we love, and places in which to put our time, energy and gifts to use, if not careful, we would find ourselves with only the crumbs left for us as a couple. That’s when I understood exactly how to use that wall calendar. It is now officially known as our This Is Us Calendar. The only things on there are those that we plan for the two of us.
It is a visual reminder of the priority we want, and need, to place on our relationship. When that gets neglected, everything goes to hell in a hand basket real fast.
Not everyone needs a This Is Us Calendar, but everybody needs a Fill-In-The-Blank Calendar.
What’s yours?
February 25, 2020
Old Glory
Today I ordered a new flag pole so that we can hang our faded-but-still-symbolic American flag. The old pole is bent and no longer in good working order, kind of like our country. Time to provide a stronger staff on which to hang Old Glory.
Election season is upon us, and as is true in any neighborhood, town, or city across this beautiful, broken country of ours, the way we will cast our votes will not be the same as that of all of our neighbors. And while I deeply care about who others vote for, I care even more that we all care enough to show up and have an informed say in the state of our union.
February 24, 2020
Worth The Price
~ Susan David
February 23, 2020
Let's Do It
If I were to stand on the street corner with a sign, it would say:
Do Your WorkWe all have work to do if we are going to become the best version of ourselves, and whatever it takes to do that, it’s worth doing.
Photo: Pexels.com
February 22, 2020
Lost In Translation
A sign of wisdom is not believing everything you think. A sign of emotional intelligence is not internalizing everything you feel. Thoughts and emotions are possibilities to entertain, not certainties to take for granted. Question them before you accept them.
Have you ever had the experience of listening to another person, usually someone close to you, and hearing one thing only to find out that they were saying something completely different?
Me too.
All.
The.
Time.
It’s like we have a private internal app that converts what someone else says into a different language entirely. A language that we are so familiar with that we don’t think to question it. We simply believe that what we heard is what they meant to say. They meant to judge us, criticize us, correct us, or hurt our feelings, and then we respond accordingly by reacting, defending, retreating, or any number of personal protective mechanisms. At that point, their internal translation app (because we all have one) kicks into gear and converts our response into their internal language. In other words, no pun intended, a lot can get lost in translation.
It’s a crazy, self-perpetuated, vicious cycle that can only be stopped when we are willing to consider that what we heard isn’t necessarily what they said, and then have the courage to go find out.
Photo: Pexels.com
February 21, 2020
You Could
Strapping on my snow shoes outside of Timberline Lodge to head out on my own, I was musing on where to go. Tom, busy getting his skis on to spend a few hours on the slopes, said, You could climb to Silcox Hut.
What?
Silcox Hut is a small rustic lodge nestled into the flanks of Mt. Hood. It sits at about 7000 ft, and to get there from the Lodge means trekking straight uphill for little over a mile while gaining 1000 ft of elevation in the process.
Tom headed for the chair lift, and I headed for the official, mostly flat, snow shoe trail, not intending to head up the steep slope that would get me to Silcox Hut.
The thing is though, I’ve always wanted to see it up close and personal.
After a few steps on the trail, I let me gaze settle on the roof line of the hut way, way, way up the hill, which is when it began to sink in.
I could climb to Silcox Hut.
I could climb to Silcox Hut.
I could climb to Silcox Hut.
With that thought, I set out to do something I’d wanted to do for a long, long time, discovering a few key things along the way:
Make a decision. The first step to accomplishing that long-held desire was to decide to go there. I even said it out loud to no one but me, and maybe God. “I am going to climb to Silcox Hut.” When we give voice to something we could do, we are one giant step closer to actually doing it.
Set milestones. There were trail markers all the way up the slope. Looking up the mountain, I’d pick one as my next resting spot. Sometimes I’d go farther, but I never stopped before at least reaching my next goal. Breaking things up into pieces keeps us moving in the right direction.
Take note of how far you’ve come. Every time I stopped to rest, my gaze would naturally go to how much farther I had to go, and how much steeper the slope seemed to be getting with every step. It made all the difference to look back over my shoulder and take in the distance I had already covered. The antidote to giving up is to remember how far we’ve come.
Linger at the top. Rather than turn around and head back down, I lingered at the top, soaking in the feeling of accomplishment, and the way my lungs and muscles felt for having worked hard on my behalf. The pleasure derived from doing something we set out to do stays with us, reminding us to keep going, even when the going gets tough.
Is there something you’ve long wanted to do?
Well.
You could.
Silcox Hut: Mt. Hood
February 20, 2020
The Backstory
Lately I’ve been catching myself making assumptions about other people. Looking through the lens of how I see the world, I make my mind up about how they see the world, and proceed accordingly. I’m realizing that I’m missing something important: the backstory
According to wikipedia, the backstory as a literary device provides the background leading up to the present plot. In acting is is the behind the scenes history of a character to help the actor better understand the role they are playing.
Every one of us has a backstory. Experiences that shape who we are today. Personal histories that influence what we believe, what we value, and how we behave.
Before jumping to conclusions about one another, let’s remember that there is always a backstory. And until we know what it is, we don’t have the whole story.
Photo: Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas on Pexels
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February 19, 2020
The Road Trip
We’ve been talking about it for months. The first serious cross-country road trip that is just for the two of us. The dates are on our calendar, and we even pulled the trigger on purchasing the newest car we’ve ever owned with this particular trip in mind.
Sitting down with a glass of wine, notebook, calendar, and a US Map, we started to chart our course. At one point I put down my pen and looked at what I’d written based on our possible stops. It didn’t look like the trip I’d been imagining in my head. Too much push to get too many places, not enough time to pause and enjoy where we might find ourselves. I still wanted to take the trip. Just not this one.
We stopped plotting our route and started talking about what we wanted out of the experience. What were the most important elements for each of us? Which ones did we share and where did we differ? The process made us remember something one of our therapists told us years ago. If she were sitting with us at that table, she would remind us, again, that it doesn’t really matter where we go, where we stay, or how long we are gone. What matters is when we get home and unpack, is our relationship better for having gone, or not.
Could we be more excited about heading down the road together?
No.
Are we in agreement on what it will look like?
Absolutely not.
At least not yet.
But we will be.
Our trip is a work in progress, just like we are.
Photo: Elements 5 Digital on Pexels
February 18, 2020
Green-Screening Your Life
This morning I texted good friends a photo of us from our snowshoeing adventure on the flanks of Mt. Hood. It was a glorious Pacific NW day, with brilliant blue skies, blazing sunshine, and Wy-East, as he is known to our Native American sisters and brothers, was out in all his glory. It was the kind of day that takes your breath away and reminds you of how amazing it is to be alive, and I wanted to share it.
Almost immediately a text came zooming back.
That’s some impressive green screen work...
