Ashe Vernon's Blog, page 120

"I am trying to put a pin in this.I am trying to call this finished, orover, orsomething we are on..."

“I am trying to put a pin in this.

I am trying to call this finished, or

over, or

something we are on the other side of.

But it’s hard finding closure when you’re standing

in front of a door you never opened.

See, you can’t finish a race if you’re still

standing, bashful, at the starting line.

I wonder

how many months we’ve already spent

watching each other fall in and out of love

with other people.

I wonder

if I’m meant to spend a lifetime

asking god about your mouth.

This boy is not my answer

to the question we never ask each other.

No matter what anyone says,

I’m not looking for you, in him.

He is not the echo of your hands;

he looks nothing like your ghost.

I could fall in love with him and

it would have nothing to do with you–

just like the boy who broke your heart

had nothing to do with me.

I shouldn’t have to apologize

for the state we find ourselves in, and yet

I catch myself dusting my own heart

for fingerprints, for motive,

for evidence of a crime.

So this is what it is to be in love at a distance:

measured in miles,

measured in time-zones,

measured in how often I’ve thought

about my hands and your hands and

your hips and my thighs,

measured in how high we can stack

the fear, the denial, the regret.

I guess this is us finding out the hard way

that a hundred thousand maybes

aren’t worth a single fucking

yes.”

- THE ONE I DON’T WANT YOU TO READ by Ashe Vernon

8, 9, 21, 35

8 - answered!

9: What was your biggest failure?


I acted selfishly and fucked up a friendship pretty badly. We’re doing okay, now, but it was definitely a huge personal failure, for me. I make it a point to try and treat the people around me well and I messed up.

21: Did you fall in love in 2015?


Probably. Probably more than once. I fall in love so easily. I fall in love all the time.

35 - answered!

8 19 and 31???

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?


I’VE DONE A LOT OF REALLY AMAZING THINGS THAT I’M PROUD OF, THIS YEAR!! I published my second book! I went on tour!! I graduated college!!!

19: What do you wish you’d done less of?


Chasing after people who hurt me. Letting fear dictate my actions.

31 - answered

8 19 and 31???

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?


I’VE DONE A LOT OF REALLY AMAZING THINGS THAT I’M PROUD OF, THIS YEAR!! I published my second book! I went on tour!! I graduated college!!!

19: What do you wish you’d done less of?


Chasing after people who hurt me. Letting fear dictate my actions.

31 - answered

8 19 and 31???

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?


I’VE DONE A LOT OF REALLY AMAZING THINGS THAT I’M PROUD OF, THIS YEAR!! I published my second book! I went on tour!! I graduated college!!!

19: What do you wish you’d done less of?


Chasing after people who hurt me. Letting fear dictate my actions.

31 - answered

30-35

30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2015?
Danger Cupcake meets Man-Eater

31: What kept you sane?
Jordan motherfucking Hamilton ( @workingonhumble ) aka the only reason I survived this ridiculous fucking year. I met him at the start of 2015, but it feels like it’s been a lifetime. Thank you, for being an anchor and my best friend.

32: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Probably Halsey tbh

33: What political issue stirred you the most?
God, there’s been so much this year. There was so much racial injustice and so many deaths and none of them saw the justice they deserved.

34: Who did you miss?
Jordan and Molly ( @sexdrugsandantiquesroadshow ), mostly.

35: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2015.


You can’t make someone love you. You can put all the love in the world into a person and get none of it back. It’s okay not to pour your heart into people who give you nothing in return.

11, 16, 26, 36. :)

11: What was the best thing you bought?


This year I started being really conscientious about my skin care and those purchases have, hands down, been the best thing I’ve gotten for myself.

16: What song will always remind you of 2015?


Uptown Funk, probably.
…
that came out this year, right?
right???

26: What did you want and get?


I wanted our tour to be successful and I really feel like it was–especially since we’re in the process of booking round two.

36: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.


Idk if this really sums up my year or not but this song has been giving me feelings all day:
“Everything stays, right where you left it. Everything stays, but it still changes ever so slightly, daily and nightly, in little ways, when everything stays.”

So I reblogged that numbers thing bUT I don’t get off work for another hour. I promise to...

So I reblogged that numbers thing bUT I don’t get off work for another hour. I promise to answer them when I get home

NUMBERS IN ASK ~ Looking back on 2015, WHO ARE YOU?

merryhaymitch:

1: What did you do in 2015 that you’d never done before?
2: Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
3: Did anyone close to you give birth?
4: Did anyone close to you die?
5: What countries did you visit?
6: What would you like to have in 2016 that you lacked in 2015?
7: What dates from 2015 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?
9: What was your biggest failure?
10: Did you suffer illness or injury?
11: What was the best thing you bought?
12: Whose behaviour merited celebration?
13: Whose behaviour made you appalled?
14: Where did most of your money go?
15: What did you get really, really, really excited about?
16: What song will always remind you of 2015?
17: Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? © richer or poorer?
18: What do you wish you’d done more of?
19: What do you wish you’d done less of?
20: How did you spend Christmas?
21: Did you fall in love in 2015?
22: What was your favourite TV program?
23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
24: What was the best book you read?
25: What was your greatest musical discovery?
26: What did you want and get?
27: What did you want and not get?
28: What was your favourite film of this year?
29: What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2015?
31: What kept you sane?
32: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
33: What political issue stirred you the most?
34: Who did you miss?
35: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2015.
36: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

DO IT

I am curious and you must know... what's the difference between pansexuals and bisexuals? (I don't want to sound like illiterate rubbish, I just really care)

So I would highly recommend you do some research into this and not just take my word as gospel, because there are a lot of different opinions within the queer/polysexual community about this, and I am just one person, but here’s how I try to explain it:

Bisexual people are attracted to people of the same and other genders. Exactly which genders are included in this attraction is going to vary based on the person.

Pansexual people are attracted to people regardless of gender. Meaning that gender doesn’t factor into attraction at all.

So, for me, gender has nothing to do with whether or not I’m attracted to someone. It’s like hair color. I see it, I recognize it, but I’m not going to avoid romantic/sexual interest in someone just because they’re blonde, you know?