Jim Hodgson's Blog, page 6

Bobby Nash and the Misadventures of Dick the Dog

[image error]Bobby Nash is an award-winning writer from the wilds of Georgia and I can tell you, having been around him in person, he’s every bit as much fun in person as he is on this episode.

I had some technical problems with recording this one, plus some brain problems telling Bobby when exactly it would air, but Mr. Nash himself had not one iota of problems outlining a story from scratch.

Check him out here: http://bobbynash.com

Also! Stop by Amazon and check out my book Santa vs. Krampus. Now in audio format for your ear holes!

Thanks for listening!

10 Character Names for Romance Novels

[image error]You may use these in your work, if you like. All I ask is a walk-on role in the eventual movie adaptation.

Jack Hardcliffe
Torn Abripple
Cord McShoulders
Mason Huntington
Sean O’Commitment
Janice Faintsaway
Fen Waypark
Esmerelda Richnpouty
Burt Larch
Nancy Fantzeigh-Pantci

I’ll read work at WONDERBOOK on Saturday

I started wishing there was a small, laid-back literary event that I could go to with a bunch of my local writer pals. Unfortunately, there wasn’t anything like that to be had so I had to make it myself. I present WONDERBOOK!

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On Saturday (Sept. 30th) we will take over Wondershop, the coworking space in Candler Park. It’s going to be a relaxed hang-out with some great writers. There will be baked goods on hand plus used books for sale. Facebook event link here: https://www.facebook.com/events/861539410663038/

Candler Park fest will be going on just down the street so we expect lots of foot traffic. I’m planning to read a little of Santa vs Krampus. The other authors also will read some work if they feel like it.

I hope you’ll stop in and say hello!

16 – Editor Garrett Marco and Dear Leader

[image error]Garrett puts me in the hot seat when he’s editing my work, so it’s only fair I should get to force him to come up with a novel idea on the spot, right? Right!

Today is that day, my friends! He edited Heart’s Racing and Ten Thousand Gods for me and did excellent work. I owe him much.

Find Garrett’s fine editing services at http://marcoediting.com/. Thanks for listening!

How to Make A Decent Author WordPress Template Maybe

[image error]WordPress is like a robot companion who fights alongside you, facilitates your livelihood, but also might explode into a cloud of fart gas and flying turds at any moment. You might be wondering: “How the hell did that robot get so full of organic fecal matter?” Sorry. That information is proprietary.

The fact is, though, WP is still the best. Authors need the dynamic ability of a framework like WordPress, even if that means a flying plop from time to time. Is it flatus? Just a touch.

It’s unfortunate that our products (paper books, kindle, etc.) are arranged in what a painter would call “portrait mode,” rather than the much more internet-friendly “landscape,” but books are older and better so fuck you, computers.

A Book Sellers Theme

I started chasing the idea of a portfolio-style home page when I saw Chuck Wendig’s web site some years ago. (I call him Chucky Wendy.) I hunted around in his source code to find the name of it, bought it, and used it for years myself.

Chucky Wendy’s theme is called “Yin and Yang.” It’s on Envato here.

[image error]There are a couple of things I like about this theme. Overall I think the design is great, but it’s not really made for authors. As you can see, the portfolio images are landscape orientation, so you can’t see all of the book cover unless you click on the whole thing. That’s not ideal.

Another thing I don’t like is that clicking on the book image takes you to a page on your web site where you are obliged to describe your book to your reader in hopes that they’ll click yet again to be taken to Amazon or Kobo or Honest Bobs Sweet-Ass Book Hut.

The path to purchase is too long here.

Warning: Sales Douche Talk Ahead

[image error]I wish I could just write books and have checks appear, but since I’m a one-man operation — with the love and support of my wife and family, of course — I have to do everything: writing, marketing, and sales.

I want my path to purchase to be as short as possible. If I can entice a potential reader to click on the image of my book — ಠ__ಠ — I want them to get to the “buy” button before they think, “Wait, I’ve never heard of this guy. Humorous Fantasy and Science fiction? What the butts?!”

I also don’t want to confuse potential readers by making them wonder if they should buy my book on Kobo, nor do I want to make them laugh out loud by suggesting that they’d buy books at a Barnes and Noble.

Amazon’s page for my book is ideal. The Createspace paperback, Kindle version, and Audible versions are all right there and I don’t have to maintain a blurb on my website in addition to the one I already rewrite occasionally on Amazon.

Enter the Amazon Link Builder plugin.

I hate plugins!

Yeah. Plugins suck. Sure, they add features to WordPress. Features like “unexplained crashing” and “security vulnerabilities.” But this one is written by Amazon and my little red wagon is, for good or ill, hitched right to that star. Might as well ride on.

My theme is called Snaps, which is free for download here, but the home page content is made using Amazon Link Builder.

Once you’ve installed Amazon Link Builder you’ll have to hook it up to your Amazon Associates account for it to work. Note that you can’t transmit associate links in an offline manner, so no podcasts and no emails. But that isn’t a problem for my home page.

The Amazon Link Builder adds this button to page/post editing screen.

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If you play around with that, you’ll see you have a few options for how to display your books. I made a custom template for mine that removed the price stuff and just showed the books cover. Here’s what my template looks like on Pastebin:

And here’s the CSS to go with it:

This creates a workable gallery of my book images that take clickers straight to Amazon. If those people buy something, I get a few cents as an associate. It’s not much money, but then, I’m a professional writer so I’m not really in a position to leave pennies lying around.

That’s it for the book section of my home page. Below that is a list of my latest posts using a shortcode generated by the Ultimate Post List widget. Easy peasy.

Hey! I hope this helps you.

15 – Paul Dale and Future Cost

The Dark Lord's Handbook (Volume 1)




Price: $13.49









Special miniguest this week, the Girl Child makes an appearance while waiting for the bus. Our actual guest is Paul Dale, author of the amazing Dark Lord’s Handbook.

I love Dark Lord’s Handbook because it has such a reverence for fantasy tropes even as it is defying them or turning them on their heads. It’s a tough line to walk but Paul Dale handles it with great skill. If you’re into any kind of humorous fantasy I can guarantee you this is a book to read immediately.

Paul and I are both cyclists but, for the sake of the listener, we agreed not to discuss bikes for fear of boring you senseless. You’re welcome.

Find Paul Dale on his site here: http://www.pauladdale.co.uk/

And on Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Paul-Dale/e/B0075CK60K/

Thanks for listening!

15 Names for Science Fiction/Fantasy Characters

[image error]Feel free to use these in your work if you like. You don’t have to credit me if you do, but I’d love to hear about it. Also, I want a walk-on role in your TV/movie adaptation.

Tarn Bwango
Debbil Flot
Scinious the Vile
Soup Clatter
Bowneedle
Zekchiff Ustle
Futsie Canwhistle
Duntson MacGibbon
Shedley Farson Feltree
Dupp
Salubrious Cheddar
Missie Emstein
Slam Chockrock
Becky “Beck the Wreck” Wreckler
Phil Boot

14 – Rhonda Parrish and Serial Killer Pizza

[image error]Rhonda Parrish is a shapeshifter with talents to match her every incarnation- magpie tenacity for picking the shiniest submissions, nightingale notes for crafting tales, and bright, feline eyes for seeking out her photographic subjects. She balances on the knife-edge of darkness and light, a sorceress of both realms.

Find her on the web here: http://www.rhondaparrish.com/

On Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Rhonda-Parrish/e/B00IN688KC

I had a ball talking to Rhonda and appreciate her appearing on the podcast, especially since she’s super busy right now trying to put together an anthology of short stories.

She claims to be someone who doesn’t outline, but she nailed it anyway!

Yes You Can Be Like Me, A Competitive Professional Zip Liner

[image error]I would say the best thing about being on the cutting-edge of a developing sport is that a lot of the stuff I’m coming up with now will have whatever name I give it forever. You know, like Tony Hawk and the 900.

These days on the pro zip lining circuit we’re seeing the Purple Dangler, the Cat Scratch Feeler, Woozy Bandits, Forceful Bummers, Bone Drafts, 720 Nut Lathe. I heard Skye Tanner’s working on a Dipping Wick into a Toot Your Horn and her local line is only 100 meters long, so… I can’t wait to see that if she can pull it off. We’re at that level where it’s almost not, like, a competition anymore between us. We just try to learn from and be fueled by one another.

Obviously, we both want to win super bad though and we’re great competitors too, though, totally.

One of the moves I’m working on now; damn I can only think of like three lines in the world long enough for me to complete the whole thing. It’s really mind-blowing, you know? When you get to this level of competitive professional zip lining?

It’s not at all too late for you to get into this stuff. In fact, I welcome the competition. CrossFit people, gymnasts, martial arts people… Anyone with good mobility and high athleticism can learn to be a professional zip liner. If you work hard you might even be able to go pro like I did.

For me, it all started back in college when I was running the canopy tour at Big Walking in the Shenandoah valley. It’s crazy that I got my start in the Eastern U.S. like that because we just don’t have the big lines where I’m from like they do around Boulder where I live now. Humble beginnings, right?

Of course, I started on the line like any other kid: turning upside down, doing the Spider Man, then the Reverse Spider Man. I thought I was hot shit. Then I saw a kid pull off a Double Dutch into a Flippy Whisker and I lost my mind. Once I saw that I knew anything was possible.

If you don’t have a competition going near you — hey! — start one. Talk to someone with a line, organize a date, and throw up a flyer. If I’m in the area, the prize money’s right, and it fits my training schedule, I might just come by and show you how the big boys do it in competitive professional zip lining.

New Book available for Pre-order: How to Mount Kilimanjaro

[image error][image error]I am pleased to announce that I have a new non-fiction work up for pre-order: How to Mount Kilimanjaro, a mostly serious guide to climbing Africa’s highest mountain.

Find it here on Amazon (or the image at right): How To Mount Kilimanjaro: A Mostly Serious Guide to Climbing Africa’s Highest Mountain (Mostly Serious Guides)[image error]

I’ve taken a little break from working on fiction to do some non-fiction work and it’s been great. Each recharges the other, I find. Is it okay to love both? Don’t answer that. I don’t care. I’m having fun.

When I wrote my guide on Aconcagua[image error] years ago, I did it for fun. It was a surprise to me when that book became one of the highest-reviewed and most-bought books on Amazon for people considering an Aconcagua climb. I’m hoping I can prove useful again with this book on Kilimanjaro.

If you’re considering a Kilimanjaro attempt, I think you’ll enjoy it. If you’re one of the many people who have asked me about what Kilimanjaro is like, here’s everything I told you plus some stuff I forgot and some research I’ve done since.

Thanks for reading!