H.A. Larson's Blog, page 34

Being Present in my Now

One of my vacation photos.
Hello from somewhere else! I'm sure you're probably wondering why I didn't put up a post yesterday as is my usual Tuesday custom. Well...I'm on vacation. Now, I'm sure you're saying, "But you usually post while you're on vacation," and you're right.

Not this time.

I read a post by another blogger awhile back where she talked about how she started uninstalling her social media apps when she went on vacation (or shorter trips). Instead of spending what precious time she had away from the grind of her everyday life checking into locations, updating her accounts, and filtering/posting photos, she was being present in her vacation.

Huh. What a concept.

I thought that sounded like a good idea, so Sunday - before leaving town for the second part of vacation - I uninstalled my Facebook, Messenger, Instagram, and Twitter apps off of my phone. How has this social media blackout been for me? Blissful. Instead of spending half of my vacation time attached to my phone, I've barely touched it, and it's been wonderful. Instead of being distracted, I'm being present for the time away from the harsh realities of my everyday life, and I'm enjoying and savoring every last moment.

I'll reinstall everything before I head for the third, and last, part of my vacation, but I won't be putting up a Saturday post. I'll be very busy on this last leg of vacation as it's part business, but it's also part pleasure and I'll be taking advantage of those moments to the fullest as well.

I'll be putting up detailed vacation posts starting next week, but until then, enjoy your free time. Be present in your now.

Coffee Talk: Time, Budgets, and Vacation

Time just hasn't been on my side as much as it used to. I suppose it's just a consequence of getting older, but it still kind of sucks all the same. The older we get, the faster time goes, and there's not a whole lot we can do about it. Granted, my time goes even quicker because I've found myself way too busy in general. I've been thinking pretty heavily over the past few weeks about how I can make better use of my time, and how I can withdraw from some things that are just taking away from time I could be investing elsewhere. With all the things on my plate, I've been feeling the burn, admittedly, and I know I need to make some changes, but where do I start? I already pared down some things over the past several months, but I'm still swamped. I'll have to make some hefty decisions over the next month or so. Such is life.

I've been pretty productive this morning, even getting my budget folder prepped for July's bills. If you're new here you might be scratching your head wondering what I'm talking about. I dispense some common-sense financial advice at times, and a few years ago I shared my method for making a simple budget. It's not a standard budget, but rather a simple way to make sure bills are paid in full and on time each month. So, I got my July section ready to go for next month, and June's is nearly completed. There's something about getting bills paid that is so satisfying...even if it can also be very sad. Bye bye paycheck, I will miss you.

The best part about today though? I'm on vacation!!! You have no idea how ready I am for this vacation. I don't go back to work until Tuesday, July 3rd, and I am excited. With all the stuff going on in my life, I've been a bit stressed and feeling overwhelmed, so having 10 days off is going to be great. We'll be in town until Monday morning and then we're heading out to visit family and friends up North before heading South next weekend. Don't worry, I'll be sharing all of my vacation activities with you in fun posts like I usually do. Stay tuned for those!

Now, my dear readers, it's time for me to get a bit of writing done before signing off to enjoy a nice relaxing Saturday. Have a fantastic weekend!

-H.A.

My Heart Belongs to Dublin

I have debated for a few months now whether or not I really wanted to publish this post. I mean, my future plans are just that...plans, and I don't know if my plans will come to fruition or change. Of course, I'm pretty dead set on my plans - and I'm consistent at my age if nothing else - but none of us can predict the future, including myself. So, take this post with the idea that I will be able to follow through with this. Carry on, then, dear reader.

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Ahhh, Dublin. It's a city of wonderment, romanticism, history, and modernity, all mixed together to create the perfect place. The perfect place for me, that is. Over the past few years, my dreams of someday traveling the world for a year or two has given way to living somewhere in Europe. I've thought long and hard about where I'd like to hang my final hat one day, and after much thought and deliberation, I've decided on Dublin. This hasn't been a quick decision, nor is it a rash one, just to be clear.
Living in Europe is a dream of mine, and when I thought about where it would be that I wanted to live, I considered five main factors:


 1. Language : I readily admit that learning a foreign language is difficult for me. Therefore, when looking at where I'd ultimately want to live in Europe, I narrowed it down to the English-speaking countries.









2. Size: I grew up in a small, sleepy, little town...and I hated it. When I grew up I kept moving to bigger and bigger places until I landed in a city. I love the perks that a city can bring, and I love being an urban dweller. I need to live in a city with a population of one million or more.






3. Weather: I want to live where it gets neither extremely hot nor extremely cold. In other words, I want to live somewhere that has a more moderate temperature. Dublin averages 40-60 degrees F throughout the year, which for me is perfect as I am a leggings and long sleeves gal.











4. Proximity to other Countries: Traveling is big on my radar, so living in a country where traveling to other countries is both quick and inexpensive is a must. Ireland is close to the rest of Europe - as well as other places - and several perusals of flights to other places have revealed the quick and inexpensive I'm looking for.







5. Access to Nature: I might love city life and want to live as an urban dweller, but make no mistake, I am, and will always be, a nature girl. When I need a break from the daily grind, I need to plant myself in nature and hike. With Wicklow Mountains National Park to the South, the ocean coast directly to the East, and a whole bevy of other parks, bogs, castles, nature, and even the Cliffs of Moher, no more than a short train ride away, nature will be in abundance for me.



Like I said, these are the five main factors, but there are others. Having traveled to and tread upon the streets of Dublin, Limerick, and Galway, I'm already familiar with Dublin, and Ireland on the whole. I was completely captivated by this country (especially in comparison to others I've been to): the nature was breathtaking, the people were friendly, the cities and towns were fascinating, the history drew me in, and I related to the culture. Yes, I'm aware of the differences between visiting vs living, and the differences between there and here, but the thing going most for me is my sense of place. 

I've picked up and moved around to several places, and states, within the U.S. and I've never felt a sense of loss or sadness. Moving isn't that big of a deal to me, and I don't have those strong ties and sense of roots that some people do. I'm all about new experiences, living life to the fullest, and having adventures. I am unafraid to try something new...even if I'm alone when I do it. 

While many people could never imagine picking up and moving across the country, let alone to another country, I'm not afraid in the least. I realize that the worst that can happen is that it won't work out, and I can then move on to the next place. At least I gave it a shot! Truth be told, I don't want to be attached to or tied down to one place. I want to live my last, great years being a citizen of the world. So, while I have designs (as of now) to plant myself in Ireland, it's really just a place to hang my hat as I plan to spend the majority of my time visiting the rest of the world. But, if you have to spend some significant time in any one country....you could definitely do worse than Ireland.

I'm at a Crossroads

Photo courtesy of Dixon-Drone Photography. www.dixondrone.com

So much has happened in my life over the past couple of years that when I take a minute to reflect on it, I'm blown away by it all. In 2016, wanting to be more active and meet more like-minded people, I got involved in a couple of organizations that I felt passionate about. At that time, I could never have imagined just how far they would take me. And take me they have. To me, it's reminiscent of listening to Edvard Grieg's In the Hall of the Mountain King, where a quiet and slow start builds up into a loud and fast ending. While nothing has reached its prestissimo finale by any means, it's definitely reached a low crescendo. It's this crescendo that I'm looking at now and it's made me realize just how much my life has changed in two years. I'm standing at a crossroads now, and there are four roads surrounding me.
The road behind me is the one I've already traveled. 
I've known this road since I was a child. It's familiar, easy, and comfortable like an old friend, but it's also a dead end. What's done is done and cannot be undone. It's now a road of memories that run the gamut from happy, sad, angry, frustrated, and scared to everything in between. This road is filled with family vacations to my great uncle's house on a lake in Minnesota, my high school graduation, my first heartbreak, my first move away from my hometown, the birth of my children, writing my first book, and my first trip overseas. All of my weaknesses and strengths and all of my failures and triumphs are back there along this road.
The road in front of me is sure and steady.
This is the road I'm currently on. It's my job, my family, my home, my city, my friends, and the life I'm living. While changes do, and will, occur, it's a pretty steady life of living pretty much the same existence into the foreseeable future. It's safe, secure, acceptable, and fairly predictable. There's nothing wrong with staying on this road, but with my adventurous spirit, a never-ending desire for variety, and a passion to live life with more meaning, it's not exactly the road I want to stay on. In other words, while it's a good road where I can still carve out the life I want here and there, it wouldn't be satisfying for me long-term.

The road to my right is my writing career.
This road leads me to my preferred destination: a successful writing career. This is the road I want to take more than anything in this world. This is my dream, my passion, and my biggest hope. This road lets me make a career and a life out of doing what I love most while, at the same time, giving me the freedom to be my own boss, do what I want to do, and live the life I choose. I've been working hard and diligently for the last four years learning how to drive down this road and that won't change anytime soon. Currently, it runs parallel to the road in front of me, but I hope with all my heart that that changes.
The road to my left is one of the organizations I'm involved with.
I started with this organization, casually, in late 2016. By the spring of 2017, my involvement was more committed and we began planning a big event in earnest. Fast forward to last month when the event happened and it was everything we had hoped it would be and more. It was successful enough, in fact, that it's quickly becoming a viable career option for me. While this is fresh, exciting, and new, it also comes with risks - a fact that is not lost on me. The pay isn't great, no benefits, and there's the very real possibility the organization might not make it. If, however, the organization does become successful and grows with the momentum we've built, then I have a good position with great pay, numerous opportunities, regular travel all over the country, and a chance to make a difference in ways that are important to me. It's the adventure and excitement I crave all rolled into a career with meaning.

I'm standing at a crossroads.
I'm being pulled in three directions. One, my writing career, can be continued and done while I work - something that has been, and is, my reality for now. Until it becomes successful enough to support me, I have to work a real job. However, I'm not sure which job that should be. My regular job provides stability and benefits, but not much in the way of great pay or advancement. The organization doesn't provide stability nor benefits (at least not for now), but I've already advanced twice and it has the potential to be a great paying job if it becomes successful enough. My real dilemma then, is which job do I decide on? It's a conundrum that I've been struggling with for the past few weeks and will continue to struggle with until I can decide.


What do you think? What would you do if you were in my shoes? Let me know in the comments.

Surprise!

Let's be real for a minute. We all know that I'm an author. I write books, it's what I do. Being a writer is a creative process that I don't always have control over. What I mean by that, is that oftentimes - no matter my best efforts to keep some kind of order in my writing process - I am beholden to my subconscious. It's my subconscious that says, "Oh, that's what you want to do? Well, too bad! We're doing this instead." For the first handful of years that I was writing, it was this battle between my logical, organized side and my creative side that would cause me grief. Now, several years in, I gladly go where my creative side takes me because that's when I write my best work.
It's no great surprise to me, then, that after working on my Houses of Hades (HoH) trilogy in a diligent manner for a while, my creative mind took a different turn. Instead of being all into The House of Vermilion , I'm back into Vanished . For those of you who are new here, or just don't remember, Vanished was the book I began after I finished The Box . I wrote a few great chapters and then, my creative drive for it disappeared. Instead, I started thinking about the fantasy/mythos trilogy idea I had conjured up previously and ran with it. 
Similar to what happened about 2/3 of the way through The Box , I got the backstory laid out and a good start on the first book of HoH when my mind started drifting back towards  Vanished . I went back in, read through what I wrote, and was pleased with what I saw. The wheels started turning, so once again, I'm back writing Vanished. Only this time, it has (like my already completed work) a new cover. Here's the cover reveal:




What do you think?
Now, granted, my life is pretty busy and hectic outside of my writing career, so I'm not writing at the speed with which I used to, and that's okay. What's important is that my creative drive for weaving tales is like a burning ember at the bottom of a fire: always there and difficult to put out. Stay tuned in the coming weeks for an excerpt.
I'd love to hear your thoughts, so comment below!

My Weekend Routine

Ahh, the weekend. There's nothing quite like a couple of days off after a long week of work. While I don't structure my weekends in any rigid kind of sense, I do have a bit of a routine. In my life, my weekends begin on Friday night.

After a long week of work, writing, meetings, and taking care of household tasks; I love nothing better than to sit back and relax on a Friday night. I need to be "on" during the week so I rarely drink, but Friday evenings I drink some beer, listen to music, and stay off of social media for the most part.

During the work week, I wake up between 4:30 - 5:00 a.m., but on Saturdays, I sleep in a little bit. While I still tend to wake up around 7:00 a.m. on Saturday, it's still a few hours later than I would normally get to sleep but still early enough for me to have the house to myself. My family doesn't tend to wake up until after 9:00 a.m. so this gives me a few peaceful hours alone. I make a pot of coffee and pick up the house while it's brewing. Then, I sit down at my computer with a cup of my fresh brew and work on my writing stuff. Somewhere around noon, I shut down my computer, shower, and do something. Depending on the weather, or my mood, I will either hike, go to some event, visit friends, or sit around and relax. In the evenings, I usually have a good time with friends either at my house or theirs and occasionally will go out.

On Sundays, I usually sleep later than any other day of the week. I try to stay in bed until 9, but sometimes I don't. I have a similar morning routine on Sunday as I do on Saturday in that I make coffee and spend a bit of time at my computer, but I typically work on things related to the organization I'm involved with. After a couple of hours or so, I start working on chores that I need to get done. I'll work on laundry, clean house, prep food for the week, clean my makeup brushes, and maybe run some errands. Again, depending on the weather, I might also get outside for a walk or a hike, or visit with friends.

While my weekends usually go like this most of the time, sometimes they don't, and I think that's true of anyone. I think what I strive for every weekend are those amazingly wonderful, peaceful, few hours in the mornings where I can relax. I can stay in my pajamas, drink coffee at my leisure, and not have to rush around getting ready to go anywhere. The work week is all about rigid structure so having that quiet, unhampered downtime does wonders for my mental health.

How about you? What is your weekend routine like? Let me know in the comments.

Healthy Life: Some Things I've Learned

I've been working on a healthy life for quite some time now, and during this ride, I've traversed up the mountains and down into the valleys. It's hard to break old habits, do things the right way, and work against yourself when you've been doing things the same way forever. I'm finally on the right track towards getting my health where it should be and I've learned some things along the way. Today, then, I'm going to share what I've learned on my journey so far.

1. Getting healthy is hard.
No doubt about it, getting healthy is a battle, and the battle is with yourself. You are your own worst enemy when it comes to getting healthy. Start small and work your way up.

2. Over-eating is an addiction.

Constantly over-eating is an addiction, much like smoking and alcohol abuse. No matter the root cause, you have to deal with it whether that's mentally with yourself or if you need to seek the advice of a professional.

3. It's okay if you eat too much once in a while.
Denying yourself indulgences doesn't serve any good purpose. If you never indulge you're more likely to fail. So, if you want to eat a bunch one day once in awhile, go for it. Just don't make it a habit.

4. Dieting is temporary.

Dieting is temporary but being healthy lasts forever. Stop dieting and re-train yourself to be a healthier version of you.

5. Consumption of alcohol should be kept to a minimum.

Whenever I drink too much, I'm in terrible physical shape the next day. I find it hard to get any exercise and most often will just skip it. On top of that, I find myself feeling super-hungry and will turn back to all my old eating habits. Lastly, drinking alcohol just adds plenty of excess calories.

6. Getting a good night's rest is vital.

Not getting enough sleep does the same number on my body as the day after drinking, just not quite as pronounced. It also throws your entire bodily clock out of whack.

7. Discipline is key.
My secret weapon to getting healthy? Discipline. I have to be my own coach, guide, cheerleader, and drill sergeant. If I'm not disciplined, I find that I fail.

8. Nothing beats diet and exercise.
The key to long-term success is eating a well-balanced diet and getting regular exercise. All the fads, pills, and crazy diet infomercials cannot compete with treating your body correctly. Your body needs a healthy balance of foods that provide it with sustenance and regular exercise to keep your heart and lungs functioning healthily. This mindset doesn't stop when you've reached your goal. This is your goal...for life!

9. Avoid stress if at all possible.
Last, but not least, stress should be avoided if at all possible. Stress is a trigger and having good mental health is just as important as physical health. Avoid stressful situations and try to make time to decompress from everyday stressors.

And, that, my friends, are some of the things I've learned on my path to a healthy life. As for myself, here's my progress thus far:

I'm now down a total of 90 pounds from my heaviest. While I still have days where I indulge a bit more than I should (and that's okay), I typically eat three regular-sized meals and skip snacks. I walked/hiked 119.01 miles in the month of May, and am 15.67 miles up for June so far. I've dropped a total of three sizes from my heaviest and I finally bought some new clothes. Last year I bought a swimsuit off of Amazon that I couldn't get past my stomach, but when I tried the other day it fit perfectly! I bought a swimsuit coverup to go with it and am attending my first ever pool party in a few weeks.While I'm proud of my achievements so far, I still have a ways to go. Even so, I'm finally happy with myself and how I look. Having come as far as I have - combined with conquering some of my food/exercise demons - has been a great boost to my mental health as well.
Are you working towards a healthy life? If so, what are some of the things you've learned? Let me know in the comments.

The Write Life: Finish that Story!

When I was writing my first book, I had a friend who was working on their first book as well. Five years later, I have seven books under my belt and three more underway. My friend? Still hasn't finished that first book. Is my friend unique in this? Absolutely not. I've talked to several people over the years who, upon hearing that I'm an author, will tell me that they're working on a book. A book that sadly will never materialize. Chances are good that you know someone in this predicament as well, or you might even be that person yourself. For you, and for them, I say, "Finish that story!"
Look, I get it. As someone who's published a few books, I can say with all honesty that finishing a book is hard. Really hard. Writing the beginning is pretty easy. You have the idea, you start writing, things are going well, and then: bam...you hit the middle of the book. I call it the Mid-Story Crisis, or MSC. The middle of every book is like a reaching the base of a mountain during a strenuous hike. You've done pretty well, you're feeling good, but you pause at the base as you stare up the side of the mountain and think about all that will have to happen in order to reach the top. You know when you reach the top that it will all be downhill from there - albeit a few snags - but the real problem is scaling the mountain.
That, my friends, is the middle of every book. You will get to the top, but you have to keep going, even if it means going slower. Hitting the middle of each of my books has been a challenge and I combat those challenges in various ways: 
I'll write at least (AT LEAST) one sentence a day. It's not much, but it keeps you moving in the right direction and it keeps your feet firmly planted in your story. Both important.I'll sit down and write a few sentences that describe how I want the next few chapters to go. It keeps me thinking about the story and it gives me a guideline to work from.I'll watch videos and read articles/books that are of the same topic as my book. This, again, helps me stay planted in my own story and gives me inspiration for my own. Now, you're not trying to copy anyone else's work, you're just trying to keep your mindset in your story.I have a dedicated time, or two, that I reserve just for writing. This gives me some discipline and a routine. It's easier for me to stay focused if I have a work schedule.
There are other ways, I'm sure, to combat the dreaded MSC, but these are the main tactics I use to help me reach the summit of my story. You can use these or other methods, but either way, finish that story! It can be hard, but it's the most rewarding thing you can do if you want to be a writer. Being a writer is more than actually writing, it's putting out your finished product. Good luck.

It's All so Bittersweet

While there are still a couple of days before May is officially over, the month is pretty well wrapped up. This is a bittersweet reality for me as May has proven to be the busiest, hardest, craziest, most productive, and most incredible month for me. Many great things happened:

A small, but wonderful, convention happened the first weekend. I got to connect with many old and new friends.I hosted a large planning meeting the next weekend.Mother's Day was also the second weekend and I took a fun Day Trip Adventure with my husband and kids.The third weekend saw a huge milestone: The Teen graduated high school! I hosted family and friends from near and far. It was a lot of work, but I couldn't be more proud of him and happy for his future.Then, the last weekend (this past weekend) saw the fruit of a year and a half of hard work and planning come together with a large convention that I was intimately involved with. While it had its snags, it was more successful than I could have imagined and I will live with these memories for the rest of my life.In between all of these things I had several meetings each week, I worked a full-time job, I blogged here and wrote a short story for a series of newsletters, I kept up a house, and I was involved in my usual organizations & obligations. 
Now that I'm a couple of days removed from everything - and don't have a single meeting or other obligation this week - I've been sitting around processing everything. Last night was probably the first night in quite some time that I got a decent amount of sleep. My brain just refuses to be quiet long enough for me to get a full eight hours yet, but the six I got was the best I've gotten in a few weeks. I anticipate that in a few more days, I should be back to my regular daily routine.
I'm now looking forward to a few weeks of decidedly quiet days where I can just relax, decompress, and unwind. After that, I have a family vacation planned and a book to work diligently on. I'm looking forward to all of it. 
While I am exhausted, I am exhilarated. While I'm looking forward to some rest, I'm excited about all that has come to pass. I'm sad in some ways that it's all over, but I'm also energized and revitalized. It is bittersweet for sure.

Basic Financial Fitness: Investing in the Future

In this edition of BFF, I'd like to talk about investing. Now, when I say investing, I'm talking about the various ways that one can save money for the future, particularly retirement. Considering my age, I'm relatively new to investing, and, because I'm late to the game, I'm working hard to catch up. Right now, my investing goals are focused on two things:
1. an emergency fund 2. retirement savings
I've talked about the importance of saving before, particularly as it relates to emergency situations, so that's nothing new. To read my posts about saving for emergency situations, click here, and for using credit cards for emergencies, click here. 
In regards to Goal #1, I save money from each paycheck in case of an emergency. Now, mind you, it's not much as I don't make much money, but every little bit counts, and eventually I should reach my goal. My goal is to have the equivalent of three months worth of salary saved up to help me get by if tragedy should strike. Three months worth of salary would go a long way in helping me out in many a bad scenario, and should, I feel, get me on my feet again. 
Goal #2 is more of a new thing for me. Well, not entirely new as I have thought about it a lot over the past several years and have made some decent headway over the last few years. Back in 2008, I worked for a Fortune 500 company that offered me a retirement plan option (via a Roth IRA through Vanguard) and a stock share option (via Fidelity) right from the beginning of my employment there. I only worked there for a short period of time as I decided to go back to school and quit. At that time, I had invested in both options via small deductions from my check each pay period. When I quit, both the Roth IRA and stock option were both less than $200.00. I proceeded to forget all about both of them and went on with my life. 
Flash forward to a couple of years ago when I thought about those long-forgotten investments and set about getting back in touch with them. I had forgotten what my usernames and passwords were, so after a few phone calls to both Vanguard and Fidelity, I was able to get back into my old accounts. Imagine my surprise when I saw that my Vanguard Roth had actually increased, but imagine my bigger surprise when I realized my Fidelity stock share had increased 10-fold. That was my first lesson in the stock market: it's a long-term investment .
I have mentioned a few times before how I saved a nice chunk of change throughout my 30s by saving as little as $5.00 a paycheck. Well, I decided to take all that money and split it up between the Vanguard and the Fidelity accounts. I bought a Traditional IRA through Vanguard and set it up to reinvest the dividends into Index Funds. How did I decide on this course of action? I read an interview with Warren Buffett and that's what he recommended. I figured if one of the wealthiest men in the world (who happens to live in my city) recommended it, then it must have some merit. 
This last point is significant because I've talked before about how saving a small amount of money isn't much, but it is. I saved up a little bit for years and then invested it in something that will grow at a more accelerated pace as I move towards retirement. It all goes back to what I've said about how saving is not only important but necessary. 
Going back to Goal #1, it's important and necessary to build up an emergency fund as well. Even if you have to save $5.00 for each one every paycheck, you're still putting your money to good use. If you won't miss $5.00, chances are you won't really miss $10.00 either. If you haven't started saving money yet, start with your next paycheck. I recommend opening an online account that has automatic savings, like Capital One 360, as you can set your online account to automatically withdraw money each paycheck from your regular bank. When you open the online account, open up both a checking and a savings account. Designate one as your Emergency Fund and the other as your Retirement Fund and start those automatic withdrawals of $5.00/paycheck for each one. Of course, save more than that if you can.
You can turn around and use your retirement fund to open up an account with a place like Vanguard or Fidelity. Make sure to read up on your employers retirement plan as well and take advantage of it if you can.

Happy Saving.


Disclaimer: I'm no money expert, but I am a woman who's had to learn to live below her means and save for future goals on a small, paycheck-to-paycheck existence. I've learned a few other things along the way, and you can find my basic money advice in my Basic Financial Fitness series. Questions? Comment below.