Harry Connolly's Blog, page 50

The Health Benefits of Reading

The WSJ has an interesting article on “reading parties,” (skip the comments). People are getting together to read in silence, which is fine, I guess?

The really interesting thing is the list of health benefits to reading, which is included in this handy graphic.

“Reduces stress” is vital, and “Improves listening” makes me think I should have my son read three or four times a day.

But I’m still stymied by the idea of reading parties. I get that it can be pleasant to meet new people doing the thing you love (especially if you’re the type to bring “impressive” books so everyone could see how smart you are) but it still seems like putting yourself in a position where the people around you will, with your permission, police your own behavior. “I’d never stay off Twitter for 30 minutes if I were alone, but if I have all these people watching me…”

I’m not saying there’s something wrong with it, but it’s not a choice I would make. If I realize the book I’m reading can’t keep me so absorbed that I stay off Twitter, I put the book away. Then again, I’ve never been the sort who tried to impress people with my reading choices.

ADDED LATER: I took the speed reading test. While my comprehension was perfect (partly because I knew I’d be tested) my wpm was 261, slightly above average. That surprises me, because I’ve always believed I was slower than average. I guess I’m just slower than everyone I know.

Time is running out on Dark Fantasy StoryBundle

Mind if I show some covers?

The countdown for the dark fantasy StoryBundle is about to run out. If you want to do a little early Giftmas shopping, now is the time.

Some points:

Pay $3 or more, get five books.

Pay $12 or more, get all nine.

You get to choose how much goes to the author and how much to StoryBundle.

You get to choose which charity, if any, your purchase will benefit.

You can buy the books as a substantial but inexpensive gift.

Anyway, I’m trying one last push to sell some books. The more retweets this tweet receives, the more free bundles I’ll give away. If you have a Twitter account, please consider clicking that RT button.

RT to win a Dark #Fantasy @storybundle giveaway: @Jnassise @timpratt @mariehallwrites & more
http://t.co/AQIlpbkTIR pic.twitter.com/Nhs4R2XSgy

— Gluten Dragon (@byharryconnolly) September 15, 2014

No one is ever going to hire me for my graphic design skills. Yikes.

The last Twitter giveaway got over 70 RTs, so I have hopes this one will do ever better. Thanks for clicking “retweet.” Frankly, I need the money.

My Wonder Woman Pitch

[I started this post way back when Gal Godot was first cast and I'm blowing the dust off it because what the hell.]

So we’re getting Wonder Woman in a movie, but not a Wonder Woman movie.

Christopher Bird has an interesting post about the difficulties the character faces. I’m not sure I agree that Wonder Woman has never had a “definitive” run: while I’m not a WW expert by any means, William Marston created the basics of the character, and Greg Rucka’s stint where she was the ambassador from Themyscira is pretty awesome.

I’m not sure the U.N. is a place to start a franchise, though. It might work for a TV series, but movies would need more setup and a greater willingness to break status quo.

(BTW, supposedly WB seems to have a pretty good version of The Flash coming up. Hopefully it’ll be a step above the ’90′s version.)

Unfortunately, it seems WW is going to be a supporting role in the new Man of Steel movie. has been cast. People are already complaining about her: she’s too this, she’s too that, but I’ll reserve judgement. Yes, she is a former Miss Israel and a Miss Universe contestant (her “National Costume” is disappointingly non-bonkers) and yes, she served two years in the Israeli military (as a “sports trainer”?). Yes, it’s fun to speculate.

But I remember when people were complaining about Daniel Craig being cast as James Bond (“A blond Bond? What are they thinking?”). I remember when they griped about Tom Cruise playing Lestat. Both actors were terrific in those roles. The truth is, if the script is good, we will love Gadot in the part. If the script sucks, we’ll blame her for screwing it all up.

Anyway, this is how I would pitch a Wonder Woman movie if they were going to make one, which they should:

It opens during the climax of MAN OF STEEL (to tie the films together). The Kryptonians are moving their big drill blasting machine over India, and Superman hasn’t yet gone to destroy it. However, there’s a US aircraft carrier nearby, which desperately scrambles jets to intercept.

One of the pilots is Steve Trevor, who is not so gung ho as the other pilots. What hope do humans have against an advanced civilization? Still, he takes off with all due speed and joins the other jets to attack the ship as it moves into position.

The jets’ missiles have tremendous range, but they don’t even get close enough to launch them. The unmanned drill (it was unmanned, iirc) blasts them them with a Crazy Beam(tm) which stops the jets in space as though they’ve collided with a mountainside. Only Trevor manages to make a defensive maneuver, losing part of his plane.

His plane has become nearly impossible to keep in the air, alarms going off like crazy, but he keeps flying, trying to get close enough to launch a missile. He dodges two more beams, but it’s clear he’s not going to make it. His commander orders him to eject, and he does.

Moments later, the beam strikes his plane, smashing it and holding it in the air like a crumpled piece of burning metal, same as the others.

As he floats toward the water below, he radios that he can see sharp rocks, crashing waves and sharks swimming between them. There’s no safe place for him to set down and he doesn’t expect to survive. “Tell my mother that I loved her and that she was right. Again.”

Then, as he comes nearer the water, the view changes as though he’s passing through a mirage. Suddenly there’s a gorgeous island below him. It’s Themyscira: verdant green woods, white sand beaches, gorgeous waterfalls, and white marble buildings that show no evidence of a keystone and arch.

His radio sparks and goes dead. The beams above him stop, and the jets begin to fall out of the sky. Only Trevor’s is above the island, falling toward a beach where a bunch of little girls no older than 8 are playing. All Trevor can do is redirect his chute out of the path of the wreckage.

An athletic woman, backlit by the sun so she can’t be clearly seen, charges out of the forest onto the beach. She sprints toward those little girls, who have noticed the danger and begun to scream in terror. The woman leaps into the air, fist drawn back, and soars upward, directly into the falling wreckage. She throws that punch.

A massive CRUNCH, and the clump of metal is redirected out into the water, the woman splashing down into the waves with the burning jet.

And that’s the first appearance of Wonder Woman.

Trevor realizes his parachute is on fire, and redirects toward the beach. He hits very hard, but basically okay. He sees the little girls fleeing into the forest, shepherded by some 14 year old girls, and tries to wave to them in a friendly way. They keep running; they’re terrified of him.

There’s no one around, so he follows them up the only path in the forest. Hey, there’s a woman in some sort of tunic. Is that a bow and arrow she’s pointing at him?

He ducks just as the arrow flies by his head, then flees, drawing his pistol. Crashing through the forest, he stumbles on a group of teenage girls gathering herbs, frightening them. He quickly holsters his weapon again, then keeps running. On a nearby trail, a woman warrior with shield and spear charges at him. He aims the pistol at her but she won’t stop, so at the last moment, he shoots her in the foot.

Crashing through the forest, Trevor barely manages to escape a few more attacks through a combination of blundering and dumb luck. In fact, he begins to suspect they’re toying with him. Then he comes face to face with a tall strong woman with a commanding presence: DIANA. She snatches the gun from his hand as if he’s a child, then backhands him unconscious.

The other women who hunted him through the woods circle around, including the injured one. They look down at him with disgust, except for Diana, who seems puzzled. The teenagers come close, herbs still in their arms. Why didn’t he kill them when he could?

Diana and her friends drag Trevor before the queen, who is landing on the roof of their temple on the back of a huge eagle-like creature that is completely see-through, as though it’s made of water; it’s very difficult to see. The queen compliments her daughter on her skill and the loyalty she commands from her friends. The circle of five women Diana has around her are deadly and admirable warriors. Still, why did they wait for him to leave the beach? Why stalk and observe him before their attack? Diana should be more bold. More willing to take risks. The princess is chastened.

Then the queen immediately declares a death sentence on Trevor. Diana asks for a delay; yes, men are forbidden on Themyscira, but this one had a chance to harm young women or take them hostage, but he didn’t. He also chose to wound Elena when he could have killed her. Could the outside world have changed?

No, the queen says. He will be healed and then executed at dawn.

Steve is thrown into a cell. The walls are decorated with the history of the Amazons in convenient graphic novel exposition form: A floating mountain, monsters streaming out of it, Amazons attacking, the mountain falling out of the sky.

Elena and Diana’s other groupies confirm with her that they’re going to meet later–they have something special planned. Diana returns to the beach to examine Trevor’s gear. It’s so alien to her. XANTHIPPE, one of her circle, approaches. Diana is troubled by Trevor’s equipment; it’s so advanced. If Men were to attack Themyscira, how could they hold out against such advanced weapons?

Xanthippe tells Diana the sun has nearly gone down, and they must meet their friends. They run together to the base of a mountain, and the five of them, minus the injured Elena, run through the forest, leaping gorges, shimmying up cliffs, bounding from tree to tree… it’s forest parkour in the magic-hour light, and they are gorgeous and impressive. Too bad Elena couldn’t be here.

Xanthippe leads them to a secret temple, hidden away in the mountains. Diana tells they they shouldn’t be here, it’s forbidden, but the other young women tease her about her constant dedication to duty. Can’t she have a little fun once in a while? Besides, inside the temple are the relics of the great heroines of the Amazonian past. That’s something they would all like to see, and because Diana is of royal blood, only she can open the doors. Diana still resists, but the others make a crack about her mother’s words. Lead us. Be bold. Take a risk.

Sure. Let’s do it. Diana lays her hand on the doors and they open.

The inside of the temple is very like a museum. The young women enter and kneel in prayer, devout before the gods above all else. Then they move through the building, looking at the statues around them. One statue has The Bracelets. One wears The Tiara. Another holds a shield. Another bears an enchanted sword. A cuirass. Everything is covered in dust, but not these items. They’re enchanted. They come from That Other Place.

Diana tells her friends to look but not touch. Xanthippe immediately blows a powder in the princess’s face.

It’s a drug. Anyone else would have fallen asleep immediately, but not Diana. Her “groupies” attack her, kicking and punching her while she’s disoriented. Still, she’s too much for them, even drugged, and it’s only when Xanthippe throws the tiara like a discus, knocking her out, that the princess falls.

Diana wakes to find the statues shattered and the magic implements stolen. She runs through the forest at night and confronts Elena, who is still being healed. At first she doesn’t want to talk, but she finally admits that Xanthippe has found a way to bring back the gods. The relics on Themyscira aren’t the only relics in the world. Once the last one is collected from its hiding place in the world of men, the real Mount Olympus will appear in the sky again. The Amazons will no longer have to live without their gods.

There’s only one way off Themyscira. Diana races to the bay just as her four former friends escape in a huge living creature–see-through like the queen’s riding eagle, but shaped like a whale. There’s a big fight scene as they escape, and the Amazonians use the relics to injure the other creatures living in the pen and block the bay.

The sun is about to rise. Diana rushes to her mother’s house and steals her ride. She flies the eagle–which is hard to control because it’s used to the queen’s hand–right out of the palace.

Meanwhile Steve Trevor is being led into the town square by a squad of beautiful Amazons. He thinks he’s died and gone to heaven. As he passes an old woman, she reaches out and smears some kind of weird paste on his forehead while saying something unintelligible.

He’s brought before the queen, who demands his name. He’s astonished that they speak English, and the queen says they just put a spell on him so that he would understand their language, all the better to inform him of what was about to happen.

The crowd parts and there’s the biggest Amazon of all, wearing a hood and holding a headsman’s axe.

Steve tries to break free, but the Amazons were expecting that. He makes some sort of courageous last remark then Diana swoops down on the back of the giant bird and rescues him from the crowd. She circles the square long enough to tell her mother that the relics have been stolen and that she needs Trevor to help navigate the World of Men so she can retrieve them. Then flies away.

That’s the setup. Here are the story beats that would be included.

- Amazonian friends: Xanthippe is the smart, calculating one, a leader. Another will be a huge brute who loves to fight (steals sword relic, thinking it’s most powerful). The third is conflicted about betraying Diana but devoutly wishes for the return of the gods. The fourth feels unfairly passed over (although she wasn’t) for some sign of status.

- Diana’s astonishment at the way the world has changed, mirrored by the astonishment of her Amazonian sisters. In fact, they would both “come ashore” in different places and have very different experiences.

- Steve transfers a bit of the goop on his forehead to Diana’s and he repeats the old Amazon’s incantation from memory, allowing her to understand every language in the world.

- The groupies meet up with U.S. forces. They’re intrigued with each other. The weaponry of the world of men has advanced a great deal, and the invisible ship technology would be damned intriguing for U.S. forces.

- One thing that rarely works in movies is the “magic ritual that must be stopped”. Better to have the ritual start early, the good guys try to stop it, and then fail. So, Xanthippe collects the relics, uses them to find the lasso, and knows that’s the place where Mt Olympus fell: somewhere in the U.S. or right next to a U.S. airbase, where Steve Trevor can do his soldier thing.

- Diana fights her former friends, who are much more formidable now that they have the relics. Trevor wants her to wait for support troops or whatever, but the princess wants to do what her mother told her. Take chances. Be bold. She loses the fight against them, and the ritual finishes, raising Mt. Olympus.

- The whole planet is being invaded by pseudo-mythological Greek monsters. They have weapons and armor that is either magical or so advanced it might as well be magic, but the whole deal plays like an alien attack. The various monsters are like alien races with incredibly powerful giants commanding them (the gods, basically).

- Diana and Steve are having strong feelings for each other, but it could never work between them. She’s of royal blood and he’s a commoner. He makes a joke about all Americans being royalty because they all rule together.

- Diana needs to reclaim the relics and goes after the groupies. One fight should take place in a construction site with a lot of scaffolding, to mirror the forest parkour scene.

- Hey, there are other superheroes? Mix up something to occupy them while Diana takes the lead against Olympus. Mention casually that Superman is fighting a big dude wearing a lion skin.

- The climax takes place on the face of Mt. Olympus. She infiltrates the stronghold with an invisible “plane”, bringing Trevor and a small squad. She’s learned to lead others, but instead of being bold and rushing ahead, she gathers intelligence. The other gods are sleeping–only Ares is awake and active.

- Big fight, impossible odds, Diana leads the fight against Ares, fighting on the outside of the flying mountain, and with the other soldiers’ assistance, finally defeats him.

- Finally, injured and exhausted by the massive battle, the other gods awaken. Oh no! If one god was so tough, how can she beat all of them? But the “gods” thank her for releasing them and withdraw. Diana is welcomed back to U.S. territory as a hero, then returns to Themyscira with her defeated groupies. The queen demands she remain safely at home, live like a true princess among her people, but Diana is determined to return to the world at large and see as much of it as she can. To take a chance on it.

As for the tone, it should be less gritty than DC fare so far. Filled with action, yes. Attraction between her and Steve Trevor, absolutely. Monsters and people dying, sure. But there will be young girls in the audience, because superhero princess, so the story will have to be interesting enough for adults but free of the nastiness that will make it unsuitable for younger viewers. So, rated PG.

Randomness for 9/11

1) X-men mashed up with The Smiths.

2)

Five Classic Authors Who Hated Their Book Covers (and One Who Got His Ass Kicked as a Result)

3) Scrublands: photographs of people who live off the grid.

4) Rupert Giles plans coursework for an MLS.

5) Everything you need to know about 5th ed D&D.

6) Beautiful animated gifs. h/t @keithcalder

7) “Every year, Americans spend nearly three times as much on candy as they do on public libraries.”

The Way Into Darkness cover art reveal

The September Kickstarter update just went out, but you don’t have to click through to see the unveiled cover art by Chris McGrath. Why, just look

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here:

There’s a progress update, too, but you’ll have to click through to read it because I don’t want to type all that out again.

The Cuckoo’s Calling by Robert Galbraith

The Cuckoo’s Calling by Robert Galbraith


My rating: 4 of 5 stars

3.5 stars for a book that started poorly but became compulsive reading as the story went on.

This book flies straight down the center of the genre, in that everything anyone talks about is somehow related to the main plot, it’s a long series of conversations (interrogations, really) one after another, with clues hidden in the details that don’t line up, and a crime as improbable as any.

Not that I care about a whodunit. I never try to follow the clue by clue, guessing the real killer or whatever. I just enjoy the characters and their secrets.

How *have* private eye novels been doing? I have been under the impression that they’re out of favor, and that maybe “Galbraith” is keen on resurrecting another moribund genre. It doesn’t really matter, because this book, despite a few rough patches, was great fun (once you read beyond the unpromising first few chapters). I’ll be grabbing the sequel.





Buy a copy.

Gaudy Night, by Dorothy L. Sayers

Gaudy Night by Dorothy L. Sayers


My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I’m reading these books all out of order.

Harriet Vane is my favorite Mary Sue in all of literature, largely because she’s so complicated and difficult, for herself and for everyone around her. Lord Peter Whimsey (and I don’t care what anyone says, but that’s the best/worst character name ever) is brilliant, super-rich, heroic, funny, well-educated, and completely in love with her. She loves him back but won’t marry him because he saved her from the gallows the first time they met, and she hates the imbalance between them. She can’t bear to marry someone she’s supposed to feel grateful toward.

I kept expecting this to turn into a murder mystery, but really it’s about doxing a particularly vicious pre-internet troll. That makes it the most interesting murderless mystery I’ve ever heard of.

Anyway, I suppose I should have fallen in love with Oxford–the text certainly wanted me to–but it didn’t happen. I did have to employ Fantasy Reading Protocols for the allusions the extremely well-educated characters employed, but that was part of what makes it fun. Also fun was seeing Harriet grapple with a new level of psychological depth in her novel-in-progress while Sayers herself populates the book with a whole platoon of wonderful characters.

I don’t think of this as the sort of book I enjoy. It’s not dark, it’s not violent, it’s not full of grief… Still, I stayed up all hours to finish, and whatever I read next will suffer by comparison.

Good book.





Buy your own copy.

Novelist given psych exam, locked away by police for work of fiction he published at 20

[UPDATE: According to the L.A.Times, McLaw was not removed from his job and taken for treatment because of the novels. Apparently, he wrote a four-page letter that alarmed authorities, and they've known about the novels for a couple of years.

It's frustrating, because I heard about this story a week ago when it first broke, and I was waiting to see what would shake out before writing a post. If I'd waited until this afternoon instead of this morning, I wouldn't have relied on the ridiculous early news report, which was disseminated widely and which explicitly linked his books to administrative action.

I'll leave the original post below, for the obvious reasons.]

You may have heard about Patrick McLaw, a twenty-three year old teacher in Maryland who has been kicked out of his job, is being investigated by the county sheriff, has had his home searched, had the school where he taught searched, has been forbidden to go onto county property at all, is being given a psychological exam in a location that the police will not name, and is not free to leave, according to the cops. Has he been arrested? Authorities will not say. Try not to be surprised when I say he’s black.

His crime? Three years ago he self-published a science fiction novel, set 900 years in the future, about the race to stop a school shooter.

You can read about his story at The Atlantic. I encourage everyone to read it; it’s short and it matters. If you’re curious about the book, not only is it still on Amazon, but the publicity has bumped it quite high in the sales rankings.

I guess it’s possible that there’s something else going on here beyond administrative freak out, but I would be surprised. This sort of over reaction from a school administration is all about the fear and power of petty bureaucrats who are terrified of being seen to have done too little. Any possibility, however slim, that they might be dissected in the media, post-catastrophy, about what they knew and why they didn’t act, drives them like fanatics.

It doesn’t help that so many school officials seem ready to accommodate the most paranoid parents in their district. It all feeds the little voice inside them that says thinking up the plot of a book is the same thing as fantasizing about it.

Based on the news reports we’ve had so far, Patrick McLaw has broken no law. It’s possible he’s being told that he has to do everything he’s told to keep his job, but I can’t understand how a sensible member of the judiciary thought publishing a novel three years earlier was probably cause for a search of the guy’s house.

It’s disgusting.

How not to respond to a mildly negative review, part 3,000,807

Guy writes interactive novel about mystery-solving teddy bears in Venice, which is apparently not for children(?)

Reviewer gives it a mildly negative review.

Author loses his mind in comments.

This is from last May, and I’m not sure how I missed it. It’s the perfect example of the ABM, Author’s Big Mistake, in which an author takes great pains to try to school the reviewer in all their numerous errors but ends up looking like a complete tool. As it so often is, Dunning-Kruger Effect is in full swing here. The writer thinks his book about teddy bears is on the level of Keats or Fitzgerald, and nothing can convince him otherwise.

This train wreck comes to you courtesy of @Hello_Tailor, @Stacia_jones_, and @jamesdnicoll.

Dark Fantasy StoryBundle is now live

Hey, you guys. You know what a StoryBundle is, don’t you? There are several novels all bundled together into one package, and you can pay whatever you like for them (with a $3 minimum). If you’re willing to pay above a certain dollar figure ($12), you get extra books.

Well, currently there’s a Dark Fantasy StoryBundle running for a limited time. You can spend three measly bucks and get five novels. For $12 (or more) you get nine.

Plus, if you so choose, 10% of your purchase price can go to charity. In fact, you can support the ALS Association, the charity that has been benefiting from the ice bucket challenge, but without the social shaming issues that come from “challenging” people. If you think ALS has already received its fair share of support lately, the other options are Girls Write Now and Mighty Writers. There’s a “Learn More” link on the page to tell you more about those charities, but I just want to say that I grew up in Philadelphia and anyone who wants to throw a little love to Mighty Writers would earn my gratitude (not that the other programs are not worthy, too).

You also get to choose what percentage of the purchase price goes to the authors and what goes to the folks at StoryBundle, which is a great way to do things.

All the books are DRM-free. The other authors include a Hugo-winner and a couple of best-selling authors (as well as, somehow, me). The fiction here is *dark* urban fantasy without romance plots, so if you like my work, you might also like these other books. PLUS, it’s super easy to buy the bundle as a gift for someone else.

Anyway, if you guys wouldn’t mind helping to spread the word about this, I’d appreciate it. And check out those books. I’m downloading my bundle right now.

Here are the covers: