Megan Cyrulewski's Blog, page 4
July 28, 2015
Am I Filling Out A Pre-School, College or Dating Service Application?
Madelyne is starting preschool next year in our city public school system. Yesterday, I received an email from the Director of the program welcoming us to the school and attached "some" forms to fill out. Now, some to me means 3 or 4 pages...or in this case 12. Twelve pages of information. Madelyne is 4. I'm not sure she's been alive long enough to warrant 12 pages of information.I understand that some of these forms have to be filled out by law. However, I'm not sure what might be too much information or not enough on some of these forms.
Take the medical form, for example. Some of the questions, I feel might need further explanation. Hearing problems: Medically, no but psychologically, she does have selective hearing like when she's told not to run for the 800th time at the public pool and then the lifeguard blows her whistle hence startling her whereupon she falls on her butt on the tile and thinks it's funny so she continues to run.
What about the menstrual problems question? On a preschool medical form? Are they asking about mine because I'm pretty sure Madelyne is a little too young right now. What about Birth History? Do they want to know that it was 27 hours of pure hell and I truly believe that an epidural is a gift from God?
Then there is the Family and Social History portion. Am I married? God no. Am I living with someone? Umm...my parents because I'm cool? Is there a stepfather in the picture? No because I hate dating but I like sex so if there are any single dads in the program that would be great?
Am I divorced? Yes. If so, please add remarks. Should I say, "See Attached" and give them a copy of my book? How is the relationship of the child with the father? Well, he hasn't seen her in three years so I guess it's not too great? Is there a stepmother in the picture? Ummm...he's engaged for the 5th time but my friends and family are taking bets on how many more "stepmothers" there will be by the time Madelyne finishes high school?
And then there are the questions that depend on which day you're asking. How would you describe your child's personality? She's 4. Her personality changes every hour. What time does your child awaken in the morning? If she's crabby, the rule is not to "awaken" the sleeping beast. Word child uses for bowel movement: Again, she's 4 so right now she says the word poopy to describe most things. I'm poopy, she's poopy, the squirrel is poopy, my work is poopy, her shoes are poopy, you get the picture. Time of the day when she usually has a bowel movement: Ummm...I don't write it on my schedule but when I hear her singing in the bathroom and then pausing to grunt, I'm pretty sure there's some poopy going on.
Are there any brothers/sisters? Well, I had major postpartum after Madelyne was born and I don't really remember the last time I've had a good night's sleep so is the answer no or hell-for-the-love-of-God-no?
And that's only the first 5 pages - 7 more to go...
July 26, 2015
Authors Supporting Authors: Faye Hall
What is your name? Faye Hall
Where are you from?
Queensland, Australia
What genre are you in?
Historical erotic romance
Please list your books and the year of publication.
My gift to you (Dec 2012),
She’s A lot Like You ( April 2014),
Mistress of Purity ( August 2015),
Passions in the Dust (October 2015)
Do you have any weird/strange habits when you work?
Not really, though I do tend to talk to my computer.
Do you prefer writing or typing?
Typing
What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received about life, writing, or anything?
Just keep going if it’s what you want to do. Sometimes you just got to wait for the right time to get the opportunity you’re looking for.
If you could pick one place to write for the rest of your life, where would it be?
Old moss covered cottage in the middle of the forest somewhere.
Does your family/friends read your books? If so, what do they think? Most of my friends have bought my books and have said they enjoyed them, always hanging out for the next one. My niece is also an avid reader, though she pays out on me saying ‘her aunt is the queen of mummy porn’ lol.
Share one thing that would surprise people!
I never learnt how to ride a push bike.
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Misstress of Purity Synopsis
When Seth Kenner arrived in Bowen, Australia, never could he have imagined that in a few short years he would be the wealthiest property owner in the state. He had birthright, money, property…but he didn’t have love.
Once there was a woman Seth had wanted to spend his forevers with, but he had been forced to leave Ella Matthis back in England. Out of desperation he agreed to order a mail order bride, hoping if nothing else to fill the void Ella had left in his heart.
When his mail order bride arrived at his cattle station in Bowen, he was well surprised to see the woman who was once his lover standing before him.
Ella Matthis had watched the man she loved sail away with another woman to a far off country. Her life crumbled around her from that moment – she lost her home – her family – her social standing. Ella had nothing.
When she was asked to take her mistress’ place as a mail order bride to Australia, Ella immediately accepted, hoping this new land would give her a freedom she had never known; and a new start so she could finally leave behind her past and those still hunting her.
Ella knew nothing of this man she was going to meet, nor did she care for she knew he could never replace the man she had already surrendered her heart to.
Though still bitter at each other, neither Seth nor Ella can ignore the burning passion that still lays smoldering just beneath the surface. Together they face cattle rustlers and scrub fires, poisoned and shot livestock, and police who constantly turn a blind eye; each calamity drawing them closer and closer until finally they are again surrendering their desires to each other, their passions igniting a flame neither had felt before.
Only when those hunting Ella track her to Australia does her life again begin to unravel. Though Seth had sworn to protect her, he too soon finds it isn’t only her past that has found them here in Bowen. He too has some explanations to make when Ella learns he still has a wife back in England.
Reader Alert! Ella Matthias thought by coming to Bowen, Australia she would find freedom from the life of servitude she’d been forced into, as well as the lover, Seth Kenner, who had so coldly deserted her. Never could she have imaged that it was Seth who had sent for her.
Again being drawn into Seth’s life, Ella finds herself surrendering to passion, and experiencing pleasures in the Australian outback that she had only ever dreamed of.
These pleasure come under threat though by those who wish to destroy everything they had worked so hard to achieve. Together they must fight bush fires, cattle rustlers, poisoned stock and a wife and fiancé who had come to Australia to claim what they believe is rightfully their’s.
To My Readers: Ella Matthis, the heroine, has had to face one disaster after another but never has she given up. She shows a strength that was needed by so many women who moved to Australia during the 1870’s. Seth Kenner, the hero, shows a humility and work ethic so rarely seen amongst others of his class. And he shows resilience far beyond his years.
I love the characters, I love their strength, but most of all, I love the passion they still hold for each other even after life rips them apart. I also love the setting…an Australian cattle station…it’s just so iconic to this part of the world, as too are the threats and struggles that are faced.
I hope all my readers hold a little piece of Australia in their hearts after reading this book.
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Passions in the Dust Synopsis
When Duke Seth Kenner arrived in Bowen, Australia, never could he have imagined that in a few short years he would be the wealthiest property owner in the state. He had birthright, money, property…but he didn’t have love.
Once there was a woman Seth had wanted to spend his forever’s with, but he had been forced to leave Ella Matthis back in England. Out of desperation he agreed to order a mail order bride, hoping if nothing else to fill the void Ella had left in his heart.
When his mail order bride arrived at his cattle station in Bowen, he was well surprised to see the woman who was once his lover standing before him.
Ella Matthis had watched the man she loved sail away with another woman to a far off country. Her life crumbled around her from that moment – she lost her home – her family – her social standing. Ella had nothing.
When she was asked to take her mistresses place as a mail order bride to Australia, Ella immediately accepted, hoping this new land would give her a freedom she had never known; and a new start so she could finally leave behind her past and those still hunting her.
Ella knew nothing of this man she was going to meet, nor did she care for she knew he could never replace the man she had already surrendered her heart to.
Though still bitter at each other, neither Seth nor Ella can ignore the burning passion that still lays smouldering just beneath the surface. Together they face cattle rustlers and scrub fires, poisoned and shot livestock, and police who constantly turn a blind eye; each calamity drawing them closer and closer until finally they are again surrendering their desires to each other, their passions igniting a flame neither had felt before.
Only when those hunting Ella track her to Australia does her life again begin to unravel. Though Seth had sworn to protect her, he too soon finds it isn’t only her past that has found them here in Bowen. He too has some explanations to make when Ella learns he still has a wife back in England.
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Links
Buy links
http://eredsage.com/store/ShesALotLikeYou.html
http://www.amazon.com/Shes-Alot-Like-Faye-Hall-ebook/dp/B00JZ781XM/ref=la_B00DPIMSMW_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1399380045&sr=1-1
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Social Media Links
website http://www.faye-hall.com
blog http://www.faye-hall.info
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Faye-Hall/174774709247649
https://www.facebook.com/faye.hall.3363?ref=tn_tnmn
Twitter https://twitter.com/FayeHall79
Goodreads http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6882637.Faye_Hall
Tumblr http://fayehallauthor.tumblr.com/
Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/fayehall79/
Instagram https://instagram.com/fayehalleroticromance/
Flipagram http://flipagram.com/fayehall79
Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCoS8vLrlO0XZT80xTuJnrkA/videos
July 16, 2015
College Kids - This Will Be You in 15 Years
As some of you know, I recently visited my college campus, Grand Valley State University (GVSU), for the first time since I graduated in 2001. It was orientation week so I saw a lot of potential GVSU students wandering around with their groups. Summer classes were being held so I saw students with their backpacks walking to class. I saw the grounds crew on their gold carts tending to the flowers. And then there's me. Wandering around campus. Taking a selfie. Talking to myself. Awesome.When I was a freshman at GVSU in 1996, not many people knew GVSU even existed. I think our freshman class was the biggest to date. GVSU had a pretty high acceptance rate. I mean, I was accepted with a high school GPA of 2.5. Let's just assume that I wasn't accepted for my stellar academic achievements.
Way back in 1996, once you got off the freeway, you drove a two lane highway to the middle of no where, which was were GVSU was located. There was one liquor store where the owner gave you a free shot glass for your 21st birthday. A fraternity occupied a dilapidated house that smelled like vomit. The only fast food restaurant was a drive-thru McDonald's. If you had to go grocery shopping, it took 20 minutes just to get the nearest grocery store. You know the campus was in the sticks when Meijer was the college hangout at 3 in the morning. However, all of that has changed.
When I drove to GVSU this past Monday, I counted 3 party stores, a Tim Horton's, Burger King, a couple of restaurants, a couple of bars, a couple of coffee shops - and that was off campus. On campus, they have Papa Johns delivery. Delivery! How brilliant is that? Rewind 15 years ago and the sober one of the group had to drive 30 minutes to the "local" Little Caesars to pick up an obscene amount of pizza. Also, there is a Starbucks on campus. I might have cried in pure jealousy. Starbucks. On Campus. In two locations. Genius.
During my campus trek, I meandered over to Kirkhoff Hall, where I spent most of my time. Kirkhoff housed a lot of student organizations, the bookstore, GVSU student life desk, etc. I really wanted to see the Volunteer!GVSU office because I was on the board of that organization. Much to my dismay, the office was no longer on the second floor. I had to ask a "student" (and I put it in quotes because I swear he looked like he was 12) where the Volunteer!GVSU office was located. He pointed me in the right direction while he was texting and working on the computer. Kids these days.
Once I finally found the office, the following conversation happened:
Two girls at the front desk: "Can we help you?"
Me: "Hi! I graduated in 2001 and this is my first visit to campus since graduation!"
Girl 1: "Wow. That was a long time ago."
Girl 2: "I think my Dad graduated then too!"
Me: "Umm...seriously? Are you starting here in the fall?"
Girl 2: "I just finished my freshman year."
Me: "Huh. I'm feeling old right now."
Girl 1: "What was campus like back then?"
Me: "Pretty much nothing like it is now."
Girl 2: "We're getting a Panda Express on campus!"
Me: "All we had was a drive thru McDonalds."
Girl 1: "Oh my God - I would have DIED!"
Girl 2: "So what are you looking for again?"
Me: "The Volunteer!GVSU office.
Girl 2: "Umm...I don't think I've heard of that."
Girl 1: "It think that's what they called it back then. Now it's just volunteering."
Girl 2: "Have you checked out the Marketplace yet?"
Me: "What is the marketplace?"
Girl1: "It's a store on campus where you can buy GVSU stuff."
Me: "Isn't the gift shop upstairs?"
Girl 2: "Is that what it was called back then? A gift shop? That's so cute!"
Me: "Yeah, well, thanks for your help. Good luck with your studies."
After I got done plucking the gray hairs from my head, I found the gift shop/Marketplace. It took me two times of weaving through the apparel to find any Alumni stuff - and it was located on one table. A sweatshirt, t-shirt, blanket, mug and a license plate holder. I'm still in financial loan debt hell and this is all you have to offer me, GVSU? Really?
With my sweatshirt and mug in hand, I checked out the other stuff in the store. In the woman's department, there was an abundance of yoga pants with cutesy little graphics and logos. The X-large size might have fit on my thigh if it was a day where I hadn't eaten anything and wasn't retaining water. Maybe.
As I stood there holding some yoga pants looking utterly perplexed at the sizing, a couple of new freshman girls were going bonkers over the yoga pants., most of which were $50+. One of the girls LOVED the pants but she really didn't want to buy them because her mom wears yoga pants. As I eavesdrop on this conversation wearing my yoga pants, I want to tell these girls that after they graduate, shit becomes real. Yoga pants are not just pants - they are a way of life. You think that SNL commercial about Mom jeans was funny? You won't think so anymore when you're in Kohl's buying Levi's with a stretch waistband.
All in all, it was great to see the campus again. Maybe I can convince Madelyne attend GVSU. Class of 2028??
July 10, 2015
BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!
I'm sure some of you have noticed that my blog hasn't been active and I haven't been participating in social media as much as I used to. Well, it's time to make my big announcement: After 36 years (almost 37), I have finally found a career I love and for that reason, I am putting "Author Megan Cyrulewski" on the shelf (pun intended.)It's a big decision, however, life kind of made the decision for me. As some of you know, after graduating from law school, I took the Bar and missed passing by ten little measly points. While I waited to retake it, I decided to sign-up for a mediation training - and fell in love. I absolutely love everything about mediation. I get to use my law degree (so I don't feel like my 6-figure student loan debt is wasted), and no two cases are ever the same.
I thought I could juggle writing and mediation but when I opened my own mediation practice a few months ago, I had no idea that I would bombarded with cases! As of right now, I have 8 open cases and two of them are court-appointed. I am working on cases right up to the time I have to pick up Madelyne from school - and I couldn't be happier! I mean, I'm sitting in my home office drinking coffee in yoga pants. I just got off the phone with a new client, confirmed a court-appointed mediation for next week, and corresponded with a party on another case. I love my job.
I am so extremely grateful for Black Opal Books for publishing my book. I love that I met new friends in FB author groups. Most important, I am glad that my book, as gritty and raw as it is, was able to help women and men in similar situations. My heart flutters every time I receive an email from someone who thanked me for writing my book. It took a lot for me to put myself out there but I wouldn't change a thing.
Don't worry, though, because I am going to keep writing! I love my blog and I am keeping it as part of my website. I will continue to share funny stories about parenting, serious stories about life, and of course, author interviews. I am opening up my blog to anyone who wants to share a story, promote their business or themselves or anything else!
Thank you to everyone for your support during the past 5 years. I'm am so blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life! I couldn't have made it this far without all of you!
So don't worry - I'm not disappearing! I will keep on writing but for now, my main focus for my career is building my mediation practice. My main focus in life is to make sure Madelyne doesn't drive me insane...I mean...make sure she has a happy childhood. :)
Meg xoox
June 24, 2015
Saying Good-Bye For the Last Time
You know, I actually battled myself on whether I would write a post about Cheryl. For those of you who don't know me personally, last week, my best friend from middle school passed away, very unexpectedly. She was only 36-years-old. To say that our group of friends was shocked is a complete understatement. I can't even imagine what her family, husband, kids, and best friend/soul sister are going through right now. And that's why I was hesitant to post this. Her death isn't about me and how I feel and I don't want to come across that way. I have to be honest when I say I didn't really know the adult Cheryl that well. We kept in touch via Facebook, but the last time I saw her was when myself, Cheryl and Cheryl's best friend, Agata, went to the wedding of a mutual friend. I was in the wedding but after dinner, I sat with them and...well...let's just say we enjoyed the open bar while our bewildered husbands watched. It was like time hadn't passed at all.
Last week when Agata told us that Cheryl had passed, I was stunned. I was home alone and sat on the couch just staring outside. It wasn't until my Mom came home and asked what was wrong when the flood gates opened. I guess I didn't believe it until I said out loud. Cheryl Freymuth (Reynolds) died. And I lost it. Cheryl had a seizure and died. She went to bed one night, had a seizure and died. I just don't understand. And it sucks that it took her death to make me realize how much I truly missed her. So that's why I'm writing this post. Just because we weren't the best of friends anymore doesn't mean the memories evaporated and my God, did we have a lot of memories.
Yesterday, I found my 8th grade yearbook. Cheryl wrote a message that took up about 4 pages. It was filled with private jokes that I had long forgotten but made me laugh hysterically when I remembered. A couple of jokes I can't seem to place but I'm sure they meant something ridiculously funny at the time. Some of our jokes:
"Can you see what I'm saying? I think you see what I'm saying." We heard this song (Ponderous by Two Nu) and thought it was the dumbest thing we ever heard. The lyrics make no sense so whenever we didn't understand something that the other was saying, we would stop and say, "Can you see what I'm saying?" And then other person would say, "I think you see what I'm saying."
"Hey you! You in the black jacket! I think she's playing hard to get." This happened at Troy Daze, the annual festival in Troy. I was wearing my black Smith Knights jacket (because that was so totally cool) and these random guys walking behind us starting catcalling. We were in 7th grade. Boys were still a mystery, especially strangers that catcalled us at Troy Daze.
"Oh my God! I forgot to take Alfred Hitchcock!" My brother, who is two years older, never hung around me when I had friends over...except for Cheryl. It wasn't a "crush" thing. That was just Cheryl. She embraced everyone and everyone was pulled into her magnetism. One night when my brother, Cheryl and I were hanging outside, all of a sudden, my brother who is a HUGE Alfred Hitchcock fan, stood up and yelled, "Oh My God!" Startled, Cheryl and I stood up too. What was going on?? "I forgot to tape Alfred Hitchcock," my brother proclaimed. The three of us had a good laugh about that one for a long time.
These are just a few of our private jokes. There were more but I think I will keep those to myself. I now keep a picture of us (the one above) on my desk as a reminder that no matter where you are in life, no matter what you are doing or how busy you may seem, you are never too busy to talk to a friend.
I've been asked in the past if I regret anything in my life and I always answer "no." I truly believe that everything that has happened in my life has led to where I am at today. Now, my answer has changed. I absolutely regret that we kept pushing off meeting for coffee because there was always a next time. Of course, now there is no next time and that's a really hard lesson to learn. I hate the fact that it took Cheryl's passing to make a lot of her friends realize that we might never get a next time.
Before I end this post, I completely forgot about a poem that Cheryl and I used to quote. She wrote it in my yearbook as a reminder to always dream:
Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.
-Langston Hughes
I love you, Cheryl. I miss you, my friend.
June 19, 2015
Guest Post: "Why is Play So Important in Cognitive Development?"
Why Is Play So Important In Cognitive Development?
Play is so often overlooked as an integral part of a childís development. In the last few years, formal education aimed at young children, has started taking precedence. However, there are many parents and teachers alike who recognize the importance of play and how it benefits an emergent mind.
A child begins the process of learning before he is born. A growing fetus can detect sounds from as young as 20 weeks and bright light from around the third trimester. Everything your child senses adds to his social, emotional and cognitive development. Thus play, in its various forms, is the perfect opportunity for your child to experience the world around him.
We can track and even guide the areas of cognitive development, by setting up age-appropriate activities in which children can play either as an individual or in a group. Many teachers use these methods in their classrooms as an added bonus to the structured curriculums. The benefit of play in the classroom is wide-spread. Not only does it provide a fun and interactive way for the child to pick up a new concept or set of skills, it gives the child opportunity to practice them through practical application.
So What Is Cognitive Development?
It ís a term that refers to the thought processes and how they are created. This generally points to the areas of intellect, memory, problem-solving, logic and general thought processing. A childís perception of the world around him and how he reacts to it is dependent on healthy cognitive.
Why Exactly Is Play So Important?
Well, it allows a child to go beyond his usual capabilities. It opens up new experiences to the child that can be overtly explored. By investigating objects, incidents and behaviors, a childís brain begins to process the information it receives. The more a child cements his new found skills, the better the results will be in other areas too.
A List of Areas In Cognitive Development That Play Benefits
ï Memory Development
Play helps a child begin to understand the sequence of things and then memorize them. This, in the long run, is greatly beneficial for a number of other things like language development and literacy skills.
ï Logical Thinking or Reasoning
Reasoning is a more complex area of cognitive function and is mastered only much later in a childís life. But in learning how to think logically, a child can begin to process abstract information and tackle problem-solving.
ï Sensory Perception and Motor Skills
The brain processes everything the body touches, tastes, smells, hears and sees. Healthy and well-developed sensory skills are vital. Developing motor skills are beneficial for movement and the way a child handles objects.
ï Language
Language begins with non-verbal communication. A child will pick up a variety of communication possibilities while playing with his peers. Non-verbal communication then evolves into spoken word. Through social play, a child will learn to speak and form sentences by listening to the way his friends are talking.
ï Visual and Spatial Processing
Learning about the space around him is an important part of a childís development. The benefit of a healthy understanding reaches far into adult life.
The best part about allowing a child to learn through play is that it doesnít require expensive day-trips or a cupboard full of toys. New experiences are always good and the child will benefit greatly from being allowed to explore their exciting new environment safely.
Supporting Research
Your babyís developing senses.
http://www.parents.com/baby/development/physical/babies-developing-senses/
Cognitive development
http://www.healthofchildren.com/C/Cognitive-Development.html
Why is play important? Cognitive development, Language development, Literacy development.
http://www.education.com/reference/article/importantance-play-cognitive-language/
A handful of fun ñ why sensory play is important for preschoolers.
http://notjustcute.com/2010/03/24/a-handful-of-fun-why-sensory-play-is-important-for-preschoolers/
Play, why itís so important:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_play-why-its-so-important_6772.bc
Valuable Lessons Young Kids Can Learn From Playing With Toys:
http://www.mommyedition.com/valuable-lessons-young-kids-can-learn-from-playing-with-toys
June 18, 2015
My Daughter's Life Should Be A Comedy Show
I was just now working on some paperwork for a case. I finished it...and then the power goes off for about 10 seconds. Long enough for me to remember I didn't save anything. So instead of rewriting it right now, I'm going to tell you about the ridiculousness of my daughter's life. So sit back, relax, and enjoy peeking into my life for a little bit:A TYPICAL MORNING
My mornings start out with the melodious voice of Madelyne yelling, "MOMMY!" When I go into her room, she says with a very prim and proper voice, "Well...good morning." Seems like a good start to the day. She gets up, dresses for the day, eats breakfast and we take off for school.
"Make your car talk," Madelyne demands from her backseat driving position.
"Mommy's car doesn't talk. Only Grandpa's car talks."
"Who is picking me up from school today?"
"Me."
Madelyne sighs. "Can you bring Grandpa's car?"
"You do realize that Grandpa makes Grandpa's car talk. Even if Mommy drives it, it won't talk."
"Why?"
Now I'm starting to get a little annoyed. I didn't have my coffee yet and I was getting tired of the questions. (Plus, I'm not a morning person.)
"Madelyne, you're capped off with the questions."
"What does capped off mean?"
"It means you're done asking questions."
"Why?"
"Because I'm tired of questions."
"But you keep answering them."
DAMN IT - why is my child so much smarter than me?
SCHOOL
Madeline goes to school 5 days a week. It's a child care/preschool facility. The teachers love her, the kids hug her, and every week she is marrying a new boy. Needless to say, she gets away with murder. So on this particular day, I walk into school and, like always, stop to talk to the center director and business manager at the front desk. They couldn't wait for me to come in.
Apparently, Madelyne decided to eat lunch at the front desk that day instead of with her peers. She told the two teachers all about a snarlfish. She described it in detail: it has a round body, a huge snout with teeth to catch little fish, it lives near the bottom of the ocean but comes to the top once in a while to get some air. Oh, and you can only find it in South America.
Now, these two extremely intelligent women, both of whom hold college degrees, had never heard of a snarlfish. So after Madelyne went back to class for her nap - because she's 4-years-old - they googled "snarlfish." I bet you are doing the same thing right now. Guess what? It doesn't exist. Madelyne made it up. No such thing as a snarlfish, my friends.
DINNER
Getting Madelyne to try new food is sometimes the most ridiculous thing in the world. We're running out of options, here. She likes Mac & Cheese, McDonald's, Pancakes, anything chocolate and most fruit. That's about it. So every night, I make a plate of what we're eating and set it in front of her. I tell her she has to try it if she wants something else (i.e. the bribery food stored in our cupboard.)
She'll look at it. Touches it. Smells it. Whines. Says she's not hungry. Leaves the table. Comes back in under a minute and repeats the process. Every time I tell her that if she just would have tried it when she first sat down, she would be eating something that she liked.
When she finally tries it, makes a yuck face and drinks a gallon of milk to wash down the disgusting food on her plate, she'll ask for something else. We dole out the praise, tell her she's a good girl and I get up to make her something else (i.e. microwave.) While I'm doing that, my mom usually asks Madelyne what she had for lunch that day at school. Madelyne looks down at her plate of grossness, looks at my mom and tells her that she had exactly what's on her plate for lunch. This happens EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. Madelyne could be eating McDonald's and my mom will ask what she had for lunch that day. Madelyne's answer: "Chicken nuggets, fries, and ketchup."
BEDTIME
If you haven't read the book, "Go the F*** to Sleep," read it. Everything in there is pretty much what every parent has thought at some point every night. Why kids fool around at night is completely and utterly beyond my level of understanding. You have on your jammies. Your bed is comfy. It's 8:30 PM. Go the f*** to sleep already!
Every Friday night, if she's been good for the week, Madelyne has movie night in my bed. I get my laptop, a bowl of popcorn and we watch a movie. Then she's allowed to sleep in my bed for the night. Maybe that doesn't sound like a big deal to some of you, however, after about two months of marriage, I kicked my ex-husband out of the bed in favor of the cats. I don't like sharing my bed with humans, only pets.
Let me tell you the ordeal every Friday night. My brother got Madelyne this stuffed horse that's huge. Big enough for her to sit on and pretend to ride. Wherever she sleeps, the horse sleeps. Plus her pillow, her water cup, and 5-6 stuffed animals that usually end up on the floor. It can be quite entertaining except that she does the exact same thing in the middle of the night.
Once in a while, maybe 3-4 times a month, I will wake up to Madelyne standing next to my bed staring at me. It's creepy, I'm not going to lie. She asks if she can sleep in my bed for the rest of the night. Because I'm way too lazy to take her back to her room, I tell her that's fine.
She runs out of the room. She runs back in with her pillow and throws it on the bed. She runs out of the room. She runs back in with her water cup and places it on my nightstand. She runs out of the room. She runs back in with one stuffed animal repeating this process 5-6 times because apparently she can only make the trip with one animal at a time. The last thing she brings in? Yes - her horse. She drags it into my room and puts it next to the bed so I'm basically sleeping with Madelyne on my right and a stuffed horse on my left. Standing up. I swear he's looking at me. It reminds me of "The Godfather."
Okay. I think I've procrastinated long enough and should probably get some work done. So I hoped you have enjoyed my little Madelyne antidotes to make you smile. :)
June 15, 2015
Guest Post: "Perspective from a Cancer Survivor" by Emily Atar
Just a short intro before I let Emily's words speak for themselves. I've known Emily since 2nd grade, however, as a lot of friendships do, we grew apart each involved in different things in life. But like a lot of us, I enjoy seeing what my high school classmates have been up to the past few (or 20) years through social media. So when Emily posted the FB status below last week, I was inspired and I really wanted to put it on my blog because you can feel her emotion through her words. I asked her if I could post it and use her name and she allowed me share her story. Thank you Emily for letting me share your journey with the social media world. ******************************************************************************************
EMILY'S STORY
June 7th is an incredibly life-changing day for me. 2 years ago today I received my shocking diagnosis of Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. 2 years ago I thought my life was going to change- but I had no idea how much it really would and how long this fight against cancer would be. On this anniversary of my diagnosis- which is also National Cancer Survivors Day- I reflect back on how far I have come, yet how much further I need to go. I am in remission, but have to take multiple chemotherapies every day/week/month. I still am not well enough to go back to the work I loved, I barely have enough energy to keep up as a wife and mother, live with a decreased immune system that has me walking on eggshells, and have pain, anxiety and other side effects from chemo (both past and present). And yet I. AM. HERE!
I know that I was able to get through this with the strength and love of my family and friends as well as by the Grace of God. I will continue to fight every single day that I have, to do my therapy in order to lower the chances that this ALL does not rear its ugly head again. And each night I thank my God for all the blessings I have and the time I have had with my family and friends. My mortality has been shoved in my face, but I choose to acknowledge LIFE. I kiss my children and tell them I love them every single day. I stop and appreciate beautiful, everyday moments. I say "yes" more often than I should. And I will continue to do so until my last breath.
I have come too close to not making it through this journey/battle/hell-on-earth; even just as recent as this past January. Spending days in the hospital and ICU has given me more perspective than I sometimes wish I had. Each morning I wake up and thank the Lord for another day to wake up to, I look to a sign that hangs in my room that states "Never Give Up", and acknowledge that I continue to be a brave, strong woman EVERY SINGLE DAY. I love harder, cry more, and take for granted nothing.
I share this perspective with my family, my friends, my Facebook acquaintances, my former work colleagues, and whomever may take the time to read this in order to help encourage you to truly try to appreciate each day you have; appreciate the people in your life; appreciate the moments in your life. Remember that silly little annoyances are simply just that. And always be kind, be kind, be kind. Because you truly don't know what battles people are going through. Everyone who I see/meet and who learn of my story say "You look so good", but they have no idea how hard it may have been to get up that morning, or how much pain I may have in my feet/hips, or that I may have had chemo that day and am exhausted and scared of another massive infection.
There are so many truly brave people out there that need the help, love and friendship from others that can provide those, and I beg you to PLEASE- be there for them any way you can. Because we all need love and friendship; comfort and encouragement; and the basic appreciation for humanity.
I also encourage you to celebrate little things and big things. Please don't bemoan your next birthday- because each night I pray to be here for my next birthday! My short term goal is to be dancing on my 40th birthday, my long term goal is to be dancing on my 90th! I pray that I get to be an old lady! So today I celebrated by going to church, and then heading to a baseball game with family and friends, and then enjoying a beautiful Washington evening.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me. Please keep any prayers coming- my hope and faith is greater now than ever before. And please, celebrate with me this life we have- today and every day. Much love. XO
June 5, 2015
When Parents Become Bullies
I wake up each morning and scroll through my Facebook before getting out of bed. Usually there are pictures of my friends' kids, pets, trending news, etc. This morning I saw the video above.
This beautiful young lady, nickname Izzy, was publicly shamed by her father. I have no idea what she did. When you watch the video, you will see that her father cut off her gorgeous long locks and asked her if it was worth it. She quietly said, "no." A few days later, this young lady who was so full of promise and potential, got out of her grandmother's car while they were stopped, ran to the bridge of a busy freeway and jumped. Witnesses said there was absolutely no hesitation on her part.
How the hell did publicly shaming our children on the Internet become a trend? This isn't the first time a parent has posted something like this and unfortunately, it won't be the last time either. I don't understand the gratification parents get out of disciplining their child this way.
Now, maybe some of you are thinking that what the father did was bad but didn't warrant his daughter to commit suicide. Well guess what? To a 13-year-old teenage girl, it was bad.
Children do things all the time without thinking first. I forged my dad's signature on a bad report card in 6th grade. The teacher didn't buy it probably because my Dad was president of the School Board and signed his name on stuff all the time. But when I decided to forge his signature, I didn't think about that. All I knew was I didn't want my parents to see those bad grades.
Obviously that is a minor incident compared to this story, however, it shows the impulsiveness of children. At that moment in time, on that bridge waiting at the light, thinking of her hair, decided to commit the ultimate impulsive act and jump to her death. It is quite simply, a tragedy.
How in the world are children supposed to be open with their parents if they are in fear of something like this happening to them? As parents, we all struggle with our fears for the future. My mom has told me that in retrospect, she had it easy because we didn't have the internet when I was growing up.
Now, kids have cell phones that they use to take pictures to shame their fellow classmates. They have Facebook where it's a popularity contest to see who has the most "friends." This is called cyberbullying and it's becoming more prevalent in today's society. When kids do it, it's not right but it is what it is. There will always be bullies. What there shouldn't be are parents becoming cyberbullies.
I want my daughter to feel comfortable coming to me if she did something wrong. I want my daughter to seek advice from me if there is a situation at her school. I want my daughter to know that there is nothing that she could ever do that would make me even consider publicly shaming her over the Internet.
I wonder how that father feels now. He killed his daughter and for what? A video on YouTube? Maybe a chance that it will go viral and he'll have his 15 minutes of fame? You can hear him at the end of the video ask his daughter, "Was it worth it?"
Your daughter killed herself because of a 15 second YouTube video that you posted to publicly shame her. Was it worth it?
This beautiful young lady, nickname Izzy, was publicly shamed by her father. I have no idea what she did. When you watch the video, you will see that her father cut off her gorgeous long locks and asked her if it was worth it. She quietly said, "no." A few days later, this young lady who was so full of promise and potential, got out of her grandmother's car while they were stopped, ran to the bridge of a busy freeway and jumped. Witnesses said there was absolutely no hesitation on her part.
How the hell did publicly shaming our children on the Internet become a trend? This isn't the first time a parent has posted something like this and unfortunately, it won't be the last time either. I don't understand the gratification parents get out of disciplining their child this way.
Now, maybe some of you are thinking that what the father did was bad but didn't warrant his daughter to commit suicide. Well guess what? To a 13-year-old teenage girl, it was bad.
Children do things all the time without thinking first. I forged my dad's signature on a bad report card in 6th grade. The teacher didn't buy it probably because my Dad was president of the School Board and signed his name on stuff all the time. But when I decided to forge his signature, I didn't think about that. All I knew was I didn't want my parents to see those bad grades.
Obviously that is a minor incident compared to this story, however, it shows the impulsiveness of children. At that moment in time, on that bridge waiting at the light, thinking of her hair, decided to commit the ultimate impulsive act and jump to her death. It is quite simply, a tragedy.
How in the world are children supposed to be open with their parents if they are in fear of something like this happening to them? As parents, we all struggle with our fears for the future. My mom has told me that in retrospect, she had it easy because we didn't have the internet when I was growing up.
Now, kids have cell phones that they use to take pictures to shame their fellow classmates. They have Facebook where it's a popularity contest to see who has the most "friends." This is called cyberbullying and it's becoming more prevalent in today's society. When kids do it, it's not right but it is what it is. There will always be bullies. What there shouldn't be are parents becoming cyberbullies.
I want my daughter to feel comfortable coming to me if she did something wrong. I want my daughter to seek advice from me if there is a situation at her school. I want my daughter to know that there is nothing that she could ever do that would make me even consider publicly shaming her over the Internet.
I wonder how that father feels now. He killed his daughter and for what? A video on YouTube? Maybe a chance that it will go viral and he'll have his 15 minutes of fame? You can hear him at the end of the video ask his daughter, "Was it worth it?"
Your daughter killed herself because of a 15 second YouTube video that you posted to publicly shame her. Was it worth it?
I find it very interesting that we have had two major stories within a month's period of time that involves a wholesome Christian family and a transgender woman who are celebrities in their own right.
