Georgi Y. Johnson's Blog: I AM HERE - Opening the Windows of Life & Beauty, page 34

Intimacy, Loneliness & Solitude

In unity, there is a solitude. It can be a solitude expanding beyond the perimeters of perception; it can be a solitude with no “other” in sight; it can be a solitude of pure love; but nonetheless it is soliltary. It is embedded in the very nature of unity.

“It would be a shame if the fear of rejection and a discomfort in loneliness and intimacy would lead us to close this gateway to unity – a gateway called solitude.”

Within the habitual psychological frame of our collective mind, loneliness is a curse. We dread it, as it is unconsciously merged with the instinctive fear of rejection. In nature, rejection is a meta-fear.

The classic fears of death, sexuality, illness and insanity, are all transcended by this meta  fear – the fear of rejection.

If we die, we experience rejection (or ejection); if we are sexually deviant in a way, an effect is social rejection; if we are ill, we are rejected, or we reject ourselves; and if we become what would be called “insane”, rejection is too often an unfortunate result.

We fear rejection for good reason: it hurts like hell. Like an energetic stab in the heart, we bleed in it. We contract in our thoughts, feelings and physical sense of space. Until we learn to relax in it and let it through and out the back, it can feel like an agony worse than death. It causes us to disconnect from the love we experience for others, from our qualities. As an energetic reflex, it slams shut the channels of expression and blocks our ability to take in. It leads to tunnel vision and despair.

Yet when we reject the pain of rejection, we actually make it worse, separating still more deeply from the whole and from the joy of being here in freedom. Allowing the pain to surface and pass; suffering it as energy, not as a phenomena which is personal; and remaining loyal to the love, the qualities, and the service of our being here are all key directions to bring freedom within this pain.

It is entirely possible to come to a freedom in form where rejection is more a curiosity and an opportunity than a final condemnation. Imagine the liberation.

Beliefs in Separation

This primal fear of rejection is based on a belief in separation, which it in turn nurtures. The unravelling of this belief in absolute separation (between the inner and outer, ourselves and the physical, ourselves and others, and ourselves and God, or the “source), is at the core of non-dual teachings.

To believe ourselves separate is to suffer, because if we are separate from the whole, then the whole dance of rejection and acceptance seems real. There is agony in this. Even total acceptance carries the shadow of its twin, rejection. In itself, it can never take away the fear. Yet we believe it, not only with our thoughts and languages, but also with the patterning of our energy in the dimension of feeling awareness.

Only a relaxation into non-separation and our inherent unity with all that is on all layers – physical, sentient and mental – punctures the illusion that keeps us in this wilderness of fear.

Reject Me Not

Rejection dances with acceptance in an ongoing spiral of form. Unity has no opposite. The unity is here, irrespective of whether something in or around us accepted or rejected at any moment.

Within this sentient universe, one of the greatest sufferings and fears is of loneliness. Yet, wherever we find loneliness, we will also find a corresponding issue with intimacy. So much so, that often a therapeutic inquiry into the fear of intimacy can be the most worthwhile direction for one who suffers loneliness.

We have beliefs about intimacy, and we put conditions on it until it is lost. We are ready to be intimate only with other humans or animals, or with particular humans or animals. We agree to intimacy only when we feel safe, accepted, or when we have a golden promise that we won’t be rejected. How much easier can be intimate with one that is dying (who will not reject you later) than one who is in the peak of life.

Recently, a spiritual teacher Benny Silverman, died. He posted regularly on Facebook until he was gone. He was intimate, open, sharing the truth of this final transition out of this life time. One of his final posts was:

“Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.”

Grasping towards acceptance and fearing rejection, we habitually make conditions that restrict our intimacy – directly compromising our authenticity and the truth of who we are.  These attempts to lay down the rules in order to avert pain spirals us into intimacy’s twin flame, loneliness.

Intimacy is not a structure, it’s an attitude. We can be intimate with our feet on the ground, with the air that we breath and the food that we eat. We can be intimate with a sunrise and with our own feeling awareness. Intimacy is a receptive choice, in itself, quite unconditional. It is about opening the windows of perception in such a way that we allow our selves to see and be seen. Above all, sufferings around intimacy involve the frustration of where we refuse to see ourselves – to put it more clearly – where we reject our selves.

Sole Purpose

Yet beyond all these dances in human form, between acceptance and rejection, loneliness and intimacy, there is a profound solitude. This is not a suffering but a friend at the core of being here. It has a holiness in it. It’s not static or confined, but very much alive.

This atmosphere of solitude, found in the depths of meditation or in the deep relaxation prior to sleep, can be so real that all the conscious activities of the day – even consciousness itself – can seem like a kind of dream happening in a factory of creation, without direct relation to this sole source of who we are.

To remain as an open channel to this solitude can bring tremendous peace in living, and a soft and easily available reserve of energy. It can moves us beyond the stressful blocks in voltage throughout our layers of form in such a manner that such stresses or blocks are less likely to form.

We were born out of, and into this solitude. We live our lives with this familiar, vast and universal solitude in the background to all our hopes and aspirations. We pass out of this world back through the wide open doors of this inner solitude.

It would be a shame if the fear of rejection and a discomfort in loneliness and intimacy would lead us to close this gateway to unity – a gateway called solitude. It can never be accepted or rejected. It will never be separate from the whole. It is open door that can allow the deepest manifestation of the source of all we are.

 

I Am Here: The Intimate Science of Perception and Spirituality – Georgi

“All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force which brings the particle of an atom to vibration and holds this most minute solar system of the atom together.”

Perception – the creative power of our universe.

– Max Plank

 

At the core of the physical dimension is a resonance – vibration, This reverberation can only occur as a pulse through the emptiness. Emptiness is the all pervading backdrop to sound which allows differentiation into speed, frequency, pitch.

This is all well and good for the scientists – but what does it mean in terms of how we experience ourselves to be? What are the implications for us in manifesting ourselves as humanity? How do these vibrations affect us in mind, heart and body? And who is the one making the noise?

In his later years, one of the greatest humanists and spiritual teachers of our time, J. Krishnamurti clearly pointed out that:

“Perception is the way of truth… If you actually perceive the narrowness of the spirit, the increasing slavery of the mind, then you will find that out of perception comes energy; and it is this energy born of perception that is going to shatter the petty mind, the respectable mind, the mind that goes to the temple, the mind that is afraid.”

 

Perception is the energy – the vibration – which is creating our world. Perception is the key to our ability to take responsibility for our direction. So what is perception, and how can it be liberated

Awakening liberates the defining restraint of memory. We awaken to that which never changes.

 

I (Consciousness)

Consciousness is energy. A shift in our consciousness, or more precisely, the liberation, realization and expansion of our consciousness can literally have an impact on our physical world.

What is being referred to is not a change in what we think, or even an evolution of how we think, but a liberation from thinking processes altogether – in such a way that a new freedom emerges to engage and disengage with thoughts according to need or passion.

This is the tremendous empowerment we feel associated with the awakening of consciousness. Very good, yet consciousness is only one form of perception. What happens when we are unconscious, or dead? What is happening when we fall asleep at night?

What about the “unconscious” (a convenient classification which dumps whole dimensions of human into the vast “not-conscious”?) What is awareness – and why does it exist as a separate word which we can intuitively feel differs from consciousness?  Could it be that through mistranslation and Western bias, we took the ancient Indian word for “perception” and made it exclusively “consciousness”?

 

AM (Awareness)

Enlightenment relates to the liberation of feelings and states, revealing the infinite light of pure being.

What then, is awareness? What about feeling? Is there a difference between who we think we are and how we feel ourselves to be? How is our felt experience also shaping the world?

This awareness or feeling of the atmosphere of “you-ness”, of love, and forms of feeling, emotion and of states of being would seem to be operating at a causal layer beyond thought and beneath consciousness.

It is affecting our direction through fundamental laws of attraction.

There is an intricate relationship between how we feel ourselves as human and what we think, make strategies and create. So much so, that if our awareness is caught in in a state of depression, it could birth a powerful mental formulation which will in turn limit our consciousness. This limited consciousness will in turn repress our awareness, leading to deeper depression. This means that the liberation of consciousness will not hold, without a willingness to also free our awareness.

All the existential energy available to us as human beings could be blocked at the level of awareness through our subtle agenda to avoid the feeling of suffering, through which we become entangled and confused with form and undergo narrowing of perception. And as Krishnamurti pointed out, a clouding of perception leads to less energy, less empowerment, less life force.

Perception through awareness is connected with opening the eyes of the heart (which have no story and no agenda) and the ears of the heart – which is all about allowing a flow of vibrations. It is the movement from playing the music, to letting the music play us. In this, the vibrations of form no longer define the one who is receiving; the one that is able to feel; the one which is able to “let it be”.

We are never that which we are perceiving – we are the one that is able to perceive. We are never the feeling, we are the one that is able to feel. We are even infinitely behind the feeling of feeling, of feeling.

Yet if consciousness itself is not an end-point, but a window, one which is in a causal duality or dance with awareness; if the chicken-and-egg spiral between head and heart is to find unity; then we must look for a third means of perception – where consciousness and awareness, love and peace, are one.

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

― C.G. Jung

HERE (Emptiness)

Perception through emptiness opens self-realization – the liberation from all illusions of self as non-absolute. All that can be seen or felt, it is not who you are. You are the one who is able to see or feel.

This third window is found through perception through emptiness – a perceptive window recognizable from the Tibetan Buddhists. Perception through emptiness is occurring within the naked reality of physical matter: through our bones, our blood, our emotions and through every passing thought.

Perception through emptiness sees and feels through a process of realization. This realization moves with an increasing clarity and empowerment within the experiential proofs that whatever is occurring in time is transient, and that whatever is held in space is transforming.

This allows a loosening of form as absolute, and introduces ourselves as the source of all creation. This layer of perception (emptiness) is that which allows both consciousness and awareness to be. It is that which allows all energy to expand or fixate. It is that which allows all form – a master-key to liberation from fear, transformation and human empowerment. Emptiness is not a dead thing – it is filled with everything that ever was, is and will be. Found intimately close to home, it is that from which all creation emerges and into which it dissolves.

Emptiness is not empty of anything accept of division. It is empty of separate existence. Through the allowance of perception through emptiness – there is the promise to become masters of the pure, physical, miraculous, transient, transforming phenomena of humanity. This process of realization is happening by virtue of the core of us – that which is not transient, not transforming. We can become that from which the vibration of all matter is arising.

 

I AM HERE – Existential Empowerment

It is irrepressible.

There is that which exists in total freedom within time and space, and which is utterly unaffected by creation.

That one, is at the core of the energy running through all windows of perception. This is the infinite and eternal energy source of who we are individually and who we are as one humanity.

As the universe exponentially expands from its core of “dark” energy, it seems this benevolent and ubiquitous emptiness is a master key for the evolution of human responsibility in the coming generation.

By Georgi Y. Johnson

 

Wormholes of the Soul – New Dimensions of Consciousness

Can you imagine the body as a portal to other dimensions?

Could being “here” be more awesome and mysterious than our habit-dulled mind tends to believe?

Where is here? Could here simultaneously be somewhere else?

When we look for the here, through physical sensation or mental concept, it tends to collapse into a strangeness. Here can be experienced directly as spooky action, (not at a distance).

As we are here, let’s take some time to inquire into space. Where are we now?

Unconscious belief structures persuade us that we reside in a space that is real as-seen, good-to-go, material, and bounded to the mechanistic laws of Newtonian physics. In this, the mind is kept small as it composes reality based on inherited ideas, identification and the struggle for individuality.

Yet modern physics is alive with questions – exploring the break-down of generations of conditioning in areas such as quantum entanglement, multiple dimensions, wormholes and the non-existence of matter.

Material particles of this material reality are now known to be 99.999999999999 percent empty. The other 0.000000000001 percent is where the rest of our present “reality” is happening – including perception, creation, past, present and future. This makes this sliver of “reality” precious stuff within the celestial form of eternity and infinity.

What are we then?

This emptiness has been described by spiritually-inclined physicists as the unified field – the deepest quantum layer of pure potentiality – the causal layer beneath all dimensions where time and space implode and explode.

Is Emptiness Abstract?

In the realm of direct experience, this unified field is not sublime, nor is it unreachable.

It’s here and now, so familiar that we can hardly allow it. In fact, the here and the now are two wormholes – one to infinity, the other to eternity. Emptiness composes over 99 percent of every experience; and is the continuum through all perception. It is the constant through all states, whether psychological, energetic, frozen, liquid or air.

In the words of Zen, this 99% is directly “under the nose”, so at one with any moment or dimension, that there is no where to move to. As Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj said, it is That, which is prior even to being, prior to consciousness, prior to identity.

Wormholes

A wormhole, or Einstein-Rosen Bridge, is a hypothetical topological feature that would fundamentally be a shortcut through spacetime. A wormhole is much like a tunnel with two ends, each in separate points of perspective. We often think of wormholes as some remote scientific postulate “out there” in the universe. Yet experientially, there is no reason why we shouldn’t consider the “in here” as an infinite potential of wormholes to other dimensions, and to other perspectives in spacetime.

In terms of visual representation, there is a remarkable resemblance between a wormhole and a chakra

Whether or not the chakra system formally exists, it does seem that through the repeated movement of consciousness and awareness through these zones of the body, experience arises of a different nature: more authentic and more expansive than the normalised experience through the physical senses. This could be a result of the generation of a field or the tunnelling through time and space through the “here-now” exploration of consciousness.

President Obama checks in at Stonehenge

What seems true, is that the intense focussing of consciousness on any cell, sensation, feeling, or apparent “object” will at a certain stage have a tunnelling effect, leading to the experience of other dimensions (or deeper, less divided layers of this dimension).

The spiritual teacher Russell Williams (Not I, Not Other than I) talks of the wormhole created through repeated meetings in his small sitting room in Manchester. On visiting him in that apparently regular house, the sense of a familiar, powerful, soulful presence of a deeper dimension is indeed striking.

In a similar way, wormholes to more essential dimensions of time and space seem to have been opened in holy sites such as cathedrals, mosques, syngogues and Neolithic monuments such as Stone Henge. When we visit these places, it can be as if we (choicelessly) stand at a portal to another dimension which we can either resist (by closing down our perception), allow, or even choose to explore. These dimensions are not “other” than this one, they become revealed as existentially present within it.

What passes through a wormhole?

Within the experience of travelling into our chakras and out the back door into Nirvana-like dimensions, or in visting Stonehenge and experiencing the effect of an infinite, timeless presence through and in us, we can ask the question: what or who, is this aspect that travels?  Who or what goes through the worm hole and who or what gets left behind?

This year, science came up with a few more discoveries to shock perception out of its physical limitation.

The discovery of a particle without mass, first postulated in 1929 as the Weyl fermion, introduces a particle that can move electrical charge faster than an electron, and that simultaneous exists as matter and anti-matter. It is at once here, in a material sense, and not here, existing in negation to its perceivable form.

This mass-less particle defies one of last laws of form – gravity, finding direction in and of itself as if containing an inner compass beyond time and space. A perfect GPS for a wormhole?

Another recent discovery is that the dividing line between the physical norms we love and know and quantum reality, doesn’t actually exist. Bells inequality theorem has been proven false, bringing quantum directly upscale to the realm of tangible.

Is Consciousness Empty?

Is consciousness empty or  is emptiness conscious?

The backdrop to our physical universe can be described as an unlimited, imperceivable, intimately interwoven part of our sense of self; the facilitator of the effects of consciousness or awareness, emerging through fundamental particles that are able to defy gravity, time and space, connecting multiple dimensions through networks of wormholes.

Sometimes, that aspect of “who we are” that passes through the worm hole has been postulated as our consciousness, liberated from identification with form.

While it seems that the potential for consciousness does pass through a wormhole (or from one dimension to another), in the wormhole, in the moment of passing through the fabric of time and space, we would seem to be unconscious. There is a perceptive “blink” (like the moment of death, deep sleep or anaesthesia) after which consciousness is able to reawaken elsewhere.

Something beyond (and at source) of consciousness is the vehicle through which consciousness can pass through time and space. As the source of unlimited potentiality, the potential for consciousness does not get excluded from the unified field. Consciousness reawakens already with the first layers of perception or sentient experience.

Again, THAT which precedes and underlies consciousness seems to be the deeper vehicle to freedom. Consciousness, even in its identification with itself as consciousness, needs to release identification in order to access the unified field. It needs to surrender itself, to leap into the dark, to release attachment to its own “seeing” or “sensing”.

The Paradox of the Unified Field

Is consciousness the unified field? A lecture from Prof. John Hagelin, SAND,

The argument is often made that awareness is the container of all experience and exists independently of all experience.

It is postulated that no experience can exist independently of awareness, therefore awareness is absolute.

If we are not aware of it, it doesn’t exist. It’s not too far from “I think, therefore I am.”

The use of rudimentary experience to define awareness is upside down. It arises from a perspective based on experience, not on freedom.

Even pure, liberated awareness is an experience, the moment it is differentiated from other kinds of experience. As experience, it is communicated as an agenda – one of the first ways we try to dictate life through using the mind to control

Experience can not be the defining factor of truth, as it is always an after-effect of something prior. For example, we bump our head, and then get the experience of pain. The pain is an after-effect of the bump, not the cause. The blowing out of the candle does not prove the draft from the window. The draft from the window is that which shows that the flame can be extinguished.

In identifying consciousness as absolute, we can come to a space that we need to pinch ourselves to know that we are “here”. Consciousness is not separable from its contents.

Out of Unknowing, Knowing arises

As the Italian philosopher Prof. Mauro Bergonzi explains, “It’s like searching for the darkness with a flash light. Everywhere you point the light, you see only light, so you conclude that darkness doesn’t exist. But sooner or later, the batteries will wear out, and the darkness will be anyway revealed.” Consciousness is an effect of the unified field, it is not of itself the ground of the inherent unity between dimensions.

In meeting with Mauro Bergonzi, Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj asked the philosopher how he experiences himself. “As pure awareness.” Mauro answered. Nisargadatta took special care to show him he has to fall further back, to surrender more inward, to give up even on the experience of pure awareness.

The paradox is that experience is no longer there, because awareness is eclipsed. So how can we know anything about it?

In a reversal of perceptive patterns, our information now comes from a realization of the imprints, or effects of the imperceivable through the realm of experience. The  imperceivable leaves its imprint on form.

With the re-emergence of perception, an imprint of THAT which is at the source of perception is felt, often in liberated perception, (elevated states of consciousness or awareness) vitalized experience, and the amplification of energetic patterns where we are still entangled.

All experience is the effect of something beyond experience, beyond perception, beyond the perceivable. In the same way, all knowing is an effect of surrender into the unknown. We cannot know something that is already known. It is always a function of surrender to mystery.

That which is prior to consciousness is that on which consciousness entirely depends. It is beyond reflection, before the mirror. The moment it sees itself, it becomes conscious. It’s reflection is already an imprint, a shadow of source.

The imperceivable contains the potential for consciousness, but it’s not defined by consciousness, it so much more than that. Consciousness is just the tip of the metaphorical iceberg of existence. The imperceivable is at the source of our consciousness, beyond the parameters of time and the boundaries of space. It never moves. It’s not a dead end, although our minds freeze it with fear-based beliefs around death. When its uncovered it’s not stranger. It excludes nothing. We anyway all come there micro-second by micro-second, now and at the hour of our physical death. It is our original state, but it’s not a state. It is the source of all states.

When experience is realized as effect and not cause; experience itself transforms. The senses become free and less entangled; the body becomes realized as a fluid miracle; and the entity that passes through dimensions emerges as not passing at all, but as perfectly still, as other dimensions pass through it.

Wherever we travel, we are always here. We are not going anywhere, ever. Even though multiple dimensions, impressions and experiences may pass through us.

The surrender of consciousness, now and at the hour of our death, is the collapse inwards to the core of who we are. It is the precise movement that allows transformation and the unveiling of parallel dimensions.

It is at source as the indestructible, unified, omnipresent source of all. As the originating source of perception, it liberates consciousness itself.

Sri Nisargadatta predicted that his teachings would be validated by science. Month by month, this is happening. What remains is for we humans to validate the wonders of quantum science by allowing them into the flow of all we are.

Introduction to Spiritual Psychology, Israel: December 24-28, 2015

We are happy to announce the opening of  the first modeule of level 1 of the Spiritual Psychology Education in Israel.

December 24-28, 2015

The 5 day seminar will take place at the Chashymie Center in Zichron Yaakov, Israel.

A limited amount of accommodation is available, and after registration we can assist you in finding a place to stay, if you choose to sleep in Zichron during the workshop.

Each day is from 9:00 – 17:00, with a lunch break in which a vegetarian meal is available.

Modules in the Spiritual Psychology education are given twice a year, with certification at each stage, and graduate certification at the end of each level and at professional certification after 7 years. The education is licensed and certified by the International School of Spiritual Psychology (ISSP) based in the Netherlands. Chashymie is a partnership of Bart ten Berge and Georgi Y. Johnson.

Module 1 gives knowledge of the subtle bodies, the chakra system, and includes exercises, meditations and partner work

The cost for the 5 days, including lunch and refreshments is: 2350 NIS.

To register for the Seminar, you are invited to pay the 300 NIS deposit.

Read more about the Spiritual Psychology Education

Introduction to Spiritual Psychology, Israel: December 24-28, 2016

We are happy to announce the opening of  the first modeule of level 1 of the Spiritual Psychology Education in Israel.

December 24-28, 2016

The 5 day seminar will take place at the Chashymie Center in Zichron Yaakov, Israel.

A limited amount of accommodation is available, and after registration we can assist you in finding a place to stay, if you choose to sleep in Zichron during the workshop.

Each day is from 9:00 – 17:00, with a lunch break in which a vegetarian meal is available.

Modules in the Spiritual Psychology education are given twice a year, with certification at each stage, and graduate certification at the end of each level and at professional certification after 7 years. The education is licensed and certified by the International School of Spiritual Psychology (ISSP) based in the Netherlands. Chashymie is a partnership of Bart ten Berge and Georgi Y. Johnson.

Module 1 gives knowledge of the subtle bodies, the chakra system, and includes exercises, meditations and partner work

The cost for the 5 days, including lunch and refreshments is: 2350 NIS.

To register for the Seminar, you are invited to pay the 300 NIS deposit.

Read more about the Spiritual Psychology Education

Extended list for I-Exist 2016 Accommodation

This list is offered in good faith. We do not check or recommend particular B&B accommodation. Check prices. 

Some B&B’s are not “officially approved” but are offered by local people in their own homes for the benefit of Conferees. In the first instance please contact:

Glastonbury Tourist Information Centre for inspected accommodation – T: 01458 832954, F: 01458 832949, E:info@glastonburytic.co.uk or www.glastonbury.co.uk

B&B’s, Self-catering, Hotels and Youth Hostels: 

Alan Warr, Hedgehog House, 3 Wells Rd, Glastonbury – Singles and doubles, ring for prices – T: 01458 833067,M: 07835 522582

Anjuli Kaur Double bedroom £30 night, Windmill Hill Tel 07961105780

Anna Brake, Hillside, Ashwell Lane, Glastonbury, BA6 8BG – Self-catering, all en-suite, separate flat – T: 01458 833809, M: 07989 393407, www.glastonburyproperties.co.uk

Appletree House, 27 Bere Lane, Glastonbury, BA6 8BD – From £75 for double room – T: 01458 830803, www.appletreeguesthouse.org.uk

Arimathean Retreat, 59 High Street, Glastonbury – Lovely B&B, central, tranquil, secluded garden, great breakfast in farmhouse-style kitchen. Single, Twins, Doubles; 1 en-suite – T: 01458 830 230, E: arimatheanretreat@gmail.com, www.arimatheanretreat.com

Bay Tree House Guest House, 16 Norbins Rd, Glastonbury – £22 pppn room only or £27 pppn with continental buffet breakfast – T: 01458 834972, M: 07788401157, E: Sandienicholson1@btinternet.com

Berachah, Well House Lane, Glastonbury – On slopes of Tor. Single £40, twin and double for £80 – T: 01458 834214, www.berachah.co.uk

Camelot Retreat, Valerye, 4 Meadow View, Glastonbury – Kingsize double, double, twin, single rooms – T: 01458 834876, M: 07974 119754, www.camelotretreat.com

Carey Richardson, The Glastonbury White House, 21 Manor House Rd, Glastonbury BA6 9DF – Luxury doubles – T:01458 830886, www.theglastonburywhitehouse.com

Christina Oxley, Havyatt Cottage, Edgarley, Glastonbury – All female B&B, double en-suite, twin room and double with shared bathroom, cooked breakfast – T: 01458 832520, E: Christinahavyatt@hotmail.co.uk, www.havyattcottage.co.uk

Dan Vincent, Millstream Bed and Breakfast, Glastonbury – Ground floor self-contained double bed with en-suite bathroom, including a walk-in double shower. You have your own front door. £60 per night – T: 01458 835301, www.millstreambandb.co.uk

Denise Abbot, The Cubby Hole, Bere lane, Glastonbury – 2-3 people sharing £200/week – T: 01458 832377, www.thecubbyhole.co.uk

Diane Milstein, Norbins Rd, Glastonbury – From £28 – £35 pppn. Help yourself to breakfast – T: 01458 833577 E:diana.milstein@me.com Glastonbury Backpackers, Market Place, Glastonbury – Hostel accommodation £16.50 per night. Double or twinfrom £35-£60. En-suite £55-£60 – T: 01458 833353, www.glastonburybackpackers.com

Hawthorns Hotel, Northload Street, Glastonbury – Single from £35, double from £80 – T: 01458 831255, www.hawthornshotel.com

Healing Waters Sanctuary, 1 Roman Way, Glastonbury – Retreat Centre, B&B from £40 pppn – T: 01458, 835859/834721, E: mailto:info@healing-waters.co.uk, www.healing-waters.co.uk

Honeysuckle Farm, Cinnamon Lane, Glastonbury – Luxury self-catering £95-150 per night. 3 x Cottages sleep 4-8 people, check rates on website – T: 01458 831354, www.honeysucklefarmcottages.co.uk/

Iona Jones, 78 Tor View Avenue, Glastonbury T: 07813082195 Lovely double room overlooking garden, facilities to make your own meals. Room only £25 single occupancy, £35 double.

Jenny Dean, Tighe na Briaghe, Old Wells Rd, Glastonbury, BA6 8ED. 01458 831454 B&B 1 double, 1 single £30 pppn, no smoking – blackpanther369@googlemail.com

Julia, 16 Silver St, Glastonbury, BA6 8BS – B&B with twin and single room, £25 pppn room only, £30 with breakfast– T: 01458 830253, M: 07980332607, www.juliasilverstreet.co.uk

Justine Bonner, Jasmin Cottage, 10 Manor House Road, Glastonbury – En-suite double and twin vegetarian. Doubles from £60 per night – T: 01458 832535, www.jasmincottage.co.uk

Kath Watson, ‘Coig Deug’, 15 Helyar Close, Glastonbury, Shared bathroom, T: 01458 835945, www.coigdeug.co.uk/

The Lantern Tree, 19 Manor House Road, Glastonbury – Candy & Drew T: 01458 833455, www.thelanterntree.co.uk

Lillah Sanoam, 37 Monington Rd, Glastonbury – 5 mins walk into town. Double room only, in shared house, quiet with garden room £25/pppn – T: 01458 898583

Lynda Parsons, Parsnips B&B, 99 Bere Lane, Glastonbury – 2 x doubles £65, 1 twin en-suite £70, Single £55, T: 01458 835599 E l.parsons@virgin.net, www.parsnips-glastonbury.co.uk

Magdalene House, Magdalene Street, Glastonbury – Luxury accommodation £80 per room per night night, £60 for single occupancy –T: 01458 830202, www.magdalenehouseglastonbury.com

The Oak House, Louise Wheat, The Oak House, 22 Silver Street, Glastonbury, Somerset. BA6 8BS oakhouseglastonbury@gmail.com. Brand new, architect-designed, gorgeous one-bedroom house, £300 to £620 per week, 01458 833537

Mrs Sarah Oliver, Melrose House, Coursing Batch, Glastonbury BA6 8BH. T: 01458 834706 E: info@melrosebandb.co.uk www.melrose-bandb.co.uk.

Paddington Farm Trust, Glastonbury – 43 acre organic farm situated at the back of the Tor. Accommodation in our Longhouse £20 per person per night, sleeps 21 – T: 01458 832752, www.paddingtonfarm.co.uk

Pilgrims B&B, The Priestess House, Central Glastonbury – Traditional and Veg breakfasts. Clare or Brian T: 01458 834722, www.pilgrimsbb.co.uk

Rosie Rose, Tor Leaze, Fishers Hill, Glastonbury, BA6 8AH Tel 01458741198 07836268546 Twin rm £20 per person, double for two £40, £25 single in twin, £30 in double, use of kitchen, sacredspirals@hotmail.com

Sarah Orme, Lower Coxbridge, Coxbridge, BA6 8LG – Lovely, rural, 2 miles to Glastonbury 1 double, B&B or annexe with double bedroom and sitting room (sleeps 4) or barn for two. T: 01458 850805, http://www.somersetstudiospace.co.uk/...

Shekinashram, Dodd Lane, Glastonbury – Ashram & Holistic Retreat Centre, Singles £32, doubles/ensuite £55-65, double yurt £45, shared cabin £19 (other variations possible, please ask for rates), includes breakfast – 01458 832300, www.shekinashram.org.

Small roundhouse in my back garden in Baltonsborough and is rustic and beautiful, with a wood burner and double futon. It’s £22 per night. Use of toilet and bath shower in my house 100 feet away. My numbers are 01458851095 or 07932550795 if anyone needs a place. Julia Nussbaum julianussbaum@yahoo.co.uk

Spirals, 6 Ashwell Lane, Glastonbury – 2 double rooms with gorgeous views and lovely breakfast – T: 01458 830477, www.thespirals.co.uk

Sue Needham, The Little House of Art, Glastonbury – An art gallery with beds! Located 2 mins from the centre of town – T: 01458 830485, M: 07793055328, www.littlearthouse.co.uk

Tordown B&B, 5 Ashwell Lane, Glastonbury- 15 min walk to town, from £40 pppn. Double, Twin ensuite, Single – T: 01458 832287, www.tordown.com

William Knight S/C cottages and town house – Self-catering accommodation 50 yards from town centre. Five houses sleeping 4-5 people – T: 01458 835144, www.glastonburyholidayhomes.com

Caravan & Camping: 

The Isle of Avalon Caravan Park, Godney Rd, Glastonbury, BA6 9AF – T: 01458 833618

Old Oaks Touring Park, Wick Farm, Wick Glastonbury – T: 01458 831437, www.theoldoaks.co.uk

I-Exist 2016 FAQ

Getting to and from Glastonbury


What accommodations are fun and affordable?


I’m worried I’m not strong enough to keep up. How strenuous is it?


Will you give background information on the places we see and visit?


Food and Drink


Entrance tickets and other costs


Driving on the left? AGH!


Getting There

If you are planning to fly in, the sooner you book, the cheaper. The closest airport to Glastonbury is Bristol, although there tend to be more bargain deals to London’s main airports (Luton, Gatwick, Heathrow and Southend). When you are registered, you will be invited to a Google Doc. to fill out details. At the same place, you can see who else is flying in where, with the possibility of sharing rides or car rentals.

By public transport, it’s important to order coach and/or train tickets in advance. This can make a dramatic difference in cost. Castle Carey is the nearest train station to Glastonbury. From there it is possible to travel by bus (line 667) to Glastonbury.

Keep in touch so we can make travel as easy as possible for everyone!

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Places to Stay

Camping is the cheapest option – with UK campsites these days boasting good facilities are Wifi. (It’s also a way to sink deep into nature!) There is the Isle of Avalon Campsite, and the Paddington Farm organic camp site (which can cost as little as 7BP a head).

If you’re looking for the more relaxed and traditional B&B, check prices first at AIRBNB, where there are many delightful options, (including self-catering).

Some of our guests are already booked at St Annes B&B, so it’s full already. But the delightful chef and host Mathura has another B&B across the road, which is vegetarian and worthwhile. Contact St Annes, for more information about it!

Last we heard, there are still rooms available within the guest houses of the Chalice Well Gardens. As this is our venue for the last two days, it could be lovely to stay there (beyond the astounding beauty of the gardens and magic of the wells).

In general, try to be within Glastonbury itself, as there is more fun and more practical in terms of meetup times for venues and excursions.

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Physical Health

There are many participants who are older and have physical limitations, so we make every effort to provide enjoyable, fulfilling lighter options to the tougher walks. We will divide the group when needed for easier routes etc. As long as we are aware of the limits of each participant, we truly believe we can make this fun for everyone. So communication is the most important factor in planning!

The most strenuous of the activities are:

•Climbing Glastonbury Tor (it’s a short steep climb but is really worthwhile – the perspective is amazing – and can be taken slowly)

•The processional walk through the rocks of Avebury (it’s a longish walk but on relatively flat ground)

•The Wookey Hole hike (This is on Saturday afternoon. It has its challenging moments but we are happy to make an alternative route for part of the group. We all meet up at the pub at the end. The intention is to absorb the energy of the land there, more than to exhaust the body! )

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History and Information

Year be year, we love to share with you what we know and learn about this incredible area of our planet and these timeless sites that stand as monuments to our human history. Much of the program is attuned to the places we visit in terms of spiritual/energetic content. Over time, the standard history of the places we visits expands, including more esoteric insights we have learned from local residents. It also gets updated according to archeological discovery, which continues to this day!

In general, we really enjoy this expanding pool of knowledge and warmly invite participants to dive in and share from their own learning, discoveries and open questions. This is part of the richness of I-Exist!

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Food & Drink

We will see plenty of Glastonbury pubs and Bart insists on preparing his delicious soups for us on the days when we are on site in Glastonbury. Contrary to the general reputation of British food, the eating options for evening meals and Glastonbury are surprisingly good. Glastonbury boasts Britain’s best Knights Fish and Chip Shop (offering gluten-free and vegetarian options; and pubs such as Who’d A Thought It are quite yummy with a warm and welcoming alternative atmosphere.

There are also heaps of vegan and vegetarian eating options in town. Eating out is not always cost effective, or what we want after a lot of process work, so if you recognize thism consider self-catering options as places to stay. Sometimes the comfort of our food and the privacy of a bed and some TV is just what we need. There are grocery shops in town, or you could accompany us on one of the shops for group supplies in the bigger stores on the outskirts of town.

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Entrance tickets and other costs

All costs of entrance tickets, where applicable, are included in the price of the retreat, according to the program. Costs for transport to sites at a distance such as Wells and Stonehenge are also covered by us. If planning means that we ask you to take passengers in your rented car, you will be reimbursed the price of petrol, per head for the journey (and warmly thanked for driving).

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Driving on the Left is freaking me out. What can I expect?

Driving on the left is much easier than we might expect. This is partly because the whole dimension of driving in the UK is on the left, so it’s intuitive to go with the flow. For a while, you might be opening the window instead of changing gear (the drivers seat is also the opposite and is on the right), but the adjustment can happen very easily. Take it slow at first. British drivers are relatively considerate (it’s the only country where we’ve seen a large sign asking motorists to queue in the fast lane!).

The points of vulnerability are roundabouts (circles), where it’s important to look to the right for traffic, not left; and empty roads with T-junctions where there is a risk of forgetting which side of the road to get on.

Driving in the UK is fun. Parking tickets much less. Consult with us about safe places to park in Glastonbury to avoid the traffic wardens!

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What is the Mother Wound?

The mother wound is the pain of being designated either as a woman or man as passed down through generations in patriarchal cultures. It includes the dysfunctional coping mechanisms that are used to process that pain. Contrary to the popular thought, the mother wound effects both daughter and sons, and is embodied by both mothers and fathers.

“The Mother Wound is not about restricting our love for our mothers, it’s about liberating love. Liberating love from the conditions set on it by the one we imagine our mother to be.”

-Georgi

From the family kitchen to the organization of government, from our first ‘hello’ after an experience of pure unity with another human being, to our philosophy of education, the mother wound is playing out. It can be found embedded as the core shock of separation from unity, or embodied as all that blocks us from experiencing unconditional freedom, naturalness, honesty, love and peace in active form.

The pain of the Mother Wound emerges choicelessly, at a preconscious level, as we absorb the stress hormones of the mother nestled in physical unity deep inside the womb. It echoes through the first shock of birth, the sting of air on the newborn skin, and the appearance of physical space between our body and that of the mother. It stands up in all that which disallows reunion through manifestation in separate form. At the core level, it shows up as the unprocessed, disallowed pain of physical and sentient separation.

Later, the Mother Wound gets embodied and reaffirmed through social and psychological archetypes and stereotypes. It gets fed back through the environment, and passed between us and on to future generations. A consequence is a deep imbalance between active and receptive and a collective prohibition on moving with pure allowance. What is at stake is the fundamental allowance of our unarguable right to exist here, in naturalness as human brothers and sisters.

The mother wound can manifest as:

Lack of naturalness in the here and now,  because naturalness will threaten others; OR moving with entitlement, privilege and moving without empathy towards others.
Having a high tolerance for poor treatment from others; OR treating the needs of others as irrelevant if they are not in service of yourself.
Shame OR disgust at the behavior, naturalness or sexuality of others.
Guilt OR accusation towards the other who is seen as responsible for the pain.
Emotional care-taking; OR emotional neglect.
Toxic competition and comparison; OR deep authority issues with whoever is the external authority of the moment.
Self-sabotage; OR narcissism.
Being overly rigid and dominating; OR “giving up” on whole dimensions of life, such as professional or domestic.
Conditions such as eating disorders, anxiety, depression and addiction.
Loneliness.
Despair and senselessness, a seemingly bottomless rift of inherent separation.
Intense fear around revealing authentic feelings and emotions.
Insatiable ambition, ensnarement in the duality of success and failure.

For daughters, the cultural atmosphere of female oppression puts daughters in a “double bind.”

According to pioneer of understanding the Mother Wound Bethany Webster:

“If a daughter internalizes her mother’s unconscious beliefs (which is some subtle form of “I’m not good enough”) then she has her mother’s approval but has in some way betrayed herself and her potential. However, if she doesn’t internalize her mother’s unconscious beliefs in her own limitations but rather affirms her own power and potential, she is aware that her mother may unconsciously see this as a personal rejection. The daughter doesn’t want to risk losing her mother’s love and approval,  so internalizing these limiting, unconscious beliefs is a form of loyalty and emotional survival for the daughter. It may feel dangerous for a woman to actualize her full potential because it may mean risking some form of rejection by her mother.

This is because the daughter may unconsciously sense that her full empowerment may trigger the mother’s sadness or rage at having had to give up parts of herself in her own life. Her compassion for her mother, a desire to please her, and a fear of conflict may cause her to convince herself that it’s safer to shrink and remain small.”

Among daughters, the mother wound includes the pain of

Rejection: feeling rejected due to an inherent inner flaw
Dread: an apprehension of punishment for expression
Irrational fear: an inability to feel safe and relax
Attenuation:  an inner prohibition on taking space or time.
A sense of lack, deficiency or being cheated by “the world”
Mythological thinking: replacing grounded happenings with mythological interpretations (bypassing the pain)
Betrayal: a background atmosphere of a-priori betrayal

Together with daughters, sons also have their share in the double bind. They inherit the twin obligation to fulfil the male role of the father: taking care, making good, providing safety and protection, being “strong”,  while at the same time being pushed to do this according to the male form – through taking the position of the patriarchal ‘abuser’.

By trying to compensate the sacrifice made by the mother for father and children, the son has to move into separation; and out of the unity with the mother. Painfully, just as with the daughter, this pain is not here for the child to fix. A child cannot replenish the manifestation void in either parent.

Some manifestations of the mother wound in sons:

Sexual promiscuity and shame, arising from the repression of natural sexuality and loyalty conflicts
A sense of inherent inner condemnation, unworthiness, or never being good enough.
A feeling of unbounded loneliness in the struggle to “take care”
Issues with other male authority figures – projection of the forbidden inner abuser on an external power figure
Intense distrust of women, darkness and formlessness, as if constantly betrayed.
Addiction to substances to attempt to replenish the inner void of separation.
Entitlement and pretense (lack of empathy). Belief that the respect of the name in the public eye is more important than inner worth (self abandonment)
Compulsively judgmental, beyond rationality.

These gender-based limitations of form and manifestation are actively passed down and affirmed (consciously and unconsciously) by mother, father, family, education, religion and society at large. They can be healed and liberated not through trying to change the character or condition of our birth parents or colleagues, but only through a willingness to heal the stagnated energy of the mother wound within ourselves. Much is at stake in this, including:

Our own happiness, ability to manifest and freedom in form
Taking out our part in perpetuating the suffering of the mother wound around us and in our own children
The release of the limitations unconsciously laid down on our ability to receive life, vitality and to find fulfillment through living.

In future posts, we will move more deeply into techniques for working with and healing the mother wound, in ourselves and in others. The latter will always begin with the former. These layers of affliction (or blocked energy) are personal, intimate and partly unconscious. Allowing these layers of pain and vulnerability requires courage.  Freedom from repression within our own energy field is essential in order to be of service to others, (including our mothers)

See also:

How the Mother Wound makes discord of nonduality
The spirituality of the Mother Wound

How the Mother Wound Makes Discord of Nonduality

One of the blessings of naming “masculine” and “feminine” aspects of spirituality is that space is created to name afflictions, accept differentiation, and release hidden beauty. Out of this unrepressed spaciousness,  new opportunity for inner harmony and unity can emerge.

Earlier:

What is the Mother Wound, anyway?
The Spirituality of the Mother Wound

One of the curses about dividing spirituality between the genders is confusion, as if spiritual qualities and dimensions are being shared out, in a manner which is far from authentic.

In human form we are all an exquisite harmony of male and female aspects. Yet in opening the differentiation of male and female, the wisdom of nonduality can get obscured in a rising of the energy of pain.

The gender split is a Pandora’s box that when opened can unleash both Satan and his Wife. It can feel, in terms of evolution, like one step forwards, three backwards.

When inquiring into the Mother Wound, it is paramount to stress that this is a wound of humanity. It’s shared by both men and women, with only subtle variation. Not only this, but it is shared by the male aspect and the female aspect within ourselves. We are all children of the mother, and the wound of that primal separation plays out in dark harmony between us all. Where there is too much creation, the perfect reaction will be an equal amount of destruction. This is how polarity plays out in the world of form.

Each movement within creation takes form through a perfect attunement of active and receptive or push and pull. For example, the movement of an arm through space has a certain speed which is a direct function of release and restraint.

If we hit our hand on the table with full force. We will get back a totally equivalent degree of pain in the body. If this pain is not allowed or received, then we are likely to do the same thing again, causing damage to the whole.

In the world of form, receptivity (the female aspect) is the container of creation, form and movement. Let us give some examples:

In reproduction, the female aspect contains the male aspect (sperm). The incubation happens within the female body. Out of this, she births both male and female, herself and the father.
In communication, there is an interchange of speaking and listening. Yet the whole conversation is “heard” by the unified listener of all parties (the receptive, female aspect).
In physical movement, navigation depends on the space between, not the objects in the way. Receptivity (the female aspect) contains both objects and space.
In vision: we can actively choose where to focus our eyes, yet that choice is itself dependent on the reception of the whole vista.
In thought: our thinking can seem to be all powerful. Yet thought is utterly dependent both on the silence between thoughts and the witnessing of them. Both these factors are receptive.
Manifestation depend on reception of need, environmental feed back and the allowance of inner compulsion. All these are aspects of the inner feminine.
Transformation depends on the ability to let go, and the release of the holding of temporal form. Whether externally or internally, this mechanism of release depends on female aspect.
The physical universe, (from the cellular level through to the birth and death of planets) is formed through a precise interplay of creation and destruction. The container of this interplay is the feminine aspect. The birth process is a strong physical example of this.

Allowance, acceptance, release, receptivity are critical to the world of form in moving into alignment and harmony with the wider whole. The very balance between active and receptive, creation and destruction, is contained within the female aspect. As such, the Mother Wound and its multi-layered impact is found at the causal layer of suffering.

Rejection or repression of the female aspect has the direct effect of ignorance, loss of vitality, illusion and suffering.

The bypassing, marginalization and derogation of the female, or the mother – whether socially, personally or internally – through an unconscious allegiance to “God the Father” as a causal source of authority – creates imbalance across human endeavor. It frustrates evolution, nourishes conflict, and brings humanity awkwardly to its knees as a misfit within natural harmony and universal law.

In New Age spirituality, this imbalance is found in the absolutist view of light as the end-point of definitions of source.

Although light can seem to be non-physical, it is actually still composed of physical elements: it has form. The individual photon is birthed from the darkness and to darkness it returns.

The metaphoric repression of this darkness (the great receiver and source), is a fundamental example of imbalance between male and female aspects of life. It is shocking that even in non-dual circles, darkness seems to be demonified in a manner which is reminiscent of the witch hunts of former generations.

Darkness is in actuality, unreflected light, but scientific knowledge is again way ahead of the evolution of our primitive, collective psychology.

The Male Aspect and the Mother Wound

One of the blessings of naming “masculine” and “feminine” aspects of spirituality is that space is created to name afflictions, accept differentiation, and release hidden beauty. Out of this unrepressed spaciousness,  new opportunity for inner harmony and unity can emerge.

One of the curses about dividing spirituality between the genders is a polarization and confusions, as if spiritual qualities are being shared out, in a manner which is far from authentic of true. The wisdom that in human form we are all an exquisite harmony of male and female aspects gets lost. The realization that even in human form, form does not define us and that we are neither held by the forms of male or female but both and at the same time neither, gets obscured in the rising of the energy of pain.

The gender split is a Pandora’s box that when opened can unleash both Satan and his Wife. It can feel, in terms of evolution, like one step forwards, three backwards.

In looking at the Mother Wound, it is therefore paramount to stress that this is a wound of humanity. It’s shared by both men and women, with only subtle variation. Not only this, but it is shared by the male aspect and the female aspect. We are all children of the mother, and the wound of that primal separation plays out in dark harmony between us all.

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