Dennis Cardiff's Blog: Poetry and Prose by Dennis Cardiff, page 5

Gravy Stains

.

.

24 July 2012

This morning  Joy was sitting in her usual spot. Sausage Fingers Shawn was leaning against the railing talking to her. Shawn was looking very dapper in his Hawaiian shirt and khaki shorts. I couldn’t take my eyes off his tattoos that stretched from shoulder to wrist on both arms. The design was an intricate west coast Haida motif.

“Joy said, “I was surprised to see Hippo at six thirty, this morning. I asked him where he was going. He said, ‘To work!’ I’ve never seen him start that early before.”

I said, “I think that Andre had a talk with him.”

“I think so,” agreed Joy. “One morning he’d only made a quarter. He came across the street to bum a smoke. He saw a lady bending over his cap. He thought she’d made a drop, but she’d taken his quarter.”

“You’d think,” said Shawn, “that a person whose sole occupation was to collect money, would know enough to take care of it.”

Joy said,”I saw a guy this morning with two twenties hanging out of his back pocket. I shouted at him, but he didn’t hear me.”

“When I was in Israel,” said Shawn I saw a number of people with wallets half out of their back pockets. I was walking with a friend and he saw a twenty on the ground. He bent down to pick it up and a guy yelled at him, ‘That’s mine, it’s there for a reason.’ My friend said, ‘Okay,’ and backed off. I guess it was part of a sting operation to catch pickpockets. The guy you saw this morning was probably there to lure pickpockets. You don’t see it too much here, but in Montreal and New York there are guys who are so smooth they can grab your wallet and watch without you knowing it. I know, it happened to me. That’s why I don’t wear a watch.”

I said, “Did you notice that we have our benches back in the park?”

“Yeah,” said Joy, “I watched them putting them in. I said to one of the workmen, ‘You could have wiped them off before you reinstalled them. One of them has pigeon shit on it already.’ He said, ‘Sorry ma’am, we don’t wipe benches.’ Why would they? We’re just skids.

“There’s one that you have to be careful of. It’s not securely fastened to the base. If you lean back too far, you could end up in the bushes.”

I asked Joy, “Did you speak to the housing people from the Salvation Army yesterday?”

“No, I left early.”

Chester stopped by. Joy said, “Okay people, I’m too popular. I’ve only made four bucks this morning. I don’t know what happened to my money. When I got home last night all I had was a quarter.”

I decided to leave to let Joy get on with her panning. “I’ll see you at noon, Joy. Bye, Shawn, Chester.”

…

At the benches today were Hippo, Shakes and Andre. How’s everyone doing?” I asked.

Hippo said, “I made a buck twenty-five and I started work at six thirty this morning.”

Andre said, “I made the price of a bottle and lent Joy three dollars and change so she could buy a bottle. It’s the first time I know of that Joy’s had to borrow money to buy a bottle. On top of that, I got a sixty-five buck ticket for panhandling. I saw the cop coming, so I scooped the change out of my cap. He pulled up at the curb and asked me what I was doing. I said, ‘Officer, I’m just eating my breakfast and drinking my coffee. He said, ‘Why is your hat out?’ I said, ‘My mother brought me up in a Christian house and insisted that we always remove our hats before eating.’ He said, ‘I’m going to write you a ticket for panhandling. What’s your address?’ I said, ‘I’m not panhandling, officer. There’s no money in my cap. I’m homeless, I have no fixed address, but I’m staying at dumpster number two behind Starbucks.’ He said, ‘You’re not going to pay this ticket are you?’ I said, ‘No sir, I’ll probably use it as a fire starter for my barbecue.”

Shakes had gone to the hotel to use the bathroom. When he returned he said, ‘Dennis, see these pants? Yesterday they were white, then someone gave me a plate of roast beef and gravy.”

Andre said, “Yeah, Shakes ate all the roast beef and what gravy he didn’t spill all over himself, he gave to me. I love that dark chicken gravy, but it doesn’t agree with me. I had the shits and the farts all night. I was wearing this same tee shirt. See, no gravy stains, it all went in my beard.

“Weasel and Little Jake were both being assholes. Weasel kept calling me a goof and Jake backed him up. With the back of my hand I hit them both with one swat. Weasel said it again, so I got him in a headlock and let my elbow do the rest.”

I said, “I remember the video of you on YouTube – St Patrick bar fights 2010. I saw that you used some karate moves.”

“I know karate, tai kwon do, tai chi. I use them all. That video was taken at the Foggy Dew. There was a line up to get in, so I was panning the line. I think I must have made four hundred that night. There was one asshole in line that was making trouble for everyone. He was loud and swearing. I went up to him and said, ‘There are ladies here, they shouldn’t have to put up with language like that.’ He took a swing at me and missed. I knocked him down four times before he stayed down.

“The owner called me over. I thought I was in big trouble then. He said, ‘I saw what you did. That guy has been causing us trouble all evening. We’ve got a V.I.P. area inside and I’d like you to be my guest. Just stick your hand up when you want a drink. It’s all on the house.’ ”

Shakes said, “We should have gone to that club we were invited to by the guy from the Jazz’n Blues Festival.”

“Yeah,” agreed Andre, “the vodka got in the way. A guy named Rob, a friend of mine who just got out of jail, swiped two bottles of vodka from the liquor store. That’s funny, Rob robbed the liquor store. Anyway, we started on the vodka. I had a couple of seven point one per cent beers, then Rob brought out a bottle of Captain Morgan. I don’t know how I rode my bike back that night.”

Shakes said, “I don’t know how I walked to my daughter’s house that night.”

Andre said, “It reminds me of a time a buddy and I were driving past a beer store in his pickup. There was a semi backed up to the loading dock, but the store was closed. I guess the driver arrived too late to unload. There was just enough room for me to squeeze between the truck and the dock. I jimmied the lock and couldn’t believe my eyes – wall to wall beer. We filled the pickup with all it could hold. I think we had twenty-seven two-fours. We were tempted to unload and go back again, but you never return to the scene of the crime. We sure had a party though.”

Shakes said, “If you get greedy, that’s when you get pinched.”

…

Sample my books for free — To date $1945.00 has been donated to the homeless:
Gotta Find a Home: Conversations with Street People
http://buff.ly/1SGzGCY ($.99 Download)
http://buff.ly/1qLHptc ($.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2lUfp6Q ($.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2Gkoyxj ($.99 Download)
Podcasts:http://buff.ly/1Pxlf9p
http://www.blunttalk.libsyn.com/
http://buff.ly/1XU368M
http://buff.ly/2iYvOE4
http://buff.ly/2jdjZd6

Cops Go Easy – 23 July 2012

.

.

Cops Go Easy 

23 July 2012

“Silver’s back, ” said Joy. “I asked him where he’d been. He said, ‘I was just tired of Weasel’s bullshit.’ I said to him, ‘Weasel said that you’d stolen two beer from him and were hiding.’ Silver said, ‘That’s a story I haven’t heard before.’ I said to him, ‘Why don’t you just punch him. You’re bigger than him and probably stronger.’ He said, ‘I know, I just don’t want to cause trouble.’ I said, ‘I know, you’re not a fighter. Anytime you want me to fight him, just let me know.’ He said, ‘You’d do that for me?’ ‘Sure,’ I said.

“I guess Andre laid into Weasel and Little Jake on the weekend. Weasel called Andre a goof and Jake backed him. Andre gave them both a back-hand. Weasel said it again, so Andre punched him on his already swollen cheek and broke a couple of his ribs.

Andre stopped by and said, “I’m so pissed off with Hippo. We were supposed to meet an hour ago. He’s just showing up now and he’s wasting time chatting with Silver. I checked Yonge Street and both of our spots are taken. I know the guys that are there, it’s not their fault, they were there first. I haven’t made a cent this morning and it doesn’t look like I’m going to.”

Joy said, “Silver doesn’t like people hanging around when he’s working. You guys are helping Hippo, he’s lost on his own. He’s like a little kid.”

“When he’s panning,” said Andre, “he just sits there with his cap out. He doesn’t smile, or greet people. If you give him shit, he just gets that pouty look on his face.”

Joy said, “He only comes around when he needs something. When he gets money of his own, he’s nowhere to be found.”

Andre left on his bicycle, what he calls his ‘granny-cycle’. I’ve never asked how or where he acquired it. I expect he just found it somewhere.

Joy said, “Chester is going to be away for two weeks visiting his family. I hope he leaves me a key. I have the apartment key and the garbage room key, but I don’t have the electronic key to get in the building. He said that I could come with him, but everyone in his family would be speaking French, and watching French television, the same as Chester does here. I know that he doesn’t want me to have anyone stay over, but I don’t do that now, so why would I do it while he was away. I’ll just have to wait and see what he’s going to do. I may have to find a place to stay for a couple of weeks. This afternoon I meet with the housing worker from the Salvation Army. I told them I want an apartment downtown or in Regent Park, but not a crack house.”

…

As I approached the park at noon, I was pleasantly surprised to see that our benches and garbage container had been returned, freshly painted and varnished. Silver had watched the reinstallation and said to the workmen, ‘While you’re at it, would you mind leaving a case of beer as well.’ They said, ‘We can’t go that far.’

I asked Silver, “Do you have any plans to move from your place?”

“Nothing definite,” he said. “It wouldn’t be anytime soon, not in winter either. I’d want a place that had no needle pushers, no pill poppers, no one using crack or rock. The problem is, you don’t see it during the day, but at night, they run up the stairs, down the stairs, up the stairs. It never stops.”

A man with white hair, white moustache and goatee came across the street. The guys all knew him, He said to me, “My name is Brian Cherry, sometimes they call me Grapes. I was at the bank all morning. I even had the manager called down. I was having trouble with Bell Canada dipping into my account, so I put a stop payment on them. Now, I have a new account, but they haven’t closed the old one. I’ve got half a mind to put a pound of C4 under that bank and see what happens.”

Andre said, “You really want to get the job done. With that much C4 you’d take out half the block. I’ve worked with that stuff and with C5, gunpowder and dynamite.

“Out west I used to make my own homemade pipe bombs for removing stumps. We’d drive pipes down under the stump from four sides, pack them with gunpowder, lite the fuse and run like hell. You’d never believe the size of hole it made. There was a half hour wait time if it didn’t go off.”

Brian asked Andre, “Where are you staying now?”

“Second dumpster down, in back of Starbucks. There’s me, Hippo, Little Jake, Weasel and his dog Bear. All our valuables we store at the far end beside Bear. Last night I was asleep, but I sensed something, so I opened my eyes. This dude was looking around, but as soon as he saw that I was awake, and there were four of us and a dog, he backed off. I watched under the dumpster to see where his feet were going before I settled back to sleep again.

Andre was watching a crane operator across the street lift some concrete panels to the top of one of the buildings. “What a sloppy job that guy’s doing. Look at the angle on that load. I used to do that at a steel plant. I’d lift it, weigh it on the scale, then lift it into place. I was working one of those trombone cranes. That was a good job. I was getting twenty bucks an hour. My buddy, who I’d been getting a ride to work with, punched the boss in the face. I was working in Fergus, but was living thirty miles away in Orangeville. The next day I tried hitch hiking to work. It was the middle of winter and I nearly froze. I had to phone the boss and tell him I had no way get to work. He’d probably hire me again. He said that I learned in three weeks, what the former guy had taken three months to learn. He wanted me to work for him.

The cops have never bothered me panning of Yonge Street. I’m always honest with them. I said to one of them, ‘I’m just trying to get three dollars for a hamburger, then I’ll be out of here.’ He said. ‘Okay, but don’t stay too long.’ ”

Silver said, “Joy’s never been bothered either, but one day, after she had left I panned in her spot. It wasn’t long before the library security guard came out and said I had to move. Even on my birthday, Jacques had given me a huge bottle of his homemade wine, and it’s good. I hadn’t drunk more than about three fingers when this female cop came by on her bicycle. She said, ‘Silver, you’re going to have to dump that.’ I said, ‘It’s my birthday.’ She said, ‘In that case I won’t charge you, but you’ll still have to dump it.’

“Another time, the same lady cop came by just as I cracked a beer. She told me to dump it, then asked, ‘Do you have any more in your pack?’ I said, ‘Yes — I wasn’t going to lie to her. She could have searched it anyway.’ She said, ‘I’ll let you keep them as long as you don’t open them here.’ ”

.

Poster Boy

20 July 2012

“Hi Joy,” I said, “Did anything exciting happen after I left yesterday?”

“Yeah, there were cops all over. You saw the one who pulled up as you were walking down the sidewalk. I was standing at the curb and he said, ‘Am I too late for the party?’

“I said, ‘Yeah, and I’m not even drinking.’  I walked to the bus shelter to catch a bus or a streetcar and on the way I met Weasel. We sat down and he pulled out a beer. I took a sip and right then a cop car pulled up. He wrote us each a ticket for $125.00. After he left we tore them up and put them in the trash barrel. The cop must have just driven around the block, because he stopped and charged us again. He said to me, ‘You have some outstanding arrest warrants from Montreal.’ ‘Yeah,’ I said, ‘I keep meaning to go back there to take care of those.’

“I saw Outcast last night. I told you that he and Debbie aren’t getting along too well. He came right out and said, ‘Joy, I love you. I’ve always had feelings for you.’ I like him too. He’s not bad looking, we’re the same age. Right now he’s looking for an apartment for us. I told him, ‘I want a room of my own.’ He said, ‘Yeah, I understand. We’ll take things slow and see what happens.’

“Then Debbie came home. She had a really sour look on her face. I guess she thought that Outcast and I had been fuckin’ around. I felt really flustered, because of what we were talking about. I told her, ‘Don’t get the wrong idea. I don’t like men. I’m more into women, myself. She hugged me and kissed me on the cheek, then kissed me again closer to my mouth, then just at the corner of my mouth. I said, ‘Whoa, I’ve already got a girlfriend, and I should be getting home to Chester.’ I nearly bolted for the door. I talked to Outcast on the phone. After I left, Debbie said to him, ‘I think Joy really likes me.’ ”

“The boys took Levi out to show him the ropes. I don’t know how that’s going to work out. He seems like a sweet kid. I gave him a joint before I left. I said, ‘This is just for you.’ ‘No, no,’ he said, ‘I’ll share it with everybody.’ I think he’s a bit naive. I hope those guys don’t roll him for his gear.”

Cathleen, ‘the religious lady’ came by. Joy said, “Was I supposed to phone you, or were you going to phone me?”

“What’s best for you?”

“It’s best if you phone me, because I only have service after six and on weekends.”

“Okay, I’ll phone you. Maybe we can get together.” Then she left.

“She’s such a beautiful person. Did I tell you about how we first met? I was sitting here, she stopped by and said, ‘Is everything alright? You look as if you’ve been hurt.’

“I said that my boyfriend had been beating me, then I just burst into tears. I still had the pneumonia then. When I started crying, I started coughing. She placed both hands on my chest and it felt like electricity going through me. After she removed her hands I could breathe better.

“Chester’s done that as well. When I was having trouble with my knee he rubbed his hands together really fast, then placed them on my knee. It felt better after that. Chester always wants to put his hands on me. I don’t like it.”

…

At noon in the park I talked briefly with David. He said, “I found my car. I lost it for two weeks. I couldn’t remember where I parked it. It was in front of the beer store on River Street, right where I left it. It’s in the market now. Last night I was too drunk to drive.”

I sat next to Wolf and Shaggy. “Finally,” said Wolf, “someone to talk to, who can talk back to me. I’ve had a run in with nearly everyone here this morning, but when I talk to you, I can see the wheels turning. It’s not just going in one ear, going out the other.

“This morning, as usual, I took Shaggy down to the river. You know where I live, near Queen and Bayview. The river is shallow, so Shag can go out twenty feet, lay down, and the water is still just up to her neck. There are rocks there that are just the right height for me to sit on and have my feet in the water. It works for both of us.

“Anyway, I stopped in at the beer store to buy a six pack. I tied Shag to a post outside. Andre, the beer store guy, asked me where I’d been. I pointed to Shaggy, who was still dripping water. Where do you think I’ve been? He told me a sad story. He said that someone had been walking in the river a while back, they tripped and drowned. I hadn’t heard about it, or seen it in the paper. It takes the beer store guy to tell me what’s going on in my own neighborhood. A guy would have to be falling down drunk to drown in that shallow water. I guess if he hit his head on a rock he could drown. Anyway, that’s the end of my story.

“I was playing with Shaggy this morning, roughhousing, like we always do and she bit me. She’s never done that before. She’s bitten lots of other people, but not me.”

I asked, “What books are you reading now, Wolf.”

“One of those Ken Follett books. I have a friend who gives them to me every once in a while. I like it because it has large print. It’s easier on the eyes. I’ve been thinking of getting some reading glasses, the kind they sell in the drug store. Do you think they’re any good?”

“Yeah, I’ve used them. They worked fine for me. Do you go to the library? They have a whole section of large print books?”

“No, I owe them money. I lost some books, so I owe them $32.00. I checked with them five years ago, they still had it on their records. I don’t think they forget about things like that.

“How do you like my new shoes? Well, they’re new to me. A friend gave them to me. He gives me lots of stuff, he works at the Sally Ann. Anyway, I’m walking down Yonge Street and this kid says to me, ‘Hey, Mister, you’re wearing skateboarding shoes and shorts. Are you a skateboarder?’ I can barely walk and he thinks I’m a skateboarder. I thought it was odd that the shoes had so much padding. That’s the reason.”

A man and woman stopped by and introduced themselves as Noel and Jennifer, Salvation Army Housing Outreach Workers. Wolf said, “I got my apartment through you guys. I was a poster boy. They photographed me and Shaggy on the balcony of my apartment. It’s right over the front entrance.”

“What’s your name?” asked Joel.

Wolf thought for a moment whether or not to give his real name, finally he did. Noel said, “My boss, Gavin, has been trying to contact you. It’s a matter concerning your rent. I guess that’s a sensitive subject.”

“I haven’t seen Gavin for a long time.”

“He’s in management now, so he doesn’t get out much.”

“Yeah, I’ll stop in and see him.”

I said, “He probably wants to tell you that your rent has been reduced.”

“No,” said Noel, “I don’t think that’s the case.

After they left Wolf said to me, “When I first moved in there my rent was six hundred and fifty a month. After a year they increased it by eight dollars. I know they’re allowed to raise the rent, but I refused to pay the increase. I kept sending them checks for six fifty. They called me to a tribunal. As soon as I got there I said, ‘What’s the idea of raising the rent on that bug infested, crack house!’ The lawyer said that they should drop the matter, so they did.

“The next year they sent me a notice saying the rent was going to be raised by eight dollars a month. I sent the checks for the original six fifty. It’s three years now that I haven’t been paying any increase, so that’s eight, plus eight, plus eight. I don’t know how much that works out to, but it’s a lot of money. Long story short, that’s why Gavin wants to see me.”

As I was leaving, Hippo called me aside. “I hate to ask you,” he said, “But do you have any more of those Tim Horton cards? I haven’t eaten all day.”

“Sorry, Hippo, I’ve run out, but I’ll be sure to bring you one on Monday.”

…

Sample my books for free — To date $1945.00 has been donated to the homeless:
Gotta Find a Home: Conversations with Street People
http://buff.ly/1SGzGCY ($.99 Download)
http://buff.ly/1qLHptc ($.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2lUfp6Q ($.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2Gkoyxj ($.99 Download)
Podcasts:http://buff.ly/1Pxlf9p
http://www.blunttalk.libsyn.com/
http://buff.ly/1XU368M
http://buff.ly/2iYvOE4
http://buff.ly/2jdjZd6

Gene Goes to Prison – 19 July 2012

Gene Goes to Prison

19 July 2012

This morning was cool and breezy. Joy was wearing a hoodie, with her hands in the pocket, and hood pulled over her head.

“You’re looking good, Joy,” I said.

“Thanks, it was too hot to drink yesterday. I didn’t sleep much. The people downstairs were out on their balcony, talking loud. They were also smoking pot.”

“Are they the neighbors directly below you?”

“Yes.”

“You could always spill something on them.”

“I thought of that. Chester’s also being a real pain, especially when he’s drunk. I was doing the laundry yesterday, he came in and said, ‘I’m hungry. Will you make me something to eat?’ I said, ‘Dude, you know where the fridge is, make something yourself.’ I’m not his housekeeper.

“Outcast was over last night. He brought twelve beer and gave Chester six. After a while Chester came to me and said, ‘I want him out of here, and he’s not sleeping over.’ ‘Look dude,’ I said, ‘If you want him out, you tell him, and tell him why.’

“Later on he said to me, ‘Joy, will you sleep with me? I won’t do anything. I just want to be close to you.’ ‘Chester,’ I said, ‘we’ve been over this before. I’m not sleeping with you. It’s not going to happen, not now, not ever.’ Guys always try that. They say they just want to sleep next to you, then they start touching you. I hate that.”

“You can see why Anne left him,” I said.

“I sure can, but he still goes on about her, ‘I miss my Annie,’ he says. She’s never going to take him back.”

“There’s nothing worse than jealousy, to spoil a relationship,” I said.

“That’s for sure. Outcast isn’t getting along with Debbie. She wants to up his rent because her daughter is pregnant again. Why that should affect his rent, I don’t know. I told him that, if things with Chester get any worse, we could find a two bedroom somewhere and share it.

“I saw Little Jake this morning, he’s over at Silver’s spot. He’s got a huge bump on his forehead. Fran’s new boyfriend head butted him last night. Jake was wasted, he doesn’t know what happened, or why.”

“Fran’s new boyfriend? Isn’t she with Gene any more?”

“Gene is in prison. He jumped Fran and she has two hairline fractures in her back. The doctors are going to monitor it for a while to see what happens. She may need surgery. This new guy may be the father of one of her sons. He’s a big guy. Sounds a lot like Daimon. I can’t wait to meet him to see how tough he is.”

“How is it going with Pierre?”

“I don’t know. He sent me a text at eleven thirty last night. I just read it this morning. He says he won’t be coming by the park. I know why he hasn’t been coming to the park, it’s because he owes Outcast a hundred dollars.

“I also saw Weasel this morning.”

I said, “You know why Silver hasn’t been using his spot, don’t you?”

“Yeah, because Weasel accused him of stealing two beer from him. Weasel is a real mess. His eye and the whole side of his face is a massive bruise, with strange marks across it. He said he was boot fucked. He doesn’t remember who it was, or why. Probably some of the crack heads at the Sally Ann.”

…

Sitting on the curb near the park were Serge, Shakes, Chester, Joy, Hippo, Little Jake and Levi from Arizona – just passing through. Andre arrived on his bicycle shortly after. Hippo said, “Six up, coming up the hill.” I turned to see two bicycle patrol officers stopping.

One of the officers asked, “What are you people doing, just congregating?”

“Yes, officer,” said Shakes.

“Does anyone have any booze?”

“We can’t afford it,” said Shakes.

One of the officers got off his bike. I could read his name tag, Budmiester. He walked around the group and noticed an open can of Old Milwaukee behind Serge. He picked it up and emptied the contents on the sidewalk. “I’m going to have to charge you with this. What’s your name?”

“Serge Martin, just like Steve Martin. You can write me a ticket, but I’m not going to pay it. You might as well save the paper. I’ll just throw it out.”

“You can do as you wish, but the courts have been giving thirty-day jail sentences, depending on how many outstanding charges you have.”

Andre said, “I’m looking at your name tag, does it say Budweiser?”

Officer Curtis said, “We’ve had a complaint. You’re going to have to move somewhere else.” We all stood except Jake who said, “I’m supposed to stay here to meet my worker. I have to appear in court this afternoon.”

“On what charge?” asked officer Curtis.

“Panning. I was charged by officer Lang.”

“You’d better appear then.”

We walked to the far end of the park and sat on the grass. It was still damp from the sprinklers. Andre reached into his backpack and pulled out a bottle of sherry and threw it to Shakes who opened it and passed it around. When it got to Levi, he said, “I don’t drink, I only smoke.” Shakes reached into his pocket and pulled out a small round can. He threw it to Joy. Andre handed her a rolling paper. Soon, a joint was being passed around.

Levi asked, “What are the laws concerning marijuana in Ontario?”

Marujuana posession laws in Ontario:

Currently, it is against the Criminal Code to possess any amount of marijuana anywhere in Canada, unless you have received a medical exemption from Health Canada.

For a first conviction, if you had less than 30 grams of marijuana, the maximum penalties are a fine of $1000 or 6 months in jail, or both. But the penalty for a first offense is usually much less.

In practise, police agencies are reluctant to charge individuals for simple possession preferring to target dealers and grow-ops, and the courts would prefer not spending time prosecuting these cases. Even if one is charged, it is very easy to have the case dismissed in exchange for a charitable donation. There does however continue to be convictions in Ontario courts for simple possession.”

Joy said, “It all depends on the cop who stops you. You just saw Serge get a liquor violation ticket, while Sparky had a bottle right in front of him. Frank got a ticket for panhandling, I’ve been panhandling for fifteen years and never got a ticket.

“If a cop stops you and you’ve got five grams of weed, he’ll probably just throw it out on the ground and grind it with his heel. He may give you a warning, he may give you a ticket.”

“Dennis,” said Jake, “what time is it?”

“Twelve, forty-five.”

“Court starts at one, my worker hasn’t shown up. I’m never going to make it. It’s all the way across town, even if I took the bus I wouldn’t get there in time.”

“Sounds like a failure to appear,” said Joy.

Jake Ticketed Again – 18 July 2012

Jake Ticketed Again

18 July 2012

Noon at the park was pleasant. The weather was warm with a refreshing breeze blowing. Many of the regulars had gone to the Don River, near where Jacques lives. On the sidewalk were Jake, Loon, Hippo, Andre, and Danny.

“How do I get to the Don?” asked Loon.

“Fastest way,” said Andre, “is to take any of the long busses  on Queen and get off at Bayview. Make sure you don’t try to jump any of the short busses.”

Loon said, “What if I take the streetcar. Won’t that take me there?”

“For one, “said Andre,”The streetcars are harder to jump.  Two, it’s a two hundred and thirty-five dollar ticket if you get caught.”

Jake said to me, “I can’t panhandle any more.”

“Yeah,” I said, “You told me that yesterday.”

“No, I got charged again last night. I don’t know why they have such a hard-on for me, but I was at my usual spot and a cop car pulls up. He writes me a ticket and says, ‘This is the last time, Jake. I know that as soon as I’m gone you’re going to be panning again. I won’t be back, but the next time I catch you, you’re going to jail.’

“I asked, ‘Was anyone following him?’

‘No, not as far as I knew.’

“It wasn’t ten minutes before a cop on foot patrol came and wrote me up. He said, ‘Next time, Jake, you’re going to jail.’ It all started with Peterman, that’s what we call him. Now, I’m on probation and have two breaches against me. I’m going to start fighting back.”

“What are you going to do, Jake.”

“Spit on them!”

“Don’t do that Jake,” I said, “You’ve got AIDS, the charge will be assault with a deadly weapon. Because of Joy’s hep c, she did eighteen months for spitting near a cop. It didn’t even hit him.”

“What am I supposed to do? It’s still two weeks to check day and I’ve got no money. None of us have been doing very well, except for the Jazz’n Blues Festival. I’ve got a hearing tomorrow. That’ll just be in and out. Then I’ve got a court appearance on the twenty-ninth, I think. I’ve got it written down someplace. I’m going to fight it.”

Hippo said, “When you go to court, Jake, ask for legal aid. At the legal aid office, get an appointment with Sherry. Tell her you’re an alcoholic and that you’re living on the street. She’s an alcoholic herself.”

Andre said, “I don’t know why they bother you guys. I’m at my usual spot in front of Tim Hortons. I’ve got some regulars. One buys me a large coffee every morning. Today, I shared it with Hippo. There’s another who buys me a bagel or an English muffin. A cop came by and asked me what I was doing. I said, ‘Officer, I’m eating my breakfast.’ He said, ‘You’ve got your hat out.’ ‘Yes I do,’ I said, ‘I live on the streets. What else am I supposed to do?’ He left me alone.

“I worked at this bar in Calgary once. I was the cook, the maintenance guy, the bartender and the bouncer. When customers would come in I’d tell them, ‘We only got one rule here — don’t piss off the cook. If you piss of the cook, you won’t get anything to drink, and you’ll be thrown out.”

Danny said, ‘I have a regular who brings me heart-shaped cookies every morning. She calls them love cookies. This morning she said, “I’ve never given you money before, so take this.’ She dropped a twenty. She’s cute too.

“I found a lot of booze at the Jazz’n Blues Festival. I brought my flash light to look for empties and I came across a bag behind a curb. In it was half a twenty-six of V.S.O.P cognac. It wasn’t Remy Martin, or anything special, but it sure was good. I almost threw the bag out when I noticed this can of weed. I also found sixteen full beer cans that people had stashed in the bushes and the hedge.”

Andre said, “Shakes and I didn’t make it through the gate until the last night. It’s a bit harder when you’re riding a bicycle. You can’t just jump the fence. Anyway, we were coming by one of the back trails and I saw an empty bottle of vodka. Nearby was a water bottle, but it had something orange in it. I thought to myself, That’s odd, what do people usually mix with vodka?. I put two and two together and took a sip. It was powerful.”

Jake said, “People think I’m lucky because I get to sit in the sun and get a good tan. The only reason I do is because I have to sit for hours, in the sun, waiting to get my price.”

Andre said, “I’ve still got a full bag of food left over from last night. I’ve got a slice of pizza, some steamed rice and half a sub.”

“I’m getting hungry,” said Hippo. I’m going to have to make another trip to Freshco. Yesterday, I got seventeen bucks worth of food and only paid a dollar for a bag of chips. That canned ham I brought over last night — that’s where I got it.”

“There’s the Farmer’s Market south of Dundas between Sumach and Sackville Streets.” said Danny.

Jake said, “I don’t have any batteries for my radio. I’m going to have to steal four double A’s.”

“You really are in a hurry to go back to prison,” said Andre.

.

Serge Beaten Again

17 July 2012

This morning there was a brief shower. Joy was partially protected by the overhang of a building, just her feet were getting wet. I held my umbrella over her. She said, “Don’t worry about the umbrella. I don’t mind getting wet. It’s better than the heat. When it’s hot I have trouble sleeping. I’m on a fold out couch in Chester’s living room. Sometimes, I take the mattress off and put it next to the open balcony door. If Chester wants to watch TV late at night, I put the mattress back.

“I don’t know why he doesn’t get air conditioning. It would only cost an extra twenty-five dollars a month. I told him, ‘We can afford it.’ He said, ‘No, no, it’s too much money.’

“I’ve noticed a lot of fat people lately. I was fat for most of my life. Kids especially, but adults as well, can be really cruel.”

“What caused you to lose the weight so quickly?”

“I was gutted (with a saw-toothed machete). They put a cage to hold the parts of my stomach together. They also made it smaller. For a long time all I was allowed to eat was baby food. I tried eating scrambled eggs, but I threw up so violently that I pulled out some of the staples, so back to the hospital. I still have to be careful about what I eat. I hate any pureed food.”

I said, “I had a long talk with Gaston yesterday. He seems very intelligent.”

“Yeah, he’s a nice guy. We live right across the street from him. I’m not sure if he has full-blown AIDS or not. He’s opened an HIV drop-in centre, even some in other cities.”

How are you and Pierre getting along?”

“I don’t know. He’s such a drama queen. One day he just wants to be friends. The next day he gets all hissy if I don’t text him. He said, ‘I’m going away for a few days, so you’d better collect your pot.’ Well, it’s been a few days and he’s still here.”

Hippo stopped by. “We got soaked last night. The puddles were about two inches deep. There was me, Andre, Little Jake, Weasel and Bear. At noon we’re going to some church. They put on a free meal. We can get free haircuts and other stuff. After that I guess I’ll just go back to the hole.”

The garbage man stopped by. “Hi, handsome,” said Joy. “I don’t know how you can do that job, with all the smell. What does your girlfriend say when you get home?”

“Right now, I’m just working with cardboard and paper. That’s not too bad. I tried the regular route. I was lifting a garbage can over my head and some of the liquid waste spilled on my face. It was awful. I quit right away. I can’t even work with the recycled bottles and cans. The leftover liquid goes bad and smells like rotten fruit.”

“Bye, handsome.

“I took another look at old Serge’s eyes. There’s no way that he got those bruises falling off a bench.”

I said, “He told me that he tripped over his shoelace.”

“There you go — he’s lying. I said to him, ‘Serge, I’ve been beaten enough times that I can tell the difference between a bruise caused by a fist and one caused by a fall. You were beaten, weren’t you?” He said, ‘I don’t want to cause any trouble, or have anyone come after me.’ “
…

I was walking along Queen and I heard someone shout, “Hey!” I looked around and saw old Serge sitting on a park bench in the shade.

“Hi, Serge,” I said. “I didn’t see you there. Your eyes are looking better. How do you feel?”

“I’m just waiting to get my booze.”

“How was your weekend?”

“I forget.”

“Take care, Serge. I’ll see you on my way back.”

At the park were Hippo, Little Jake, Shakes, Wolf and his dog Shaggy.

Shakes said, “Andre’s just gone on a run.”

I asked Hippo, “Did you go to the church to get your haircut?”

“No, we didn’t make it there, maybe next year.”

Andre rode up on the lawn on his bicycle and handed Shakes a brown paper bag. Shakes took out the bottle of sherry, unscrewed the cap, filled the cap with sherry and threw it on the lawn. Then, he passed the bottle around. When it got back to him he poured the remainder into a plastic drinking bottle. He threw the empty bottle to Wolf, who put it in Shaggy’s cart.

Andre asked Wolf, “So that’s forty cents you got?”

“No, I only get twenty cents a bottle.”

“Yeah, but you got one earlier.”

“I know I got one earlier. That was twenty cents too. I didn’t know you were asking how many twenty centses I had. I’ve also got a bunch of beer cans.”

Shakes asked Wolf, “Can I buy a smoke off you?”

Wolf said, “Now, where on my way home am I going to find a place to buy more smokes? Yes, Shakes I’ll sell you a smoke. Here’s two, just give me a quarter.”

Hippo was smoking.  Jake asked him, “Can I have a drag?”

“Sure,” said Hippo, “lay back and I’ll drag you around the park. What did we eat last night?”

Andre said, “We had double cheeseburgers and fries.”

Hippo said, “I was wondering what I pooped this morning.”

I said to Andre, “I heard you guys really got soaked last night.”

“Yeah, Hippo was the first to wake up. He was just standing over his bag saying, ‘Oh fuck, oh fuck!’ He didn’t bother to wake us up or anything he just kept looking at his bag.”

Jake said, “I thought it wouldn’t last more than a few minutes. I just pulled my sleeping bag over my head and planned to wait it out. Almost immediately, I was soaked. We went over to where Weasel was sleeping, at least it was partially covered.

“I can’t wait to find out if my housing is approved. I was shown a place this morning. It was fabulous. It’s on the second floor. All the way up the stairs are Leafs posters. I was wearing my Leaf shirt.”

I asked, “When will you find out if you get it or not?”

“It depends on my worker. There are other people interested in that place. I don’t know how they come to a decision.”

“Your worker seems really nice,” I said.

“She’s super!”

Shakes said, “I was talking to Lucy-in-the-Sky today. She said, ‘Shakes, I tried drinking and smoking while laying down like you do, but I would either spill my drink or drop my smoke. I don’t know how you manage it.”

Andre said, “I fell asleep with a smoke in my hand last night. I always keep my hands crossed on my chest, that way if I fall asleep I’m the one that gets burned. You can see the mark right here.”

.

Conversations with God

buff.ly/2xHgS3p

16 July 2012

This morning I walked past the library. Inside, I saw a man sitting on a bench, a backpack was at his side. His hair was long and stringy, he looked half asleep. I wondered whether or not I should approach him. I didn’t know what his reaction would be. I decided to take a chance. “Hi, would you like some breakfast?”

He was drinking from a dark plastic bottle. He didn’t acknowledge me, or stop drinking. “If you want breakfast, there’s a Tim Horton’s on the next corner.”

I held out a $ 5.00 Tim Horton’s card. “I’m just offering, no obligation.”

“No, thanks.”

“Have a good day.”

…

At the park this afternoon, Gaston said, “I was talking to one my private clients. We have been working with her a long time doing odd jobs, anything she needs help with. She has houses in Arizona and California. We’ve been invited to come down with her and manage one of her houses. All of our expenses will be covered. She’ll even arrange for Molly Maid to come in, while we’re away, to handle our existing clients who need their houses cleaned.”

Larry and I discovered that we were both born and raised in Saskatoon. “I lived there for seventeen years,” he said. ” After that we moved nearby to Osler and Warman. I wasn’t with my real mother and father, but lived with a white, foster family. I always felt bad that other kids had parents but I didn’t, but that’s the way it was. I stayed with that family until I saw the guy hitting his wife. Then I moved out. I went to Winnipeg where I grew up quick.” He lifted up his tee-shirt and pointed to his ribs, “This scar is where I was stabbed — a souvenir of Winnipeg. Then I went to prison.

“I had a wife, we split up, but we have a son. Whenever I’m straight and sober, I visit him. He’s seventeen now and he loves me. I’ve never had anyone love me before. We’re neighbors. My ex wife’s boyfriend doesn’t like me to come around. He probably thinks that we’re having sex together.

“I’m educated, I used to be a very religious person, went to church every sunday. Man, I really jumped in with both feet. Then I had an epiphany. It was a dream or a vision where I saw two books on a table, one white , one black. I kept trying to reaching for the black one –the bible is usually black — but I was guided to the white one. Shortly after, I came across the book ‘Conversations with God’ by Neale Donald Walsch  It’s a book where the author asks questions of God and God answers. It opened my eyes. Previously, I felt guilty all the time. Now, I feel free. I can create my own destiny.”

Larry is affected by a pigment disorder (non-segmental vitiligo) above his upper lip. He let his moustache grow, one side came in white, the other black. He had been teased about it, so he shaved it off. “Now I remember why I stopped shaving,” he said. “I must have cut myself three times. That’s what happens when you use those cheap disposable razors they give you at the Mission. I think they get them at a discount because the blades have nicks in them. I remember using one of those to shave, and I don’t mean my legs, It made a bloody mess. If I buy one of those five blade razors it will last me three months.”

Loretta said, “Do you see the self-mutilation job I did to myself? Her legs were covered with bruises. “I’ve got other bruises on my ribs. Larry and I and some others were going to Bluesfest, but we had some booze to drink first. We walked across the black bridge. I’m afraid of bridges anyway. We were on our way back, nearly across the bridge, when I lost my balance and fell over the edge. I landed in the river on some really sharp rocks. I could have killed myself. Larry helped me to get out of the water.”

“How many lives is that you’ve used up?” asked Larry.

“Two, I have seven left.”

~~~

Sample my books for free — To date, $1945.00 has been donated to the homeless:

Gotta Find a Home: Conversations with Street People
http://buff.ly/1SGzGCY ($2.99 Download)
http://buff.ly/1qLHptc ($2.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2lUfp6Q ($2.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2Gkoyxj ($2.99 Download)

They Call Me Red:
https://buff.ly/2GJSDsG ($2.99 Download)

Private Eye: Eugene Leftowicz
https://buff.ly/3kP2pMZ ($2.99 Download)

Podcasts:
http://buff.ly/1Pxlf9p Sara Troy:  Self-Discovery Media
http://buff.ly/1XU368M Sara Troy:  Positive Vibrations Roundtable
http://buff.ly/2jdjZd6 Patricia Saunders: Writetimes Literacy Project

Post navigation

‘Shrooms

buff.ly/2xHgS3p

 
 

16 July 2012

As I approached Joy this morning, Christine, ‘the religious lady’, was squatting beside her, programming Joy’s telephone. “There,” she said, “now you have my phone number and I have yours.”

“Thanks, I’m so bad at keeping track of phone numbers.” They both promised to keep in contact. Christine left shortly after.

“This phone is useless,” said Joy. “As soon as my billing period is over, I’m getting a different phone that plays music as well. I need my music.”

I asked, “How has it been living with Chester?”

“He’s a sweetheart, except when he’s drunk. He’d keep asking me, ‘Is everything alright, Joy?’ over and over again. He even yells up the stairs at me. Then he’ll start crying, ‘I miss Anne, I miss Ipeelee.’ Now he’s met a woman who speaks French and drinks like he does. I’m so relieved.

“Yesterday I barbecued some ribs with a sweet and sour sauce. We also had boiled potatoes. Chester wanted them mashed, but I told him, ‘If you want them smashed, you smash them with your fork.’ When I was getting the ribs ready — I boiled them first, then put them in marinade — Chester came down. Since I was already in the kitchen, I asked him if he wanted me to fix him something to eat. ‘Sure,’ he said, ‘I’d like a fried egg, bacon and toast.’ I had in mind to make him a sandwich.

“We don’t have air conditioning. You’d think that, in a building for seniors, they’d have air conditioning. I have a door to the balcony, but it only has a screen at the top. I leave the door wide open to catch any breeze. The only problem is the mosquitoes. As long as I can get to sleep before they start biting, they can feast to their heart’s content. You can see I have a few bites on my legs.

“Chester asked me, “Why don’t we have Jacques over?’ I said, ‘Because he has bed bugs. He sleeps on his kitchen floor because that’s the only place there is no carpet. Bed bugs love carpet. I’m sure they can walk from the carpet to go over and bite him. They must be in his bed as well. They can hide in a pant cuff and lay dormant for eighteen months, then they drop a bunch of eggs. Soon, you’ve got ten thousand of them.”

I asked, “Isn’t there any way of getting rid of them.. Aren’t there sprays, or something?”

“There are sprays. You have to use them over and over, and the bugs can be anywhere. You never kill them all. Orkin sells a mattress cover that they can’t chew through, but that means that any that are in the mattress are going to be crawling around under the cover. That gives me the creeps.

“The best way to get rid of them is to rip out all the carpets and throw out the mattresses.”

“How about foam mattresses?”

“They can get into everything. Some people think they are safe if they use goose down pillows, but they get into them as well.”

I said, “I haven’t seen Silver for a while.”

“I’ve heard,” said Joy, “that he’s been panning down near the Mission. That’s crazy! The spot he has here is a gold mine and he’s been here over ten years. I think he’s smoking crack again. People have seen him sitting with the crack heads down at the Mission.”

“I said, “It must be hard to get off that stuff, once you’ve started.”

“I was fine when I was just dealing it, but when I started to smoke it I was hooked. What got me off it was my mother threatening that, unless I quit, I’d never see my kids again. I quit right away, no programs or anything. I used to be a lot heavier. When I quit the crack I also stopped eating so much. When my mother saw me losing weight she thought I was back on drugs. I just didn’t want to be fat anymore.

“Wolf and Weasel are both crack heads. I don’t know why Wolf puts up with the abuse that Weasel gives him. Wolf always gives him a place to stay. He even has a sign on his door that says, ‘gone fishing’, which is the same as saying, ‘fuck off’, but Weasel will just keep hammering on the door. One time he kicked it in.”

I said, “That was the night that Wolf and Shaggy slept at ‘the heater’. Wolf said he was so glad to see Andre and Hippo, just for protection.”

“Shaggy would never let anything happen to Wolf. I was over at his place with Outcast. It was an absolute mess. Wolf said, ‘Don’t lecture me, Joy. I know it’s a mess. I’ll get around to cleaning it.’ ”

“I saw a lot of crack heads further down on Queen Street, where my son lives.”

“There are a lot in Regent Park as well. I remember one time I was running from the cops. In my building they used to have crash doors. I didn’t know they had changed them. Anyway, I was running down the hall, lickety split, hit the door and knocked myself out. I woke up at the cop shop. I said to them, ‘Okay, you caught me, write me up and I’ll get out of here.’ They let me go and I went right back to doing what I was doing before.

“I went to The Womens Center to see about my identification. They said, ‘We’re sorry, Joy. We’ve run into a bit of a snag, but we should have your papers shortly.’ It’s as if I don’t exist, but I get my G.S.T. (Goods and Services Tax) check. See here it is. Joy K. Sturgess.”

“What does the K. stand for?”

“Kathleen, well actually, Kathlee. My mom ran out of room on the birth registration form. I thought that Kathlee was kind of neat, it was original, but people kept adding the ‘n’ anyway.”

…

 

Ian the Mooch

buff.ly/2xHgS3p

 

13 July 2012

The sprinklers were on at the park today, so the group was sitting on the curb. Shakes was asleep. Andre rode in on his bicycle. Sat between Anastasia and Andre.

“Today is so hot and humid,” said Anastasia. “Can’t wait until Buck arrives, then I’m going to meet some of the others at the Don River, near Jacques’ place. It’s always cooler there. I love being by the water. Mother has a cottage on Georgian Bay. Going there this summer, but I can’t afford it right now. I have to wait until my check arrives, on August first. It doesn’t have running water or electricity. Love to relax in nature. I also paint mostly landscape scenes and rocks. Paint in oils, I love spontaneity. My daughter — she’s thirty — just got engaged. They’ve bought a house in Brantford. It’s going to be a bit more difficult for me to visit her.

“Here comes Buck and Dillinger. I’ll be off now.”

Andre said, “I had a good time last night. Riding my bicycle and saw a woman asleep on a bench. I thought to myself, ‘I know that ass.‘  I peeked under her cap and recognized Betty. We were making out on the bench until about midnight. She handed me her apartment keys and said, ‘I’ve got things to finish, but go to my place, have something to eat, have a shower. I’ll be there shortly.’

“Fried a pork chop, some potatoes. We had a great meal, but what I really loved was the shower. It had a lot of pressure. Washed my hair twice. The first time the lather was black. When Betty came in, she opened the fridge and plunked a bottle of wine in front of me. We had a fun time.”

Hippo said to Buck, “How much do I owe you from yesterday?”

Buck checked on his smartphone and said, “Eight bucks.”

“I thought it was seven.”

“No, eight.”

“Well, there’s no arguing with a computer. Can you add another ten on that?”

“Sure.”

Jake said, “I wondered where everyone was last night. I’m not used to sleeping alone.

“I worry about panhandling now that I have two charges against me. Got one coming up on the twentieth and one on August fifth. I get sentenced on September fifteenth. I’m sure I’m going to get jail time.

“Trying to decide what I’ll have to eat. I think I’ll go to Dollarama and steal some smoked oysters and crackers. Pay for a bag of chips.

“Owe Buck fifty-six, but other people owe me fifty. If they’d pay me, I could pay him off. I didn’t see Ian last night. He owes me ten, Hippo owes me ten, Wolf owes me ten and this guy owes me twenty. SHAKES, YOU OWE ME TWENTY BUCKS.” Shakes slept on. “And I haven’t even had a drink yet!”

“That got his attention,” said Andre. “He made eighty at the Burlington Jazz’n Blues Festival last night. He drank most of it already.”

“Hippo, throw me that bottle,” said Jake.

Hippo threw a half-full, plastic wine bottle to Jake, but it hit his radio. The radio, playing a little more than static, got worse. Danny fiddled with the dials to try to get better reception. Nothing he did made much improvement.

Jake said, “There’s a difference between a bum and a mooch. I’ll bum smokes off people, but I pay them back. Sometimes I’ve even paid a debt twice. When I ask someone how much I owe them the nicest thing to hear is, ‘It’s okay, Jake, you’ve already paid me. Hope Shakes doesn’t think that by giving me a drink, every now and then, it’s going to erase the twenty bucks he owes me.”

“No way, man,” said Andre. “If you borrow cash, you repay in cash. If you get someone drunk, they’re expected to do the same for you, in return.”

Jake said, “Every time Ian comes around, he’s mooching cigarettes, money, or booze… mooch, mooch, mooch. He never comes around when he has money of his own. We’re going to have to put him straight on that.”

Danny said, “I saw Shakes at the Blues Festival last night. The police were harassing him. There was a couple, sharing a drink, on one side of the road. The cops ignored them, but they crossed the road and ordered Shakes to dump his bottle. It should be the same law for everyone.”

.

…

Sample my books for free — To date, $1945.00 has been donated to the homeless

Gotta Find a Home: Conversations with Street People
http://buff.ly/1SGzGCY ($2.99 Download)
http://buff.ly/1qLHptc ($2.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2lUfp6Q ($2.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2Gkoyxj ($2.99 Download)

They Call Me Red:
https://buff.ly/2GJSDsG ($2.99 Download)

Private Eye: Eugene Leftowicz
https://buff.ly/3kP2pMZ ($2.99 Download)

Podcasts:
http://buff.ly/1Pxlf9p Sara Troy:  Self-Discovery Media
http://buff.ly/1XU368M Sara Troy:  Positive Vibrations Roundtable
http://buff.ly/2jdjZd6 Patricia Saunders: Writetimes Literacy Project

Bear Gets a Ticket

buff.ly/2xHgS3p

 

12 July 2012

As I got off the bus this morning I was greeted by Metro, “Good Morning, Dennis, Joy’s here today.”

“Thanks, Metro. Have a good day.”

Next, I was greeted by Two-four, “Good morning, Dennis. Joy’s here today.”

“Thanks, Two-four. Have a good day.”

I could just barely see Joy’s cap and her two feet sticking out behind the concrete partition. “Hi, Joy.”

“Hi, Sunshine, how are you today?”

“I’m great. How do you like staying at Chester’s place?”

“Like it. He’s quiet, not like Chuck. Have the house all cleaned and it’ll stay cleaned. There’s no dog tracking in mud all the time. The fridge is full of food. We had bacon and eggs this morning. Have all my laundry done. The only thing I’m waiting for is my GST (Goods and Services Tax) check from the government. I don’t think Chuck would hold that back on me. He says he hasn’t received his yet, either.”

Said, “I haven’t seen Silver or Hippo lately? Heard that Silver is panning near the Mission.”

“That’s strange,” said Joy, “I can see Silver going to the Mission for meals, but he’s had his spot for over ten years. He has regulars that come by. One that drops him a twenty. Can’t see him sticking his nose up at that, to pan near the Mission. As far as Hippo is concerned, I think he’s visiting his folks in Oshawa.

“Another couple of people I don’t expect to see are Daimon and Lucy. He wouldn’t dare come down on crutches. He’d be too vulnerable, and he’s made a lot of enemies. I think he’s going to be lying low for quite a while.”

“Have an appointment to see my probation officer today. On the card she gave me, the date reads Thursday, July eleventh. The eleventh was yesterday. I just noticed it this morning. There shouldn’t be any problem. I’ll tell her I was going by the day of the week, not the date.”

…

At the park, this noon was Shakes (asleep), Lucy (asleep), Little Jake (barely awake), Andre, Hippo, Ian, Danny, Joy, Chester, Wolf, and his dog Shaggy. Asked Hippo, “You look all cleaned up, you’ve shaved. Have you been home visiting your folks?”

“No, for the last week, I’ve been staying at the West End Hotel (the West End Detention Center).”

“Hippo, did they remove your stitches while you were there?” asked Andre.

“Yeah, the nurse took them out.”

Shaggy was contentedly eating dog treats and licking Joy’s toes. “I’m not sure I like her that close,” said Joy, “Last time she bit my ankle, and she drew blood.”

Danny said, “One time, when I had my work boots on, Shaggy bit my boot. Her teeth went through a quarter of an inch of leather and left a mark on my foot.”

“Did you hear that Bear got a ticket?” said Wolf. “Can you imagine giving a ticket to a dog?”

“Can imagine it,” said Andre, “She’s going to defend herself, your honor.”

“Why would they give her a ticket?” I asked.

“Maybe because of the holes that have been dug in the lawn,’ said Wolf. The cop asked me if it was Shaggy that dug them. Said, ‘No, it was the black one, not the white one.’

Andre said, “You should have seen the breakfast I had this morning. It was all the stuff I got while I was panning last night. Had calamari, octopus, all kinds of seafood, nachos, and fajitas. At The Greasy Oven, the owner pumped up the tires on my bicycle. Holding the bike, my hat was on the ground. Some women came by and asked me, ‘Do you think the man who was here would mind if we left him some food?’ I said, ‘No, ma’am, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind. He would appreciate it. I’ll guard it until he comes back.’”

Joy said, “I walked by you guys around six this morning, Ian was asleep, and his pecker was out of his pants, just blowing in the wind. What a revolting sight, first thing in the morning.”

Ian said, “I must have gotten up in the night to pee and forgot to zip up. I was really wasted.

“My people (the people of the Heiltsuk Nation) have had an offer of a billion dollars if they allow an Alaskan pipeline company to go under our waters. We’re on an island off the west coast. We have over a million miles of water rights. We turned down their offer. Can you imagine what would happen if there was an oil leak? It would wreck the fishing industry, kill the ducks and waterfowl. We’d have nothing to live on at all.”

Andre said, “I was drinking with this guy last night. We were sharing my bottle. After it was finished, he brought out a bottle of his own. I said, ‘Now you bring out your bottle? You can be sure that we’re going to stay up until this is finished. If you fall asleep, I’ll finish it myself.’”

Joy was having trouble with her phone. “This is useless.” she said, “I’ve got the phone plan that Jacques recommended. For one thing, I only have free calling after six at night and on weekends. I never phone anyone on the weekend unless it’s seeing if any of you guys are down here. If you’re not, I don’t come. The rest of the time I have to text. I don’t know how to make spaces, so everything comes out as one garbled line. I just got a text back from Glen. He says, ‘Who the fuck is this?’ I answered, ‘Joy.’ he understood that.”

A woman walked toward the group and spoke to Jake. He put on his backpack and walked away with her.

“Who was that?” asked Danny.

“That’s his social worker.”

“You mean, a social worker will come looking for her client?”

“Not many will, but she does.”

~~~

Sample my books for free — To date, $1945.00 has been donated to the homeless:

Gotta Find a Home: Conversations with Street People
http://buff.ly/1SGzGCY ($2.99 Download)
http://buff.ly/1qLHptc ($2.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2lUfp6Q ($2.99 Download)
https://buff.ly/2Gkoyxj ($2.99 Download)

They Call Me Red:
https://buff.ly/2GJSDsG ($2.99 Download)

Private Eye: Eugene Leftowicz
https://buff.ly/2GJSDsG ($2.99 Download)

Podcasts:
http://buff.ly/1Pxlf9p
http://www.blunttalk.libsyn.com/
http://buff.ly/1XU368M
http://buff.ly/2iYvOE4
http://buff.ly/2jdjZd6