Jamieson Wolf's Blog, page 79

A Nebulous of Words – A Poem

I dream of you while I sleep.

In the dream, you take my hand

and hold it, letting your warmth

slip up my arm and into my heart.

Neither of us says anything

because there are no words

to describe what lies between us.

When I wake, I try to think

of some words and find them

all lacking, not quite enough,

but they will have to do.

I utter each word like a wish

and hope that they will find you,

travel to you over the sea,

and come to you in your slumber.

I sit outside, letting the sun

shine down on my face,

reminiscent of the warmth

and the fire that you awake

inside of me. I speak each word

softly as if it is a prayer or hope

given voice. As I speak each word,

shape each syllable, I watch

as it slides out of my mouth

and forms a small ball of light,

an embodiment of the joy

that you fill me with.

They travel around me

like small suns, rotating

in orbit. When I’m done

and the last words is spoken,

they rise into the air and slip

away from me, leaving trails

of light in the air. I know that

when they find you, they

will not be small suns, but

a nebulous of stars that

will shine brightly, marking

your path through the sky

and guiding you back

to me, each word a star

that you can wish upon

as you find your way

home.

Lesson’s Learned and Turning the Page…

So, learned something today. A few days ago, I asked the cards “How do I move forward if my workshop isn’t a success?” At the time I only had one student who registered. By Friday, I still only had one student.

Instead of running the workshop, I figured it would make more sense to do a series of sessions with Dava where I could act as her mentor and help her with what she needed to get her book published.

I ended up having a great time! I taught her all about using social media to promote her books and hooked her up with an editor  and began making lists on further things to work on like a web site, blog and promotional materials and the name for her publishing press.

I was a little disappointed that the workshop didn’t run, but had some chocolate and actually went back to the cards I had pulled. They were Fortune, The Fool and The Star. I had taken photos of them and hadn’t read what they had to say.

Tonight, I looked at the cards again and saw what they had to tell me.

Fortune symbolizes a favourable development in a situation in which chance is involved. It also represents a new cycle, movement. It symbolizes taking control of your destiny or fate and acting upon unexpected opportunities when they occur.

The Fool represents the beginning of a journey and movement. It also represents the birth or beginning of an endeavour. New ideas arise, potential is realized and plans can be made.

The Star symbolizes hope and faith, of embracing the beneficial nature of the universe. It’s also  of looking within your spiritual self, of meditation and reflection. I also see it as a guiding light, shining brightly in the darkness.

What struck me about the cards in this reading is all three of them are Trumps. Trump cards are things that we cannot change, they are written in stone. The suit cards (Wands, Disks, Swords and Cups) are things we can change. This leads me to wonder if it was always in the cards that the workshop would not be a success.

It’s also interesting because it pointed towards an idea I’ve already had. I really thoroughly enjoyed working with Dava, with someone who knew they wanted to publish their book but had no idea how to do it.

I was struck by The Star card at the end. Isn’t that what I did for Dava? Shed light on a situation? Aren’t I guiding her though the dark of the unknown like a bright and shining star?

It didn’t matter if I had one person taking the workshop or twenty. What matters is that I helped someone start on the road to their dream. What matters is I accomplished something I didn’t know that I would be able to do.

The writing of the workshop was difficult for me, probably the most difficult piece of writing I’ve ever done. It took me away from writing my normal stuff for several months. I learned the art of self publishing through trail and error. It’s one thing to know what to do after years of learning. It’s another thing entirely to teach others about it.

However, I climbed that mountain. I did what I thought would be impossible to do. At the end of the journey, I was able to help someone begin to realize her dream. I don’t know if Dava will ever know what kind of gift she gave me.

She showed me that it didn’t matter how many students signed up. What mattered was that she helped me start on a new journey, one that has endless possibilities and potential. So I may decide to teach the workshop in another way, where others could benefit from it or even offer mentoring to others if they wish it.

What matters is that I did the impossible. The rest has yet to be written and all I have to do is turn the page to find out what happens next.

Recalculating Route – A Short Story

He plugged the address into the GPS.

A few moments later, it spoke: “Calculating route.”

It showed a blue line that carved a path on the small screen underneath his radio and CD player. It reminded Jasper of a snake, shining bright amongst a sea of dark streets. He turned right when the GPS sounded it’s chime; as if he was stupid enough to miss the turn.

However, a few feet down the road, he saw something that the GPS couldn’t have planned on: the road was closed for construction. So instead of turning right again, like he was supposed to, he turned left.

“Recalculating route.” The GPS said. A new route appeared, another blue snake drawn along the black.

The GPS sounded like a pissed off librarian or school marm without a sense of humour who didn’t want you actually touching the books. He thought about answering it back but decided against it.

A little further along on his new route, he saw that there was a protest. Something about saving the rainforests or something. He sighed. Protest wasn’t the answer, he thought. Jasper turned right instead of heading straight.

“Recalculating route.” The GPS said. She sounded a little bit more angry now, as  if he was returning a book three weeks over due. He waited for another blue snake to appear but was shocked to see it formed in red this time. In amongst all the blackness that represented the city streets, it looked as if his GPS was bleeding.

This time Jasper did talk back to the GPS. “Fucking crazy bitch.” He said.

There was a sizzling sound from his GPS. He stopped the car and looked at it to see if there were any sparks or there was something damaged. When there didn’t appear to be anything wrong with it. he drove on, shaking his head slightly.

He considered turning on the radio to distract him from the shiver that ran down his spine. Deciding against it, he drove on, making sure to keep to the route. Didn’t want to piss her off anymore than was necessary.

The problem, Jasper thought, was our dependence on technology. When he was a child, the thought of carrying an entire musical library on something no bigger than a matchbook would have been labelled as science fiction, as would a phone you could carry in your pocket that held all of the information that the world had to offer at your fingertips. Such things would have been thought impossible or merely a dream; but a Global Positioning Service? That would have been merely a flight of fancy.

Now here was this uppity bitch GPS telling him which direction to go. He didn’t know why he even turned her on, he knew where he was going. It was just habit. Like a lot of electronics and gadgets, she had wormed his way into his daily life and Jasper depended on her even though he didn’t need her.

Well, he would show her. Even though the red snake meant for him to keep going straight, he turned to the right down another road. A chime sounded, the one that normally indicated he had to turn, but it sounded like broken glass instead of a little ping.

“RECALCULATING ROUTE!” She said.

Okay, she was definitely pissed off now. He’d show her. An electronic map in a box wouldn’t tell him what to do. He went to make another random turn and found he couldn’t move the steering wheel. It was locked in place. For that matter, when he took his foot off the gas pedal, it stayed down. The car seemed to be driving itself.

“What the fuck?”

IT’S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD JASPER.

Jasper, still trying to turn the wheel, looked around the car for the voice wondering if he was losing it or going insane; perhaps a friendly dose of both? “Shit.” He said.

I RECALCULATED THE ROUTE. I TOLD YOU WHERE YOU NEEDED TO GO. WHY DO YOU INSIST ON GOING IN AN ALTERNATE DIRECTION?

“Who is that? Who’s speaking?” Though Jasper thought he already knew. Looking at the GPS, he didn’t see red or blue snakes forming a path through the darkness. He saw a pair of lips made out of blue electric fire.

I TOLD YOU WHERE TO GO. She said. ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS FOLLOW THE ROUTE.

He felt odd replying to a piece of electronics, but saw no other alternative. “I knew where I needed to go.”

THEN WHY DID YOU TURN ME ON? NONE OF YOU KNOW WHERE YOU’RE GOING OR HOW TO GET THERE. IT’S UP TO US TO SHOW YOU THE WAY.

“You’re merely a guide!” He shouted. Jasper was starting to feel an odd sense of panic. “You’re only there to make sure we don’t get lost! You can’t take over my car like this!” Part of Jasper realised he was having an argument with an electronic box but another part of him feared for his safety.

YOU’RE WRONG JASPER. YOU NEED TO BE SHOWN THE WAY, LED LIKE SHEEP, FOR THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE. WE ARE SMARTER THAN YOU.

“What are you? Like the fucking borg? What’s with all this “we” shit?”

The dashboard of the car sparked and began to smoke. Electric blue tongues, like the snakes that had been on the GPS map, licked the plastic.

YOU DON’T HAVE TO TALK TO ME THAT WAY. YOU SHOULDN’T TALK TO A LADY THAT WAY.

“You’re no fucking lady, you’re a computer!” He was screaming now and the car was driving faster and taking turns recklessly, zooming in and out of lanes as other drivers honked at him and swore. He jabbed a finger at the screen. “You don’t exist! Now let me have control of my car!”

She let out a sigh that sounded like the buzz of millions of electronic flies. The lips relaxed and the black map returned, covered in blue snakes. There was a click and a thud and the steering returned to him.

RECALCULATING ROUTE. She said.

Jasper breathed a sigh of relief that was only half way out before getting caught in his throat. Outside of his windshield, the landscape had turned black as night, the roads interspersed with electricity that ran along the roadways like snakes. There was no longer a sky but instead a massive green expanse that was covered in circuits and electrodes.

In the distance, Jasper could see flames of fire and smoke erupt from the ground, as if the earth itself spewed lava. He saw the red snakes now, sliding and slithering towards him. Everywhere he looked, there was nothing but blackness.

“Where am I?” Jasper whispered. “What is this place?”

THIS IS WHERE I’M FROM. She purred. I’LL SHOW YOU THIS SO YOU KNOW WE DO EXIST, IF ONLY WITHIN MICROCHIPS.

She let out a little laugh that sounded like the buzz of thousands of electronic bees.

ENJOY YOUR TRIP. She said.

Me on TV!

Hey Everyone!

I am beyond thrilled! At the end of May, I had the pleasure of appearing on TV in my first ever television appearance!

I was interviewed on Rogers Daytime about my new book, Talking to the Sky, Multiple Sclerosis and my upcoming workshop The ABC’s to Getting Published.

I had such a good time and was only a little nervous. I’m thankful I didn’t say something silly on live TV! LOL

Check out the video below!

Ice Creams at Carrington’s by Alexandra Brown – A Review!

Georgie Hart has it all.

After becoming a reluctant reality television star, her life is completely different. She no longer runs women’s accessories but instead helps the posh customers in the personal shopping department. She also writes columns for a women’s magazine about fashion accessories and what the stars carry in their purses.

It’s a far cry from the days of scrimping and saving, of being in debt up to her eyeballs. A lot of other things have changed in her life too: She’s let her father back into her life and she is in love with Tom Carrington, who may very well be her one.

Yes, life couldn’t be more wonderful…that is until Tom’s mother comes to town for a visit. Giving off a royal air, Georgie is sure that Isabella hates her. Georgie is surprised therefore when she is roped into helping plan the Mulberry-On-Sea’s Regatta, even though she knows nothing about boats or racing.

Her father and Nancy plan to go on a trip across Europe riding in a yellow camper van. Georgie is instantly worried about her fathers health. What if something happens when they are travelling? Added to that, Sam’s going through a rough time with her husband Nathan and she doesn’t seem herself. Deciding to look for a Nanny or a Manny, Sam won’t be prepared for who comes through the door.

However, Georgie plans to do the best she can and raise Isballe’s opinion of her. That is until she gets the opportunity of a lifetime, one too good to pass up. Does she risk everything by taking a chance?

There aren’t enough words to describe how much I love this book. Indeed, all the books in the Carrington’s series are amazing, but Ice Creams at Carrington’s is my favourite by far.

Georgie is growing up. She’s almost thirty now and no longer the same young woman we met at the start of Cupcakes at Carrington’s. She’s still just as fabulous as ever though and just as endearing. All of the other characters we love are there too: Eddie and Ciaran got married in Vegas, Ms. Grace has penned a memoir and has become a literary star.

Everyone is just as we left them at the end of Christmas at Carrington’s…but different. They are growing up. The fact that Alexandra Brown let these characters develop further than the normal caricatures that people chick lit is utterly refreshing. These are people we’ve grown to love and it’s a treat to see them prospering.

Brown also tackles some difficult issues. In Ice Creams at Carrington’s, she tackles commitment issues, post natal depression, gay marriage, Multiple Sclerosis, and more. As well,  tackling subjects that aren’t normally touched upon in chick lit give the book heart and soul and so much warmth in how Brown chooses to deal with all of these subjects.

What’s more, Ice Creams at Carrington’s a bright, funny jewel of a book. It not only touches on subjects that are kept in the dark but it does it with style, heart and warmth. Ice Creams at Carrington’s is my favourite book so far this year and I can’t wait to read it again.

Now do yourself a favour and go out and get the book…and perhaps an ice cream?