Dianna Booher's Blog, page 28

5 Ways to Sift Damage from Direct Communication

Whether you’re delivering a presentation, emailing a client, or disciplining your teen, direct communication is good. Damaging communication, on the other hand, can destroy a sale, credibility, or a relationship forever.

Why does someone consider a remark over-the-top terrible, while another person interprets the same comment as direct, clear, straightforward, even prudent?  Why does one media outlet report a politician’s remark as a huge blunder, while another media outlet reports the sam...

4 Misconceptions About How to Be an Engaging Speaker

An executive coaching client shared this goal with me:  “I want to become a more inspiring speaker so my employees really become engaged and catch the vision for this upcoming year.”

The backstory:  According to the CEO, this senior leader Tyler, who’d assumed the role of plant manager three years earlier, did not get along well with his 3,000-plus employees. They saw him as insincere and aloof. He definitely had not won their confidence as part of the leadership team, and the CEO could no...

What to Say to Someone When Their Loved One Dies

Three times in the past year, I’ve had the sad occasion to have a friend lose a spouse through death: car accident, heart attack, and cancer. As I attended the visitation and memorial service, I couldn’t help but notice how many people seemed at a loss about what to say to their friend or coworker to bring comfort.

Of course, just your presence shows concern, respect, and caring. Certainly a friend or coworker appreciates a warm hug or any act of kindness during such a difficult time.

But...

How to Control Dominators in Meetings

Meetings often unfold similar to encounters on the playground: Passive and dominating attendees annoy each other and complicate things.

So why not simply let the passive meeting participants fade into the woodwork and let the dominators take over the game board? Several reasons:

Dominators monopolize and prevent other ideas and solutions from surfacing. Dominators often ramble and repeat themselves, creating boredom and impatience among the other group members. The biased opinion of one o...

If You Want to Be Happy, Practice Gratitude

The holidays create a great season to bring more happiness into your life. The best way? Reflect on all the things in your life that help you, move you forward, make you smile, and give you satisfaction.

Feelings of gratitude lead to love, generosity, compassion, joy, energy, service. The engine of gratitude is mindfulness. Its fuel is activity.

Feelings of gratitude lead to love, generosity, compassion, joy, energy, service.
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So How Do You “Practice” Gratitude? Start wit...

4 Ways Leaders Make Their Communication Clear

As a leader, you’ve probably asked your team dozens of times, “Do you understand?” But I’ll wager you’ve rarely have had anyone respond, “No, I don’t get it.” Instead, they nod, smile, and remain silent, thinking they’ll figure it out later. Some do; some don’t.

The best leaders know that the burden to be understood falls on their shoulders. The person with the message has the most urgent need to communicate it. That’s true even when you’re the person with the problem. If you can’t state a...

Interviewing, Emceeing, Q&A From the Audience: Tips for Difficult Situations

I recently attended an event where journalist Judy Woodruff interviewed famed architect Santiago Calatrava. That interview surfaced two issues that show up routinely in the workplace: at management and sales meetings, at industry conferences, and during all-hands employee meetings.

What do these venues have in common? Frequent programming that features “interviews.” Moderators hosting a panel of experts. Emcees talking with guests from the audience. Speakers asking for input from volunteer...

8 Ways to Improve the ROI of Staff Meetings

Ray, our COO many years ago, used to start meetings with 10-15 minutes of chit-chat. While his intention was to promote socializing, the effect was late-arrivers, difficulty in focusing at the start of serious discussion, and low energy throughout the rest of the meeting.

I’ve sat through meetings in which attendees fidgeted with their devices, worked on other projects, or left the room repeatedly to take other calls. Such behavior is a career mistake for the attendee and a costly timewast...

Email Greetings: You Lost Me at Hello

In the movie Jerry Maguire, Tom Cruise barges into his home after an argument and long separation from his wife, starts an explanation meant as an apology, and makes a romantic plea: “You complete me…  You…”

She interrupts, “You had me at hello.”

In case you don’t recall the entire plot, let me just say the similarity to email greetings stops there:  Your email readers are not in love with you. (Okay, maybe your family members love you.) And even if emailing best friends, chances are they...

MORE on How to Handle Hostile Questions—Part 2

Handling hostile questions can be more than an uncomfortable five minutes with your project team or an embarrassment with your executive officer. If fumbled badly in a highly visible setting, these questions can stall or end your career. I’ve seen it happen.

Last week’s blog presented two techniques for responding to these tough questions. Here are two more techniques you’ll find useful at some point as you deliver a presentation, meet with a client, or negotiate a partnership.

 

How to Re...