Stephanie Jankowski's Blog, page 34
October 29, 2014
Suburban Haiku, A Giveaway, & Love At First Syllable
Those who say so much yet speak so few wordshave always earned my admiration. These people are like walking, talking Twitter feeds: zeroing in on only the essentials and then leaving you alone with your thoughts to mull over the information in the comfort of your own brain. Take my husband for example: his gift […]
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October 28, 2014
I Ain’t Afraid of No Ghost! But Common Core Math Is Another Story…
My brother can’t hold his sugar. His beer is one thing, but sweets? Not so much.I’ll never forget the Halloween that ended in his night terror that woke the whole house. He was shriekingat the top of his lungs that a Snickers bar with a knife was chasing him. He was screaming and sweating, and […]
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October 27, 2014
Oversharing: Double D Disaster — A Bra Shopping Tale of Woe
My children have basically ruined my breasts. Once perky and full, they are now sad, deflated balloons found shriveled and embarrassedbehind the couch a month after the party: they tried to remain afloat, but gravity and grubby hands got the best of them and finally brought them to their demise. All this to say I […]
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October 23, 2014
Giveaway: Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey’s Built To Amaze!
I’m making plans for you and your family. Ready? On November 5th or 6th–you pick, I’m not that bossy–you’ll be heading to the CONSOLEnergy Center to witness the greatest show on earth. That’s not hyperbole, either; it’strademarked and stuff. If you’ve no idea what the CONSOLis, you’re probably not from Pittsburgh, and that means I […]
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October 21, 2014
Oversharing: From the Mouths of Babes
We all have that onefacial feature we’d like to change, or a body qualm that, try as we might, we just can’t come to terms with. Some of us, like myself, would like to decrease the amount of junk in her trunk. Others would rather–ahem–augment. Today’s Oversharer is no different; Amanda dreams of the day […]
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October 20, 2014
Meet My Friend Nelle
There are more of me, you know. More crazy ladies who are sick of pumping their kids full of over the counter medicine every cold and flu season, dousing their little hands in alcohol-laden sanitizers and soaps. There are otherwomen trying to do the all-natural thing without losing semblance of and appreciation for modern science […]
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October 17, 2014
My New Mantra
“I participated in Influencer Activation on behalf of Mom Central Consulting for Baby Mantra. I received product samples to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for participating.” In 2009, I gave birth to the child with the most sensitive skin EVAH. He had beautiful, porcelain skin, easilyravaged by sun, wind, […]
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October 14, 2014
Oversharing: You May Remember Me From Walmart
When I started blogging, I stumbled upon a little corner of the interwebs called Bad Parenting Moments. From the name, I thought I was in for a dose of Pinterest fail-y stuffs and a fellow mom’s admission that imperfection is the thread whichholds her days together, too. Power in numbers, people. Anyway, I couldn’t have […]
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October 13, 2014
10 Signs That My Frat Party Days Are Over
Over the weekend,a bunch of 30-somethings intent on reliving our glory days took to a friend’s basement to christen his new bar. We had ourselves a barwarming party, if you will. It was Parents’ Night Out. Weeeee! Even when I was in high schoola legal 21-year-old, I couldn’t hold my liquor. Afew drinks and I’d […]
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October 8, 2014
And I Was So Excited When They Learned To Talk…
Fairly well-versed in humiliating myself, usually via foot in mouth, I’m no stranger to embarrassment. At least, I think that’s what it’s called. It’s second-nature to me at this point soI barely notice when I’ve said something…inappropriate? Unwelcome? Off. Yes, let’s just call it “off.” It’s not that I set out to intentionally make those […]
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