Pete Sutton's Blog, page 2

I said Hey, What’s Going On?

4 Non-Blondes reference there for those of us who remember the 90’s.

I’ve just been for another blood test, PA goes hand in hand with other intolerances and deficiencies so they’re testing me for various things. I am still coming to terms with adding yet another chronic health condition to the ones I was already coping with. And given the kind of person I am I’ve been reading all the books on the subject (for which I’ll do a review roundup in another post) because of which I’ve made less headway on WAWAW than I’d have liked. But I’d like to do a review round up there ‘soon’ too (for a given value of soon). I have, before the wheels fell off, read five books in the WAWAW category so I do have something to say.

On the fiction front I owe the BFS a review for one book and I’ve been reading books bought recently. On that front I really enjoyed Getting By In Tligolian by Roppotucha Greenberg where the city of Tligol has trains that can travel in time, a benign fishing giant and is ruled by dictators who perform public executions.

And I’m currently reading The Maniac by Benjamin Labatut which has a fantastic opening:

“On the morning of the twenty-fifth of September 1933, the Austrian physicist Paul Ehrenfest walked into Professor Jan Waterink’s Pedagogical Institue for Afflicted Children in Amsterdam, shot his fifteen-year-old son, Vassily, in the head, then turned the gun on himself.”

I’ve made progress on BFS Horizons which has suffered somewhat from my health and life issues, but hopefully the delays experienced over the last couple of years will not carry on into the future. Watch this space.

Also my time as one of the judges for the short story competition has now finished with my recommendations given. And I turned in another copyedit for a publisher thus keeping my freelancing ticking over.

So, despite appearances to the contrary, things are slowly beginning to happen again on the writing front.

Writing About Writing About Writing 29

Part 29 of an intermittent series where I read or re-read the writing books on my shelf to see if they’re worth keeping. See previous part here and Index of all books here.

So – time to dust this off I guess. I haven’t read much since #28 so will be doing a bit of a reset. I have, though, been reblogged by Milford SF and now that I’ve come out of the fog I see that over time the ‘reviews’ of the writing books have become shorter and shorter. I should probably go back to longer reviews.

Slight detour into health status. I’ve had my initial treatment for PA and it wasn’t enough. I have to wait three months to next injection of B12 and by all accounts this 3 month periodicity is not enough for most sufferers and so I’m taking sub-lingual B12. The jury is out on that one – I had very bad fatigue last couple of days (although slightly better today). However I did climb a mountain in Scotland last week. When we set off for that walk I didn’t feel like I had enough energy to walk the two and a half miles even if they were flat (and they were far from flat). But I persevered and got a second wind from somewhere and I made it to the top. (we walked from below that forest in the distance but not quite from the town itself)

(Photo by author)

This wouldn’t be an issue for most people and during the pandemic when we were allowed outside I’d regularly go for 10-12 mile walks. A few weeks before being diagnosed I was exhausted after doing a 5 mile walk on the flat. So climbing Ben Vrackie seems like a major achievement. The fact I’ve just put together a blog post seems to indicate that my mental health is a bit better too. So I have plans but tasks seem so Sisyphyean lately.

(Picture by Chaz Hutton.)

My shelf of writing books is double-stacked (again) and I do want to get back to the writing lark, so…

They’re currently themed in:

Poetry – I have a mixed relationship with poetry, I like it and would like to write it, am a published poet in fact, but I’ve never really understood it apart from at a visceral level and I’m not sure that’s good enough. As it feels more difficult than prose I may leave it a while – try and get back into writing for a while before considering it.

Creativity – From Freud’s ‘On Creativity and the Unconscious’ to Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s ‘Creativity’ with a diversion via Howard Gardner’s ‘Art, Mind and Brain,’ I got interested in how creativity works. But these are fairly technical and dry books so I’ve been putting them off.

Process – I have a bunch of “The Way We Write” books (actual title of one of these books) that are about process.

Literature Class – I have a half dozen or so ‘How to Write’ books on the shelf still.

Stories and how they were edited – another half-dozen of the books are on revising, usually with examples.

Scriptwriting – A whole quarter of the books I’ve yet to get to are to do with writing for games, theatre and film.

Philosophy of Writing – Another quarter are on highfalutin esoterica of writing and the role of writers in society.

Miscellaneous – And then there are a few books on typography and language that are writing adjacent.

Prompts – and finally there are the prompt books.

It feels to me that I should tackle this renewed WAWAW structurally – read books on creativity first, then How To’s, then Process, Editing, Philosophy, then tackle the prompts and move on to miscellaneous and ‘other’ writing at the end.

There’s probably a year’s worth of reading on that double-stacked shelf without touching the books I’ve previously decided to keep. I’d best get to it. I am aware though that planning isn’t my forte and quite often the previous blog posts have ended on “and so I’m going to do *this*” and then I completely fail to do whatever *this* is. But anyway, line in the sand cognizant of incoming tide…

Drop a comment with your favourite writing book or tip here or email me via the Contact page. If you’re a publisher or Indie Author and would like me to review your writing book drop me a line!

I would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for…

OK so it’s been a while. And there’s a reason for that. One that was not at all obvious until a random blood test revealed the true culprit.

Random letter number combination? No, Vitamin B12 deficiency. I have pernicious anemia (means it’s not diet related – my lovely autoimmunity has found another target) – and alongside fatigue, which I have only been feeling recently, there are a host of neurological symptoms that include apathy and depression. B12 deficiencty takes a while to develop and I think, looking back, I started to have symptoms around 2018/19.

I have debated even doing this blog post – basically because withdrawal is very much my feeling du jour. Wanting to withdraw and fade into the background like Homer Simpson into a hedge is also not good for a writing career obviously. So the stories I wrote in 2020/21 (which was pretty much the last burst of writing I did) have sat in a folder on my computer since. I should edit and release into the wild but am not motivated to do so.

I am not at Worldcon this weekend even though I bought a ticket partly because dates didn’t gel but also due to not having the energy to sort out travel and accommodation. And there’s that whole withdrawal thing too. I didn’t fill in the form to be on the programme and I just don’t want to socialise. I had a particularly bad time time last year at some of the cons I attended. I spent more time in my room alone at Eastercon than was healthy (I see now) and spent more time outside the con than inside at BristolCon. I don’t really remember much of FantasyCon – can you prove I was even there?

This is starting to sound like a public confession and that feels very uncomfortable.

I am having injections of B12, they should help. (This blog has been brought to you by B12 injection). Maybe soon I can go back to having the usual levels of procrastination.

In other news – Grimbold folded and I am in the process of self-publishing my books, more when that happens, it’s been a slow process so far because of . I’ll also be publishing some other Grimmies. When I scrape enough mojo together I’ll work out how to sell things through this site.

I am still editing BFS Horizons and although there have been some extrinsic factors causing the publications to slow down I hope people will be a little forgiving of the fact I’ve also been slow on this.

I’m not sure if I’ll ever feel like publishing the existing stories I need to edit or, indeed, write any more and I may well permanently withdraw from the groups I temporarily withdrew from this year due to bereavement (life events have really not helped these past two or so years). I’ve not decided. But it has very much dented the Writing About Writing About Writing series which was mostly fuelled by procrastinating from actual writing by reading about it and then blogging about that. Not having the inclination to write has meant the shelf of writing books grew until it was full. The urge to buy them was eventually quenched, but it took a while. That TBR needs to be reduced again.

Between 2013 (when I started writing) and 2021 I had written, published, edited or contributed to over 40 books and numerous blogs here and as a guest elsewhere. Since 2021 I think there has been one book, and that’s now problematic (involving as it does Neil Gaiman). It’s possible that now I am having treatment there’ll be more in the future. But now I feel very vulnerable posting this and am going to go back to fading into the background.

Writing About Writing About Writing 28

Part 28 of an intermittent series where I read or re-read the writing books on my shelf to see if they’re worth keeping. See previous part here and Index of all books here.

So I haven’t yet done the Year of Buying NO Books and a Climb Mount TBR challenge blog, which I said would be in January. I have for the past few years had a target to reduce the TBR and not only have I failed to reduce it I’ve actually added to it. And now there’s no more room on the shelves. So a radical approach is needed – no more new books! Well, it’s a 1 in 1 out approach. If I buy a book I have to get rid of one on the TBR. But the aim is to buy no new books this year (I’m sure friends will ignore this and release books and I’ll have to buy them or I’d be a bad friend.) So, let’s see how that goes! – I ignore January as that’s when my birthday is, and Xmas – and ‘acquiring’ books may not count – if people happen to give me books or I receive ARCs, ebooks, although they don’t take up shelf space still count against the 1 in 1 out rule.

WAWAW has gone slowly since the last post but I’m starting to read books I have on a related tangent (books about creativity) that I’ll add to this – although not specifically about writing. I’ll also read books about writing that are on the TBR and blog about both.

One book I did read off the writing shelf though is Unstuck

This is supportive and written by someone who has overcome crippling writers block and full of things to try – but, like writing exercises in ‘how to’ books I didn’t do them as I went along and now there’s a resistance to picking it back up to work through them. I think this is a good writing block book and it’s currently on the ‘to keep’ pile at least until I come back round to the writers block section again and then it’ll be measured against the ones I need to re-read.

However I have written a story this year – and plan to write more. I’ve joined two crit groups and a write in group so am hoping that this will spur me to creating a lot more this year when compared to last year (watch this space). I also have a dozen or more stories written during and just post-pandemic that I need to evaluate and revise.

Drop a comment with your favourite writing book or tip here or email me via the Contact page. If you’re a publisher or Indie Author and would like me to review your writing book drop me a line!

That’s a wrap

I no longer go in for long posts on what I did or didn’t do in the year – maybe next year I’ll keep better records? I did publish a book, so that was nice:

I also read 123 books – which is about average for me.

– 40 by women, 11 by people of colour
As usual the main nationalities of writers are UK & USA but this year I also managed to read authors from Canada, Egypt, Nigeria, Vietnam, Argentina, France, Germany, Japan, Portugal, Spain and South Korea
19 books were DNF
6 hardbacks
55 paperbacks
62 e-books – this is way up on previous years, probably why my TBR is out of control!
9 Graphic Novels
5 books of poetry
5 books of short stories
82 nonfiction
22 fiction
Lowest and highest page length (for physical books) = 90 & 492

I only highlighted three as “Brilliant”

Excellent analysis of historical Judge Dredd crossed with the history of policing, very thought-provoking

Fabulous gothic tale set at a hydropathic asylum during WW1.

Brilliant CYOA GN with an existential AI -really well planned out, great story and tricksy. Seems that it was the cover looks like…

In 2024 I hope to publish more books (I have plans) and also read more Brilliant books.

Hope if you’re reading this you have a wonderful end to 2023 and here’s to a fabulous 2024 for all of us!

Writing About Writing About Writing 27

Part 27 of an intermittent series where I read or re-read the writing books on my shelf to see if they’re worth keeping. See previous part here and Index of all books here.

And suddenly it’s December and there’s a bunch of books I’ve read but neglected to blog about…

Kae Tempest’s On Connection was a short book about suddenly not having an audience connection because of Covid. What’s a performance poet once performance is taken away? Interesting but ultimately only tangentially related.

Harold Evans is an editor and in ‘Do I make Myself Clear’ he talks, at length, about clarity in prose. OK I think but ultimately no new info in here – lots of examples but if you’ve read Orwell’s Politics and the English Language and your Gowers this is superfluous. If you haven’t then this may be worth a go.

Pretty decent go at explaining how to plot – picked this up in a charity shop, won’t keep it as although a good overview it offers nothing new – good for beginners.

The philosophy of writing and being a writer – Atwood is on good form here and I enjoyed this.

This is well-written and a decent overview of ten topics such as POV, Character, Theme, Dialogue etc – again great if you’ve not come across this info elsewhere, but it is the basics with only a small spin from the author.

Always enjoyed anything I’ve read by Swift and this was no exception. A mix of essays on all sorts of topics but many on writing and the writing life.

I might have time/inclination/energy to do a book wrap up post – but usually I find a ‘that was the year that was’ goes better in a new year – but the beginning of the year is usually busy as I have a birthday. So maybe I will, maybe I won’t.

What I am going to try though is to have a Year of Buying NO Books and a Climb Mount TBR challenge. Which I will blog about in January – and OK this will, no doubt, include a wrap up of this year and why I am taking this radical approach.

Drop a comment with your favourite writing book or tip here or email me via the Contact page. If you’re a publisher or Indie Author and would like me to review your writing book drop me a line!

Writing About Writing About Writing 27

Part 27 of an intermittent series where I read or re-read the writing books on my shelf to see if they’re worth keeping. See previous part here and Index of all books here.

And suddenly it’s December and there’s a bunch of books I’ve read but neglected to blog about…

Kae Tempest’s On Connection was a short book about suddenly not having an audience connection because of Covid. What’s a performance poet once performance is taken away? Interesting but ultimately only tangentially related.

Harold Evans is an editor and in ‘Do I make Myself Clear’ he talks, at length, about clarity in prose. OK I think but ultimately no new info in here – lots of examples but if you’ve read Orwell’s Politics and the English Language and your Gowers this is superfluous. If you haven’t then this may be worth a go.

Pretty decent go at explaining how to plot – picked this up in a charity shop, won’t keep it as although a good overview it offers nothing new – good for beginners.

The philosophy of writing and being a writer – Atwood is on good form here and I enjoyed this.

This is well-written and a decent overview of ten topics such as POV, Character, Theme, Dialogue etc – again great if you’ve not come across this info elsewhere, but it is the basics with only a small spin from the author.

Always enjoyed anything I’ve read by Swift and this was no exception. A mix of essays on all sorts of topics but many on writing and the writing life.

I might have time/inclination/energy to do a book wrap up post – but usually I find a ‘that was the year that was’ goes better in a new year – but the beginning of the year is usually busy as I have a birthday. So maybe I will, maybe I won’t.

What I am going to try though is to have a Year of Buying NO Books and a Climb Mount TBR challenge. Which I will blog about in January – and OK this will, no doubt, include a wrap up of this year and why I am taking this radical approach.

Drop a comment with your favourite writing book or tip here or email me via the Contact page. If you’re a publisher or Indie Author and would like me to review your writing book drop me a line!

Back on the horse?

I’ve had many kind words about my last post, about being lost in a labyrinth of my own making. Thanks to everyone who’s commented or commiserated. But it’s time to get back on the horse. I’ve submitted one piece of nonfiction to which I got a fabulous response (it’ll appear in a book at some point which I’ll definitely link to) – essentailly the editor’s reply was ‘wow this is one of the best responses,’ which is nice.

(Photograph by Colin Thomas)

Still working on the other piece. More on that in another post no doubt.

I’ve created two pitches and am starting to work on things, slowly approaching that horse that apparently I have to get back on. I am at week 8 of The Artist’s Way which I’m doing as a course with a support group of artists of various kinds – visual, sculptural and textual. The morning pages are running their fingers through the sludge that lurks at the bottom of my brain like bin juice (the official word for bin juice is leachate by the way) – I feel it is taking longer for me than some of the others in the group to get something useful out of it, but there may be some light ahead – despite heading into the darkest months.

I have read some more writing books so I’m due another Writing About Writing About Writing blogpost soon.

Hat tip to Neil Williamson who’s throwaway comment at FantasyCon has stuck with me and acted as a fertile ground upon which some seeds may be sown. He said: “Being a writer is feeling the fear and writing anyway.” So I’m hoisting my belt, taking a deep breath and approaching that skittish horse that once threw me.

Lost in a labyrinth of my own making

I’ve been asked to write a couple of pieces of nonfiction. At one time it was my deepest desire to be the kind of writer that people invited to produce work rather than endlessly chase submissions. But I find that now these invites have caught me unawares and, worse, feeling like an imposter.

I’ve not published anything for a while (reprints in Best of’s in 2021 were my last publications) and not really written anything for longer – of course publication generally follows some time after writing. So I feel like I have ceased being a writer and become someone who used to write and/or someone who will write in the future (at this point that’s just a hope). Because everyone tells you that writers write, right?

I won’t go into personal circumstances, but major life events that occurred last year aside there’s no one reason why I stopped. I tell myself this and immediately disagree – I mean the deeper, and one true, reason is, I think, the fear.

Because writing now induces a kind of panic followed by a dark depressive state and it is a labyrinth I am lost inside of, and it is of my own making – I have been unable to get out of my own way.

I have been able to edit though, been able to work on other people’s work and, in some cases, recognise that my own stuff was better. (Which sentence of course makes me wince at how arrogant it sounds)

Recently my friend Dolly (Hi Dolly!) put together a very useful post for writers who hate self-publicity and step 4 was “Own your talent” which was about being confident in your own work and learning to accept compliments with grace, which prompted me to respond that I have yet to learn step 4 – I am bad at taking compliments.

After a short discussion my flippant response was: “Much easier to not create anything and then you don’t need to promote it.” And really that’s part of the labyrinth. Another part is the fear of success – the last few things I’ve published have been shortlisted for awards and/or chosen for year’s best collections. And of course I don’t feel like I deserve this.

Another part is feeling like I can’t move on until I’ve finished, i.e. published, The Certainty of Dust which I’ve been writing since the before times (for oh so long) and yet also being lost in that – it doesn’t work, it could be fixed but do I have the chops to fix it? I know I should just get on another horse and write some shorts to conquer the fear of completion but somehow I can’t. In fact I have a bunch of short stories written that need revision and somehow that’s a task I can endlessly put off too…

And so, like Bartelby the Scrivener, at some point I decided – I would prefer not to.

And yet – like a zombie going through the motions of a life it’s deceased brain barely recalls – I do writerly things. I go on retreats. I go to writing meet ups. I am down to go to FantasyCon and BristolCon where I shall no doubt appear on panels and pretend I’m still a writer. I’ve signed up for a short course on The Artist’s Way and I think I need to learn Herbert’s litany against fear and use it daily while doing this course and maybe, possibly, I’ll find my way out of the labyrinth.

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

At FantasyCon I am on two panels:

Shortcraft – on Saturday as a moderator: What makes a good short story? How can the word limit play to your advantage? Our panel discuss writing short and their experiences.

Coincidentally this is also the topic of one of the pieces of nonfiction that I’ve been asked to write – so getting ready for the panel is also going to help me write that. Happy days.

And Roll the Dice! – on Sunday as a panelist – Roleplaying games are an adjacent creative industry to the craft of writing stories. So many elements of roleplaying games are relevant to how you can approach storytelling. Our panel share some experiences and advice from playing and creating roleplaying games that might be useful for new imagineers.

I have worked as an editor in the RPG market so I feel this is the experience I am bringing to this panel, although I have written plenty of adventures as well. Seven Deadly Swords harks back to a set of adventures written in the Vampire the Masquerade World of Darkness for example (I ran a campaign where the players were human hunters before there was a supplement for that.) Although it changed a lot in the writing.

In the meantime if you see me, don’t ask how the writing is going.

Writing About Writing About Writing 26

Part 26 of an intermittent series where I read or re-read the writing books on my shelf to see if they’re worth keeping. See previous part here and Index of all books here.

It’s been a while since I’ve done an update (whispers – 6 months!) on this ongoing task. It seems like the books on the shelf have bred as there are now more there even though I’m supposed to be, with this series of posts, whittling them down.

This time round here’s the books from this year so far:

The Clockwork Muse

Can be summed up as chunk your project, decide how much writing time you have, assign chunks to time available, write. But is a little more than that – a good primer on how to project manage a book.

Punk Publishing

Pretty good intro on how to become an indie author – nuts & bolts of book formatting. I picked this up at EasterCon from David Wake after being on a panel with him. What I like about this book, and why I’ve kept it, is the ‘punk’ attitude. Also has valuable formatting advice which I’ve not really seen elsewhere.

The 9 Modern Day Muses

Excellent how to get over your fears writing book that will need a revisit. Badonsky is the founder of Kaizen Muse and has broken down the creative process into anthropomorphic manifestations of Muses – updating the ancient Greek idea.

Writing For Story

This may be the only one of the four that’s upheld the ‘writing books have boring covers’ theme to WAWAW? Excellent resource for writers who are confused about structure – how to structure a story, not a play or screenplay, a story – so applicable to any of the many media stories can be told within. I’ve already re-read a few sections and think this will be a book to revisit often so definitely keeping on the shelf.

So now I’ve listed them out it’s not really a surprise that the last 6 months have seen the shelf grow as I’ve only read 4 books from the shelf! (and kept them all). Also the synchronicity here is that I started this series of posts in June 2020. I also said: ” I wrote more whilst learning to write in 2013-2016 than I wrote in 2017-2020 after being published and supposedly knowing what I’m doing. I’ve been blocked for a long time, or at least felt blocked (I have written a novel since this time last year so maybe not *that* blocked) and I’ve felt the need to give myself a boot up the backside and stop procrastinating and start writing more regularly again. Writers write right?” which is even more true now than it was 3 years ago.

As I said in my last post – I’ve not written anything this year & the revision of Certainty of Dust is stalled. I believe this is due to the fact I have to re-vision. I was thinking earlier in the year that I was going to have the book ready to publish this year. Now I’m not sure if it’ll ever be finished.

Revisiting Damon Knight’s layers of story (see WAWAW 16) there are 5 ‘layers’ to each story going (from top to bottom) – The Surface (the prose), Form (Short Story, Novel, Poem, Graphic Novel etc. – also if it’s “smooth, or intricate and knobbly”), the ‘Materials’ (Character, Setting, Situation, Emotion), the Idea (the premise) and the Impetus (why write).

“If the story fails at any level, it’s no use criticiszing it at a higher level. If the story is wrong at the level of ‘materials,’ for instance, it will fail no matter how good the Form and Surface are… find the earliest level where it fails and try to fix it there.”

So, the problem?

The Surface? The novel needs revision so not yet at copyediting (as a self-edit) phase as yet.

The Form? Should it be a novel? It’s currently longer than a novella and it doesn’t feel like I could cut it down, rather it needs building up.

The Materials? Possible issues here – but is this the level the problem is at? Character and Setting are a little out of focus.

The Idea? Hopefully the editors don’t mind me posting this feedback: “We both thought the premise was great and the writing was solid, with the main characters & their relationships holding a lot of potential.” – so, not the Idea then.

The Impetus? Back to Knight: “‘Impetus’ is the force that makes you want to write this story in the first place. If that force is just the desire to get published, or make money, or to ‘be a writer,’ the story will probably be weak. Of course you want to get published, and you’d like to make money, and you want to be a writer, but that’s not enough. Strong stories are made from things that are inside you wanting to get out.”

Did I start the novel with some ‘thing inside wanting to get out’? I’m not sure – I started this novel so long ago now that I’ve lost why I wanted to write it in the first place. I need to fall back in love with it. And that’s a whole other post…

Last time round (WAWAW 25) I said: “I will be doing a monthly email newsletter thingy as well – but WAWAW is likely to stay on the blog. All things being equal I’ll have a book out next year – The Certainty of Dust (provisional launch Summer ’23) as well as an anthology I’ve been editing this year (more on that in a following blog post).”

And I’ve not done a monthly newsletter (am still in two minds about it) and all things were not equal, as I’ve just explained. But the anthology did come out so it hasn’t been an entirely wasted year – and there’s 6 months left, right? This still could be a productive year. Maybe.

Drop a comment with your favourite writing book or tip here or email me via the Contact page. If you’re a publisher or Indie Author and would like me to review your writing book drop me a line!