Kris Calvert's Blog, page 107

Pearls don't lie on the shore. If you want one, you must dive for it.

Pearls don’t lie on the shore. If you want one, you must dive for it. –Chinese proverb
It’s coming. The day you either adore with your adorable other or the day you dread as a singleton. Valentine’s Day.
I was a single person for a very long time. A very long time. I’ve been with a significant other to celebrate Valentine’s Day and I’ve also been alone—utterly alone. It was in the alone years that I learned how to navigate holidays because let’s face it, I wasn’t just alone on February 14th, I was alone on all the other holidays too. And what I figured out over the years of sometimes being alone and sometimes not, was that on the so-called holidays that were meant for lovers, i.e. Sweetest Day and Valentine’s Day, it was more important to love myself.
So each year when I was alone, I did this little exercise where I wrote down all the things I liked about myself, such as: I’m a woman of independent means and I don’t need a man to take care of me financially. Or: I not only love sports, I understand and know sports. I would also take the time to write down what it was I was looking for in another person. It’s been said if you put out into the world what you want, the universe will listen. The key to this is actually putting it out there. So I did. I wanted someone who was as driven as I was, had an amazing sense of humor and was creative and intelligent in ways that I was not. So many times I will see on social media men and women publicly declaring their depression because they’re single. STILL single. But I must say, whining about it doesn’t bring the perfect soulmate into your world. The more you focus on all the things you don’t want in a man or woman, the more those very undesirable attributes show up in potential mates. I’m not just saying this, I’m speaking from experience. Girls, if you continue to say, I don’t want a self-centered player who won’t commit. Guess what? That’s exactly who will show up.
Guys, if you keep saying, I don’t want a crazy woman who’s possessive and smothers me to death. You got it, she’s going to keep knocking down your door.
How many times have you or your friends said, I’m a loser-magnet. Or, only the crazy chicks want to date me. The more you say it, the more they show up because you’re focusing on what you don’t want instead of what you do.
So this Valentine’s Day, do yourself a favor. Don’t feel alone or sad. Don’t eat your weight in sweets or feel sorry for yourself when the flowers start rolling into your workplace. Make your list. Put some positive vibes out into the world and see what happens. Intentions are powerful. Use them wisely.
As for me, I found my perfect person. It took a long time and I waded through a lot of heartache to get there. But when it happens what you discover is you don’t need a particular date like February 14th to celebrate love. Every day is Valentine’s Day when you truly love someone.




*Kris Calvert is an author of Thrillers, Romantic Suspense and Contemporary Romance.

See her books here: Kris Calvert Website
Buy her books on Amazon here: Kris Calvert on Amazon
Join her mailing list here: Kris Calvert Mailing List
Join her Facebook Group here: Kris Calvert's Books & Bits

Pearls don't lie on the shore. If you want one, you must dive for it.

Pearls don’t lie on the shore. If you want one, you must dive for it. –Chinese proverb
It’s coming. The day you either adore with your adorable other or the day you dread as a singleton. Valentine’s Day.
I was a single person for a very long time. A very long time. I’ve been with a significant other to celebrate Valentine’s Day and I’ve also been alone—utterly alone. It was in the alone years that I learned how to navigate holidays because let’s face it, I wasn’t just alone on February 14th, I was alone on all the other holidays too. And what I figured out over the years of sometimes being alone and sometimes not, was that on the so-called holidays that were meant for lovers, i.e. Sweetest Day and Valentine’s Day, it was more important to love myself.
So each year when I was alone, I did this little exercise where I wrote down all the things I liked about myself, such as: I’m a woman of independent means and I don’t need a man to take care of me financially. Or: I not only love sports, I understand and know sports. I would also take the time to write down what it was I was looking for in another person. It’s been said if you put out into the world what you want, the universe will listen. The key to this is actually putting it out there. So I did. I wanted someone who was as driven as I was, had an amazing sense of humor and was creative and intelligent in ways that I was not. So many times I will see on social media men and women publicly declaring their depression because they’re single. STILL single. But I must say, whining about it doesn’t bring the perfect soulmate into your world. The more you focus on all the things you don’t want in a man or woman, the more those very undesirable attributes show up in potential mates. I’m not just saying this, I’m speaking from experience. Girls, if you continue to say, I don’t want a self-centered player who won’t commit. Guess what? That’s exactly who will show up.
Guys, if you keep saying, I don’t want a crazy woman who’s possessive and smothers me to death. You got it, she’s going to keep knocking down your door.
How many times have you or your friends said, I’m a loser-magnet. Or, only the crazy chicks want to date me. The more you say it, the more they show up because you’re focusing on what you don’t want instead of what you do.
So this Valentine’s Day, do yourself a favor. Don’t feel alone or sad. Don’t eat your weight in sweets or feel sorry for yourself when the flowers start rolling into your workplace. Make your list. Put some positive vibes out into the world and see what happens. Intentions are powerful. Use them wisely.
As for me, I found my perfect person. It took a long time and I waded through a lot of heartache to get there. But when it happens what you discover is you don’t need a particular date like February 14th to celebrate love. Every day is Valentine’s Day when you truly love someone.




*Kris Calvert is an author of Thrillers, Romantic Suspense and Contemporary Romance.

See her books here: Kris Calvert Website
Buy her books on Amazon here: Kris Calvert on Amazon
Join her mailing list here: Kris Calvert Mailing List
Join her Facebook Group here: Kris Calvert's Books & Bits

Pearls don't lie on the shore. If you want one, you must dive for it.

Pearls don’t lie on the shore. If you want one, you must dive for it. –Chinese proverb
It’s coming. The day you either adore with your adorable other or the day you dread as a singleton. Valentine’s Day.
I was a single person for a very long time. A very long time. I’ve been with a significant other to celebrate Valentine’s Day and I’ve also been alone—utterly alone. It was in the alone years that I learned how to navigate holidays because let’s face it, I wasn’t just alone on February 14th, I was alone on all the other holidays too. And what I figured out over the years of sometimes being alone and sometimes not, was that on the so-called holidays that were meant for lovers, i.e. Sweetest Day and Valentine’s Day, it was more important to love myself.
So each year when I was alone, I did this little exercise where I wrote down all the things I liked about myself, such as: I’m a woman of independent means and I don’t need a man to take care of me financially. Or: I not only love sports, I understand and know sports. I would also take the time to write down what it was I was looking for in another person. It’s been said if you put out into the world what you want, the universe will listen. The key to this is actually putting it out there. So I did. I wanted someone who was as driven as I was, had an amazing sense of humor and was creative and intelligent in ways that I was not. So many times I will see on social media men and women publicly declaring their depression because they’re single. STILL single. But I must say, whining about it doesn’t bring the perfect soulmate into your world. The more you focus on all the things you don’t want in a man or woman, the more those very undesirable attributes show up in potential mates. I’m not just saying this, I’m speaking from experience. Girls, if you continue to say, I don’t want a self-centered player who won’t commit. Guess what? That’s exactly who will show up.
Guys, if you keep saying, I don’t want a crazy woman who’s possessive and smothers me to death. You got it, she’s going to keep knocking down your door.
How many times have you or your friends said, I’m a loser-magnet. Or, only the crazy chicks want to date me. The more you say it, the more they show up because you’re focusing on what you don’t want instead of what you do.
So this Valentine’s Day, do yourself a favor. Don’t feel alone or sad. Don’t eat your weight in sweets or feel sorry for yourself when the flowers start rolling into your workplace. Make your list. Put some positive vibes out into the world and see what happens. Intentions are powerful. Use them wisely.
As for me, I found my perfect person. It took a long time and I waded through a lot of heartache to get there. But when it happens what you discover is you don’t need a particular date like February 14th to celebrate love. Every day is Valentine’s Day when you truly love someone.




*Kris Calvert is an author of Thrillers, Romantic Suspense and Contemporary Romance.

See her books here: Kris Calvert Website
Buy her books on Amazon here: Kris Calvert on Amazon
Join her mailing list here: Kris Calvert Mailing List
Join her Facebook Group here: Kris Calvert's Books & Bits

"Your life will not go unnoticed, because I will notice it."

There’s a line in one of my favorite movies, Shall We Dance , when Susan Sarandon explains why she thinks people get married. It’s a wonderful sentiment, and not just for married people. The line is, “We all need a witness to our life…your life will not go unnoticed, because I will notice it.” 
I couldn’t think of a better way to cap off 2016 than with those very words.
This past year has seen its fair share of online rants and jabs. I’ve seen folks duke it out in a social media thread and threaten to cut ties with others because of different ideas and ideals. But I’ve also watched children grow and graduate. I’ve seen achievements, engagements, weddings and honeymoons, vacations, promotions, new jobs, new cars, new boyfriends/girlfriends and even the sharing of sorrows or watching hardships unfold. This brings me back to the line from the movie. Your life will not go unnoticed. I, and others like me, have noticed.
So as this year comes to a close and I look at what’s on the horizon in 2017, I wanted to say, thank you. Thank you for the priviledge of sharing your life with me and allowing me to share mine with you. If you commented on one of my posts, be it my professional or private life, read and reviewed one of my books, sent me a text or email, shared a new release, asked me about my husband or children, a new project or upcoming story, made it a point to find me at a book signing, chatted with me at a convention, or just called to say, hello, you’ve witnessed my life in 2016. I’m honored you allowed me to witnessed yours.
No one can say what might be in store in the coming year, but prehaps we can all agree on one thing moving forward: it’s important and powerful to be a witness to life—your own and those around you. 

Happy New Year. Best wishes for 2017. Be a Witness.
*Kris Calvert is an author of Romantic Suspense, Paranormal Suspense, Horror and Contemporary Romance.

See her books here: Kris Calvert Website
Buy her books on Amazon here: Kris Calvert on Amazon
Join her mailing list here: Kris Calvert Mailing List

Join her Facebook Group here: Kris Calvert's Books & Bits

What Could You Do With One More Day?

This February you will find an extra day in on your calendar. That’s because 2016 is a Leap Year.
I spent some time asking people—old and young—if they had an extra day in 2016, what they would do with it? Only one person knew I was referring to Leap Year. The others took it as a philosophical question. But when I explained that there were twenty-nine days in February, their answers stayed the same. These were the top two:
• Sleep • Catch up on XYZ (work, laundry etc.).
It struck me as odd that given an entire extra twenty-four hours this year, the majority of people wanted to do more of what we all do every day—work and sleep.
Then while at the airport, I posed the question to an older gentleman. His answer changed everything for me. He didn’t understand the question exactly the way I posed it—mostly because my Southern twang didn’t necessarily translate seamlessly with his Brooklyn accent, but it didn't matter. He understood something more important.
“If I had an extra day, I’d spend it with my wife. She’s been gone seven years now and I still miss her like crazy every day. She loved when I did little surprises just for her, for no reason at all.  You know?  I’d leave a note for her or bring her a cannoli from her favorite bakery. It would make her really happy. I’d do that. Just to see her smile. Yeah, that’s what I’d do for sure.”
So here is my challenge: on Monday, February 29th, the day we get once every four years, what if we all used our extra day to do a little surprise for someone—for no reason at all ?
I’ve heard it said that love is giving and expecting nothing in return. Most of us do this everyday—but love is sometimes an inward emotion. We think the people around us should intrinsically understand our feelings toward them. But what if we spent Leap Day 2016 showing love outwardly ?
• Call an old friend.• Mend a long-standing grudge. • Send a card or visit someone who’s unable to go out into the world. • Bake someone a treat. • Bring someone you’ve been thinking about flowers.• Tell someone you love how thankful you are they’re in your life.• Bake some cookies and drop them by your local fire or police station.• Draw a picture for someone (even if it's stick people).• Tell a co-worker how much you appreciate them.• Or, commit a random act of kindness for someone you don’t even know.
You don’t have to spend money to give people a piece of your love—a piece of your heart. Time is precious, so when we’re given an extra day, perhaps it’s smart to use it just as my friend from Brooklyn suggested: to make someone else happy— just to see them smile.


*Kris Calvert is an author of Romantic Suspense, Paranormal Suspense, Horror and Contemporary Romance.

See her books here: Kris Calvert Website
Buy her books on Amazon here: Kris Calvert on Amazon
Join her mailing list here: Kris Calvert Mailing List

Join her Facebook Group here: Kris Calvert's Books & Bits

Fifty Things I've Learned at Fifty.

Well it happened. I've hit the half century mark. December 30, 2015 will come and go like all the 18,250 days of my life, and tomorrow I will be fifty years and one day older.

I thought a lot about what I should say on my 50th birthday. It's better than the alternative crossed my mind for a hot second. Then there's you're only as old as your feel-- but there are days when I feel like I'm seventy and days when I feel thirteen. Instead I decided to jot down fifty things I've learned in the past fifty years--things that are true for me.

50.  Ask for what you want.
49. There will always be moments in life so packed with joy you’ll find it impossible to contain the happiness in your heart. Be in the moment and remember it for the days you want to cry and shout, “my life sucks!”
48. Be gracious and thankful. It’s important to let people know you appreciate them.
47. Understand your mortgage, stock portfolio and how loans and credit cards work. Bankers and accountants are invaluable and are happy to explain anything you find confusing. It’s not silly to ask—it’s silly not to ask.
46. Vote. You don’t have to tell everyone your political viewpoint—there’s a reason you vote in private—but exercise your American right.
45. Anyone who’s willing to put their life on the line for yours without knowing you is an altogether different kind of human being. Make it a point to thank first responders and military folks for their service.
44. Dove soap. There’s nothing better for your skin. There’s no need for fancy or expensive cleansers—just Dove soap. Spend money on moisturizers and don’t neglect your neck.
43.  Don’t worry about the dirty house or laundry. It’s gonna be there tomorrow and when it’s clean, it will get dirty again. Life is messy and it’s perfectly okay that your house isn’t always perfect.
42. There are going to be times in life that frankly—suck. People you love, trust, and look up to, will lie to you, disappoint you and even die. This is because life is imperfect and so are we. You’ll never get over these things, instead you’ll get past them. Life isn’t fair and it never will be, but learning to work through the unhappiness leads to finding happiness again.
41. If you put positive energy into the world you'll get it in return.
40. Exercise. No matter what.
39.  Eat the cake. No matter what.
38. Electric Hot Rollers = Big Hair. I love them both.
37. It’s okay to wear your pajamas all day every now and then. And Netflix won’t melt your brain.
36. Forgive yourself. That imperfect stuff goes both ways. *see #42.
35. Make plans for life knowing the path from point A to B isn’t a straight line but a rollercoaster. Try to enjoy the ride.
34. Mentoring is as much a gift for the mentor as it is for the student.
33. Read. Anything and everything.
32. You are always stronger than you think you are—mentally and physically.
31. Make friends and make time for friends. They’re the family you get to hand-pick.
30. From Mozart to Metallica, music is good for your soul.
29. Let grudges become non-factors in your life. Holding onto them gives them undeserved energy.  It’s okay to remember, but better to not to care or even better? Forgive.
28. There’s no substitute for siblings. Sharing parents and a childhood is powerful so stick close to them.
27.  There is room in a lifetime for more than one soul mate.  Believe me, I have first hand experience.
26. There is room in a lifetime for more than one career. Believe me, I have first hand experience.
25. Wear sunscreen. Believe me, I have first hand experience.
24. Caffeine and alcohol are best in moderation.
23. Wrinkles and gray hair are badges of honor. You earn them. Every. Single. One.
22. Lists. There’s power in marking things off of them.
21. Drink water.
20. There’s no substitute for a pet. A dog kiss can turn your day around quickly.
19. When your children leave for college, it's sad, but being an empty nester has its benefits. As Dr. Ruth once said, the first week you walk around crying—the second week you walk around naked.
18. When your children start doing things for themselves is the very moment they appreciate all that you’ve done for them in the past.
17. It’s important to splurge every now and then. My favorite? Shoes.
16. Heirlooms that are passed down don’t have to be extremely valuable to have worth. Sentimental value trumps monetary value every time.
15.  Don’t wait for someday because it will never come. Start now. Start today.
14. Get to know your grandparents. They are chock-full of sound advice and they won’t always be around to guide you.
13. The words, I love you are powerful. Use them.
12. Road rage will not get you to your destination any faster.
11. Trust your instincts. If it feels wrong, it probably is. The little voice in your head is God whispering in your ear.
10. Don’t worry about what others say about you. If it’s nice, you don’t need to know and if it’s bad, you don’t want to know.
9. Don’t sweat the petty stuff and don’t pet the sweaty stuff—but seriously…don’t sweat any of it.  Are you alive? Are your loved ones? Are you safe? Are your loved ones? If you answer yes, it’s a good day.
8. Don’t look back. Give up the what ifs, the couldas and shouldas. It’s wasted time you could be using to move forward and make new and exciting plans.
7. Write down all the important things you want your children to know in a journal. Even when you’re gone, you’ll be around to tell someone not to wear white after Labor Day.
6. You can’t please everyone. Don’t try and don’t lament over not doing so.
5. Smile. The simple act will change your attitude.
4. Hugs are powerful and a positive exchange of energy.  I tell people, “I’m a hugger” which is my way of asking if they care if I hug them before I go for the embrace. I’m rarely turned down.
3. Laugh. Laugh at everything that’s funny—including yourself.
2. There will be times when you’ll feel unworthy of love. Whether you tell yourself that or someone else tells you, know this: it’s a lie. If you are breathing, you are worthy. Let me say that again. You. Are. Worthy.
This brings me to number one.
1. Love yourself and accept who you are. You are uniquely made and there’s no one else in the world like you.



*Kris Calvert is an author of Romantic Suspense, Paranormal Suspense, Horror and Contemporary Romance. www.kriscalvert.com

Join her mailing list here: Kris Calvert Mailing List
Join her Facebook Group here: Kris Calvert's Books & Bits

Ladies, let's take a meeting.

After reading Alexandra Petri’s column “Woman in a Meeting” which was spurred by a discussion she had with a man over Jennifer Lawrence’s essay on gender pay gap, I wanted to—as a woman who’s run her own company as well as been the only female executive at others—share my two cents.
The whole idea behind the column was that women have to be careful what they say or they will come across as angry, threatening or bitchy. So she used famous quotes to illustrate her point.
Alexandra’s quotes are by innovators, leaders, igniters—the kind of folks who speak their mind—that’s why they’re leading. You can easily be a woman and be the boss. In fact there are more of us out there today than there were when I was twenty-two and took my first grown-up job. Now, twenty-some years later, I’m very aware of the women who came before me in the world of business and I am ever grateful that they made it easier for me to do my thing. Hopefully women like me are making it easier for future generations of working women.
That being said, here’s my beef with Ms. Petri’s words: Never, and I mean never, have I been in a meeting with a female executive or business owner who framed their statements or questions with phrases like, “I don’t know. It’s probably crazy. I feel like I’m rambling. I’m not an expert. or I’m sorry.”
F*** that . And I haveheard that out of a woman’s mouth in the boardroom and it may or may not have been me.
Is it easy being a female in a mostly male workplace? No. Is it easy being a woman and owning your own company? Nope. It isn't easy owning your own company—period.
Did I take a lot of crap for being a woman? Sure, but that is the price of doing business on any level. There’s crap…and lots of it. The ability to shift through it and take away what’s valuable is, in itself, valuable. And don’t kid yourself—as a leader, other women can be just as difficult to deal with as men. It’s simply hard being the boss.
Don’t get me wrong, I understand where Petri is coming from. As someone who’s been sexually harassed, called “Barbie in the boardroom” or told that I’d never make it, I realize women deal with a different landscape in the workplace than men. That doesn’t mean that it defines us. It doesn’t. In the end I’ve always told myself it didn’t matter I was a woman—because I’m smart, but really because I work hard.
Is it fair that this is the world we live in? A place where men usually make more money than women for the same job or are praised for speaking their mind when a woman is deemed a bitch for speaking up? No.
If I’ve tried to teach my kids one thing as they’ve grown into adults it’s that life isn’t fair. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t do or have what you want. You can. You just can’t let anyone tell you, no. Business is business. You aren’t there to make lifelong friends, but if you lead by example I can guarantee you’ll be popular in the long run.
Ladies, if you want something, you don’t have to ask for it. Make it happen. It’s not 1920—the year we finally got the right to vote—it’s 2015 and countless women before you have made more sacrifices than you can image so that you can walk into the “meeting” and not apologize for who you are or what you think.
Be fearless. Thatis the trait of a leader and a woman. If we weren’t fearless we wouldn’t be where we are today.
If you read Jennifer’s Lawrence’s essay on pay inequality, she blames no one but herself for not sticking up for herself.  She didn’t want to be a whiner or considered bitchy. But business isn’t a popularity contest and if you can’t stick up for yourself and your brand who will?
Finally, I wanted to translate some quotes that aren’t from John Paul Jones, Julius Caesar, Moses, JFK, FDR, MLK, Patrick Henry or any other man They are nonetheless, just as powerful.
“I am not afraid…I was born to do this.” –Joan of ArcStand back. I’ve got this.
“Though the sex to which I belong is considered weak you will nevertheless find me a rock that bends to no wind.” Elizabeth II’ve got this.
“I never dreamed about success. I worked for it.” –Estee LauderI’ve got this.
“We are not interested in the possibilities of defeat. They do not exist.” –Queen VictoriaI’ve got this.
“Growth and comfort do not coexist.” Ginni Rometty, CEO, IBMI’ve got this.
“Do not wait on a leader…look in the mirror, it’s you.”–  Katherine Miracle, Miracle Resources“I’ve got this.”
“Option A is not available. So let’s kick the sh** out of Option B.” ­– Sheryl Sandberg COO FacebookI’ve got this.
“I have a brain and I have a uterus and they both work.”  Pat Schroeder, Former CongresswomanI’ve got this. 
**Petri's original article can be found here: https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/compost/wp/2015/10/13/jennifer-lawrence-has-a-point-famous-quotes-the-way-a-woman-would-have-to-say-them-during-a-meeting/

Canadians Love their Slang as much as Southerners Love their Twang

Heading to Oh Canada and turning my y’all into an eh!
I’m leaving tomorrow for Canada and Romancing the Capital in Ottawa an event put together by one of my favorite authors, Eve Langlais. But a southern girl heading that far north? What I’ve discovered is that Canadians love their slang as much as Southerners love their twang. Check it out.
Canadian                                           Washroom or Biffy=Toilet                                         “I’ll be back in a jiffy. I’m just going to the biffy.”
SouthernLadies Room=Toilet“Please excuse me. I’m going to the Ladies Room with Buffy.”
CanadianJesus Murphy=An exclamation of surprise“Jesus Murphy! Do you see how tight his pants are?”
SouthernLord have mercy=An exclamation of surprise“Lord have mercy. Hand to heaven, I can see everything God gave him and it is not impressive.”
CanadianHad the biscuit=Dead or broken“Mike’s old Lada had the biscuit. It was time for a new car
SouthernBought the farm=dead or broken“Well butter my biscuit. Floyd’s done gone and bought the farm.”
And how about that Canadian Cuisine?

Poutine—French fries slathered in gravy and cheesecurds.Whaaattt? Southerners love anything that is deep-fried and covered in gravy.  Ketchup Potato ChipsWe love out BBQ and our BBQ chips in the South. I get this one Canada. I get it.
BaconAlthough I’m not into the back bacon (Canadian bacon) my research shows that Canadians love hog. So do Southerners. Get the skillet hot and let’s fry up some oink!

BeaverTail—or Queues de Castor (French) is a fried dough treat that’s shaped to resemble a real beaver tail and is topped with chocolate, fruit and even candy.This sounds amazing. Wonder if they can make some with pralines?
Tourtière—This is a traditional spiced and savory meat pie from Quebec, made with diced or ground pork, veal, or beef. In the South we add some garlic, eat it out of a bowl and call it Burgoo.
I can’t wait to use my new Canadian vocabulary and I will post pictures of everything I eat in the Great White North.
Ey y'all!

A Look into My New Book and the Unknown with Psychic Medium, Kathryn Kauffman

A Paranormal Suspense Novel as Life Imitating Art
When I decided I wanted to write a book about a hospice nurse who could see the spirits of those who come for the dying, I did what any former journalist turned novelist would—I began my quest with research. I used what I knew from personal experience, interviews and articles I’d read to craft the story and character of Indriel Luce—a woman with the first name of an angel and a last name meaning light. After I wrote, Lead Me From Temptation—a work of fiction that is tagged at booksellers as paranormal suspense—I felt the need to take a deeper look into the world around me that I didn’t see, but my main character could. I contacted a Psychic Medium—a person who has the ability to sense and communicate with beings and energies in other dimensions including those who have died––and asked for an interview. It occurred to me after I’d fired off the email that 1) someone with this type of ability might not be interested in speaking with a fiction writer and, 2) I should consent to a mediumship reading myself. How else could I validate the answers to my questions?Psychic medium, Kathryn Kauffman in Lexington, Kentucky graciously consented to my interview not knowing anything about me other than what I’d told her in my email or what she could’ve read online. What I discovered after meeting her was that the universe is uniquely designed to bring people together as Ms. Kauffman was not only a psychic medium, but also a nurse—just like the heroine in my book. Kauffman has the ability to speak with those who’ve crossed over as well as those who’ve stayed behind on this dimension. I asked her to “read” me and connect with anyone that might want to contact me. I won’t share that very personal experience, but I will say that from the moment I walked into her office and she said she had messages for me, I was astonished to say the least. I’d read up on minimal encouragers or clues someone could use to read my reaction to information in order to skew it in the right direction (the look on my face or a tiny nod to show the person they were on the right track with their reading) and went into our meeting prepared to be stone-faced and unaffected. I didn’t matter.Kauffman had a page of messages written down and waiting for me before I arrived. And her messages were spot on. She conveyed things she couldn’t have possibly known—things I’d never shared with anyone except for the person who’d died. I was floored and honestly had a hard time pulling myself together to conduct the interview on the heels of the reading.That being said, the experience did allow me to pose questions I might not have otherwise asked.As a psychic, Kauffman can foretell the future. As a medium she can connect with those who’ve passed.We’re all on an energy path in life according to Kauffman and it’s created out of positive and negative decisions. For the most part, it’s a predictable journey. To look into someone’s future, she deals with the person’s living energy and can see a predictability based on the way they make their decisions. I wondered if that meant we all had a predestined life and according to her, the answer is, no. “Eighty percent of everything in a psychic reading can change simply by a person changing their predictability pattern,” explained Kauffman. “When someone makes a conscious decision to change the course of their life a whole new energy path starts to develop.”This was a reaffirmation of what I always believed to be true. You are the captain of your own ship in life, even though the rough seas. But what about looking into the past and connecting with people no longer living?  Kauffman has been dealing with the otherworldly her entire life, discovering her abilities at an early age while living on Midway Island in the South Pacific.“My first recollection is at the age of four. I remember I was alone in my room and I could hear heavy breathing. So I held my own breath and that someone or something continued to breathe.”Kaufman, who has two aunts who perform professional readings, spent the next twenty years opening herself up to her abilities. From age 20 to 40 she practiced nursing and was a highly accommodated ICU nurse with experience in seven different specialty areas. “All through nursing school and being an ICU nurse I always did readings on the side for my friends and family. If a friend of a friend needed help they would send them to me. Then I got involved in some paranormal groups and volunteered my time with them. In 2004, I joined Kentucky Paranormal Investigations until they dissolved in 2013.”Donating her time to helping those with paranormal problems, Kauffman has assisted numerous families deep in the throws of a haunting. “I’ve seen a lot of paranormal activity and I’ve seen a lot of paranormal activity in the hospital. It’s not all––good.”Being the curious person I am, I wanted to know how I could be in touch with the universe like my character, Indie Luce. According to Kauffman it has nothing to do with magic and everything to do with Quantum Physics and Mechanics—the study of the behavior of matter and energy at the molecular, atomic, nuclear and even smaller microscopic levels––but in particular, brain waves.Our brains are comprised of a tight network of nerve cells, all interacting with one another and creating an electrical field—your nervous system. Anywhere there’s a nerve cell there’s electricity. And since the biggest concentration of nerves are around our heads, that’s where most of the action is.All our thoughts are formed in this electrical field and the measurable happenings in our brain’s overall electric field are our actual thoughts racing through the mind. In fact, as you read this article, you are creating energy because your thoughts are energy—just like everything else.This brings me back to brain waves. Kauffman gave me an interesting lesson during the interview. These are the basics: There are a few types of brain waves and based on what we are doing, these waves operate at different frequencies.  Most of us work throughout the day with Beta Waves flowing. At 14-40 HZ this means you are awake, alert and have focal awareness. This is where we are able to complete tasks.Alpha wave 9-13 HZ is a relaxed, calm state where we are in a light meditation. This can happen when we are reading or into a movie, daydreaming or for me as a writer, when I’m in the zone. “Alpha is also where the Schumann Resonance resides,” explained Kauffman. Schumann Resonance is the global electromagnetic resonance phenomenon of the earth. Which means, when we daydream or in my case write, we are in perfect harmony with the earth. “The vibration of the planet is identical to your brain wave state and this is where psychic communication can take place.”Theta wave, 4-8 HZ is a trance like state. This according to Kauffman is where the dead communicate. “It is a deep, meditative state and I have to prepare for it. I do an hour of meditation before I see a client for mediumship.”According to Kauffman, Theta is also your sleep state—where the dead communicate in your dreams. “If you’ve had a dream of someone who has passed, that is an actual communication. They wait until you get into Theta wave and dial you up. Theta wave is like the dead’s cell phone signal.”But according to Kauffman the way the dead communicate through dreams isn’t always literal. “Unless it’s really obvious, you have to look at the whole concept of the dream to interpret what they’re trying to convey.”Finally, there is Delta wave, 1-3 HZ, which is deep unconscious sleep. Delta is involved in triggering the release of hormones that help the body heal and recuperate and also plays a role in transferring new learning into long-term memory storage. It is the brain wave of most babies.Because it’s all energy and brainwaves, Kauffman believes that everyone has the ability to be in touch with the other side. “I hate it when people say, ‘it’s a gift.’ It’s an ability. Just like going to someone to fix your car, they have the ability to do that. You could learn to fix your own car but you probably don’t want to. Everyone has the ability, but most people shut it down, block it and say it doesn’t exist. There’s nothing mystical about it. It’s all energy.”If anyone can reach that level after years of practice and meditation, how would one ever tell the difference between the messages they are receiving from the dead and their own thoughts? According to Kauffman, it simply sounds different. “Your intrinsic thought has a different tone. The message you receive has another amplitude than the thought. It’s louder and it impresses upon you more.”Kauffman explains that she can do psychic readings all day, but mediumship or speaking to the dead is different. “I limit the mediumship because if someone was sick or hurt badly, I feel what they feel. One of the ways they communicate is to show you the pain because it’s an identifier of who they are and what happened. I have to be careful how many I do and I try to limit it.”In fact, Kauffman restricts the amount of communication and will only do one mediumship a day, three days a week.  “When it starts to become too much, I have to push back. It’s an energy exchange. I push them away and I stay in charge.”When I asked about spirit guides, she laughed. “I hate the cliché spirit guide and I wish there was something else to call them. They’re here to help us and it cheapens it to me to try to put a face on them. It’s just the mental image you make up.”Kauffman was straight forward in her reading with me and does this with all her clients. “When I do a mediumship, I’m going to give you exactly what I get. I want to use my abilities to help or clarify a situation.” She intentionally leaves out accidents and deaths. “If there’s nothing a person can do to change what’s going to happen then I’m not helping. I’m only causing undo stress and anxiety.”When I asked if that was a heavy burden to bear she confirmed for me that it was.
In fact, she gets messages she can’t do anything with. “I’ll be in Theta wave at two in the morning and there are those who are like, Hey Kathryn. Let’s talk! If I have a mediumship the next day, sometimes they’ll (the dead) show up the night before.”Kauffman also feels as if what we see on television isn’t necessarily true and reality TV is not all real. “I think people come here and expect the Long Island Medium and as you can tell by looking around you, it’s not really that way. I don’t doubt the readings, but the set up is probably a little more than real. I do think people are more open to this type of communication because of what they’ve seen on TV.”And she’s right. People are flocking to psychic mediums for answers. According to the American Federation of Certified Psychics and Mediums, Inc. More than 670,000 people paid to consult a psychic medium in 2012. Sixty percent of those clients were women as opposed to men. But what are some good reasons to seek psychic counsel?“On a psychic level, I would say that 80% of the people who walk through the door to see me already know the answer to their own question because their subconscious is already connected to everything. I pull messages from the subconscious and interpret them for the client. What I do is give them clarification and verification that what they are feeling is correct—because most of the time they already know the answer to their question.”Others come to connect with those they’ve lost. Kauffman makes no guarantees that a loved one will come through in a mediumship or that the person you want to connect with will show up. In fact, you could come looking to connect to a brother or sister and end up hearing from a long lost uncle or an old neighbor.Before I ended our interview, I asked her if she could give one piece of advice or information to the world what would it be. “What happens after you pass is determined by your own consciousness,” Kauffman explained.Then she asked me a question of her own. “Kris, what do you think happens to you when you die?”I explained that I felt like I’ve always strived to be a positive force in the world. I like to think of myself as most people do, full of light and love and I hoped when I died I would move toward the poetic white light I’d always read about. Her reply? “You’re not movingtoward the light, Kris. You are the light.”
*NOTE: While interviewing Ms. Kauffman, I used a digital recorder. She encouraged me to do so during my reading as it’s easy to forget messages that come through. It did not capture the first part of my meeting with her, which was my reading. But when I began to ask her questions strictly for the interview, it did record (cue the creepy music).
About Kathryn KauffmanKathryn provides private readings, mediumship and paranormal services for the communities of Lexington and Louisville Kentucky. She has published works in meditation, poetry and paranormal subjects on Kindle. She is an active teacher and offers seminars, private lessons and weekend intensives on Beginner and Advanced Psychic Abilities. 
To read more about Kathryn or to schedule an appointment or phone reading go to: www.kathrynkauffman.comor email at kkauffman309@gmail.com


Lead Me From Temptation by Kris CalvertLEAD ME FROM TEMPTATION
Indie Luce is burnt out, broke and Divinely Marked. A hospice nurse acutely aware of the Spirit World around her, she tries desperately to piece her life together after the suicide of her twin brother just one year ago. Taking a position to provide end-of-life care for one of the most powerful men in the world, she finds herself unknowingly in a battle for her sanity and more importantly her soul. As a spiritual war rages silently onward, descendants of those like Indie are systematically tempted and taken and the momentum to tip the scale into depravity becomes impossible to stop. What Indie Luce doesn’t know about her past could place her future in the hands of Darkness. Can the light of one selfless young woman hold the key to the delicate balance of good and evil? She is only one. But what if one is all that is needed?
www.kriscalvert.com

                           



                            LEAD ME FROM TEMPTATION BOOK TRAILER

Kissing: "Honey, I have a headache. Can you make it go away?"

The kiss. Romance writers describe it all the time. But what is it exactly? It seems to be more than just lip on lip action. Because it feels like so much more, I did a little research and it turns out kissing doesn't just feel fantastic it's also good for you. So pucker up and get healthy.
“As his lips brushed over hers, she knew she’d just burned off the calories of a Tic Tac.” As the heart beats faster it releases adrenaline, also known as epinephrine and other neurotransmitters in the blood. The boost in adrenaline increases your metabolism and helps burn calories. A study by Dr. Alexander DeWees showed “a passionate kiss, lasting about twenty seconds can burn up to 2-3 calories per minute.” “Kiss my ass.” or “Kiss me baby.” Want to feel better emotionally? During a lip-lock the brain releases dopamine and which is responsible for feelings of desire and bonding, and serotonin that elevates your mood. The feelings and emotions stirred up, and molecules and chemicals released throughout the body from a kiss can heal emotional “boo boos.”“Honey, I have a headache. Can you make it go away?” After a long day do you have a little back pain? If so, take 2 kisses and skip the pain reliever. Kissing releases natural chemicals in the body called endorphins that can be more powerful than the narcotic morphine to relieve pain.*SMOOCH* “Wow, I feel very relaxed.” In the moments of a great kiss, the chaos of the outside world is quiet, there’s silence in the mind, and the body relaxes and releases stress away. A kiss lowers stress by decreasing the body’s cortisol levels also known as the stress hormone. At the same time kissing stimulates the brain and creates a sense of peace and calmness by altering the body’s oxytocin levels.“My skin treatment? I’ll never tell.” Kissing involves 34 facial muscles, and 112 postural muscles and helps to keep your face toned. The most important muscle involved in the peck is the orbicularis oris – as it puckers the lips. “I love kissing you way more than going to the dentist.” Throw in a little tongue and you may keep the dentist away forever. Kissing increases saliva production and this saliva washes away bacteria that can cause cavities, tooth decay, and plaque build-up.“Forget the Kleenex, give me your lips.” Kissing decreases IgE antibodies in the blood that are responsible for the release of histamine. Histamine release in the blood stream causes allergy symptoms such as sneezing and watery eyes. Therefore, more kissing means less sneezing and histamine release.  “Kissing is better than Crestor.” Kissing keeps your blood pressure & cholesterol level low. A study of cohabiting and married couples showed an increased frequency of kissing decreased stress, increased relationship satisfaction, and decreased cholesterol levels. Stress is a well-known risk factor for heart disease. Therefore kisses keep you heart healthy with a one two punch by lowering blood pressure and cholesterol levels and stabilizing the cardiovascular system. “Kiss me baby. I feel a cold coming on.” Swapping spit means swapping germs and that is nature’s natural vaccination. Being exposed to others’ germs your body makes antibodies against those germs, which can in turn lead to immunity and prevent illness.  “A diamond is forever, but kisses will help you live longer.” Kissing your man goodbye in the morning can increase his life by 5 years. It’s true, studies have shown men live longer when they are married, and kiss their spouse or partner goodbye in the morning. Sorry ladies, the same is not true for us. But a great kiss can curl your toes and leave you wanting more when he comes home.