Kevin Lintner's Blog, page 5

Review: The Tick People by Carlton Mellick, III.

The Tick People by Carlton Mellick III
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

"The Tick People" is an odd and brooding work from one of my favorite authors, Carlton Mellick, III. An entire population of people have taken root on the back of a giant dog who must be kept sad at all times because even a few wags of its tale would cause an apocalypse and wipe out Gloom Town. The story centers around Fernando Mendez, a Stressman, who is employed with the task of keeping the giant canine as sad as possible. Mendez is nagged into going to The Matchmaker by his overbearing sister in hopes of finding his perfect mate who turns out to be a half-human, half tick monstrosity that disgusts him so much he can't stop mating with her. The whole book seems to be more of an exercise in gross-out fiction than anything else. It starts out promising, giving us a very well detailed look at a Dystopian Whoville like world, but quickly starts to feel forced and overdone. Don't get me wrong, I still enjoyed it very much, just not as much as other Mellick books that I've read.

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Review: Vampire Dominatrices From Mars vs. The Zombies of Christ by Jeff O'Brien

Vampire Dominatrices From Mars Vs. The Zombies of Christ by Jeff O'Brien
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

"Vampire Dominatrices..." revists the town of Needham, MA, where the "Great Halloween Orgy Massacre" took place decades before. Let's stop for a moment and appreciate the name "Needham." If I were a city, I would be called Needham because of I don't get a decent ham sammich for lunch or a slice of country ham for breakfast at least once a week, I become a very grumpy person. Good thing for me Winn-Dixie is selling off-the-bone deli ham for 5.99 a pound. That makes some excellent grilled ham and Baby Swiss sandwiches.

But anyway, this is another excellent book from Jeff filled with his signature gory b-movie madness, social commentary and kinky sexy stuff.
Jeff has yet to become predictable or boring which is the true death for an author. I' will be ordering his latest The Groom of BigBoobenstein
later this week, and I am sure I will not be be disappointed.

*** This just in! I have been informed that the name of the town is indeed Leedham, MA not Needham, MA. See what I mean? When I don't get enough ham, I start hallucinating pork products.

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Review: The Book Of The Occult by Simon W. Clark

The Book of Occult by Simon W. Clark
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

As debut novels go, "The Book of the Occult" sets the bar very high for its very talented author, Simon. W. Clark, to top. The reader is swept up into the story of Peter Ashton who, as a teen, attempted to perform an occult ritual that resulted in the death of his best friend. Many years later, Peter sets off to Europe to research the book he used to perform the ritual and finds himself entangled in a web that includes a murderous former government agent, a secret society, gypsies, and things much more dark and frightening than he could ever imagine. The plot of this story is rich in detail and filled with well-defined and memorable characters. It never drags and keeps the reader engaged from start to finish. I'm sure you will enjoy this fantastic blend of historical, occult, and suspense fiction as much I did.

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Baby Fever by Kyle NobleMy rating: 5 of 5 starsBaby Fever...

Baby Fever by Kyle Noble
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Baby Fever is a laugh out loud gorefest in which women and driven to mate, procreate, and then kill their sex partner by some strange virus or chemical or something that turns women into breeding and eating machines. The protagonist is trapped in an adult novelty store and uses all items at hand to defend himself from the ravenous horde. Definitely not for everyone as the violence and sex are taken to the extreme, but I loved it. So if you're into pedal to the floor insane horror, this is for you.

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Review: The Giving of Things Cold and Cursed by Terry M. West

The Giving of Things Cold & Cursed by Terry M. West
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This is a horror story, yes, but the horror lies not in the events that are occurring during the narrative, but in the possibility of untold terrors to come. This dark tale is beautifully written and its true power lies in the brilliant descriptive powers of Mr. West. It is an elegiac tale of love and loss and comes with my highest recommendation.

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Review: Stuck on You by Jasper Bark

Stuck On You by Jasper Bark
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Poor cheating Ricardo heads of to Mexico to buy what his tolerant wife refers as "artesanians" to sell at their roadside stand. As he prepares to return to the US, he is stopped by Consuela, a not unattractive woman who asks him for a ride across the border. At first he balks at the idea, but after Consuela drops the slightest hint she might have sex with him, his two-timing nature takes over and he agrees to give her the ride.

Along the way Consuela reveals she is a mule and is smuggling something into the country. During a stop, Consuela lures Ricardo into the woods where they have all kinds of crazy sex which culminates in Ricardo's behind getting struck my lightening during a surprise storm fusing the two of them together with his penis permanently stuck inside her vagina.

Things then proceed to go downhill for Ricardo.

"Stuck on You" is loaded with explicit sex, gore, and even a few laugh out loud moments as Ricardo ponders how to explain the naked corpse fused to his body to his wife.

As long as you can handle balls out horror and violence, I recommend this awesome novella.

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Review: Shadows in the Sand by Michael Diack

Shadows in the Sand by Michael Diack
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Michael Diack has written a brilliantly original dark fantasy centering around a group of humans who somehow survived a catastrophic world event and their struggles to survive against terrifying forces while their sole water supply dwindles away. The high point of the novel is the breathtaking detail Diack puts into every part of the story. Characters, action, and scenery are all beautifully described that they almost seem to be painted for the mind's eye by a master artist. Shadows in the sand is a thrilling, richly detailed novel that will leave you longing for the next book in the series.

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Review: Aegis Rising by S.S. Segran

AEGIS RISING - Action-Adventure/Sci-Fi - Book One of The Aegis League Series by S.S. Segran
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

A group of five teenage friends are tossed into a lost civilization when the plane they are traveling in is struck by lightning and crashes. The book is filled with many influences from Lost to Percy Jackson to the survivalist action of the Hunger games, yet manages to stand on its own as a daring and original work that should appeal to the targeted young adult demographic and beyond to older readers. I had a lot of fun reading this book and eagerly look forward to the next book in the series.

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Review: Simon Says - Serial Killer David Simons by Peter Hallett

Simon Says - Serial Killer David Simons by Peter Hallett
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

"Simon Says..." is a darkly comic, over-the-top, gore filled novella that could only come from the mind of Peter Hallett. David is a bit of a wallflower. That is until his wife chats on him with his own cousin and he develops a split personality named Simon who forces David to play the most twisted game of Simon Says ever. Simon takes David on a cross-dressing rampage that is as laugh out loud funny as it is gut wrenching. Excellent work!

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Review: The Royal Dragoneers (Book One of the Royal Dragon Saga) by M. R. Mathias

The Royal Dragoneers by M.R. Mathias
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

There is never a dull moment with this book. It starts with a dragon encounter and then whiplashes into the main plot and never lets up on the adrenaline pumping action. That characters seem real and are very engaging, you come to care about them while reading the book. If you like the kind of fantasy that comes with everything from dragons to trolls to orcs and evil goblins bent on destroying the world of man, then get a copy of this as soon as you finish reading this review. It's amazing and loads of fun.

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