Pat Powers's Blog: Pat Powers Goes BEYOND Outer Subspace! - Posts Tagged "funny"
"Late Nights On Onion Station, A Parody of the EarthCent Ambassador series
If you LOVED Date Night On Union Station] (Book 1 of the EarthCent Ambassador series) you'll LOVE Late Nights On Onion Station the sexy, sexy parody of "Date Night on Union Station" written by the infamous Pat Powers, author of Crazy Aunts and Scary Uncles and Jenkie Jenkins, Interstellar Sex Reporter.
Onion Station lies in the outermost reaches of human-explored space, a gigantic artifact created by the alien Zuks, artificial intelligences that are so badly programmed that they are extreme libertarians. They run Onion Station with a fine disregard for safety, comfort and well-being of the various alien species that dwell in their station, including the humans.
But it's the beings who live in Onion Station that make it the unique, exciting and strange place that it is, and when the Earth Ambassador to Onion Station starts dating an actual human man (much to her mother's relief) everything changes on Onion Station. This simple act of dating will bring together a fascinating group of characters:
Kitty Reinhardt, the human ambassador to Onion Station, is totally dedicated to her work. She earns the 25 cents an hour that the tight-fisted Zuks pay her the hard way, i.e., attending diplomatic receptions and helping Earth firms negotiate trade deals with the many other alien races in Zuk space. She's proud of what she does for humans in her role as ambassador (but it is too bad about the starving people who die regularly in the lower corridors of the human sector of Onion Station). But it's her relationship with her more than just comfortable chair that is a source of deep shame to her, even though she's not at all guilty about her taste for kinky maledom/femsub bondage sex.
Mike Bonus, the trader with a heart of gold who buys the contracts of starving humans by the dozens on the cheap at Onion Station and sells them off to slave traders on crapsack worlds for a fat profit – and who is revered as a saint by the humans whose contracts he sells.
Kitty Reinhardt's chair, which seems sentient to Kitty, given that it converses with her and does things to her that previously were confined to safely nonsentient machines like vibrators -- but which the Zuks SWEAR is not sentient.
The Sisters of Mercy, who rescue starving humans crawling through the mean corridors of Union Station ... but whom many starvelings would describe as anything BUT merciful.
Dweezil the Dreddarian, a six-limbed otterlike alien with a sharp eye for info-trading and a very commercial approach to friendship.
The Fringe, treelike aliens who have a taste for Earth epiphytes to hang in their canopies.
And the Zuks, the artificial intelligences who run Onion Station and live in fear of the massive artificial intelligence that runs the station itself, because it's definitely one of your more godlike artificial intelligences, and it's just as benevolent as the Zuks who created it.
But most of all, you'll have fun, and lots of it, as a favorite series is parodied senseless by someone who has read and enjoyed every book in the series.
And if you have not read "Date Night on Union Station" go ahead, get over there, dig in, you'll enjoy it! The whole series is on Kindle Unlimited! It's sexless, but it's fun. And "Late Nights On Onion Station" well, it provides all the kinky sex an adult mind needs to ... adult ... and it's ALSO on Kindle Unlimited!
Onion Station lies in the outermost reaches of human-explored space, a gigantic artifact created by the alien Zuks, artificial intelligences that are so badly programmed that they are extreme libertarians. They run Onion Station with a fine disregard for safety, comfort and well-being of the various alien species that dwell in their station, including the humans.
But it's the beings who live in Onion Station that make it the unique, exciting and strange place that it is, and when the Earth Ambassador to Onion Station starts dating an actual human man (much to her mother's relief) everything changes on Onion Station. This simple act of dating will bring together a fascinating group of characters:
Kitty Reinhardt, the human ambassador to Onion Station, is totally dedicated to her work. She earns the 25 cents an hour that the tight-fisted Zuks pay her the hard way, i.e., attending diplomatic receptions and helping Earth firms negotiate trade deals with the many other alien races in Zuk space. She's proud of what she does for humans in her role as ambassador (but it is too bad about the starving people who die regularly in the lower corridors of the human sector of Onion Station). But it's her relationship with her more than just comfortable chair that is a source of deep shame to her, even though she's not at all guilty about her taste for kinky maledom/femsub bondage sex.
Mike Bonus, the trader with a heart of gold who buys the contracts of starving humans by the dozens on the cheap at Onion Station and sells them off to slave traders on crapsack worlds for a fat profit – and who is revered as a saint by the humans whose contracts he sells.
Kitty Reinhardt's chair, which seems sentient to Kitty, given that it converses with her and does things to her that previously were confined to safely nonsentient machines like vibrators -- but which the Zuks SWEAR is not sentient.
The Sisters of Mercy, who rescue starving humans crawling through the mean corridors of Union Station ... but whom many starvelings would describe as anything BUT merciful.
Dweezil the Dreddarian, a six-limbed otterlike alien with a sharp eye for info-trading and a very commercial approach to friendship.
The Fringe, treelike aliens who have a taste for Earth epiphytes to hang in their canopies.
And the Zuks, the artificial intelligences who run Onion Station and live in fear of the massive artificial intelligence that runs the station itself, because it's definitely one of your more godlike artificial intelligences, and it's just as benevolent as the Zuks who created it.
But most of all, you'll have fun, and lots of it, as a favorite series is parodied senseless by someone who has read and enjoyed every book in the series.
And if you have not read "Date Night on Union Station" go ahead, get over there, dig in, you'll enjoy it! The whole series is on Kindle Unlimited! It's sexless, but it's fun. And "Late Nights On Onion Station" well, it provides all the kinky sex an adult mind needs to ... adult ... and it's ALSO on Kindle Unlimited!
Star Treque: Attack of the Kinky Slave Girls! -- An Erotic Parody (Collar World Book 6) Now On Amazon
Amazon Link
International Bookstore Link
I enjoyed parodying "Late Night On Onion Station" so I thought I'd give parody another shot, this time a SLIGHTLY better-known property, "Star Trek." I'm a fan, watched TOS, the Next Generation and some episode of Voyager and Enterprise, as well as all of the movies. I even married a woman who went to Dragoncon wearing a tribble suit. I didn't marry her FOR that reason, but it should be noted that it didn't deter me in the slightest, in fact, it was cool to me.
So I felt fully qualified to parody Star Trek. I decided to base my parody on TOS, because let's face it, there's a LOT of room for parody there. Most especially sexual parody, since The Original Series was an unreconstructed product of the sixties, with Captain Kirk jumping on any green-skinned alien woman he can find and Lt. Baskethead (I mean, Rand) sexing up the show for no particular reason, a task soon taken over by Nichelle Nichols.
I didn't entirely confine myself to TOS characters, I included Lieutenant Worf (Lt. Rorf Woof in my story) from Next Generation mainly because I was going to have Klingons, too, and he would come in handy for several reasons.
For the same reason, I had an Orion slave girl ("Aurion" in my story) as a cultural attache on the crew, helping integrate the Orions into the Federation, or as I called it, the Agglomeration. Encountering the Empire of the Collar (essentially, Collar World in space with gigantic men, because why the hell not?) the Participation Prize crew would naturally call on an Aurion slave girl for advice on how to deal with such a sexy menace.
Especially since the Empire of the Collar is technologically far in advance of both the Agglomeration and the Klingons (“Klaxons” in my story). It would have made an interesting story for Star Trek, except of course that Star Trek would never have been sex-positive and kink-positive.
And of course, being an erotic parody I was free to follow the sexiest, kinkiest elements of the story as far as I wanted to, which was very far, indeed. And I did not neglect the humor either, I had a LOT of fun with story and characters.
It's a shame media Trek could never follow where I have gone before. I've been to science fiction conventions, I've SEEN what the fan base gets up to, left on their own. They would have loved it. In the meantime, there's my parody, I'm hoping fans will love it. Maybe you will, too. Either way, live long and pump her.
International Bookstore Link
I enjoyed parodying "Late Night On Onion Station" so I thought I'd give parody another shot, this time a SLIGHTLY better-known property, "Star Trek." I'm a fan, watched TOS, the Next Generation and some episode of Voyager and Enterprise, as well as all of the movies. I even married a woman who went to Dragoncon wearing a tribble suit. I didn't marry her FOR that reason, but it should be noted that it didn't deter me in the slightest, in fact, it was cool to me.
So I felt fully qualified to parody Star Trek. I decided to base my parody on TOS, because let's face it, there's a LOT of room for parody there. Most especially sexual parody, since The Original Series was an unreconstructed product of the sixties, with Captain Kirk jumping on any green-skinned alien woman he can find and Lt. Baskethead (I mean, Rand) sexing up the show for no particular reason, a task soon taken over by Nichelle Nichols.
I didn't entirely confine myself to TOS characters, I included Lieutenant Worf (Lt. Rorf Woof in my story) from Next Generation mainly because I was going to have Klingons, too, and he would come in handy for several reasons.
For the same reason, I had an Orion slave girl ("Aurion" in my story) as a cultural attache on the crew, helping integrate the Orions into the Federation, or as I called it, the Agglomeration. Encountering the Empire of the Collar (essentially, Collar World in space with gigantic men, because why the hell not?) the Participation Prize crew would naturally call on an Aurion slave girl for advice on how to deal with such a sexy menace.
Especially since the Empire of the Collar is technologically far in advance of both the Agglomeration and the Klingons (“Klaxons” in my story). It would have made an interesting story for Star Trek, except of course that Star Trek would never have been sex-positive and kink-positive.
And of course, being an erotic parody I was free to follow the sexiest, kinkiest elements of the story as far as I wanted to, which was very far, indeed. And I did not neglect the humor either, I had a LOT of fun with story and characters.
It's a shame media Trek could never follow where I have gone before. I've been to science fiction conventions, I've SEEN what the fan base gets up to, left on their own. They would have loved it. In the meantime, there's my parody, I'm hoping fans will love it. Maybe you will, too. Either way, live long and pump her.
Pat Powers Goes BEYOND Outer Subspace!
A blog for me to talk about my books, the writing life, and whatever else lodges deep within the steamy recesses of my alleged brain.
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