R. Leib's Blog: Dream State, page 5

My first review

I got my first review on Amazon today. It was very complimentary and came with five stars. I hope that this will garner a little more attention for "The Negative's Tale". Even if it does not, it is encouraging to have my work recognized.

How I deal with despair

I was pretty sick this past week. That's why no blog entries. Not that anyone would have noticed. No activity on my book either. One of the things that they don't tell you about getting old is that small injuries heal sooooo slowly. I used to get cut, and the next day, I didn't even need a Band-Aid. Now, that cut nags at me for days. They gang up on me. Before one is dispatched, two more have joined the chorus. So much of living is over for me. I will never fall in love again. (My wife wouldn't hear of it.) I will never have another adventure. (The ones I had as a youth scared the bejeezus out of me, anyway.) There is no way I am going to be able to finish a fraction of the projects I have in my mind.

So why do I go on? Why don't I give up? I could live the rest of my life in retirement reading, playing on the computer, and watching television. So why don't I? The answer always comes back to that unidentifiable something in me that won't quit. I think the thing I am proudest of my father for wasn't his heroism as a soldier or his contributions to the health field at NIH. It was the day, when I was a child, that he stood on a family's lawn so that the KKK could not in secrecy burn a cross there. I like to think that, given the same choice, I would stand next to him on that lawn. So how can I let all those little obstacles beat me?

Maybe no one will ever read what I write; I have still written it. Maybe no one will ever know who I am; I am still that person. And I am still here.

Writing

Writing is like erecting a real building out of toy blocks. The project follows you around constantly nagging at the corners of your mind like a recalcitrant child. A short story is the equivalent of an apartment, but a novel, that's the whole high-rise.

Second week

Things are going well although slowly. The change to the subplot is working out well. I have written about the equivalent of a short story. Research continues. As does refinements of some of the concepts behind the story. It is important for Fantasy and Science Fiction writers to establish base concepts that delimit the circumstances and actions in their stories. Other fiction writers are bound by the realities we all share. Our genre allows us to create "realities" for our readers that are the product of our imaginations. This advantage, like all advantages, comes with responsibility. Without a logical construct to which our readers may anchor their suspension of disbelief, we lose their trust.

How things change

Last night, it occurred to me that an element of one of my subplots was not imaginative enough. I thought about it for a while, and came up with what I think is a much better idea. This is where writing a plot summary comes in handy. It was easy to change a bit of description in the summary, and now that concept is very different. I have started writing that part of the book, and I have to say that I am much more enthusiastic about how it is going than I would have been with the way it was originally.

What happens next?

Now that the project is started and the first flush of enthusiasm has been invested in preparations, the hard, long hours of writing begin. The hardest part is getting myself to put in the writing time on a regular basis. I will not be able to finish the novel within the time limit I have set for myself, if I am not consistent in my dedication to the work. Every day, no matter how small the contribution, I must move forward. I have set a pace for myself to have the rough draft finished in four months. Then the editing and re-editing begins. I do not know about other writers, but I have a need to evaluate every word to make certain that I am confident of its contribution in telling the story, that it is the right word for the moment, and that it does not disrupt the narrative flow.

First Week

It's been four days since the beginning of my new project. Here is what has happened so far:

The major characters have been blocked out. This is not to say that they are set in stone. I might tweak their descriptions and traits to fit how the story develops, and I might add more characters, discard characters, or split or merge them.

The primary and main back stories have been summarized. Once again, these may be modified to refine or improve the flow of the narrative. This summary gives me a framework and a rough roadmap to guide me, while I construct the story. I have a plan for most of who does what and what happens to them. A list of suspects have been formed, but I have yet to decide who is the culprit, if there is one. That information will evolve on its own during the writing process.

The basic research into the science behind the events outlined in the plot summary has been done. Notes and Excel spreadsheets have been created containing the information necessary to make the details and occurrences as scientifically reasonable and as consistent with each other, as I can make them. This does not mean that I am done researching. New elements that arise during the writing of the "Tourist of Infinity" will require further checking. Things that I have not considered yet will need to be resolved. Research never ends. It outlives the writing process itself.

The first few pages have been written.

New project

I was talking with someone who read "The Negative's Tale" a couple of days ago. One thing she said got to me. She asked me to write another Allon Wu story. I did have one in mind, but it takes place at the end of his life. I have been thinking about it, and have come up with another challenge for the central character of "The Negative's Tale". There will be a new mystery to tangle with that has twists and surprises and concealed motives. I have taken the first step on that long journey today with the first pages of "Tourist of Infinity".

Thanks Laura.

Is my hair really that long?

Sometimes. I'm not fond of getting haircuts. So I get one a year at the start of summer. By that time, it is that long. I think the ladies at the place where I get it cut consider me a challenge. In any case, they seem really happy to see me.

What it is like to be old

It is layered like a planet. The inner core is the person I feel I have always been. Memories of early childhood are faint now, so it is the persona that developed during my teen years that seems to be the essential me. With each year, I expected to feel older, wiser, more sophisticated, in some ways a different person, but there is still that teenage boy in there. Sure, my body is weaker. I heal much slower. My hair is a patchwork of gray and white. My hearing and sight are frustratingly impaired. My vocabulary has increased and then declined. I have committed to memory and have forgotten whole encyclopedias of facts and ideas. Experiences have layered themselves upon me in scars and regrets forming a mantle of complexity. All this is covered with the crust of manners that other people see. But these are all strata over the child that still dreams and empathizes and finds puns amusing.