Barnaby Wilde's Blog

Summer Sale, Woo hoo!

 

The Smashwords eBook Summer Sale is now on and will run until the end of July 2025. All of Barnaby Wilde's eBooks are in the sale and many are FREE. Whatever your taste (as long as you like quirky with a touch of the absurd) there's a book to suit you. Quirky verse, Short stories, Time Travel, Detective Fiction, even a touch of sci fi. Why not try There Still be Dragons. Absurd stories about a very short king, his very tall daughter and their friends.
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1063992

Mercedes Drew the collection, new paperback

 

  Mercedes Drew the collection: The Mercedes Drew Stories, vols 1-3 Paperback – February 11, 2025 by Barnaby Wilde (Author) Part of: Mercedes Drew Mysteries (1 books) See all formats and editions

Volumes one to three of the Mercedes Drew Storiesare now available in a single paperback. Nine short stories about Mercedes Drew, her 1969 Triumph Bonneville T120 motorbike and her boyfriend Detective Inspector Desmond Flowers.

A warehouse robbery, a train derailment, a missing cat, arson, kidnap, a stolen rhinoceros head, a post office robbery, a body in the woods and more, collected into a single volume. Also includes a preview of volume four, 'Smile for the Camera', a full length Mercedes Drew Mystery featuring an art theft from a country house, a rock festival, a missing girl, a photographer, a dead body and all Mercedes biker friends.
Volumes one to three (Flowers for Mercedes, Free Running and Flandra, each containing three stories, are still available as separate volumes). All editions are also available as eBooks. Flowers for Mercedes can be downloaded FREE here




.

Valentine's Day anyone?

 It's that time of year again, heading up to February 14th and you ask yourself, 'What's less fattening than chocolates? What lasts longer than flowers? What's cheaper than perfume? What's more thoughtful than a card? What's as exciting as red lace underwear?' and the answer is LOVE, a collection of short stories (14 stories) by Barnaby Wilde, loosely based on the theme of love. Stories of meetings and partings. Stories of hope and loss. Romance, danger and wishful thinking. A little humour, a dash of pathos and a whole lot of love.

You can find the paperback here http://tinyurl.com/Love-Barnaby-Wilde (Amazon) and there's still time to order before Valentine's day. 
Amelia goes for coffee and finds a man. A boy meets a girl on a train and misses his chance, or does he? Julie goes to the fair on her own and has her best birthday ever. Two young people rob a gas station with disastrous consequences. And, sometimes, you just know.

If you did this last year, then why not look at one of Barnaby's other books?
(PS For maximum brownie points you could always buy flowers as well. Just sayin')

The Women Furies (vol 2) - New collection of stories from the Poachers Inn

The second volume of stories from the Poachers Inn is now available in eBook and paperback format.

Ten more tall tales of inane banter and unlikely happenings from The Women Furies Quiz Team and their arch rivals, the pub Darts Team. Why did Mike, the landlord buy five hundred plastic ducks? Why did Barnaby wear a dress to the garden party? Who exactly is Bismark? And how did we lose Ron?

Answers to these and more irrelevant questions can be found in The Women Furies, volume 2 now available through your favourite online bookseller in eBook and paperback.

Purchase at Amazon https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0DSML85S9

Barnaby Wilde is a Liar

 BarnabyWilde, of course, doesn't exist. Even his name is a joke. (If youhaven't got the joke yet, think Steppenwolf and, if you still haven'tgot it, you'll have to Google).

Thetruth is that Barnaby Wilde is a liar. He makes things up. Heconfabulates. He tells stories for personal gain. You can't believe athing he says.

Thequestion is, why does he do it? The obvious answer, one mightsuppose, is that he'd like to be rich and famous, but even he doesn'tbelieve that's going to happen. So, why?

Perhapshe just wants to be loved? Actually, that might not be too far fromthe truth. Certainly he's delighted when someone tells him thatthey've enjoyed reading something he's written. In fact, he gets farmore pleasure from a piece of positive feedback, such as a bookreview, than he does from any commission he might make from sellingit. In that case, you might ask why he doesn't give all his booksaway for free. Well, he has this strange belief that the only praiseyou can truly trust comes from the stranger who's laid out his ownmoney. If someone takes the trouble to leave a positive review forsomething they've paid for, then it's probably genuine praise.

Maybehe's insecure? He needs to feel needed? Perhaps, though he has plentyof people around him who appear to find him useful. He certainlydoesn't admit to feeling insecure.

Couldit be that he just has an urge to be creative? Now, that surely has aring of truth to it. He's certainly tried his hand at a few creativeendeavours such as wood turning, pottery and painting in the past.Writing, though, has been there at some level or another ever sincehe was a kid. One of his earliest memories is of his fatherone-finger typing a story that Barnaby had written at his PrimarySchool and turning it into a miniature book. (No idea what everhappened to it, sadly).

Onthe other hand, could it just be conceit? Maybe he just wants otherpeople to see how clever he is? He swears it isn't, but it's anunconvincing denial.

Barnaby'sown explanation is that he simply wants to entertain, amuse, andmaybe, occasionally, mystify people. He loves the sound of words. Heloves puns and rhymes. He says his head is full of stories and hethinks other folk might find them diverting.

But,as I said at the beginning, you can't believe a word he says. Hemakes things up.

Youcan find out more about Barnaby Wilde and his books athttp://www.barnabywilde.ukfollow him on bluesky @barnabywildeauthor.bsky.social or buy his books at Amazon (or your own favourite bookseller).

 

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/barnabywilde

Why not go Wilde this Xmas?

 

Everyone likes to receive cards at Xmas, but sending them is getting more expensive all the time and though they look nice for a few days when displayed, eventually most of them end up in the bin. e-cards cost  less to send, of course, but don't really lend themselves to being displayed and lack the personal touch, somehow. So, here is an alternative suggestion.

There are lots of e-Books for Kindle or other e-Book reader that are either FREE or cost only a few pence, including several of Barnaby's.
 Why not send an e-Book instead of a card? A lasting present for less than the cost of sending a Xmas card.

The e-Book won't necessarily be Xmas themed, of course, and they are no more displayable than an e-Card, but they will be longer lasting and potentially create many hours of enjoyment.

Here are some suggestions from Barnaby. 



The link will take you to Barnaby's books at Amazon, but they are also available at your own favourite e-Book retailer.
Amazon.co.uk: Barnaby Wilde Author


All of these titles are FREE or less than a pound in Kindle format. (They are, of course, also available in paperback format along with all Barnaby's other titles)

Happy Christmas everyone and 'good reading',

from Barnaby Wilde

Interview published in Vision and Verse. The blog of Carol Ann Kauffman

 

The following interview was published today in Vision and Verse, the blog of Carol Ann Kauffman(link to original publication https://visionandverse.blogspot.com/2... )Wednesday, July 31, 2024 INTERVIEW: Multi-Genre British Author Barnaby Wilde AKA Tim Fisher

Tim Fisher

Although I publish under the name 

Barnaby Wilde

By the Sea in Devon, England

UK

 

Good morning, Tim, and welcome to Vision and Verse. I’ve read the Mercedes Drew Mysteries, Volumes One and Two. They was terrific! I loved them. Look for the reviews coming up onAugust 20 and September 3, 2024.  Can you tell us what else you’ve written? 

I am a fiction writer, with several novels and many collections of short stories and verse published as eBooks and paperbacks. My website is barnabywilde.uk All the books are available at Amazon/Apple/Barnes and Noble etc

 

What is your favorite genre to write? 

I have written in many genres, including sci-fi, cozy mystery, romance, humor, time travel etc but everything is written with humor and a sense of the absurd, including a series of books written as fairy tales for adults (sorry, no sex or violence, just laughs) full of princesses, dragons, court jesters and anachronisms.

 

Favorite food. 

I am an omnivore that enjoys all food.    

Tea or coffee? 

Tea for breakfast, coffee mid-morning and tea again in the afternoon.

 

Pizza or ice cream? 

Love both. Favorite pizza would be pepperoni and favorite ice cream, rum and raisin.

 

Wine or beer or soda or what? 

Not a big drinker, but I like a glass of wine or elderflower cordial with my meal and a beer when I’m out.

 

Where would you like to visit? 

South America, especially Iguassu falls, or Australia.

 

Favorite musical artist. 

Paul Simon, Tom Petty, Dire Straits

 

Do you listen to music when you write?  

I generally write in a silent room. Writing is essentially an antisocial activity that requires full attention without interruptions.

 

What makes you laugh? 

Absurd humor, Dad jokes.

 

Favorite work of art or sculpture. An impossible question to answer, it changes all the time. I can’t name a single favorite.

 

How old were you when you started writing? 

I wrote my first ‘story’ when I was about seven or eight years old. I have no recollection what it was about, but my father one finger typed it onto tiny pages which he stapled into a miniature book, sadly long since lost. I’ve written intermittently throughout my adult life, but only began publishing in my fifties. Initially, these were collections of verse (I hesitate to call it poetry), followed by a couple of novels and subsequently collections of short stories in various genres.

 

Do you plan out your book with outlines and notecards? Or just write? 

There is little planning. I have an idea and then the characters take over. Often, they take the story to places that surprise even me. I usually have an end in mind, but sometimes even this changes as the characters refuse to do what I tell them and take me to a different place.

 

Describe your perfect evening. 

I’m very much a ‘home’ person. I enjoy dinner with my wife, followed by an hour or two of TV, unless she drags me out to a music venue or a theatre.

 

Where do you get your inspiration? 

Often, just as I am about to go to sleep. The best stories are those that I write in my head in the middle of the night. Unfortunately, they are often forgotten by the morning. I am rarely awake enough to make a note. Inspiration, though, can come at any time or place.

What do you do when you get a writer's block? 

It doesn’t happen very often, but if I do get stuck, I usually make myself write the next paragraph and come back and back to it until I’ve edited it, changed it, or replaced it with something that lets me continue. It will stay in my head the whole time until I have sorted the way forward.

 

Who is your favorite author? 

Kurt Vonnegut. I like his sense of the absurd and his understanding of the folly of human nature.

Best book you ever read. 

Breakfast of Champions, because it was the first Vonnegut book I ever read.

 

Last book you read. 

Apple Tree Yard by Louise Doughty.

 

What would you do for a living if you weren’t a writer? 

I am retired and writing is a part time occupation. My career was working for an international photographic manufacturing company, but if I were to live my life again, I think I’d like to be an architect or a garden designer.

 

Who is the one person who has influenced your personal life the most and why? 

Another tricky question. If I am only allowed one person, the answer can only be my first wife and the mother of my two children. If I can sneak in a second, then it would have to be my present wife because she challenges my preconceptions and takes me to places I would otherwise not find.

 

If you could sit down and have a conversation with ONE person, living or dead, real or fictional, who would it be and why? 

I am going to surprise myself here and say my mother. I think I have only begun to understand and fully appreciate her recently, many years after her death and too late to tell her in person.

What advice would you give someone who aspired to be a writer? 

Just write.

 

Do you have some links for us to follow you? 

Amazon https://www.amazon.com/stores/Barnaby-Wilde/author/B0067XT7D0

 

Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/timgfisher (Barnaby doesn’t have his own Facebook page, maybe he should?)

 

Website  www.barnabywilde.uk  links to all bookstores and books on the website

 

Email  barnaby-wilde@hotmail.co.uk

 

Blog  barnabywildeauthor.blogspot.com

 

My style is very gentle. I want to entertain and amuse, not shock. I like word play and puns. I like to think that my stories or verses may sometimes surprise people, certainly make them smile and maybe even generate the occasional belly laugh.

 

The next book to be published will be volume two of Davey and the Holey Oak. Ten more short stories about an irascible old man always looking for the next big chance.

 

 

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ByCarol Ann Kauffman's Vision and VerseatWednesday, July 31, 2024Email ThisBlogThis!Share to TwitterShare to FacebookShare to Pinterest

Smashwords Summer Sale FREE/Discounted eBooks

 

The Smashwords Summer Sale is now running until the end of July. Thousands of eBooks at discounted prices or FREE. All of Barnaby Wilde's titles are in the sale with at least 50% discount. Many titles are FREE here https://tinyurl.com/BarnabyWildeatSmashwords

New Barnaby Wilde short story collection: Davey and the Holey Oak (volume 2)

Nobody woulddescribe Davey as a kind, old gentleman. Some folk would call him cantankerous,others would say he was a bit dodgy, and some, less generous, would call him amiserable, tight fisted, old bastard. Davey thought of himself as anentreprenoor (his spelling).

Volume twoof Davey and the Holey Oak stories contains ten more tall tales about an oldman just trying to get by. Learn about the Unpredictable Nature of Wild Yeast,hear the tale of Bill and Wayne, find out what is a Strewn Field, and discoverthe pitfalls of planting Acorns.

Also includes a bonus prequel story to the novelOut of Time.
Now available as an eBook or Paperback. Visit www.barnabywilde.uk for more information.
eBook at Amazon here https://tinyurl.com/Davey-and-the-Holey-Oak

 

Psychiatrist has a silent P

Barnaby, like many before him, has been thinking aboutEnglish spelling and how irregular and unnecessary much of is. On theunderstanding that big things start small, he is now considering whether tostart the revolution by refusing to incorporate unnecessary letters orillogical spelling in any of his future riting.

Hensforth, Barnaby wil only aply the minimum efort to spelany of his wurds in the customry manor, eschuing convenshun, histry andtradishon. He estimates that this wil save him aproximately  wun per sent of the leters he normaly has totipe, with a consekwent saving of wun per sent of the ink and paper used toprint them, thus preserving many trees and conserving natural resorses inadishun to redusing the number of keystroks he wil need to make and conservinghis own energy.

Of cors, this wil make his books wun per sent shorter, thono kwiker to reed.

Fortunately, all of his current books were written beforethis revolution began, making life more straightforward for readers used todealing with conventional English spelling. Any errors are therefore entirelyunintentional and the fault of the author, except where they have beenintroduced intentionally.

Why not try ‘Out of Time’ a full-lengthnovel about two men whose timelines get inextricably mixed. I can’t guaranteeany misspellings, but you can enjoy searching. You can find it in paperback oreBook format at Amazon here https://tinyurl.com/BarnabyOutofTime

(Also available at Apple, Smashwords, Kobo etc)