Jennifer Sivec's Blog, page 18

#AmWriting

#AmWriting.

Resilience

I love this Rose bush for so many reasons.

It’s set at the edge of my driveway and there’s a story behind it. A few years ago, I didn’t like where it was planted. I thought it was awkward and out of place so I decided to transplant it to a different section of the yard. I dug it up and moved it to where I thought it would look best.

The next spring, much to my chagrin, it sprouted back up in its original spot. The rose bush was coming up nicely in the area that I moved it to and I couldn’t figure out how it managed to grow back in its original spot, after I dug it up, roots and all.

I decided to leave it and see what happened. The first summer it grew up some, still gangly and out of place. Every time I left the driveway, I shook my head in annoyance that it was still where I didn’t want it to be.

But last summer it really took off and started to become something bigger than I ever imagined. And now, it’s a huge beautiful bush.

I’m amazed every time I look at it, at its resilience. When I reflect on its growth, I think of how my life has somehow rendered the same amount of strength and resilience.

I’ve also been uprooted many times, but somehow I’ve managed to stay rooted to the original place I started from. I don’t know how, but it’s happened.

I wrote about it in my book, reflecting the strength of human nature through my characters, Brynn, Rose, Adam. And I’m amazed at how human nature, nature in general, can somehow demonstrate such growth and beauty after being completely upended. Yet somehow we just journey through and manage to become more amazing and more resilient than we ever thought possible.

Whether its a cancer diagnosis, marriage difficulties, loss of loved ones, or difficult beginnings. We somehow find ourselves growing through even the most adverse conditions. It’s a lot to envision from a simple Rose bush, yet every time I look at it, I think of where I’ve begun and where I am now.

The Roses continue to grow and the bush gets bigger and more beautiful every day. There are hundreds of buds on it now, and I am happy every time I look at it. I think that we are the same and that over time, we grow and become more beautiful, more amazing, more than we ever imagine in spite of ourselves and our conditions.

I can’t wait to see how beautiful it will be in a few more years. And I I ever move, I’m taking it with me, uprooting it again. Hopefully it will grow back for whoever lives here after me, demonstrating its beauty and resilience once again.

Busy Life

I started working out…again.

One of my Facebook friends Rick, asked me if I ever slept-between family, busy career, writing, and now working out. I juggle a lot, always have. We all do.

And it’s difficult. So many people say they wish there were more hours in the day. But if there were, we would just fill them up too. Time is precious and short, and all of those other cliches we hear. Rarely do I ever have any down time, even when I really I need it!!! But I still get a lot done somehow.

I’ve learned a lot about time management and goal setting in my grown up job. And even though I don’t have time for EVERYTHING, I feel that my full life is worthwhile. I feel like I am experiencing the moments as I’m supposed to…not just like I hope to.

I do a few small things…

1. Plan Ahead when possible

2. Set small goals

3. Set realistic goals

4. Let go of the things I don’t need

5. Live in the moment

I don’t claim to be an expert in the matter. I have plenty of days where I am frustrated with myself and feel as though I am lacking in more than one, if not all of the roles in my life. But I give myself permission to fail, and then I get up the next day and start all over. I’ve forgotten pajama day at school, missed deadlines, and gone weeks without writing one line. But I tell myself it’s okay.

My children are happy, my relationships continue to grow, and I contribute to the world the way that I was meant to. The small goals get accomplished, and before I know it, I’ve finished a novel and knocked something off my my bucket list!

At the end of the day, I am fulfilled. And I am thankful for the grind, the responsibility, and the Purpose that I have in my life. I wouldn’t change anything

HI from Jen!

Getting inside Jen’s mind

I recently self-published my first novel on Amazon.com, “Leaving Eva.” It’s a story that’s been bubbling inside of me for years, and one day I finally starting clicking away at the keyboard. Suddenly Eva came out.

I’ve always been pretty private about myself, about my life, for most of my life. Self publishing was a big step for me in joining this very voyeuristic world that we live in, and I was uncomfortable at first. I’m a pretty social person, working very closely with people every day, in my grown up job. But private about myself and about my thoughts. Writing a novel meant that I had to bare a little bit of my soul to the world, terrifying to say the least.

So a blog seems pretty ironic to me.

But I decided to start one as a way to connect. As a way to improve my writing and drive my passion. I’m realizing that by being so closed off most of my adult life that I’ve been missing out on a lot. ‘

So I wrote this book. It’s not a romantic comedy, or a sexy thriller or a love story. It’s ugly, and sad, and downright depressing at times. It’s about loss, and love, and being lost in your fear and in your own mind. I wrote it because I needed to and because it just came out as easily as breathing, sometimes. I wrote it because I was abandoned as a child at the same age as the main character and I needed to exorcise some demons.

I don’t know who will follow this blog. It’s just about me and my thoughts about life, about family, about writing, and about anything I can think of to write about. Writing has always been a passion, a salvation, and a way to lose myself in order to keep myself sane.

Welcome to my blog. I hope you will visit often and lend me your feedback and your comments whenever you feel inspired to do so!