Lisa M. Buske's Blog, page 96

You Don't Have to Wait until Dark...Look Up

Photographs on today's blog taken by Mary Buske This past week many were waiting for the lunar eclipse. Some stayed awake into the wee hours of the morning while others went to bed, set their alarms, and got up when it was time. I thought about doing one of these but decided, I'd just check out everyone's pictures the next morning on Facebook and the news.

I'm glad I didn't lose any sleep because most in my area reported on Facebook that due to the cloud cover, they couldn't see the full beauty of the eclipse. I did enjoy seeing the pictures on the news and the ones people posted on Facebook but they were more enjoyable because I wasn't exhausted from staying up all night waiting to see something I couldn't see.

As I thought about this, the families of the missing wait for something to happen, knowing the odds of their loved one being found alive are slim to impossible. Life is full of choices, to believe we'll never see our loved one again OR accept their discovery/recovery are in God's timing and wait on Him to answer prayers to bring him or her home. If we give up hope ,then we might not recognize the moonlight of night ,still shines during the day time. What does this require of us...to slow down and look up. With this analogy, you'll see the moon is still visible during the day.

On a deeper and more spiritual level though, we'll see God is with us in the darkest of days and times. Each of you has something that brings you sorrow, pain, anxiety, or grief. Not everyone's life tragedy makes it on the front page of the paper. Some of you might be going through something very difficult yet to those outside your immediate family, no one knows. Whatever your struggle today, I challenge you to look up. The Light is always there, waiting for us to call on Him. God is Light.

We start Easter weekend today, with the Maudy Thursday services. Tomorrow is Good Friday. On Sunday, Christians will celebrate the resurrection of Jesus on Easter Sunday. I spent more than a decade avoiding Easter and the joyous aspects of it. Instead of thanking God for sacrificing His Son for my sins, I falsely blamed Him for taking my sister. Twenty years later, I am able to enjoy the Easter season with more joy and hope than in the past. It's still difficult at times yet now I know the truth, this is a weekend of hope and truth.

As we thank God for the hope and eternal life we're guaranteed through our relationship with Jesus, we have to remember something - acceptance doesn't take away the hurt or prevent further pain BUT it does provide us with someone to lean on, call to, and rely on when the darkest hours come.

Look up...the Light never goes away. We just tend to look away. Life is full of choices...I choose to look up and seek His face, what is your choice?

"Hear my voice when I call, Lord;
    be merciful to me and answer me.
My heart says of you, “Seek his face!"
    Your face, Lord, I will seek.
Do not hide your face from me,
    do not turn your servant away in anger;
    you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
    God my Savior."
Psalm 27:7-9

"I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
    in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
    be strong and take heart
    and wait for the Lord."
Psalm 27:13-14

"Look up into the heavens. Who created all the stars?
He brings them out like an army, one after another,
calling each by its name. Because of his great power
and incomparable strength, not a single one is missing."
Isaiah 40:26

Will you give God whatever is weighing on your heart today?

Don't Only Look With Your Eyes

This past weekend, Ed and I found a beautiful nature trail behind the Cayuga Community College in Auburn, New York. While there was a lot of brown surrounding us, the sun was shining, and it was the perfect temperature for a walk. We left the college full of high school athletes and drama clubs and went on a relaxing walk in the quiet. Who knew such serenity lie only a short distance from the hustle and bustle of high school training and competitions.

Ed and I held hands (because we could), laughed, teased, and simply enjoyed a couple hours alone. I did post to Facebook a couple times to share the fun, but for the most part...it was just us and the families enjoying nature.

The first thing I noticed was this bright red bench on top of a small hill overlooking a pond. It was brilliant and jumped out at us. I started taking pictures. Ed's laughter, the precursor to "Let me guess, a blog?" I gave him my, Who me? look and started snapping away. I'll be honest, I love the look of a brightly painted park bench yet to see its brilliance in the midst of such brown gloom, reminded me of the hope and sacrifice found in Jesus. Something as simple as a bench alone on the hill reminded me of the Savior, alone on the cross. Both bearing our weight with one offering eternal rest. Further into our walk I noticed this large nest up in the trees. My parents said it's probably a squirrel's home. If the leaves were on the tree, I might not have seen this humble abode so high above us.

Look at the birds of the air:
they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns,
and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.
Are you not of more value than they?
Matthew 6:26 ESV We paused for a moment to sit on the swing and absorbed the sun shining down on us. Warmth on our cheeks with a slight breeze offered hope of spring. Hope for Easter. Sunday is coming. We rounded one of the bends to see a bright yellow flower. Okay, so it's one of those pesky weeds we're always mowing in the summer but this past weekend, they were a splash of color and hope on a rather dreary walk in the woods.
Anyone who believes in me
may come and drink!
For the Scriptures declare,
'Rivers of living water
will flow from his heart.'"
John 7:38 NLT And we can't forget our weather predictor, himself, taking its time across the gray stone. Once again, color captured our attention and provided hope...
Here is another illustration Jesus used:
“The Kingdom of Heaven is like
a mustard seed planted in a field.
It is the smallest of all seeds,
but it becomes the largest of garden plants;
it grows into a tree, and birds
come and make nests in its branches.”
Matthew 13:31-32 To add a little adventure, we trekked across the wooden path over the water. We didn't see anything too colorful, but the laughter and adrenaline induced by the walkway yet to have its spring repairs provided interior joy.

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God
prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.
Ephesians 2:10

What brilliance of color gives you hope in the days leading to Easter? Will you share at least one?

It Started as Dinner...Today it's Answered Prayer

Photo taken by Melissa Hull A couple weeks ago I received a message from Eileen Parson, author, and new friend. Eileen and I have enjoyed an afternoon at the Sandy Creek Fair, during the Oswego County Fair, for an author's event. We've messaged a couple times but last month we had the opportunity to get to know each other better. Teen author, Alyshia Hull, organized a small "author's dinner" at a local restaurant. We enjoyed good food, much laughter, and got to know each other in the process.

Eileen's quiet and soft spirit relax you within moments are starting a conversation with her. As our dinner started, there were moments of quiet but this didn't last too long. Within moments, adults and teens alike were enjoying each other's company. By the time dinner arrived, the teen giggles had us all smiling. At this gathering were Aimee Quonce and her daughter, Alyshia Hull, and her Mom, Mary and I, and Eileen. One thing I admire in teenagers, is their ease in making friends and how quickly they become comfortable with each other. Our dinner time was no exception.

I enjoyed listening and watching the interactions, my cheeks hurt from laughing, and we were still talking about how enjoyable the evening was the entire ride home. Mary shared a question she's been trying to have answered with the group, the kids laughed and I only could shake my head. I've prayed and asked God, "How do I answer this in a way she'll receive the answer?" God is faithful and answers all our prayers, thank you Eileen for being an answer to prayer. I can't wait for Mary to read your blog.

To learn what Mary's question is and how God used Eileen to answer Mary's question, and my prayer...click on the photo above or the link below to read Eileen's beautiful and heartfelt blog.
http://parsonspapers.com/defining-love/ A little about Eileen Parsons, author:
"Eileen is a Christian speaker and author.  She has had a passion for writing since her youth, winning the Newspapers in Education Award for Writing in the Augusta Chronicle in high school.

Eileen attended Augusta State University, majoring in Communications and
Creative Writing.  Since then, her work has appeared in the Good Newspaper
in Syracuse, NY as well as various local Christian publications and newsletters.

Her first novel, The First Rose of Summer, published by Westbow Press, a division of Thomas Nelson, was released in December 2011.  It is her desire to share God’s Word through her writing.

In addition to her writing, Eileen is an inspirational speaker,  sharing her experiences in life – the painful as well as the joyful – to help others break through the barriers they face in life and discover the freedom that can be achieved through the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ.

Her topics range from healing after a heartrending loss and overcoming fear, to delighting in the joys and blessings
in life.  It is her desire to bring God’s hope and healing to others." (Taken from Eileen's website) To read Eileen's "Defining Love" blog, click on the first photo. To learn more about Eileen's book, click on her photo. Thankful for good friends and answered prayer.

What are you thankful for today?

A Day with the Oswego Children's Theater at HARMS

A lesson parents learn at an early age, our children may, or may not have the same extracurricular interests as us. While still in utero, one dreams of their son or daughter following in one of the parent's footsteps.

My husband, Ed, is a sports fan, and if I can brag, a great athlete himself. More so, "back in the day", lol. My hobbies and interests as a child were more theatrical in nature, with the exception of softball. This sport I enjoyed, but for the most part - riding my bike, swimming, or walking were just fun to do - not a necessity.

My favorite memories in the middle school are doing the annual play. As a fifth and sixth grader I was part of the chorus scenes - an Oompa Loompa and and a begger on the street. In seventh and eighth grade I graduated to Oliver Twist's aunt and an orphan. Our directors invested time, energy, and a love for the arts into each member of the production.

Although our daughter doesn't share her father's love for sports, she is a natural on stage. Ed and I spent today watching six different groups of kids perform, six cry different plays. Each school or community group had thirty minutes to shine and share. We laughed, cried, and were left speechless.

After each performance the kiddos were encouraged by the judging panel with kudos and areas they could expand on. Between the morning and afternoon sessions, the kids participated in break-out sessions to enhance or explore skills needed to work, act, or be a part of a theatrical performance.

This evening they enjoyed dinner with their new friends, then the awards banquet. Ed and enjoyed this day fir many reasons. First and foremost, we spent it supporting our daughter as she competed and learned new things. And the added benefit, we enjoyed walking on the nature trail while the kiddos attended their break out sessions. Who won the competition? At the time if posting this blog, I honestly don't know. In our opinion, every actor, actress, stage crew, tech person, director, and person who made each production and today's event such a joy...are all winners.

Children arrived quiet and nervous, sticking with their own groups. Over dinner and prior to the awards ceremony, there is much jubilation, sharing friend requests, and making new friends.

What do you think...is there really only one winner? I don't think so either.

A wonderful day to say the least. We are thankful to be a part of it.

Goals ~ Ours or His...A Change in Perspective

"Heidi didn't reach the goals she set when our high school decided to close its doors the year before her graduation. She didn't start her career and help children like she hoped to BUT...maybe she has, in a way only God could see..." Lisa Buske, 4/10/14 

As I worked on yesterday's blog, God spoke to me. I wrote the words and then paused to think about their meaning. I'll be honest, I almost didn't share it on the blog because I wasn't sure how its message would be received. Before I could finish this debate process with myself, God gently reminded me, it was His message to share, not mine. This is a thought and view point I hadn't thought of prior to last night.

Something many don't know is Heidi's dreams after college. During her internship for college, she worked at one of the local elementary schools with a program called Banana Splits. At times, her heart was heavy after meeting with the kiddos yet each one was worth it to her. She understood at a young age, the privilege it is to work with children. Heidi was on schedule to graduate with honors from college in May 94'. The time spent doing her internship spurred her goals for a lifetime of helping children.

Little did she know that a little more than a month prior to graduation, her dreams and desires would dissolve into the unattainable. I remember cleaning out her closet months later and finding the dress she bought the week before her abduction. It was our last "sister day" at the mall, and the last time we talked about her dreams. She never had the opportunity to wear this dress to an interview, it remained in the plastic Chappels placed it in for her to bring it home. Each time I looked at this dress, I cried at the loss it represented. I could only see the children she never helped. An idea, and on some levels, truth, the enemy used against me for years.

“Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.  And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” 1 Peter 5:8-10

To write yesterday's blog returned some of these thoughts and feelings. I grieved the children Heidi didn't help rather than recognizing or focusing on the bigger and more beautiful picture. There isn't a day I don't remember or lift a prayer for my sister, Heidi Allen. There are times in my life when I miss her more than others.

When I meet some of her Banana Split kiddos, or their parents, I leave our conversation with mixed emotions. First and foremost, I thank God for the number of lives she touched in her short eighteen years with us but then as I return home, I'm saddened to think of the difference she might have made in the lives of so many other children and their families.

This is where God opened my eyes to a different perspective on this very subject. Was Heidi kidnapped and prevented from accepting a career working with, and helping, children? Yes. BUT, was her desire and dream to help children stopped? NO!

Think about it, each year, Heidi's beautiful face and information about her kidnapping are shared with hundreds of cyclists participating in the Ride for Missing Children across New York. These cyclists spend months visiting schools to raise awareness of child abduction and exploitation. Thanks to our community, Heidi is never forgotten and hundreds, if not more, parents changed their parenting because of her kidnapping.

I've received notes, messages, and had conversations with adults who were young children at the time of Heidi's abduction. They share how Heidi's disappearance changed the things they were allowed to do overnight and even the way their parents interacted with them. Parent-child relationships were enhanced, improved, and developed. Two generations of families, thus far, show evidence of lifestyles and relationship changes...for the better. Children created new bonds and opportunities, ones they transferred to their own parenting.

One young, aspiring, and motivated teenager's kidnapping has changed the lives of hundreds, if not more. The enemy seeks to devour yet God used the greatest of tragedies, the loss of a child, to magnify this young woman's goals to help children to a number she could never of imagined.

This brings me much comfort. Rather than focusing on the children she wasn't able to work with or help, I need to keep my eyes focused on how God is using one girl's tragic abduction to change the lives of more than anyone could ever pray to reach. God is good.

The enemy might prowl but when we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus and in the Word of God, we will see how God is working for good...even when the pain might make it difficult to see. I'm thankful that twenty years later, God continues to show me His love.

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us,
to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:20-21

Can you think of a time you were able to see a situation or thought in a different light...after reflection and/or prayer?

One Week Later...National Sister Day

We found this news clipping when looking for pictures to share at the Gathering of Hope for Heidi last week. It wasn't labeled with what paper or a date, unusual because our family is usually very OCD about labeling. I'm going to guess it was one of the local papers - Independent Mirror or Palladium Times but I don't know. If it listed the photographer, we might of been able to figure it out...bummer...love the picture regardless. Thanks to whatever paper printed it and to my Mom for clipping it. The initial title of this blog was "One Week Later...More than a Gathering". Last week, some of Heidi's family, friends, neighbors, community, and many more gathered at the New Haven Volunteer Fire Department. The turnout was a reflection of a truth we've known for two decades and beyond...we are blessed and live in one amazing town.

Many might blink when they drive through New Haven, New York. You may not even realize you've left Mexico and entered Scriba yet to those who live here, this tiny community is evidence that neighbors still look out for, and support each other. Actually, our "community" extends into the neighboring towns and isn't determined by the invisible lines on the map. Ask anyone who is new to the area, one of their first comments is usually about how friendly and helpful everyone is.

Twenty years ago, Heidi's kidnapping brought fear, anxiety, and loss into our once quiet town. We had a choice to make. We could either succumb to the kidnappers attempt to steal both our beautiful Heidi M Allen, or we could join together. Last week's Gathering of Hope for Heidi M Allen reminded me of the determination, heart, fight, strength, and love nestled in our community. Tragedy came to town but it didn't rob us of our everything ~ we hold out hope, hope for Heidi.

The kidnappers may have taken Heidi and hold the answers to everyone's question, "Where's Heidi?" yet they don't have control over our town or family. God is in control and on the throne. His love, comfort, strength, and guidance were with us in 1994 when the Heidi Allen Command Post formed and He is still here, twenty years later. The outpouring of support last week was, and still is at times, overwhelming. So many remember exactly where they were on April 3, 1994. They remember who told them Heidi was missing. Some shared how they heard a girl was missing, didn't know who she was, but came to aid in the search because "if it was my daughter, I'd hope someone would do the same."

There is something special about Thursdays to me so when I realized the twentieth anniversary of Heidi's kidnapping was on a Thursday, I smiled. You see, Thursdays were "Sister Day", so to remember Heidi with some of the people who remember Heidi each year and throughout the year...priceless. Today is "National Sister Day", did you know that? My original plan was to simply reflect on our awesome community yet with it being "Sister Day", on a Thursday none the less. In memory of my sister, Heidi M Allen, I'd like to answer a question I was asked in the past couple weeks. I can't remember who asked me this question, I think it was one of the reporters but she wasn't the only one. I answered the question to the best of my ability yet I continued to think about it, as more than one person asked. It was a question I honestly don't give much thought to until something triggers it.

Let me share my best recollection, paraphrase, of the question asked. It may not be exact but you'll get the gist.

"How old is Heidi to you, in your mind?"

I had to think a minute yet I knew the answer but wasn't sure how to explain it . In one sense, Heidi "would be 38", yet she is eighteen. Last year, when Diana Trepkov updated her age progression, I was able to see Heidi as a thirty-eight year old woman but most of the time, Heidi is forever eighteen years old in my mind. When I see her friends posting picture of their kids going to kindergarten, receiving an athletic award, school pictures, or celebrating birthdays, I am reminded that Heidi "would of been", or that "she would be".

Do I know Heidi's physical age is four years younger than myself? Yes. Can I visualize her as this grown woman, not so much. The only reason I have a slight image is thanks to Diana Trepkov's skilled drawing. For the most part, Heidi is still the energized, motivated, beautiful, and determined eighteen year old looking forward to her college graduation in May 94'. She didn't graduate from college.

She didn't reach the goals she set when our high school decided to close its doors the year before her graduation. She didn't start her career and help children like she hoped to BUT...maybe she has, in a way only God could see. Be sure to read tomorrow's blog to learn more about this thought... Thank you for remembering Heidi.
How has Heidi's abduction changed your life?

TOP's Tuesday: News Coverage ~ 20 Years Later

Today's TOP's Tuesday is a little different than most blogs, especially a TOP's Tuesday yet I thought this would be a good day to share links to some of the online articles about the 20th anniversary of Heidi M Allen's kidnapping this year. You can click on the title of the article or the picture for a direct link. I don't have all the articles here, only a few. I tried to do my best to highlight coverage that shares the joy, hope, and love our community has for Heidi.

Thank you all for remembering her and our family during this challenging time and throughout the years.
Mar 26, 2014
People still remember disappearance of
Heidi Allen after 20 years
Debbie Groom / Featured Stories , Oswego News  
The Valley News

Community Gathering of Hope for
Heidi M. Allen tonight in New Haven
April 3, 2014
The Valley News April 4, 2014

Hundreds Turn Out To Remember Heidi Allen

Posted on April 4, 2014   by  Steve Yablonski Syracuse.com Coverage Sister of missing Heidi Allen speaks about hope at Heidi Search Center in Texas Prayers, candles, lanterns -- but for vigil-goers, few answers in 20-year search
for Heidi Allen Where's Heidi Allen? The biggest mystery in Oswego County turns 20 years old Yesterday's Blog Players from the Heidi Allen mystery: Where are they now? Finding Heidi Allen would be 'the ultimate' in Oswego County sheriff's 40-year
career Twenty Years Missing
 Posted by Slamdunk  on Monday, March 24, 2014 
     
 On the morning of April 3, 1994, eighteen-year-old Heidi Allen was working alone at the D & W Convenience Store in New Haven, NY. Thank you for remembering Heidi and our family...

Planning, Preparation, and Prayer prior to the Gathering

Lisa Buske, photo bomber is Lisa Brooks, and Palladium Times reporter, Micaela Parker I know it's odd to start this week's blogs before the actual Community Gathering of Hope but at the same time, I think there is something to said about the time of preparation. So often in life we spend hours, days, weeks, and sometimes months preparing for an event without remembering why this occasion deemed so much of our time, energy, and attention. Can you relate? One of the biggest events most people plan are their wedding, graduations, milestone birthdays and anniversaries, or maybe even retirement.

Instead of stressing out over the little things along the way, we need to embrace the opportunity to work alongside those we love to make whatever the occasion is all the more special and memorable, for whomever is being honored, or in our case...remembered. Last year, on the 19th anniversary of Heidi's kidnapping I released my book, Where's Heidi? One Sister's Journey. To release my story of how Heidi's kidnapping affected my life and faith on the anniversary date of her kidnapping was my way of honoring Heidi's memory and sharing hope with others.

This year, the 20th anniversary of Heidi's kidnapping, we wanted to do something to remember Heidi, her kidnapping, and show appreciation to our community at the same time. Mags and I had a few ideas of how to make this a memorable and uplifting time yet wanted it to be a family affair.

Between emails, messages, table talk, and phone calls between my parents, family, and friends...the gathering and vigil came to be. It was during this time of preparation that we shared memories of 1994, ones some of us didn't remember. After scanning the pictures, we realized there were things we'd forgotten until seeing the pictures, and this sparked great conversation. This memory making could of been lost if we were too busy to slow down and enjoy the preparation. Another wonderful thing about organizing, planning, and preparing for an event...the people you spend time with. I'm thankful for my husband, Ed, and my brother-in-law Scott. They took the day off, switched schedules, and spent their entire day helping us. Ed and Scott loaded and unloaded  both vehicles multiple times. They made a trip to Oswego to pick up balloons, another trip to pick me up dinner (because I hadn't eaten and they were concerned, aren't they sweet).

They hauled everything into the fire barn and helped set up for the gathering. There was much laughter and teasing. You see, I tend to me a bit OCD with my organization. I had sticky notes on the table cloths designating their location. I made a color-coded diagram of the room in case a surplus of people showed up to help. Each box, laundry basket, and bag was labeled with its general purpose. My goal was to make the set p as pain free and relaxing as possible. I think the fun and loving teasing is evidence, this was a success. Our original hope was to use the same balloons for the 20th anniversary as we did in 1994 but they finally lost their elasticity, well to a degree. While we couldn't fill them with helium anymore, we do have a lot of hot air so we found a way to mesh the old with the new.

With new black and orange balloons lifting to the sky, the old Where's Heidi? balloons were taped to the tables as part of the decorations. Down the center the of the tables were new buttons. Half were made last year with my website and the phrase started in April, twenty years ago, Where's Heidi?. The others were newly made buttons portraying the same photo of Heidi from her missing person's flyer with a new phrase..."Always Hope". The old and the new meet. During the quiet of the afternoon, in the few moments before the New Haven Auxiliary arrived to start the coffee and setting up cupcake trees, I took a few pictures of the hall.  It was peaceful and bittersweet. I sat in the swivel chair reflecting in how the hall itself had changed since 1994. I posted a few signs used in 1994 to pint volunteers in the right direction. As I looked at them and at the different plaques on the walls I was reminded of the amount of change that happens in a twenty year time. Some we don't usually realize or pay attention to.

Fire halls are renovated all the time but does the community appreciate the care taken to keep their volunteer fire department current? Sometimes. The gathering was an evening to remember Heidi and also share the new and improved hall with some new to the area and others, that hadn't visited since they searched for Heidi. One woman said, "I haven't been here since I searched for your sister. They've done a lot of work. It looks great. One thing is the same, they (New Haven Fire men, women, and auxiliary) sill care for their community." I couldn't of said it better myself.

If I would of focused on the lists and things to do, I might of missed opportunities to reflect on how life in our small town has not only changed, but improved. I could of missed a chance to laugh with my husband, daughter, and family during one of the most difficult weeks of each year. It was in the planning and preparation I prayed for my family and community. I prayed many would believe and leave encouraged and inspired. While the tragedy of Heidi's disappearance and kidnapping continues to tear at the hearts of many, God's love, hope, grace, and mercy are new every morning and available to us all.

Rather than rush through the planning and preparation, remember to slow down and pray the one you plan to honor and the ones you plan to invite. You never know how God might use you. Encouragement is found is the smallest of things, not always the big things.

You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing.
    You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy,
 that I might sing praises to you and not be silent.
    O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever!
Psalm 30:11-12

Do you let the stress of planning interrupt the joy of preparation? Will you in the future?

A Time of Relaxation Before the 20th Anniversary

This past Wednesday I decided to enjoy some family time in the midst of last minute errands and preparations. Ed, Mags, and I crossed the last items off the list and then enjoyed some time by the water. Although it was chilly, it was nice to stop and appreciate God's beauty around us. Mags thought an updated photo for Facebook and the blog were a good idea too so we did a photo shoot too. So much fun. She saw Ed and I sneaking a kiss, then said, "Hey, do that again but..." and the above photo came to be.

One thing we have learned over the past two decades is to take time for ourselves so the stress of the anniversary doesn't swallow us whole. This might not make sense to everyone but if you've experienced tragedy or loss, you will most likely relate. There were mixed times of teary eye all week so we made sure to enjoy moments of laughter in the midst. Some of the poses and photos will never be shared publically yet here are a few.

Thursday, April 3, 2014, the 20th anniversary of Heidi's kidnapping was a difficult day. The days leading up to it, and the days to follow hold much emotion. We are so grateful for all of you. Your love, support, and remembrance of Heidi and our family is such a blessing to the entire family. Heidi M Allen will never be forgotten, this we know. Thank you.

I plan to share more this week with pictures form the community gathering and vigil. Too much to squeeze in to one or two blogs. My hope for TOP's Tuesday, is to link the news articles about the 20th anniversary. The rest of the week, I'll share a snip-its of how this double-decade anniversary had its ups and downs. Thanks for remembering Heidi and encouraging us!

The Day After...

Reflective...
Thankful...
Blessed...
At a loss for words...
Leaking Eyes...
Hopeful... Thursday was the 20th anniversary of Heidi's kidnapping.
Is there something that stands out to you
as you reflect back at the different articles you read,
the newscasts you watched, or something you did
to remember Heidi? Will you share?